The Disappearance of Donna Paulsen
by SafetyNotGuaranteed
Summary: After Harvey proves that he's not much of a family man after his marriage with Donna falls apart, his 8 and a half year old niece shows up on his doorstep after her mother's death making him compelled to become her caretaker for the summer. Can Harvey's niece help him reignite his life and his love for Donna after completely disappearing from his life for over seven years?
1. The Curious Case Of Angela Specter

It was a slow morning for Harvey but for him it was just another Sunday. He worked on a case for a week for Refn Agriculture in which his company was being sued for tax evasion due to Refn being accused of laundering his money in a Swiss bank. Turns out he was laundering his money but Harvey managed to work his magic and get Refn off the hook based on the lawyer's history of targeting clients who launder money so he can use the details to put the money into his own.

To relieve himself from boredom Harvey received an email from another client. He made himself a damn fine cup of coffee with ham steak, fried eggs with hot sauce and blood orange juice as he down in front of ESPN. The newscasters were hounding each other in a heated debate about the odds of soccer player John Terry joining an MLS club due to his poor run of form and being substituted at half time by manager Jose Mourinho for the first time in his career.

 _Knock, knock._

Always thinking of the worst and Lars Refn's ties to the Danish mob, Harvey shut the TV off and gradually strode towards the door standing to the side of the door where the hinges were and listened for movements. All he got were small knocks that came from halfway down the door which confused him. He looked out the peephole but couldn't see anyone with worried him even more. He swung the door a quarter of the way open, "Hello?"

"Hi?" Harvey responded staring at the little girl with brown hair and opening the door fully.

He looked confused because he didn't recognize her. He shifted his head outside his door slowly and saw no one else walking in the warm hallway and the elevator wasn't moving so no one could have dropped her off.

"You come here all alone little girl?" Harvey asked.

"Yeah," The little girl said croaking.

She looked worn-out and thirsty like she'd been running which was dangerous because it was scotching hot. She had fair-ish skin, had a green backpack, a white t-shirt with baby Groot dancing imprinted on it, blue skirt, and black shoes.

"Sorry but I think you got the wrong place." Harvey said politely and backing away slowly from the door to close it.

"I pretty sure I'm at the right address." The girl said quickly.

"I'm not looking to buy any cookies. I've got a supply in my kitchen and-"

"Are you or are you not Harvey Specter?" The girl asked. Harvey stopped and moved the door out of his way and looked at the girl again.

"Just say I was Harvey Specter, what would-"

"Your brother is...well he was my father. You remember your brother Uncle Harvey?" The girl asked sadly looking down and not meeting his gaze.

 _Marcus_

He hadn't heard his brother's name since he died of suicide. He couldn't handle his restaurant because his business was slowly withering from new competitions and he knew it when his bank failed to give him a loan based on his credit score. When Harvey heard Marcus had hung himself in his office he was devastated because Marcus never once asked him for help. Maybe he thought Marcus would be too embarrassed to help him since Harvey 'gave him 100k' to help with his business.

On the day of the funeral he stayed behind with his wife Michelle and stared at Marcus's tombstone thinking about how special he was and yet how his potential was never fulfilled.

But this was eight years ago. If this girl was Marcus's daughter then she must have been in her mother's womb and he remembered how sad Michelle was on the day of her funeral because she cried about how his daughter would have been an orphan.

"So you're Marcus's daughter, what's your name." Harvey asked.

"The name's Specter, Angela Specter. Well its Angela Christina Specter." She said smiling that resembled Marcus's.

"And what would that be dependent on?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"The time, the day, the time of day oh and how angry you are on a scale of 1 to 'you're dead'." She said forcing a smile.

"That's a nice name you got there kid." Harvey said smiling.

"I thought you would have remembered my name." Angela said looking up puzzled.

"It's been over eight years and time doesn't fly. You forget and change a lot in eight years. Plus you weren't named when your dad died so yeah." Harvey said.

"What if I was lying to you at this moment?" Angela asked curiously looking up at him and raising her eyebrow.

"What would an eight year old have to lie about?" Harvey asked.

"A lot like my name, my age and who I am."

"Why would you lie to me?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"Maybe I've been trained from the government."

"And what would the government assign you?"

"To get info about a certain Harvey Specter. If an adult comes to your door and asks you for your money then you'd be scared, right? Or you'd kick him in the face if you were Bruce Lee before he could blink. But if a kid comes then you'd feel sorry for them, but they could be as dangerous as an adult. Like Hit-Girl." Angela said smiling.

"That's a movie you shouldn't be watching at your age. Plus are we talking about same government that want a bunch of misfits, a talking raccoon and a walking talking tree with a vocabulary of a two year old to protect the galaxy?" Harvey asked pointing towards her Groot shirt.

"He doesn't have the speech of a two year old. It's just limited to I, AM and GROOT, specifically in that order." Angela said pouting.

"I'm just kidding. C'mon in Groot, you must be tired." Harvey said scratching head.

"I prefer being called Angela. Or Angie, my mom called me Angie." Angela said as Harvey saw her reminiscing of her mother.

"Well I'm gonna call you Grootie now." Harvey said moving away from the door letting Angela in with a smirk on his face.

"I AM GROOT!" Angela said giggling.

"How long have you been holding that one for?" Harvey asked.

"Ever since I arrived from the airport." Angela said walking inside Harvey's apartment and looking around.

"You know for someone who's 8 years old-"

"I prefer being called 8 years young-"

"Getting to the point, you're smart for your age." Harvey said.

"But I'm eight and a half." Angela said looking back up at him.

"No you're eight, we're not rounding numbers-"

"That's a big difference of 6 who months and I don't know how many days because maths is too hard. Plus Algebra sounds funny to me. It has the word bra in there." Angela said giggling but equally as amazed as she looked at the view of New York.

"I still don't trust-" It was as if Angela had read Harvey's mind as pulled a slip of paper out of her pocket and held it up for him and took a seat on the couch, relieved as she sat down.

His eyes focused back onto the piece of paper which was a boarding pass which surprised Harvey because he wondered how she boarded a plane in the first place. He sat on the couch opposite of Angela and studied the boarding pass further. It must have been authorised because airlines wouldn't want a kid to randomly fly to anywhere in the world. The date matched, her birthday marked her as eight years old, she departed from London, UK where Michelle might have been living at the time and because he remembered Marcus mentioning how much Michelle loved London.

Harvey then thought _'What the hell was happening?'_ which was added by his mouth gaping and his eyes widening at a steady.

"How the heck did you manage to fly from LA?" Harvey asked looking at Angela and throwing the boarding pass onto the table next to his keys and coffee mug.

"You know 'heck' means hell and the bad f word." Angela said innocently.

"I had no idea. Who told you that?" Harvey asked surprised.

"Grandma did. I've been living with grandma and granddad and they sent me here for summer camp because they thought I could do with a little fresh air. I don't think I want to go back." Angela said looking down and watching herself swing her legs just below the coffee table and stopping before the couch.

Harvey knew what losing a parent felt like because he still visits his dad's grave every year to share a drink with him. He knew that he should have moved on but he couldn't because his father was there from day one and when their parents divorced after finding out his mother cheated on him, he never once laid a finger on her and showed Harvey the difference between being sensible and being and idiot. How was he supposed to let go of someone he couldn't forget?

"How'd you find me anyway? I'm not exactly listing my address on Craigslist with a big sign on my door labelled 'This is the house of HARVEY SPECTER. I want you to live here under the condition you wear a walrus costume for two hours a day.'" Harvey asked out of curiosity.

"You learn a lot from the internet." Angela said shrugging.

"How'd you get from the airport to my place?" Harvey asked.

"Taxi. Paid the gentleman handsomely, he looked like Chris Evans…..he was hot." Angela said giggling.

 _Jesus Christ_ , Harvey thought. When he was eight years old he was playing with crayons or something, but he couldn't remember as far back as 30 years ago which made him feel old.

"You know you can't stay here Angela." Harvey said softly trying not to break Angela's heart.

Angela's eye looked suddenly worried with her eyes starting to swell up. "I've already cancelled my room at camp. I've haven't got anything else to go."

"I don't think it'd be a good idea. Your grandma and granddad would have problems-"

And then Angela's lip started to pout which sent a signal to Harvey's brain which told him that he was starting to be an asshole with the last thing he would wanted to do is make a kid cry. Not just any kid, his brother's kid, she practically shared the same blood.

"Please. My daddy...You remind me of him. My mom used to show us VCR's of him..." Angela said as she lip was now quivering. "One of the last things I ever saw of him was leaving my mother the night he died. He kissed my mother telling her he'd be back. But we all know what happened that night." Angela said, her hands now on her face trying to stop tears from forming.

Harvey felt like an asshole now and because of that he went across the coffee table and sat next to her. He paused for a second and slowly placed his arms around Angela getting her to lean onto his body, her head leaning onto his shoulder.

"How long is your summer camp?" Harvey asked moving his hand up and down her arm.

"Seven weeks. All I wanted was to get to know you. No one talks about you like you are dead. But I'll forgive you for not visiting me if you let me stay. I'll leave even if you hate me." Angela said managing to say and sniffing a little.

"Ok then Angela. Seven weeks then." Harvey said sighing and closing his eyes knowing that he'd have to find a way of working and picking her up from summer camp without anyone being suspicious. He knew he wasn't going to hire a maid of some sort and didn't know anyone who wasn't free around the time but he thought about it later.

"Thank you." Angela said moving her hands from her face and smiling genuinely for the first time and he started to feel warm inside for some reason. It was as if she reminded him of someone but couldn't think of whom. It was most likely her brother because he remembered how much he'd smile like an idiot.

"Can I ask you something Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked turning her body to face Harvey.

"Uncle Harvey? Jesus that sounds weird." Harvey said muttering the last part to himself.

"What else do I call you, maybe James Bond?" Angela asked.

"James Bond would be great name to call me." Harvey said.

"But he's blonde and has an English accent." Angela said confused.

"You mustn't be afraid to dream kiddo. And James Bond never used to have blonde hair did. You haven't seen the older Bond movies. What do you want to ask me?" Harvey asked.

"You don't have to answer this but I saw a small mark on your ring finger." Angela said.

Confused, Harvey looked at his finger and saw nothing on his ring finger until he saw a little ring mark on it. He traced his finger over it and suddenly it felt weird not wearing his ring.

"So was there a Mrs Specter, Harvey?" Angela asked with Harvey catching that part of her sentence as she leaned forward eagerly.

"There was but that was a few years ago." Harvey said looking at his ring finger and then back at Angela.

"What was her name?" Angela asked curious.

"That's a story for another time kid, that time being not anytime sooner." Harvey said sighing and standing up. "You've got to be starving, I know I am."

"I am. Can you make me a Cuban sandwich?" Angela asked. Harvey turned on his heel and stared at Angela with his eyebrow raised in confusion at the girl's choice.

"You really eat Cuban sandwiches?" Harvey asked surprised.

"I love them. I know this one guy who has a food truck and he would give me free Cuban sandwiches from school." Angela said.

"Why'd he give you free Cuban sandwiches?" Harvey asked.

"Mom helped him out with a tricky problem and I knew his son from school so I thought why not?" Angela asked smiling.

"I'm no expert on Cuban sandwiches but even then I'd make damn good tasting food. The remote is by the coffee table, knock yourself out but not literally though. Oh and by the way I had a son too." Harvey said turning back onto his heel and walking towards the kitchen which increased her curiousity.

Harvey heard the click of the TV coming on and smiled, it was a while since he had company. He lightly brushed the olive oil onto the crust, placed a coat of yellow mustard on the bread. Then sliced roast pork, glazed ham, Swiss cheese, and thinly sliced dill pickles were added in layers. He put the sandwich onto the flat top grill and placed it on low heat.

He turned around and slowly opened the drawer where he took out a wedding ring box. He held it in his hands for a while staring at it blankly with rushes of little memories coming back with voice overs.

He flipped it open where and stared at his wedding ring. He took the ring out and wore it around his finger; it still fitted perfectly after marrying her all them years.

* * *

 _Harvey moved his head down and realized that Donna hadn't spoken to him all day. He knew that it was probably a bad sign because she usually something bothered her. He learned the hard way that if a woman thinks too long then be worried because they're ready to give a knockout punch out of nowhere._

 _Harvey stroked his hand through Donna's hair and twirled a strand of her hair around his finger. Donna's head then turned to face his._

 _"What's wrong? You usually don't stop taking which is weird because you love the sound of your voice." Donna said. Harvey couldn't help but smile a little at her face, it felt like a while since he last saw her._

 _"I should be asking you that. I didn't give you my heart and my life only to die of boredom." Harvey said stroking Donna's hair._

 _"Sorry about that, I've been thinking a lot Harv'." Donna said tightening her lips._

 _"You shouldn't do that to yourself Donna. You create problems that never existed and they inject your way of thinking. It's why ideas are the worst parasites in the world, they don't die." Harvey said._

 _"I can't help it even if I wanted." Donna said frustratingly blowing a hair strand from her forehead._

 _"What's been bothering you?" Harvey asked sounding concerned as he twirled a finger around a stand of her hair._

 _"If I told you then you'd think differently. And I can't risk of letting that happen" Donna said shyly and looking down at the floor._

 _"Why would I think different of you Don-"_

 _"-I don't want to change that. Not one bit Harv'." Donna said with a hint of worry in her voice._

 _"We've known each other for years, Donna. Nothing you tell me will surprise me. I know you almost like the back of my hand." Harvey whispered reassuringly. Donna hesitated for a moment as she tried to find her words. She moved got of Harvey's lap and sat up looking down at the floor._

 _Harvey got up slowly and leaned next to Donna and putting an arm around her._

 _"Donna. What's wrong? You know you can tell me." He said worryingly moving his hand up and down his arm._

 _"I don't want to tell. That's what I want Harv'" Donna said._

 _"Donna, you've gotta-"_

 _"I want a baby." Donna said interrupting him and letting out a shaky breath. Harvey paused for a moment attempting to process the words that came out of her mouth._

 _"A baby?" Harvey asked trying to get a conformation that he heard her right._

 _"I keep having dreams of us having kids and we're all happy like a family. It was so vivid like a vision from God and….I can't describe how beautiful it was." Donna said trying to regain her confidence but struggling to compose herself._

 _"It's a big responsibility. We both can't work and raise a kid Donna." Harvey said moving arm up and down Donna's arm as she leaned her head onto her arm._

 _"Of course we can, I'll give up working." Donna said looking up at Harvey._

 _"Donna, I'm not sure I'm alright with that. You remember the last time you did that?" Harvey asked moving a strand of hair from Donna's face and tucking it behind her ear who looked back down._

 _"You're right...It's stupid. What was I thinking?" Donna asked trying to fight back her tears._

 _"Look into my eyes and don't stop talking." Harvey whispered._

 _"I can't even look at you now. I'm too shy to look you in the eye." Donna whispered. Harvey moved his finger under Donna's chin and lifted her face to look at his, him staring at her brown eyes that were almost red from the tears. He wasn't used to her being this emotional, and he wasn't sure he was ever going to see her this emotional either. It was too unnatural for her._

 _"How long have we been married for Donna?" Harvey asked reaching for Donna's hand and fiddling with her ring on her finger._

 _"Almost two years. Funny how time flies." Donna said with a small smile threatening from the corner of her mouth as she looked at her ring and then back up to Harvey._

 _Harvey couldn't help but grab Donna's face in his hands and wipe off the tear that was slightly scroll down her face with his thumb. Her skin felt soft and gentle and looked at her brown eyes and was transfixed into a fixed state. "You know it's hard not to look at you Donna and think how about how you can't be the mother of our child." Harvey said whispering._

 _He leaned forward and his lips touched hers and it stayed like that for a while because he accepted that they were going to be parents. They were going to be together and they now had a reason too._

 _That was until they were separated a few years later._

* * *

"WE'RE GONNA DIE! OMG THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING! I DON'T WANT TO DIE! FUCK!" Angela shouted from outside the kitchen door. Harvey's attention snapped to her as his smell was bombarded with smoke that was coming from the piece of bread burning.

"Fuck. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!" Harvey muttered turning the grill off and throwing the bread into the sink and quickly running the tap to stop the smoke from developing and turning the fire alarm on.

Angela pinched her nose and ran inside trying to breathe through the smoke. Harvey walked in and just gave her a carton of banana milkshake. He sat across her and was slowly absorbed by the couch.

"I guess I'll start cooking my own food now." Angela said putting her straw through her milkshake carton and drinking from it.

"At least you never ask for any Turkey."

Angela made a detour on her way back to the living room from the bathroom to have a glimpse at Uncle Harvey's place. She saw a sleek black music case on near Uncle Harvey's doorway and skipped to it. There were all kinds of music…from Huey Lewis and the News to Phil Collins. But there wasn't any Katy Perry or Queen which upset her a little.

Angela secretly made plan to find the mysterious extra Specter family member and try to figure out where he lived which she found out from the information hidden away from her whilst he went inside Harvey's room when he was busy burning the sandwich.

Since Uncle Harvey was still watching TV and his back was facing away from hers, she tiptoed to the first door by the kitchen. The first door on the left was locked. The second was the bathroom she'd just come out from. She decided not to look at the other doors just in case Harvey would suspect so she just went back inside the bathroom. Angela studied herself in the mirror and thought that she should comb through her hair with her fingers and re-tucked the ends of her shirt into her skirt before brushing off the front of it. Uncle Harvey looked neat and tidy and she looked like a mess, she knew she'd look like one because she spent most of her day travelling but it was the least she could do.

* * *

 _Donna sat on the couch with her arms crossed in front of her chest pouting._

 _"Please," Donna begged again, "Don't you want to pick out cute little things to put in our nursery?"_

 _"First it's not OUR nursery, it's the kid's. And secondly...no I don't want to go," Harvey said simply, "The only shopping I like is for me. Can't you just order it online and just-?"_

 _Donna sighed and turned her gaze to the floor. All she wanted was for Harvey to go shopping and pick out a few things and didn't trust online shopping because she didn't trust the 3D dimensions. She didn't want to cry but, the next thing she knew a tear was trickling down her cheek. "Damn it," she muttered._

 _Harvey, who was sitting on the opposite end of the couch, turned to look at her. "Donna," he said with a small smile, "Are you crying?"_

 _"Yes, I'm crying! I can't help it Harvey! God, I feel like a fucking idiot."_

 _"I guess this is what pregnancy does to a woman, I'd hate to see what happens when you get fat one day. Come here," Harvey said with his arms wide open. "Come on." She looked at him and offered him a sad look before scooting close to him and letting him wrap his arms around her in a tight embrace. "I'll go shopping with you, under the condition that you stop crying."_

 _Donna's face lit up, "Really?"_

 _"Really," he said._

 _"I love you," Donna said before resting her head against his chest._

 _"I love you too. Even when you're clingy for sex..." Harvey smirked earning a smack on his arm._

 _A FEW MOMENTS LATER_

 _"Aw, look how cute that teddy bear is Harv'!" Donna pointed to a shelf in the baby store. She walked closer to the shelf and looked for a price tag somewhere on the giant yellow teddy bear._

 _Harvey stuffed his hands in his pocket and sighed. "How much is it?"_

 _"Twenty..."_

 _"Dollars?! Donna, that's crazy. He doesn't need a giant stuffed animal to show our love and affection. I could just sleep in his blanket and infuse my scent showing him who's boss."_

 _"I'm giving birth to a baby human not a cat. And did you say he?" Donna asked with a sly grin._

 _"Well...yeah," he shrugged, "I want to give him the best sex talk he'll ever have. And I want his to be a basketball player so we become multi-millionaires and retire at the age of 55."_

 _Donna couldn't help but smile picturing Harvey and a little boy standing in a fenced in back yard with a baseball and a glove and trying to play ball. "You're going to be a great dad," she whispered kissing Harvey's cheek._

 _"I'll consider that to be a success when I bread a man-version of myself." Harvey answered grinning._

* * *

Harvey prepared the guest room and put in towels, extra sheets and pillows of different shapes and sizes just in case she wasn't comfortable. When he walked out of the guest room she sat in the leather couch with her knees to her chest and waited with her Wonder Woman theme pyjamas and her toy bear who she called Rocket.

"C'mon Angela." Harvey said calling for Angela. She looked at Harvey and nodded as she walked towards the room. "Hop in."

She nodded again and hopped onto the bed as Harvey pulled the covers over her body and tucked her in like she was a VIP guest in a hotel.

"If you need anything I'll be next door. I guess sweet dream and good night then you know. Sorry I haven't done this in some time." Harvey said surveyed the empty air in the room. When he walked away, Angela snuggled into the covers and turned her attention to her backpack.

* * *

 _"Donna, you need to lie down. Please Donna." Harvey insisted._

 _"I'm going to lose my mind H-HARVEY! Or maybe I'm crazy and you're crazy…just like me. Maybe we're both crazy like Nicolas Cage. You trying to send me to a mental hospital you asshole? I'm not going to faint again! I'm fine." Donna said exerting the bipolar behaviour that Harvey started to get in the past week._

 _Ever since she came home from the hospital he was worried that she would collapse in work again and was worried for the worst. "Donna," he stressed, "I just want to take care of both of you. You're giving birth to life. You're practically a Goddess which you're half way to being because I still find you sexy as fuck even when you're pregnant."_

 _Donna's tone relaxed. "Now's not the time to call me sexy, I already know that. You've taking great care of me. You give me massages, rub my feet and even cook dinner which didn't taste like battery acid mixed with diesel. I just need some freedom I guess."_

 _Harvey gave her a sad smile, "How about we have dinner then? We can go to the new shawarma restaurant."_

 _"The last time I shawarma I had food poisoning." Donna said annoyingly._

 _"Trust me, you'll be perfectly fine. I've been taking care of you, haven't I? Why would I risk the death of two people for the price of $29.99." Harvey said in his best salesman voice._

 _"I guess I'd better get dressed then."_

 _Donna got off the couch and headed to her room where she struggled to find something to wear since her bump was slowly getting larger. She shook her head as she stood in front of the mirror._

 _"You almost ready?" Harvey asked as Donna applied blush to her cheeks._

 _"Ready," she said turning around._

 _"Whoa," Harvey gasped seeing her in her black dress that flowed easily at her knees and hugged her baby bump in the perfect way. "Donna, you look fantastic. You perfectly embody me." He said cheekily._

 _"You're going to perfectly embody me when we come back." Donna smiled moving her arms around her neck slowing moving her lips towards his. When he saw his lips moving towards hers she moved her arms towards her sides and moved her face away. In defeat he looked at her lips desperate making her smirk._

 _At the restaurant, Donna and Harvey walked along the restaurant when Harvey felt a tap on his shoulder. Both of them turned back and were a little surprised when they saw Mike and Rachel wearing their fancy clothes respectively._

 _"Donna!" Rachel jamp a little and slowly hugged Donna making sure she didn't hurt the baby._

 _"I didn't expect you here." Mike said embraced Harvey in a hug._

 _"I didn't expect you here too. When did you want to taste shawarma?" Harvey asked._

 _"Ever since we re-watched all the Marvel movies at AMC. We practically stayed there 24/7 and by the time we were at Ant Man, Rachel got cranky because she never met Paul Rudd. But in all honesty she's been pushing me a lot because she's a quote on quote a foodie." Mike said with quote marks._

 _Dinner went on and Donna asked Rachel several questions about her family and how she was coping with the baby. When they finished eating their supper, everyone exchanged hugs and Donna promised keep Rachel and updated with any new changes during her pregnancy._

 _"They seemed happy; you don't think Rachel wants a kid?" Donna asked through a yawn._

 _"I think they want to enjoy their youth whilst they still have it and some people just don't think they're ready. They're practically kids compared to us." Harvey said stopping outside their apartment._

 _"But not when we're in the bedroom." Donna said biting her lip._

 _"You know I've been told I'm an expert in foreplay." Harvey whispered before leaning in and slowly kissing her on the lips._

 _"Sometimes I still can't believe it," Donna said resting her head on his shoulder, "This life seems too good to be true. I never thought I would actually get the chance and here we are... three months pregnant..."_

 _"We better get that nursery finished soon," Harvey said, "I don't want the baby to come early and be bored as hell."_

 _"That'd be tragic. Some say as tragic as me going a few weeks without sex."_

 _Harvey let out a low laugh. "Told you you're clingy for sex, and the men are called perverted. You don't see us doing naked marches in New York now. We should hurry this inside." He said opening the door for Donna, reaching for her hand and taking her inside. He couldn't even wait for the door to click shut all the way before he was kissing her neck, making her moan and working his way to undo her dress._

 _Donna's hands touched his making Harvey pause. She moved her lips towards his mouth and whispered, "Slowly."_

* * *

Angela woke to the sound of the phone in her bag buzzing against the floor. Angela forgot to call and let "the wardens" know she landed safe. Half asleep she crawled and reached for the front pocket of her backpack. She took the phone and tiptoed through the bathroom inside her guest room and picked it up. "Hello?"

A male voice began the conversation with a warning, "Angela. Do you know what time it is? You were supposed to call when you got in. We've been sick and worried."

"I know. I'm sorry….I had to turn my phone off for the plane ride and once I got to camp I was so excited I forgot to turn it back on."

"Don't do it again," the man warned. "You settled in ok?"

"Yeah, I guess."

The older man harrumphed, "Which chaperone were you assigned?"

"Um…..Coach Dunne. But I've got to go; we've already been told lights out and I don't want to get into trouble."

"You sure because you…mu—"

She smiled and rushed to get off before any more questions, "Love you, bye." All Angela knew at that moment was that she was in large amounts of trouble.


	2. God's Not Watching

_Harvey found himself walking along an empty street, accompanied by darkness and fog and didn't know where he was heading. After walking for a few minutes, he spotted street light that was lit at the distance but underneath is stood a woman with a trench coat and heels. He walked towards the streetlight as the woman turned around. As he walked closer he saw that the woman had red hair...it was Donna._

 _Slowly he increased his pace as his footsteps echoed along the street watching her as she suddenly turned into a building. He jogged a little to stand outside the building and saw that it was abandoned as he opened the door and walked in slowly._

 _Inside was dark and empty with the only source of light coming from the lightbulb in the middle as Donna stood underneath it._

 ** _"She's not real." Mike whispered. Harvey looked to his sides as he didn't see Mike._**

 ** _"She's gone Harvey. Gone baby gone." Jessica whispered as he took another step towards her._**

 ** _"You could never be a great father, you're a workaholic and always will be." Daniel Hardman whispered._**

 _ **"You couldn't even take care of your son." Rachel whispered.**_

 _Suddenly the whispers became louder as the voices whispered at the same time as he walked more towards Donna. He quickly walked towards her until he stepped into the zone of the light but as he looked at her there was nothing. He couldn't see her face and as he looked down her body the coat collapsed onto the heels._

 ** _He turned around and he saw Donna lying down on the floor sobbing._**

 ** _"Donna..."_**

 ** _"Get away from me. Look what you made me do!" Donna spat out as she walking towards her with her body covered in blood._**

"FUCK!" Harvey said getting up and screaming as he began to breathe heavily. He put his hands on his face and viciously wiped his sweat away still exhaling deeply. He looked at the time and saw that it was 07:30 knowing that Angela had to reach there for 09:00.

He entered his bathroom and turned the tap of the sink letting the cold water get colder as he washed his face from his sweat and turned the tap off drying his face with a towel. He walked out of his room and slowly opened the guest room and saw the sheets were all over the place. Her head ended up in the top right corner of the bed, one leg bent and the other hanging out the bottom of the covers. One arm above her head, the other completely off the side of the bed. He walked towards her bed and put Rocket next to her.

* * *

 _"Harvey! Harvey!" Donna screamed rushing over to Harvey who was lying down in the corner of their nursery and bleeding. "Harv, who did this to you?" She could see the blood trickling through his white button up shirt. His blood smelled like a smithy, like raw iron and earth._ _She ran as fast she could in her flats to get her cell phone and called 911._

 _He looked up at her with his half-closed eyes and croaked out "Burglar."_

 _"It's a boy," Donna said as unbuttoning his shirt and applied pressure to the wound so stop more blood from leaking below his pectorals, "We're having a boy Harvey." His eyes were closed and Donna let her tears fall freely._

 _The paramedics arrived within 10 minutes with Mike, Rachel and Louis arriving five minutes after the paramedics. "Donna?!" Rachel rushed into her apartment following the paramedics._

 _"He was shot," Donna said with tears flooding down her face as she moved away from him and let the paramedics do their job._

 _"He'll be okay," Louis said giving Donna a hug as well._

 _"Come on, Mike can drive us to the hospital." Rachel asked._

 _"No, I want to ride with Harvey." Donna whispered._

 _"I'm sorry but, there isn't much room in the ambulance when dealing with this type of injury. We need all the space to stop the bleeding and hopefully remove the bullet in the process," one of the medics informed her._

 _"Come on," Rachel said escorting Donna out of the room._

 _They followed the ambulance all the way to the hospital while Rachel and Louis tried to get Donna to calm down._

 _"He has to make it," Donna whispered once they were situated in a waiting room, "He has to… I mean… we're having a baby. I don't want him to live without a father."_

 _"He's going to be okay, Donna," Mike assured her as he placed a hand gently on her back._

 _The hours slowly rolled which only stressed Donna out as time passed. She needed to see his eyes with that special shine that only appeared when she was around and his cocky smile that she hadn't gotten so used to seeing. She needed to wrap her arms around him and he to tell her about they'd be counting stars instead of worrying about all the stress of parenthood._

 _"Rachel, the doctor's here." Mike said looking at the doctor coming out of the operation theater and approaching them._

 _"Is he dead?" Donna asked the surgeon bluntly._

 _"No," the man said in his English accent and black wavy hair as he took his gloves off and disposed them in the bin next to them, "It was a simple surgery, it would have been complicated if he had damaged one of his internal organs but luckily it was stuck along his ribs and he only fractured it. It'll take about 6 weeks to recover and I recommend he has severe bed rest.."_

 _Donna let out a sigh of relief and tears formed in her eyes again. "Can I see him?"_

 _"He's still under the effects of anesthesia and won't be wear off until tomorrow. I think you should all go and relax now. Come back tomorrow and you can all come." the man explained._

 _"But I need to see him. He's my husband." Donna said with more force than intended._

 _The surgeon nodded understandingly and door a deep sigh pinching his nose. His attention turned towards her as he saw the pain she was in. "Only for a few minutes."_

 _Donna followed the surgeon to the room where Harvey was recovering in while everyone else kept their place in the waiting rooms._

 _She stood outside staring at the door and finally congregated up the courage to go in. She saw his weak body and sat on the chair next to his bed holding his hand tightly._

 _"I can't stay long Harv', I wanted you know that I love you. I didn't know if you were going to make it." She looked at his face and noticed how pale he looked from the blood loss. "I guess if God exists then he's telling us that you'll live long enough so that our little boy can grow up with his Daddy." She placed her free hand on her belly and rubbed it gently. She felt a little flutter and at first she wasn't sure what it was. Then she smiled. She lifted Harvey's hand and placed it gently on her swollen abdomen, just below her belly button. "His first kick." She whispered kissing his cheek before the doctor arrived to escort her out._

* * *

Harvey made himself and Angela the same breakfast he made himself yesterday. He knew that he needed some originality because she's get sick of having the same breakfast everyday but smell was enough to draw Angela out of bed and to the breakfast table by eight.

"Morning, Uncle Harvey," Angela groaned stretching and lazily rubbing her eye.

"Morning," Harvey said setting a plate in front of her. "Orange juice or milk?"

"Can I have chocolate milk, Uncle Harv'?" Angela sheepishly asked.

"Out of chocolate milk and Uncle Harv'?" Harvey asked questioning him raising his eyebrow.

"I can't be bothered to say your full name, too much of a commitment this early." Angela said yawning.

"You're not lactose intolerant, are you?" Harvey asked pouring a glass of normal milk for her.

"Nope." Angela said taking the milk and slowly sipping it. "Oh," Angela shrugged and took a big swig of the milk, "No, I think I'm ok."

"Is there anything else you're allergic to? Peanuts….dust…boys..."

Angela pursed her lips in thought then nodded, "Vegetables, mostly the green colored ones." she smiled slyly at him, her chin still pointed towards her plate.

"I guess I can't even make you my special vegetable lasagna with extra cheese. The ones that Gordon Ramsay loves making. I guess I'll have to eat it all alone." Harvey said tilting his head and closing his lips but trying to hide his smile.

"I change my mind" Angela said smiling.

"You can't change your mind to what you're allergic too."

"I guess I'm not allergic to vegetables at all. It must be a miracle from Jesus." Angela said pointing her fingers to her forehead, chest and shoulders to form a cross as she smirked at the same time as he knew she wasn't religious at all.

"Well I don't know how to make lasagne, but I'll learn how to make it just for you." Harvey said smiling.

"Did you just lie to me after I lied?" Angela asked shocked.

"I did, who you gonna call?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"GHOSTBUSTERS!" Angela shouted earning a laugh between both of them.

* * *

Angela was ready by the time Harvey asked her to be by the door. She was wearing a blue sweater with grey sweatpants and black rain boots just in case the weather forecasted rain. Harvey knocked on the door gently which caught Angela's attention.

"Come in." Angela said smiling.

Harvey opened the door and his attention diverted from what she was wearing her suitcase and staring at her shin pads, soccer socks and trainers.

"You're doing soccer?" Harvey asked curiously

"I am." Angela said rubbing the back of her neck feeling a little nervous that he found out she was doing soccer.

"Well this is all news to me Angela. So let's go then if you're already dressed. I'll be by the door." Harvey said pointing towards the door and walking out.

"Let me just pack my clothes in my backpack." Angela said nodding.

Harvey decided to take a cab that morning because he wanted to know the shortest route towards the centre but it didn't stop the car ride being silent as he was on his phone responding to his text messages and she was reading Mr and Mrs Twit, not exactly the most relevant book but it was still Roald Dahl.

Once they were dropped off he walked her into the building and felt out of place with moms fixing ballet skirts and tucking bows on their children's shoes and little girls bouncing around like Christmas morning.

"I've got it from here Uncle Harvey," Angela patted him on the arm.

"You sure? I don't have to fill out forms or-"

"Sorted all the out before my trip here." Angela said smiling.

"Erm, I'll pick you up at 3 then. Bye then." Harvey said smiling back and awkwardly leaving.

* * *

 _It was Saturday morning and the plan was to go shopping for the nursery and Harvey thanked God when he saw thunderstorm and lightening overtaking the gloomy New York morning skyline._

 _"I was looking forward to shopping Harv'," Donna sighed as she closed the blinds and joined Harvey on the couch._

 _"You know we can go any other day," he said, "Why don't we start painting? We've enough paint to get half the room done."_

 _"Yeah, why not?" Donna said smiling._

 _"You might want to change out of those clothes though, you'll ruin your maternity jeans. You know, the same maternity jeans that cost $29.99!" Harvey said emphasizing on the price making Donna roll her eyes._

 _Donna changed into a pair of grey sweatpants and one of Harvey's old t-shirts, had her hair in a messy bun before joining him in the nursery. She watched as Harvey pop open the can of paint with the end of a flat screwdriver and pour it into a roller-brush bucket._

 _Donna tried to hide her smile. "You know we never had our Honeymoon?" she half-teased._

 _"But you told me you never wanted one." Harvey said opening her eyes sort of shocked she bought it up._

 _"It'd be nice if we have one you know." Donna said putting her head on her shoulder and staring at Harvey painting._

 _"We could go Hollywood like you wanted." Harvey said casually._

 _"You knew I would agree to this?" Donna said asking. "Naughty Harvey!" Donna said as she stuck a hand on her hip._

 _"I was hoping you would. Saves us from getting bit from a tsetse fly if you wanted to go to Belize or South Africa."_

 _After they finished painting they had a cup of tea and stared at each other in the nursery. She had paint on her nose and he had some paint on his lips and she had an idea. She crawled towards Harvey and slowly straddled his hips causing his to put his mug away from him._

 _"You're in some mood today aren't you my love." Harvey said putting his hands on her hips and staring into her eyes as she slowly bit her lip._

 _She leaned her head onto her shoulder and forced Harvey to lean against the wall. "I was thinking I don't need these clothes on," she whispered huskily as she grabbed her hands onto the hem of her shirt and began pulling it off over her head._

 _As the shirt began to reach her face showing her bra, he saw that she slowly moved it over her lips and he took the opportunity to put his hands on her cheek to kiss her making her yelp a little as she quickly threw the shirt off her face before he could get her lips against hers.. "Slow and steady Harvey." She whispered teasing her._

 _"Not when you drive me this crazy you tease." Harvey whispered back putting his hand on her thigh._ _Donna's hands moved down his chest and began unbuckling Harvey's belt. "You seriously going to have sex with me in our son's nursery?"_

 _"You're seriously going to question me in the middle of foreplay?" Donna asked taking his belt off and throwing it next to him as her finger began to unbutton his pants taking off the top button._

 _"You're right. Don't stop."_

 _"You've got some blue paint on your lips Harvey."_

 _Harvey looked at his lips and was about to remove it with his finger but Donna stopped him by putting his hand down._

 _"What are you thinking?" Harvey asked curiously. She trailed her finger over edge of the roller-brush bucket and smeared more paint over his lips. Once she finished she bit her lip and moved her mouth towards his ears._

 _"You've got blue on your lips and I've got red, let's make purple." Donna said seductively as they their lips slowly moulded together._

* * *

He returned at towards the centre at 2:45 making the mistake of leaving early because he thought there'd be traffic. When he arrived, Angela was sitting alone in the lobby with a cup of water and a half-eaten banana. The teacher's voice was counting over classical music in the big studio to the right. Harvey looked through the window where some parents were standing with noses pressed to the glass and saw every single one of the other little girls taking turns leaping across the floor. "What's wrong?" Harvey asked and sat by her on the bench.

Before she could open her mouth, a lady who had an uncanny resemblance to Rosamund Pike came darting from the back with wet paper towels in hand. "Eat that whole banana Angela, now." She placed one of the paper towels on the back of Angela's neck and wiped her forehead off with the other.

"You don't mind if I ask what's wrong with her?" Harvey asked confused.

"You're her…?"

"Uncle." He answered before Angela said a word.

"She had heat stroke and cramps during training. Angela wasn't very well prepared, she didn't even have her lunch with her." He stared at Angela and he thought that everything was provided for her based on the information she gave him. "What about the children who stay in the dorms and don't have access?"

"Their chaperones handle it for them which is why the children who stay in our dorms don't worry. Now you've got three options. One; you can either bring ten dollars a day. Two; she could bring a lunch with her or three you could take her for the hour at noon."

"We'll be more prepared tomorrow. I can promise you that." When the kids had come out of the room he noticed how their hair was perfectly placed in their buns and when looking at Angela's, her hair was all over the place. He that this was going to be harder than he thought.

* * *

 _Donna was lying down in her normal position in the morning, her head on Harvey's chest as he stroked her hair taking in her natural scent that made him feel relaxed._

 _"When my father used to be home he used to preach at the church we'd go. He never met a person he never believed had a sinner inside him." Donna said looking at him._

 _"Must have been great fun growing up with the philosophy. Guilty before even tried." Harvey said putting a hand on her cheek and caressing her face._

 _"If he could see us before we got married lying down next to each other-"_

 _"Men like that thrive on being proven right and we can't allow them to have that luxury, even if he's your father." Harvey said looking into her eyes._

 _"My mother was like your father, she'd go out and preach the word of God and she'd be devoted to the bible like a child suckling on a mother's breast. But she was a cheating bitch." Harvey said opening up to her as she was almost surprised to hear that about his mom due to him speaking religiously about her. "My mother is what the devil you father should be speaking of. Sex, pleasure...us here now, this isn't a sin Donna."_

 _"Will you make my case on the Day of Judgement?" Donna asked worried._

 _"God's not watching. He's busy not caring about the sick children dying or letting sinners and thieves hire liars to help them from wasting their lives." Harvey whispered back. "If he does exist he should be the one doing the compensating not you."_

 _"Don't say thing like that." Donna said replying quickly._

 _Harvey got up and set Donna on her side of the bed as she laid her head on the pillow. He moved his body so that he's on top of her and placed his hand on her cheek. "You're here with me now. Do you wanna be or not?"_

 _"I do." Donna whispered back._

 _"Good._ _I was thinking of names last night Harvey." Harvey said kissing her head._

 _"Yeah?" Donna asked turning her head to face Harvey._

 _Harvey nodded. "I'll tell you the names I like just tell me if you agree." Donna nodded and listened to Harvey read the names he liked._

 _"Nathan," Harvey began._

 _"All I think about is Nathan Fillion who I'd love to make love with because he's Nathan Fillion." Donna said shrugging._

 _"You never told me you'd want to make love with Nathan Fillion." Harvey said looking at her curiously._

 _"I'm never telling you the list of guys I'd want to make love with." Donna said smirking._

 _"I bet you want to me to fuck the shit out of you." Harvey whispered kissing Donna on her nose as she smiled back._

 _"Is that all the names you have?" Donna asked._

 _"How about Lou."_

 _"Lou as in Louis or as in Lou Bloom?" Donna asked._

 _"Both."_

 _"I'm not naming our son after a murderer. Sure Nightcrawler is fricking amazing but no! Can we just name him Jake after Jakey Gyllenhaal?" Donna asked giggling._

 _"No chance in hell. Not after that comment."_

 _"Asshole." Donna said folding her arms._

 _"We agreed that if it was a boy I'd come up with the names." Harvey said shrugging._

 _"I didn't know you'd screw it up." Donna muttered._

 _"What'd you say?" Harvey asked._

 _"Nothing." Donna said leaning up to kiss Harvey's cheek._

 _"I also like the name Patrick." Harvey said sighing._

 _"Patrick?...I love it." Donna said smiling._

 _"You do? So can we agree on Patrick?" Harvey asked surprised._

 _"Of course. Patrick, sorta like Patrick Stewart. Patrick Swayze, Patrick-"_

 _"Bateman." Harvey said interrupting her._

 _"Would I be a hypocrite if I said I didn't mind naming our son after a womanising serial killer?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow._

 _"So long as you don't drug me with cholorform and secretly call him Jake in the birth certificate."_

 _"I don't think I'd be able to drug you considering how much pain I'll be in after birthing you sexual-"_

 _"Too much detail there." Harvey said rolling his eyes._

 _"So Patrick Specter Paulsen it is." Donna smiling at the name._

 _"Why does your surename have to be last?" Harvey asked offended._

 _"Because I'm giving life to your sex fluids! There I said it." Donna said pointing to her crotch._

 _"This is just another chicken and the egg scenario and I'm not prepared to debate about what came first because no one gives a shit...I'm just saying that Patrick Paulsen Specter has a better ring to it." Harvey said shrugging._

 _"I guess it does sound a little better. Are we hyphenated the surenames?" Donna asked curiously._

 _"Would you hyphenate your surename Mrs Specter?" Harvey whispered putting his hands around Donna's stomach and rest his face onto her shoulder._

 _"Makes me sound like I've been swept away by Prince Smooth As-."_

 _"Language." Harvey whispered as they embraced into a kiss._

* * *

"So do you wanna talk about it now?" Harvey asked Angela as he pressed his brake pedal down and stopped at a red light.

"I don't." Angela said looking out of the window and looking at the side mirror looking at the traffic behind as she was lost in her thoughts.

"You know we're not going home Angela?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"We aren't?" Angela asked looking at Harvey confused.

"I don't trust a babysitter with you-"

"But don't you pay them to trust them?" Angela asked looking at him as Harvey drove at the green lights.

"I should but I feel like I gotta take care of you." Harvey said running a hand through his hair then looking at her. "So I decided to take you to work."

"What do you work as?"

"I'm a lawyer."

"Oh so you're a liar." Angela said looking outside the window again.

"I try not too lie." Harvey said sighing.

"So do you have a team of super lawyers that try to help the good guys and put the bad guys in jail?"

"Sort of...ugh, imagine me as Daredevil. But I'm not blind or a superhero." Harvey said signalling towards Pearson Specter Litt's car park.

"You're not as good looking as him either." Angela said giggling.

"You know when I was your age back in the-"

"The dinosaur age way before humans?" Angela asked smirking.

"- I wouldn't never said that to Sharon Stone, so I don't know whether girls mature quicker than boys but you I'm still trying to understand women. The day a woman becomes President then we're all screwed because we'll have intense negotiations with other countries run by females every month. We'll feel like a nun getting cornered." Harvey said parking in the space.

"So you're saying women are confusing?"

"You can say that again."

"So you're saying women are confusing?" Angela said repeating in the same exact tone.

* * *

"So what are the other floors for?" Angela asked as they stepped into the elevator.

"Other offices." Harvey said pushing the button for his floor.

"Uncle Harvey. That joke sucked really bad." Angela said looking up unimpressed.

"Wasn't mean to be a joke." Harvey said as the waiting for the elevator to come to their floor.

"Could have tried to make a joke." Angela said as the elevator door opened.

"I'm not Bill Murray. I wish I was though." Harvey said sighing and walking into the elevator.

"He was my favorite in Ghostbusters." Angela said smiling.

"You watch a lot of movies for someone your age." Harvey said looking down at him as the elevator door closed.

"You get surprised a lot for someone as old as you."

"I'm not as old as you think I am Groot." Harvey said leaning back onto the elevator wall.

"I'm worried you'll tell me you're 60. How many offices are there?" Angela asked as the doors closed.

"I'd count them but I'm too busy to count, the janitor probably knows you know." Harvey said shrugging.

"You mean the cleaning lady maybe knows?" Angela asked.

"You can have cleaning men too Angela just like you can have male nurses and male models."

"We had a cleaning lady in our school and she'd do magic tricks with her coin." Angela said smiling.

"The only piece of magic our janitor Butch does it make the place look spotless every single day."

"You ever wonder why American names don't have any meaning?" Angela asked.

"What do you mean?" Harvey asked looking down curiously.

"Like Butch doesn't really mean anything." Angela said making a point.

"Well Butch means when someone is manly but it's mostly said to women..so you can call Ronda Rousey butch but I'd never say it in front of her face because she'd probably knock my teeth so far down my throat I'd need to shove a throat up my backside to brush them." Harvey said as the door opened.

"I didn't need to know that last detail Uncle Harvey." Angela said looking up at him looking mortified.

"You get the image now." Harvey said nodding.

"Now I want to see Ronda Rousey fight."

"Maybe I'll take you to a UFC fight but I doubt they'll let you in." Harvey said shrugging.

"Anyway about the names. You know how, like, Butch doesn't mean anything. It's not like my name which is a Greek word meaning messenger of God. Butch doesn't sound like something that's Latin." Angela said as they both walked out.

"Not all names have to mean something. It's sort of like something given to us by our parents because they liked the name." Harvey said stopping behind the name of the firm.

"Even with a lame name like Butch?" Angela asked.

"No name ever given by a parent is lame. Oh and by the way you should look to your left." Harvey said pointing to his right. Angela turned left and her eyes opened wide with a smile. She walked towards the sign and stretched her neck upwards, Harvey behind her.

"Wow it's got your name on it." Angela said looking at 'Specter' and then looking down. "Who's Litt?"

"He's no Brad Pitt if you happen to think that." Harvey said signalling Angela to follow.

"Harvey, I need you here for a sec." Harvey looked at the corner and saw Rachel walking down the hall with her attention focused on the file in her hand.

"What is it Rachel?" Harvey asked.

"Is that who you're dating Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked curiously. Angela opened her eyes wide and looked down at Angela.

"No, she's already taken and too young. How dare you offend my taste in women." Harvey looking down at her.

"I bet that's how you like your girls. You're a predator." Angela said giggling pretending to show her claws with her hands making Harvey roll his eyes and smirk.

"I need you to look over this defense from Mike and OH MY GOD!" Rachel said looking at Angela and looking like she was going to have a heart attack. Her breathing frantically sped up as she started to continuously point at Harvey and Angela.

"What's wrong with her?" Angela asked worryingly.

"Now's not the time to be worried Angie. She's just extremely shocked, her husband should be here in 5, 4, 3, 2-"

"Rachel, what's wrong?" Mike said walking past Harvey and trying to calm Rachel down. Rachel pointed towards Angela prompting Mike to take a look and his eyes turned into shock too.

"Harvey, when..."

"Relax guys, she's not mine. She's my niece. Angela meet Rachel and Mike." Harvey said as Angela put her hand forward.

"It's nice to meet people who's shocked at seeing at eight year old. I wonder what'll happen if you meet me at 15." Angela said smiling. Rachel shook her hand as did Mike as they both looked at each other suspiciously.


	3. Why Do We Fall?

Harvey fed Angela two grilled cheese and chicken paninis and let her take a nap on the couch whilst researching the how to do a ballet bun. Angela was pessimistic about her first day of soccer training because she embarrassed herself in front of the other girls causing them to laugh at her and predictably gossip behind her back.

When Harvey finished cleaning the kitchen they decided to go to the store to get some buns and hair clips. She slid her rain boots on sluggishly and dragged her feet to follow him out the door.

"I don't think I wanna to go back." Angela said stopping in the hallway.

"You don't want to go back home or back to-"

"Training." Angela said as Harvey turned around to walk towards her.

"What?" Harvey asked surprised squatting down and putting his hands on her shoulder looking at her. "You want to quit just after one day?"

Angela shook her head, "I'm not ready. I thought I was but I'm not."

"You're not alone Angela. I'm here for you. You're a Specter and we never quit, ever. If you quit once then it'll become a habit and that's not a habit you want to adopt. Life is stranger than you think and sometimes people quit when they don't realise they're inches away from getting their dreams fulfilled and they only start to realise that fact years after when they reflect upon what they regret and how they wish they could turn time back...Does your coach say good job to the others?" Harvey asked curiously.

"She does. I wish she could say it to me." Angela said looking at Harvey.

"Angela, what you have to remember is that the two most harmful words in the English dictionary is good job. You really think that they're better than you just because your coach says good job? Now those girls are going to think that they're better than you but YOU know that the only time you deserve someone saying good job is when you do everything perfectly which doesn't easily happen. Any idiot can move kick a ball towards the goal and keep the people around you in tempo to your play. It's about pushing yourself beyond what's expected of you. And I believe that is a necessity. Saying good job is removing the world of its next Diego Maradona, Pele, Lionel Messi, Cristiano Ronaldo, David Beckham, Marta, Alexa Morgan etc. You gotta tell yourself that if you struggle now, you will live the rest of your life as a champion. Capiche?" Harvey asked touching both of Angela's shoulder.

She nodded confidently, the fire and fortitude shooting back to her eyes, "Capache."

"Now, I suppose we can take that frown and turn it into a smile…" Harvey said feeling relieved and enlightened at the sight of Angela's grin returning.

* * *

 _Harvey flipped the lamp on that rested on the nightstand and pulled the covers back so he could see what was going on. "Fuck," he said shaking her, "Donna, wake up."_

 _Donna squeaked and slowly her eyes opened. "What?"_

 _"I think your water just broke," he informed her._

 _Donna looked down at the wet sheets and her wet pajama bottoms and then looked back up with a panic stricken look on her face. "I'm only six months… I… we-what do we do?"_

 _"Stay calm," Harvey said as he slipped into a pair of jeans, "we're going to hospital. You in pain?"_

 _"Should I be….No," Donna answered, "Or I wasn't…"_

 _"What does that mean?" Harvey asked._

 _"It's just a small cramp…"_

 _By the time they got to the hospital Donna was feeling a bit more pain and she was freaking out about how early this was all happening. They made their way to the maternity ward where Donna's gynaecologist, Dr. Elkins, was waiting for them._

 _"Okay Donna," Dr. Elkins began, "I'm going to have to check your cervix. I need to see if you're already dilated."_

 _Donna nodded and quickly stripped of her clothes and into the hospital gown. She climbed onto the bed and let Dr. Elkins do what was needed to be done. "It looks like I'm gonna have to get you hooked up to an IV with medicine to stop the labouring process."_

 _"Harvey," Donna whispered holding Harvey's hand when Dr. Elkins had left the room to get the medicine, "I'm scared…"_

 _"It's going to be okay, Donna. She's going to stop the contractions and everything will be fine. Our baby has both of our genes. It'll fight to survive."_

 _"Alright, Donna," Dr. Elkins said as she re-entered the room with an IV. She got the IV hooked up to Donna and then she hooked her up to a monitor so they could monitor her contractions._

 _"You should try to get some rest," Harvey said to Donna pulling the cover over her, "it's going to be a long night."_

 _"I'm worried…"_

 _"Right now the baby is fine. I'll be right here and if anything happens I'll page Dr. Elkins."_

 _"What if something happens?" Donna asked with her voice breaking and her tears flowing again that night._

 _Harvey sighed sadly and got up to caress Donna's cheek. "If something happens… then we will deal with it together, like we do everything. Right now everything is fine. You have to stop worrying yourself. Okay?"_

 _Donna nodded and Harvey leaned over the hospital bed to give Donna a kiss filled with passion. "I love you."_

 _"Love you too."_

* * *

The list compiled on Harvey's phone wasn't too lengthy but there was a variety of the same products and since Angela didn't know which one to pick time was slowly sipping away.

"What are we looking for?" Angela asked deciding to become helpful.

Harvey squinted, "Bobby pins. Bobby, short for Robert."

"It is?" Angela asked in surprise.

"Yup. Why it's short for Robert, I have no idea." Harvey sighed scanning over the different aisles looking for bobby puns.

"They're at the bottom shelf Uncle Harvey." Angela said pointing at the bottom shelf. Harvey looked down and squatted.

"Which one do you want?" Harvey asked.

"The one in the middle." Angela said as Harvey causally threw them in the trolley in which Angela sat in the toddler's seat.

"Ok claw clips? Done. Bobby pins, done. Ponytail holders, done. I don't know why we need all this? Women can play with their hair open, right?" Harvey asked curiously.

"But Coach Dunne prefers it like this. She's not one for excuses Uncle Harvey." Angela said looking around.

"Was she the blonde lady that told you to eat your banana?" Harvey asked.

"Yeah." Angela said shyly.

"Here's your soccer shoes." Harvey said picking out some Nike soccer shoes and throwing it in the basket. "What's next?"

"Hairnets and hairspray." Angela said reading off the list.

"Hairnets and…hairspray? Bloody hell." Harvey muttered to himself putting a bunch of hairnets in the trolley and staring at the colossal range of hairspray.

Angela tilted her head sideways to read a can, "Big Sexy Hair. Uncle Harvey, what does sexy mean?" Harvey looked around to make sure that no one else was looking around.

"It's when something's appealing to your eye. But you shouldn't say it." Harvey said.

"Why not?" Angela asked confused.

"It's not a good word for an eight year old-"

"Eight and a half year old-"

"…to say. Just don't repeat the word." Harvey said picking out the most expensive bottle of hairspray. "Does your coach allow USA soccer shirts?"

"She's fine because that's what we all wear anyway. Why?" Angela asked narrowing her eyes at him. She took the trolley towards the soccer shirt section and Angela looked around.

"Well let's just say something caught my eye." Harvey said picking out an Alexa Morgan USA soccer shirt that was worn during the Women's World Cup that they recently won.

"You'd get me that? I don't think I deserve it." Angela said slightly embarrassed.

"A rule I always tell myself if give yourself a present every day." Harvey said putting in inside the trolley which got Angela very excited from the inside.

Next, they went to the grocery to get her cereals, fruits and per request of Angela he bought chilli flavoured Doritos. The buggy got filled with several other small snack packages and packs of Mountain Dew, ice and sour patch kids and also bought some lasagne ingredients so he could make it at home. At the end of the shopping trip, they both held so many bags you couldn't see her face if you stood in front of her.

"Wanna help me make the lasagne you wanted?" Harvey asked placing the bags on the kitchen floor.

"Remember the last time you tried to cook?" Angela asked placing her bags onto the floor.

"I won't kill you...on purpose." Harvey said gathering the ingredients and placing the on the kitchen counter.

"As long as the food tastes good." Angela said as Harvey took out a chopping board.

"Pass me an onion, garlic clove, aubergine, red pepper, 8 plum tomatoes-"

"Slow down Uncle Harvey." Angela whined as she barely could hold the ingrediants in her small hands and placed them on Harvey's chopping board.

"Want me to carry on?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"Slowly, I'm not a machine...or Wall E." Angela said doing her Wall E impression.

"Not bad kiddo. Not a bad impression. Now get me passanta, lasagne sheets, half-fat crème fraîche." Harvey said in a French accent.

"You sound like you've got a cold." Angela said handing him the rest of the ingredients.

"That's the secret to a good French accent. That and loving bread and-"

"Kissing women." Angela said handing him the grated parmesan. "Like they call Paris the city of love but in France they call French kissing 'English kissing'." She said as started to chop the ingredients.

"I didn't know that. Where'd you pull that one from?" Harvey asked placing the vegetables in a shallow tin and adding 2 tablespoon of oil.

"Uber Facts." Angela said smiling.

"You know the simplest of ideas can earn you million of money. I mean who knew a bunch of useless facts or 7 second vines would earn you billions of dollars." Harvey said heating the oven to 190C/fan 170C/gas 5 and setting the shallow tin of oil and vegetables for 35 mins until it was lightly charred.

"That's why they're geniuses!" Angela said like it was stating the obvious.

"Or because they never gave up, something you need to do if you wanna be a soccer player. You wanna be a soccer player, right?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"That's what the dream is." Angela said smiling.

"Why do we fall Angela?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"So we can learn to pick ourselves up." Angela said as Harvey smiled.

After Angela finished her lasagne to which she began to devour the plate like Cookie Monster would devour a plate of cookies he decided to draw her up a bath. He looked at her Head and Shoulders shampoo reading it and once he was satisfied he closed the tap and placed her shampoo on the stand.

"Angela, bath's ready." Harvey said as he began took her Frozen lunchbox and opened it to place mountain dew, sweets and someone of the lasagne in a container with a fork at the side.

He sighed as he walked to the couch and heard Angela walking inside her room. He turned the TV on as he drifted to sleep.

* * *

 _Harvey walked into his hotel room and saw that Donna wasn't there which made him feel a little dumb because he held white roses in his hand. He saw that the bed wasn't touched at all and the only thing that was out of place when he left the room was that the window in front of them was left open. He walked towards the window and looked out and his hands went weak as he dropped the flowers._

 _"Donna, come down from there." Harvey said as he saw Donna sitting on the ledge of the opposite window with her feet dangling over the dizzyingly atrium._

 _"No. I'm going to jump. This is what you've done to me. Donna said as a tear fell down her face._

 _"If you jump then you'll die Donna!" Harvey shouted._

 _"It's better then what you've done to me. You made me feel dead." Donna said looking down and closing her eyes to take in the wind._

 _"Let's go inside and we can talk about this, please." Harvey said pleading._

 _"We've talked enough." Donna said as she kicked off a heel and watched it drop._

 _"If you don't get off that ledge then I'll jump instead." Harvey said as swung his legs out, sitting on the ledge opposite is wife. He moved his head down and suddenly felt a bit of vertigo as he started to breathe heavily trying not to fall down._

 _"I'm going to take a leap of fate." Donna said._

 _"You can't do that. We have a son! What am I supposed to tell him when his mother isn't there to take care of him when he wants her!" Harvey shouted trying to get her not to jump._

 _Donna closed her eyes as Harvey tried to find a way to reach her. "I can see Jesus. He's waiting for me down below."_

 _"DON'T DO THIS!" Harvey shouted._

 _"Take care of our son for me."_

 _"DON'T!"_

 _"I know you'll be there for him like you weren't before now that you'll be his only parent." Donna said._

 _"NO!"_

 _Donna let her body fall down as he arms were lifted like a bird as Harvey screamed after her._

* * *

"Fuck!" Harvey said getting up from the couch and breathing heavily again. He looked at the time and heard the bath still going which was strange because an hour had passed. "When is this going to stop?

He got up and went to Angela's room but before he knocked on the bathroom door, amongst the sound of the shower he heard her singing— "If you take a life, do you know what you'll giveeeee...odds are, you won't like what it is." Harvey smiled as she was singing the James Bond theme to Casino Royale. "When the storm arrives, would you be seen with the merciless eyes I've deceived….."

Harvey's hand floated down to his side and pressed his ear closer to the door.

"I've seen angels fall from blinding heighttttssss. But you yourself are nothing so diviiinnneee. Just next in linnnneeeee." Angela sang as she paused for a moment for the chorus.

"Arm yourself because no-one else here will save youuuu. The odds will betray youuuu. And I will replace youuuu. You can't deny the prize; it may never fulfill youuuuuu. It longs to kill youuuu. Are you willing to dieeee. The coldest blood runs through my veins. You know my name." Angela said as she stopped singing. "The name's Specter, Angela Specter. I like my martini stirred, not shaken." She said in a Sean Connery impression making him grin.

He only had one job which was to make sure she was having the best time of her life, and he thought that he was a satisfactory job so far.

* * *

 _Donna had woken up a few hours due to another contraction and now she was lying in the bed with Harvey trying his best to comfort her._

 _"Another one?" he asked when he saw Donna's face scrunch up. She nodded through her deep breathing. Right now_

 _"Have this," Harvey said lifting a cup to her mouth and giving her the straw._

 _Donna obeyed and drank the ice cold water until another contraction ripped through her body causing her to scream out in pain and spit some of the water in the process. He stayed by her side and kept pushing the hair out of her face and reminding her to breathe. He was just about to press the call button when Dr. Elkins finally came rushing in through the door with Nurse Thackeray._

 _"Sorry about the wait," she said as putting her gloves on and checking the machine and then focusing on seeing her cervix to see how much she had dilated. "Looks like you can expect a baby in a few hours."_

 _"So, how does this work?" Donna asked worried._

 _"We're going to have a team in the room during the delivery and once the baby is out they will take him to make sure his breathing. If there's a chance that he has any respiratory problems then we'll take him upstairs and make sure they're eradicated." Dr Elkins said assuring both of them._

 _"Will we get to see him?" Harvey asked giving Donna's hand a gentle squeeze._

 _"I'll hold him up to you as soon as I can. Now we need to get your ready." Dr. Elkins helped Donna get into delivery position with his Thackeray holding one of her hands and Donna holding the other. She was scared and nervous for the next part but, she was more than exciting to welcome her baby boy into the world. They waited until a team of neonatal doctors were standing in the room until they started._

 _ **A few minutes later**_

 _Donna did the same process with taking a deep breath and holding it for ten seconds. She tried to focus on the fact that her baby would be welcomed into the world at any second to get her through the pain._

 _"Harvey you son of a bitch, you got me pregnant!" Donna screamed trying to handle the pain._

 _"You know getting kicked in the testicles is more painful than a woman giving birth?" Harvey asked chuckling. Donna looked at Harvey and gritted her teeth causing Harvey's chuckle to slowly quieten down._

 _"I'd do anything to kick your testicles now." Donna said and let out a final lengthy scream._

 _"It's a little boy!" Dr. Elkins announced as she pulled the baby the rest of the way out and began suctioning the fluids out of his mouth._

 _Donna was smiling from ear to ear as he kissed Donna on the forehead._

 _"Why isn't he crying?" Donna asked panicking._

 _"His lungs are still a bit under developed," Dr. Elkins well-versed, "the sooner he was taken to the NICU the better. You can go see him later today once you're feeling a bit better."_

 _"Can Harvey go with him? Please?" Donna asked, "I don't want him to be alone."_

 _Dr Elkins nodded which prompted Harvey to give Donna one last kiss and promised her that he would make sure the baby was okay._

 _It was close to midnight now and Donna was more than anxious to see her son. She was able to talk her doctor into letting her go to the NICU as long as she stayed in a wheel chair._

 _"He's so beautiful…Donna," Harvey said as he wheeled her up to the fifth floor, "he looks like you."_

 _"Is he okay?" Donna asked smiling._

 _"He needed a little help breathing but he's fine, the doctor said in a few weeks we can take him home."_

 _Harvey pushed the wheel chair towards the window of the NICU and Donna couldn't help but cry tears of happiness. He was a little on the small side and the blanket wrapped around him seemed to swallow him whole but, he was perfect._

 _"Look at what we did," Donna whispered with her voice breaking off toward the end._

* * *

Angela pranced out of her bathroom in her pj's to find the living room abandoned. Realising that he might have gone outside of the apartment she went inside Harvey's house and explored. Harvey was a name that wasn't talked about in the family household. All she did was stare at the great view of New York City that she saw in the movies. She wanted to be here and knew it was her destiny.

"Ready of not here I come? I'm gonna find you and get you to go to bed." The light flicked on.

Angela jumped and turned around. Harvey caught her snooping red handed standing in the doorway with his arms crossed. Angela nodded without word and scurried past him as they both went inside the guest room. Once she settled onto the bed with Groot by her side she looked up at Harvey and smiled. "Thank you for everything you got for me today."

Harvey shrugged it off, "No problem. See you bright and early."

"Night." Angela said slowly closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep.

* * *

 _It had been two weeks since Patrick was born and he finally got to go home. Donna couldn't have been more excited to finally have him in her arms at all times. Harvey had called all of their friends and the rest and told them the great news. They all agreed to stop by and give their congratulations and see and hold the baby._

 _"This is your home forever, Little Guy," Donna said as she sat the carrier down on top of the coffee table in front of the couch. She slowly unfastened his buckles and picked him up, cradling him in her arms. "I bet you're excited to see your room, let's go have a look now."_

 _Harvey followed her down the hall and into the nursery that was finally finished. There was a rocking chair in the corner just next to the crib. There was also a white dresser that had everything a baby would need on top of it. "This is your room and your future man cave," Donna said in a soft tone as she carried Patrick into his room for the first time._

 _"I think he likes it," Harvey pointed out when Patrick began squirming and opening his eyes._

 _"I think he does too."_

 _Several people stopped by to see Patrick and hold him for the first time with the first ones being Mike and Rachel._

 _"Good thing he doesn't look like Harvey," Rachel said as Mike handed Harvey a gift wrapped in blue wrapping paper._

 _"He doesn't look like anyone yet, we gotta wait for his face to metamorphosis or something." Mike added as he handed Donna a gift._

 _"You didn't have to bring gifts," Donna said carrying them into the living room and inviting Mike and Rachel to sit down and make their selves at home._

 _"You know I can't wait till we have a baby of our own," Rachel said as she carefully accepted the tiny infant from Donna's arms._

 _"Come again." Mike said staring at Rachel as if she became a Satanist._

 _"We're going to have a baby one day." Rachel said assuring him._

 _"When you say one day, how soon or later are you talking about?" Mike asked blabbering whatever was on his mind._

 _"Sooner than you expect it." Rachel said giggling making Mike sit down on the couch thinking about his life making Donna laugh._

 _"So, when are you coming back to work?" Mike asked changing the subject._

 _"Don't worry about it," Rachel said seeing her hesitation, "take all the time you need."_

 _"Would you guys like something to drink? Water, beer, coke, bourbon?"_

 _"You have bourbon?" Mike asked curiously._

 _"That's okay," Rachel said as she stood up and handed Patrick back to Donna, "we gotta go meet a client and we thought we'd meet the little guy first."_

 _"I never really got used to the taste of bourbon. I thought I might try some and-" Rachel poked Mike in the ribs with her elbow which made him wince and hold his rib in pain._

 _"Thanks," Donna said as she fixed the blanket that Patrick was wrapped in. "See you later." She waved goodbye and once they were gone and sat down onto her couch and put her feet up on the coffee table._

 _"Mommy loves you forever and ever," Donna whispered as she kissed the top of Patrick's near bald head._


	4. Casablanca

"Ow…ow! That really hurts Uncle Harvey!" Angela said wriggling on the barstool as Harvey brushed her slick hair back towards his grip. The counter top was littered with their breakfast plates and the items out of her bun toolbox.

"You women do this every day?" Harvey asked with his hands feeling fatigued as he rested for a moment.

"I'm not a woman." Angela said turning her head to face him.

"You're on your way to being one." Harvey said looking down and nodding at him.

"Does that mean I'll have to wear heels every day? That must hurt the bones in your feet." Angela said turning back to look down at her feet and shivering at the thought of a broken bone.

"Men love women in heels." Harvey said shrugging.

"Do you love women in heels?" Angela asked smirking.

"It's not sexy when they walk like a retarded newborn calf." Harvey said smiling back.

"Uncle Harvey, what's a a retard?" Angela asked as Harvey closed his eyes wincing.

"It's someone who's mentally and physically slow. You know like Lenny in Of Mice Of Men." Harvey said relaxing a little as he knew it was a good example.

"That's just mean." Angela said looking back with her mouth open in shock.

"You're gonna have to get used to that a lot short stuff." Harvey said getting her to look forward and gathering her hair back towards his grip.

"I remember when I wrote that George Killed Lenny in the beginning of the book so that next years students get spoiled." Angela said laughing at the thought.

"And you called me mean." Harvey said rolling his eyes.

"You said women who can't walk in heels walk like retarded newborn calfs. What did they ever do to you?" Angela asked looking back.

"Got chased by one when I went to Cardiff." Harvey said massaging his fingers.

"Why'd you go all the way to Wales?" Angela asked curiously.

"Because one of my clients went crazy and ended up being a farmer." Harvey said shaking his head in disbelief.

"Anyway the reason why women do this every day is because we need to look sexy….I mean good looking every day." Angela said smiling as she carried on playing her game of Minion Rush.

"Society wants us to think that looks matter but to be honest all it does it demand people's attention. It's your competence that gets things done." Harvey said sighing.

"But you spend wayyy more time on your hair than me Uncle Harvey." Angela said raising her eyebrow.

"I don't." Harvey said in defence pretending to gasp making Angela giggle.

"I timed you and you took half an hour. I could eat two bucket of fried Kentucky fried chicken by then." Angela said smiling.

"Press play again. I keep and getting lost." Harvey said signalling to Angela.

"Trying to change the subject about your hair? I'm just joking Uncle Harvey. I love your hair like that. Makes you looks like someone in the 1920's when cigar's and bowties were cool. Actually bow ties are still cool and so are fez's." Angela said as she paused her game of Minion Rush and went back to Youtube to the bun tutorial. Angela held out Harvey's phone and pressed play.

"Thanks," Harvey replied. "I don't understand why you need a bun."

"Because my hair is long and sensitive and makes me tickle when I'm playing. People think I'm crazy when I stop and start laughing but you asked that yesterday Uncle Harvey. Remember Coach Dunne?" Angela asked looking at Harvey.

"Personally it's gonna look stupid on you when you play." Harvey said sticking his tongue out like he was creating a piece of hair.

"Personally I'm using to use my good looks to distract them as they stare at my perfect hair but then my inner Batman comes out and I kick their ass." Angela said giggling.

"Where'd you get your sass from? Your mother? Yeah it was probably your mother. Your father wasn't this sassy you know. He was sassy but he couldn't handle me on his best day." Harvey said thinking about his brother for the first time since Angela came.

Angela reached and held out a hairnet for him and tried not to make him too long in his memories. "You're gonna need to wrap this around it."

Harvey took the hairnet and wrapped it around the bun a few times; he then lined the bun with the claw clips then stuck the bobby pins in between.

"Next?" Harvey asked.

"HAIRSPRAY! HAIRSPRAY! BIG SEXY HAIRSPRAY!" Angela said as she automatically shielded her face as he sprayed the hairspray all over.

"You happy with it? Seems fine to me." Harvey commented putting his hand on his mouth and tilting his head to stare at it at different angles. Angela hopped down from the barstool and began to bang her head on the table several times. "What the hell are you doing Angela?!"

He lifted her head and looked at her with his eyebrows crossed looking at her like she was an alien that landed in her kitchen.

"Yup we're okay." Angela said excitingly.

"Is that how you check if your hair is in place?" Harvey asked curiously.

"How else am I supposed to check?" Angela asked.

"I don't know…maybe not killing your brain cells and developing amnesia or brain damage so bad you'll be in a mental hospital playing cards with other crazy bold people." Harvey said shrugging.

"Mental people are bold?" Angela said looking up at him confused.

"No not all of them. Like there's Hitler, George Bush….the guy that jamp from space." Harvey said thinking about it.

"Oh and Bear Gylls. I saw a programme of his and he peed on his shirt and started to drink it and put it all over his face to prevent himself from getting dehydrated from the sun in the desert." Angela said.

Harvey's jaw opened slightly because he didn't know how to respond. "Well I hope you don't do that anytime soon because you won't be dehydrated anymore. You wanna know why?"

"Because it's not that sunny today like in the Sahara Desert?" Angela asked looking at the clouds that were surrounding the blue skies of New York.

"No. It's because I packed you some lunch, I think you'll like it." Harvey said handing her lunchbox to the little Specter.

"But that's the least you have to do you know." Angela said copying Harvey's voice. She took the lunchbox and tried to open it.

"Uh uh uh. It's a surprise." Harvey said nodding and returned a smile.

* * *

 _Over the next few weeks, Donna had been getting really sick. She thought that it'd pass over the first week after she thought that Rachel passed it on it got worse the third week._

 _She got up the morning that Harvey had an early meeting in the morning and made sure that Patrick was asleep. She moved to the kitchen and started to eat breakfast until she suddenly felt nauseous, so she ran to the bathroom to throw up._

" _Fuck!" Donna muttered to herself as ran running towards her room as she took out a chart from her bedside drawer. She placed the chart on the table and stared at it realising she'd forgotten to take her pills when they had sex on both days._

" _Hey Donna." Harvey said opening the door and putting his briefcase on the floor. "I came back to check on you. Do you need me to get any medicine for you?" Harvey asked closing the front door behind._

" _Fuck." Donna muttered to herself and lying down on her bed. "Just a second."_

 _She heard the footsteps of his Calvin Klien Oxfords getting louder as she realised that the chart was still on the table. She quickly snatched the chart and placed it under her duvet just as Harvey opened their bedroom door._

" _Flu bug again?" Harvey asked giving her a sympathetic look as he took off his Cotton blazer and placed it on the hook behind their door._

 _"Not exactly," Donna replied nervously. He walked over to her sitting on their bed as he kissed her forehead._

" _You don't seem warm, you sure it's not a cold." Harvey asked picking her hand up and kissing her knuckles._

 _She turned her head away shyly and shook her head._

" _What's wrong?" Harvey asked concerned._

 _Donna took a deep breath and turned to face him. "I have to tell you something."_

 _"Is it bad?" Harvey asked._

 _"That depends." Donna said as tears filled her eyes slowly._

" _Did something happen to Pat-"_

" _No." Donna said as Harvey leaned towards her holding her hands in his._

" _Tell me Donna. You're starting to scare me." Harvey whispered._

 _"I'm pregnant again." Donna whispered back looking in his eyes._

" _Again? Didn't you take the—"_

" _I forgot to take it when we fucked. I don't know how it slipped my mind." Donna said now looking at him with red teary eyes. "That's why I've been sick."_

 _Harvey paused and looked at the wall beyond her as she looked at him impatiently._

 _"Say something," Donna begged, wiping her eyes. "If you don't want it then I'd be happy too-"_

 _And then his eyes lit up as his face turned into a smile. He turned to face her as he held her face in his hands. "Donna Roberta Paulsen we're having another baby!"_

" _I-"_

 _He put his lips against her as she began to relax and embrace his kiss as she kissed back as he lied down on the bed next to her._

* * *

 **Two days later**

Angela had no problem getting through her day. It was made easier when everyone wanted to trade Lunch that Harvey prepared every day as she felt like a rendezvous point. Today, she had Buffalo Chicken Wrap with large chocolate chip cookies and homemade banana milkshake.

Harvey and Angela fell into a routine in the mornings consisting of breakfast, him making lunch for her, helping her dress up, dropping her off, coming to collect her and going to the office together as they'd talk about random topics ranging from movies to women.

The children were let out of camp ten minutes early today because the Coach had a dentist appointment. A group of girls came panting and giggling out of the changing rooms. Angela eventually made her way towards the reception where the parents were waiting as she was surrounded by five or six other kids. "I'm so excited for tonight! Can't wait." Harvey heard an Asian kid squeal.

"What's so exciting about tonight Ann?" Angela asked.

"We're having a sleepover in my room!" Lisa said as Harvey saw her eyes sparkle.

"We're going to braid each other's hair and do nails and make huge sundaes." Mia said.

Angela tossed her soccer trainers into her backpack. "I can't wait!"

"No offense," Eva said as she pursed her lips in a bratty way, "but it's a sleepover for mothers and daughters and you don't have one."

"Oh." Angela said as her face fell. "That's ok." Harvey quickly walked towards her and grabbed her lunch bag for her, "Come on, Angela." He guided the child out with a hand on her back and ignored the polite waving of the receptionist and other adults. "Go ahead and get in the car. Buckle up."

He removed her backpack and placed it in the backseat while she climbed into the passenger side. He then marched to the woman once Angela's door was closed, "Hey can I have a word with you? One sec."

The woman looked back and looked at Harvey confused. "You know I'm married so why would you hit-"

"I'm didn't call you to flirt. Is that how low you think of men?" Harvey asked shaking his head.

"I'm sorry I just assumed-"

"That's your problem. You _'assumed'_ You see my eight year old niece over there?" Harvey asked pointing towards Angela in the car as the women looked at Angela staring at her then looking back at Harvey. "She grew up watching her dead father on VCR's which is the closest thing she had to a relationship with him. She also lost her mother and I don't appreciate the way your daughter _'assumed'_ it was okay to be treating her like she's filth because she doesn't have a mother anymore."

"Excuse me?" The woman reared back, offended.

"I get it that children need to express their creativity and their opinions because it's gonna define what kind of person they're going be but saying that she can't go have fun with them because her parents are dead and saying it with arrogance makes me think that their parents are either naïve or that they've rubbed off from them. You ask me personally, and trust me once you know who I am, you're gonna want to shut the hell up and listen to me when I say that I'd love to believe that you're a first time parent and you're just new to this. All I want you to do is take a minute to break down everything I've said, process it and think about the next time your daughter tries to attack my niece again. And if you're taking my words lightly then believe me when I tell you that I'll get your ass in paperwork until you decide to hang a noose in the middle of the room and decide to do what's best for business." Harvey said putting his hands in his pockets and looking down at her.

The woman opened her mouth lost for words. She stuttered, "I didn't—"

"All I'm asking is that if your daughter interacts with my niece then she does it with a little more understandingly and without the negative bullshit." He smiled, and marched back to the car.

Behind him were the words of stern scolding, "Eva, what did you say to that little girl? Were you being mean?"

* * *

" _I can't believe it. It's another boy." Donna said holding their second son in her arms as Harvey sat in the chair next to her bed holding Patrick in his arms._

" _What do you wanna call him? You still haven't settled with a name. And remember no Jakey!" Harvey said smirking as he looked at her._

" _I wanna call him Casey." Donna said smiling at their son and back at Harvey._

" _After Ben Affleck's brother?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow._

" _You mean the better brother?" Donna asked looking at him._

" _I'd disagree with you there." Harvey said looking down at Patrick. "I love the name. That's your baby brother there Patrick." Harvey whispered pointing to Patrick. "You're gonna have someone to play ball with now."_

" _Did you ever think we'd have kids together?" Donna asked as Harvey looked at her._

" _I didn't even know what I was before you." Harvey said warmly smiling at her._

" _You really mean that?" Donna asked as happy tears fell from her face as she held on to the one person in the world that could make her feel safe with a simple smile._

" _Don't cry baby." Harvey whispered safely putting Patrick in his left as he wiped a tear from Donna' face._

" _Not even the happy tears?" Donna asked as a tear fell on his thumb._

" _Tears are still tears because people are great at hiding their true pain." Harvey whispered kissing Donna on her cheek._

" _So how many kids do you wanna stop at?" Donna asked smiling back._

" _How many you want?" Harvey asked looking down at Casey._

" _I don't know, how much can you handle?" Donna asked biting her lip and teasing him as he was sorta shocked at how quickly she can change her mood. It was probably the after labour process but he didn't know because women are as complicated as the physics in Interstellar travel._

" _Not now, especially with our kids here." Harvey said looking at Casey and then at Patrick._

" _Wait till I get out of this place. We can let their grandma and grandpa spend time with them whilst I whisk you away to Paris and we can get to know each other better than ever." Donna said huskily as she giggled._

* * *

Harvey tapped Angela's shoulder and stirred her awake. Loud car horns and whistles got louder when Harvey appeared at her door and nodded for her to get out.

Her mouth hung open and her head tilted all the way as she stared at the Indiana limestone exterior, shown at Gate 4 and gasping as she read the leaders that descended above the gate.

"What are we doing at Yankee Stadium?" Angela asked gasping.

"I thought that you'd like to get your mind off stuff so I got us some tickets to the game courtesy of the great David Beckham." Harvey asked smirking.

"You know David Beckham? How? When? Where? Why?" Angela asked jumping up and down on the spot.

"Well let's just say I got to meet him through a friend of mine." Harvey said walking towards the stadium.

"Now you're going to tell me you know Michael Jordan." Angela said laughing sarcastically.

"Well I do have him on speed dial." Harvey said confidently.

"No way." Angela said shocked. "I want proof. I want to hear him."

Harvey looked at his watch and took out his phone clicking number 3 on his speed dial and waiting for him to pick up on the other side. "Hey Michael. It's me. I know it's been a long time. I've got my niece here who doesn't believe I'm friends with Michael Jordan. You wanna speak? Okay, her name's Angela."

Harvey handed the phone to Angela who screamed in excitement as she was pretty sure that her banshee scream gave him permanent ear damage. "I'M SUCH A BIG FAN OF YOURS. ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU TOWER EVERYONE ELSE AND SCORE LIKE YOU'RE SLEEPWALKING! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S YOU!"

After a few minutes of Angela obsessing over Michael Jordan they made their way towards front seats next to where the players come out.

"Thank you Uncle Harvey!" Angela said as she took off her cap that Harvey got her and hugged her tightly.

"It's the least I could do." Harvey said smiling as Angela let go.

"You didn't have to do this Uncle Harvey. I would have been okay with you giving me a Ferroro Rocher milkshake." Angela said smiling and putting her cap back.

"I think you'd want to look to your right." Harvey said smiling. Angela look confused but when she leaned over she saw David Beckham talking to Frank Lampard (former England teammate), David Villa (Spain legend) and Andrea Pirlo (Italian legend).

"David you busy?" Harvey asked as Beckham looked up at him smiling.

"It's been a long time Harvey." David Beckham said smiling and shaking Harvey's hand.

"Not my fault you're in sunny LA whilst I'm dreading here in New York." Harvey said looking around and smiling. "Oh this is my niece Angela. Angela meet David Beckham-"

"Andreas Pirlo, David Villa and Frank Lampard." Angela said shaking her head nervously.

"I don't know much English but I'm guessing you're a fan?" Pirlo asked smiling through his beard.

"I thought I'd never met a football in my life yet alone three of my idols." Angela said as he voice shook nervously.

"You wanna take a photo with them?" Harvey asked taking out his phone.

"YES! SIGN MY STOMACH TOO!" Angela said lifting her shirt as they all shared a laugh.

* * *

"I love pizza," said Angela, mouth stuffed full with pepperoni and cheese and olives.

"No way! I didn't know you loved pizza." Harvey said sarcastically.

"There's no better feeling than having a pizza box on your lap." Angela said chewing on her pizza.

"I'm guessing you loved your day?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"Love doesn't begin to describe it. I thought I was dreaming! Can you pinch me?" Angela asked as Harvey pinched her arm slowly.

Angela screeched like a banshee as Harvey looked down at her concerned.

"Did I pinch you too ha—-"

"IT'S NOT A DREAM! OH MY GOD I SPOKE TO MICHAEL JORDAN, PIRLO, VILLA, LAMPARD AND DAVID SEXY BECKHAM!" Angela said covering her mouth as she gasped.

"You have a little girl crush on Beckham?" Harvey asked smirking as Angela's cheeks started to turn crimson read.

"Don't you dare say anything about it!" Angela said looking at her.

"There's nothing wrong with having crushes. I mean I have man crushes too." Harvey said smiling and taking a bite of his pizza.

"You love men? Does that mean you're gay Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked shocked.

"No. It just means I have an appreciation for qualities certain men have." Harvey said shaking his head.

"I want to know details!" Angela said leaning forward.

"No way! My man crushes remain sacred." Harvey said leaning back.

"Just one. Pleasseeeeeeee." Angela said pouting.

"No!" Harvey said smiling as Angela sat back crossing her arms angrily at Harvey then smiling as she grabbed a piece of pizza.

"Look at it! It's bigger than my whole face!" Angela said holding the piece in front of her face.

"It might be bigger than mine too. What you think?" Harvey asked holding a piece in front of his face.

Angela leaned forward with squinted eyes and judged the man across from her, "Same size."

"My head isn't that big." Harvey said holding his hands pretending to sound offended.

"Well…minus the bottom corner of the pizza plus your ears."

He bit off the bottom of his slice and held it back up, "Better?"

"Perfect." After, she sat back and picked some olives off to pop into her mouth. "We should have pizza every night."

"Unless you want to clog your arteries, raise your cholesterol levels and risk having a heart attack-"

Angela smirked. "I know Uncle Harvey. It was a joke." She said rolling her eyes and pulled the stringy cheese that hung from her chin into her mouth.

Following a huge bite of pepperoni and crust Angela reached into her pocket and took out a notebook. "Now that we've known each other for a few days can I ask you some questions?"

"What for? Worried I might be a spy?"

"You're not good looking enough to be a spy." Angela said teasing Harvey.

"Did you know James Bond was going to be called James Secretan? That's as close as it gets to James Specter…I deserve some credit for having a spy-esque name." Harvey said smirking.

"Thank GOD they never went with James Speretan or James Specter." Angela said giggling.

"Now that makes me sad." Harvey said pouting like Angela did a few moments ago.

"I just wanted to answers for fun I guess. Maybe I wanted to remember what your favorite colour was or something when I go home." Angela said shrugging.

"I hope these are rapid fire." Harvey said cracking his knuckles and his neck getting ready.

"First," Angela took a second to sip her soda, "what's your middle name?"

"Reginald."

"James Reginald sound better than James Specter." Angela said laughing making Harvey give her daggers.

"Favorite color?"

"I don't know, blue." Harvey said shrugging.

Angela turned the page in her book and jotted down his answer. "Favorite animal?"

"Lions." Harvey said eagerly.

"Why lions?" Angela asked looking up from her notebook curiously.

"Because I'm the king of the jungles when it comes to closing." Harvey said confidently.

"Show off. Favourite actor named Tom."

"Hanks." Harvey quickly responded.

"No love for Tom Cruise?" Angela asked.

"Love the guy but Tom Hanks is a legend and Tom Cruise went a little loopy after he jumped on Oprah's couch. I still love him though…maybe I have a little crush on him." Harvey said winking at Angela.

"You want to Cruise with him don't you?" Angela asked winking back. "Captain America or Iron Man?"

"Iron Man."

"Booo!" Angela said pointing her thumb downwards. "Most overrated movie in the last 10 yea-"

"Avatar." Harvey said quickly.

"But I like Avatar." Angela said pouting.

"It was a rip off of Dances With Wolves." Harvey said shrugging.

"There's a movie called Dances With Wolves? Sounds funny, I didn't know wolves could dance." Angela said laughing.

"Trust me it's not."

"Angela looked through her list and stopped on one. Which superhero would win the Hunger Games?" Angela asked looking at Harvey.

"Batman. Because he's Batman."

"What about Superman?" Angela asked confused.

"Batman would beat Jesus Christ with his bare hands, next." Harvey said smiling.

"Gandalf or Dumbledore?"

"Gandalf. He died and came back to life so he wins instantly." Harvey said.

"Gandalf dies? But I haven't seen Lord Of The Rings." Angela said shocked and angry.

"But he comes back to life." Harvey said making Angela throw a pen at his lap and cross her arms.

"SPOILERS!" Angela shouted.

"I'm sorry. We'll watch it tomorrow then." Harvey said handing over Angela's pen to her.

"Both of these are on cable, which do you watch…Frozen or Cinderella?" Angela asked.

"Cinderella. Frozen can burn in the Sahara Desert and don't tell me it's a Christmas movie when it's set in July. The snowman can melt, Elsa can die of hyperthermia-"

"But Elsa's so pretty." Angela said pouting.

"Anna's better looking." Harvey commented.

"Uncle Harvey loves Anna. Uncle Harvey loves Anna. Uncle Harvey and Anna sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G! FIRST COMES LOVE, THEN COMES MARRIAGE, THEN COMES ABRUPT MISCARRIAGE! THEN COMES BLAME, THEN COMES DESPAIR, TWO HEARS DAMAGED BEYOND REPAIR! UNCLE HARVEY LEAVES ANNA! TAKES THE TREE! D-I-V-O-R-C-E!" Angela said writing her answer down in her notebook as Harvey felt his jaw literally hit the floor as his eyes opened wider than they have before.

"What the fuck was that." Harvey muttered to himself.

"Favorite movi-"

"Pulp Fiction."

"Favorite TV-"

"Breaking Bad."

For the next question, Angela dreamily smiled but in an embarrassing way. "What's your favorite memory?"

 _Casablanca._

Donna shyly smiling up at him through her eyelashes. Her smooth skin and bumps of her knuckles on the pad of his thumb like he was caressing her hand in real time, her perfect red painted lips opening to tell him words that'd stick to him till he died. "The moment Donna said I do and we had our first kiss as husband and wife. Sometimes all it takes is a moment to close my eyes, and I see that moment on loop. If the world were to turn black and white along with my memories …I'd miss the colour of her brown eyes the most when she looked at me." Harvey whispered as he squeezed his eyes shut so he could muster all his energy and put it towards digging up that memory and dragging it closer and trying to remembering every detail of her face.

Angela's voice interrupted, "What's your—" and his eyes reflexively opened.

 _Then Donna was gone. She faded along most of the happy memories that were left of her._

"I think that's enough questions for now." Harvey said getting up and stretching along with Angela as they left the pizza place.

"I'm stuffed." Angela said looking at her stomach and taking a wipe to wipe her hands and passing on to Harvey.


	5. The Angela Specter Show

_**Author's Note:**_

 _ **I just wanted to thank everyone who's read this story so far and reviewed it. This story has received a reaction that's far exceeded my expectations and I hope you carry on reviewing and enjoying it. There's something about writing a scenario with characters from the show and new characters like Angela and Patrick that excites me and the fact that people love Angela is a major confidence boost because she started off as a figment of my imagination and boom people love her like she belongs in the Suits universe…thanks everyone!  
**_

* * *

"Angela?" Harvey asked as he walked inside Angela's room as she quickly looked up to him and hid her notebook under her bed sheets at the same time giving a nervous smile.

"What's wrong Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked as she composed herself.

"I shouldn't have told you to stop your Q&A like that and-"

"That doesn't matter Uncle Harvey. I've got more than enough." Angela said nodding her head.

"You sure about that?" Harvey asked as he shut the door behind him and walked towards her bed. "It's been a long time since someone asked me a bunch of questions about my life I guess and I guess that moment got the better of me."

"You sure you wanna do this?" Angela asked taking out her notebook and flicking through the pages.

"Yeah, why not?" Harvey asked lying down perpendicular on the bed.

"I've got an idea." Angela said grinning.

* * *

The set up was simple, Angela sat in the living room with the coffee table as her desk, the room was almost dark but with a large light bulb hovering over her so you could see her face and table which could gave a yellow tint to the video. Harvey's iPhone was on the tripod as they intended that the room should look like something off the set of the Charlie Rose show.

Angela placed her mug of hot chocolate on the table and looked towards the phone and smiled. She pressed the button on the phone as the audience applause erupted from the phone.

"Welcome to the Angela Specter show! Our next guest hails from the big apple New York itself and is the best god damn best closers in the business….believe I've seen him close a door and it's amazingggggg. Everyone get up on your seats for Mr Harvey SPECTER!" Angela said as Harvey walked out pretending to wave to a fake audience but in silence.

Harvey looked at Angela crossing his eyebrows as she tried to clicked on the sound bar app several times on her phone until the fake audience applause erupted from the phone several times as Harvey walked towards her and sat on the chair across her.

"Tell someone to cancel Jimmy Fallon." Harvey said looking at Angela. Angela clicked the button so that the audience laughing sound dominated the room.

"Harvey Specter, thank you for coming here tonight. I know that you're an extremely busy man. I mean you have clients in England, China, Honduras, Denmark….even in South Africa. But we all know how busy you are with the ladies..." Angela said as an 'ooo' sound from the ladies came.

"I just had to order a taxi for the woman I had in my house. She's a promoter for Mexican wrestling and tells me that she can get me into a match if I can get into shape which of course I'm in because I'm a stud…she didn't believe me when I said I'd come on the Angela Specter show." Harvey said as Angela pressed a button to sound applause from the audience.

"Now I need everyone to be quiet because it's gonna get a little bit dark, a little but creepy, a little bit magical, a little bit mystical but you'll feel good about it." Angela said smiling.

"I'll try my best to answer as best as I can." Harvey said smiling as Angela took out her notebook.

"Now you told me backstage that when you were a kid you had a crush on Sharon Stone…"

"I did." Harvey said slowly looking confused.

"So I'm going to ask you, yes I'm going to ask him." Angela said looking at the camera pretending that it was the audience members. "Have you seen Basic Instinct?"

"Of course I've seen it." Harvey said smirking.

"Pervert." Angela said grinning.

"Basic Instinct for me was very great material when I was going through puberty and Sharon Stone is sexy, she still is and that's a lady I'd love to handcuff me to a bed and murder me. That's how I want to die…with Sharon Stone on top of me/" Harvey said as Angela's jaw almost hit the ground as she was lost for words.

"You need a therapist." Angela said writing it down in her notebook.

"I don't wanna pay someone to make me lie down on a bed and tell me what's right for me. I have my ways of grounding myself. Like hanging up posters or watching Arnold Schwarzenegger work out with baby oil all over his biceps." Harvey said nodding.

"If Chuck Norris held you captive as a prisoner in his secret evil lair how would you escape?" Angela said raising her eyebrow.

"There's no way that's a question." Harvey said getting up slowly and leaning his body towards her notebook.

"It is." Angela said smiling as she moved the book away from Harvey. He smiled as he sat back on his chair.

"You know what I'd say to Chuck Norris? I'd say 'you know what Chuck? I've had a good run, take me now or never' and if Chuck Norris decided to fight me one on one then I would rip out his mullet and break his nose but his mullet would regenerate and the powers of Jesus and God would ensue in him and he'd sneeze and I'd blow up." Harvey said shrugging which made Angela's jaw dropped.

"Why are you so weird?" Angela asked raising her eyebrow.

"Is that one of your questions?"

"It is now." Angela replied quickly.

"I'm weird because I want to be different plus no one else gets to know this side of me but I blame it on my childhood and Sharon Stone." Harvey said nodding.

"Everyone relates back to Sharon Stone." Angela said rolling her eyes.

"That's because Sharon Stone is bae." Harvey said as Angela's eyes quickly met his.

"Don't say that again…please." Angela said looking scarred.

"You get the point now." Harvey said laughing lightly.

"Maybe we should get a bunch of old people to say words like bae, swag so that teenagers find it stupid to say. I mean now people talk about is Netflix and chill…we get it; you have Netflix and you want to relax." Angela said writing it down in her notebook as Harvey laughed to himself hard. "What's so funny?"

"You're so innocent Angela. I hope no one tells you what Netflix and Chill means." Harvey said wiping the tears from his eyes.

"I'm going to google it right now." Angela said taking her phone and going onto Google. Harvey quickly took the phone away from her as Angela gasped.

"You don't want to do that." Harvey said shaking his head as he put her phone in his pocket.

"Fine. Next question is…. what would you create a TV Show on?" Angela said looking up at him.

"I actually had this idea a few years ago. So one of my clients happens to be Aaron Korsh…"

"You say that like I know who Aaron Korsh is." Angela said confused.

"All you gotta know is that he's a TV writer and producer. Anyway I wanted to produce that would last a whole year, twenty-four hours a day. I wanted to get 365 different producers around the world to each make their own twenty-four hour-long document of real time, capturing life. So it'd be people waking up, taking a long shower, getting a cup of coffee and reading the paper for twenty minutes, a long drive to work."

"Who'd wanna watch someone reading the paper for 20 minutes and talking about what an idiot Donald Trump is for running for President?" Angela asked crossing her eyebrows.

"It would have been sorta poetic I guess." Harvey said shrugging.

"So, it'd be like a National Geographic program on people?" Angela asked trying to understand his idea.

"Exactly." Harvey said nodding.

"I don't believe that you could come up with a show like that especially since you have the National Geographic channel. You wouldn't let me watch what was going to happen between the two gorillas who were in love." Angela said shaking her head in disbelief.

"They got married and kids, that's all you should know and you're right. My real idea I pitched to him was to have two stoners played by Zac Efron, yes I'm a Zac Efron fan, and Dave Franco and they'd play cops in a show called Mission Unimpossible where they'd screw up doing normal things like crossing the old lady across the road because she'd get run over all the time." Harvey said looking up and smiling to himself at the idea.

"You know what? I'd pay to see that." Angela said doing her not bad face.

"That's why I pitched it. Of course it never got picked up because James Franco didn't want his brother to play a stoner." Harvey said shaking his head.

"I thought you wanted baby Franco to do it?" Angela said raising her eyebrow.

"But James Franco played a stoner in Pineapple Express and I guess he didn't want his brother to do a better job than him." Harvey said shrugging.

"Sticking to the subject of movies, Ghostbusters or Back to the Future?" Angela asked curiously.

"Back to the Future. Easy."

"Favourite Back to the Future quote?"

"1.21 GIGAWATTS!" Harvey said in a Doc Brown impression that made the both of them laugh.

"Favourite Christmas movie?" Angela asked looking up at him.

"Home Alone. I can't tell you how many times I hid in my basement waiting for my parents to forget about me so I can come back downstairs, make some booby traps and help some guys break into my house. But with my luck they probably would have killed me, raped me and left my body on the kitchen floor for my parents to come home to my dead corpse." Harvey said in a rushed tone.

"Don't you care about not scarring me for life? I'll never watch Home Alone the same." Angela said as they paused for a moment as Harvey made it purposely awkward for her.

"You wanted me to answer honestly." Harvey said laughing a little.

"Starting to think that was a mistake." Angela said turning a page to find a question. "What'd you do if you were in your car and you were listening to some music and a guy comes up to you with a gun asking you to give his car?"

"I'd take out my Batman mask and wear it and he'd look at me terrified because he'd know I'd perform justice on his ass and he runs away. In reality he ends up shooting me in the head and I get thrown out of my car and then the paramedics find me dead with a Batman mask on wondering why." Harvey said nodding.

"If heaven exists what would you want God to say when you arrive at the pearly gates?"

"Getting religious here aren't we?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrows as he looked up to the light about thinking about it for a moment. "I'd want God to look at me and say as Morgan Freeman…'Harvey.'"

"Horrible Morgan Freeman impression." Angela commented.

"Anyway, I'd want God to say 'Harvey…I watched you.' Then he'd pause for a moment. 'I watched you…all your life. You're a sick psycho but you know what….come on in buddy! We all are!" Harvey said laughing a little with Angela.

"Scariest toy you've ever seen?"

"There was this one toy I saw when I was buying the Blu-ray for Interstellar. I was walking down the toy aisle and I saw this creepy doll of Harry Styles-"

"OMG I LOVE HARRY STYLES!" Angela erupted as Harvey let out a loud groan.

"He looked like his face was melted with acid." Harvey said as Angela calmed down and looked a little terrified. "First of all I hate One Direction. Secondly Harry Styles sounds like the name of a porn producer in a San Francisco valley and I'd never allow my kid to ever have it in the home. That thing might have been activated in the middle of the night and the spirits would come to life and it'll be possessed where it'll wake up and kill my entire family with a butter knife." Harvey said as Angela looked at him dropping her pencil in shock.

"Never say that about Harry Styles ever again!" Angela said crossing her arms angrily.

"Honesty is the best policy." Harvey said shrugging.

"What producer did you say he was again?" Angela asked.

"I said he was a por-never mind." Harvey said realising what he said to her.

"Don't worry, I'll check out the video anyway." Angela said looking at the time.

"How long have we been doing this for?" Harvey asked.

"About 15 minutes." Angela said looking at him.

"15 minutes? Damn interviews are-"

"What do you think of Katy Perry?" Angela quickly asked.

"She's hot. She has large…..erm features that can make a man feel warm." Harvey said laughing at himself as Angela didn't understand the joke.

"Have you ever shot a gun?"

"There's actually a story to that that I've got. My friend got hold of a gun because his uncle was a war veteran and we went out to the woods and we'd just shoot at the trees not caring. My friend shoots and there's no bullets left, he shoots it in the air and still no bullets. Then he puts the gun to his head and we're all like 'dude, don't do that'. He pulls the trigger and the bullet doesn't come out but when he shoots it in the air again you hear a boom and we're all like 'fuck, you could have died there'. We always talked about that day and how stupid it was and how if he shot himself in the head that day then we'd drag his body and leave him in the creek that day." Harvey said smiling a little.

"Wow, did that make you think of death?" Angela asked curiously as Harvey was impressed at how mature she was.

"I remember my mom explaining death to me about years ago; this was around when my great-grandmother died. I must have been four, four and a half years old. I was playing in the backyard and my sister had taught me how to spray the garden hose into the sun and see a rainbow. I was spraying it and I could see my great-grandmother standing there….smiling, looking at me. I held the hose for a long time and looked at her. When I took my thumb off the nozzle, and let the hose go, she disappeared. I told that to my mom and dad and they told me that I imagined it but I knew what I saw and since then I haven't been afraid of death." Harvey said leaning tilting his head and remembering it.

"I'm afraid of death twenty-four hours a day. I guess it comes from my dad, I don't know. When I was sitting in a plane, I was just imagining an explosion happing. The people would scream and I'd be falling through the clouds. I mean, no one knows when you're gonna die. I think I'm too negative." Angela said looking down on the floor.

"Any other questions you wanna ask?" Harvey asked.

"There's one more but I don't think you'd want to answer it." Angela said running a hand through her hair and looking down at her notebook.

"I don't mind-"

"You sure?" Angela asked looking up.

"Yeah." Harvey said nodding his head.

"Do you remember the first time you saw your wife?" Angela asked slowly.

"Always." Harvey said nodding and looking down as she could see the hurt in his eyes.

"Uncle Harvey, I shouldn't have-"

"I remember when I first saw her; I knew that I fell in love with her." Harvey whispered as he closed his eyes remembering. "And she smiled because she knew. We carried on speaking to each other and all I had to do to make her fall in love with me was to make her laugh but every time she did it just made me fall more in love with her."

"I think it's a tragedy when two people who fall in love with each other never end up living the rest of their lives together." Angela replied as Harvey nodded in agreement putting bowing his head down and smiling at a memory.

* * *

" _I guess this is something off my bucket list." Harvey said looking at Donna._

" _You walking with me along the sidewalk looking innocent?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow._

" _No. Us walking alone the sidewalk whilst you admire the night view with the neon lights whilst I push the pushchair of both of our kids….after leg day!" Harvey said groaning._

" _If you didn't want to push them you should off told me." Donna said stopping as did Harvey to face each other._

" _No…I love it. It makes me remember why we care for each other." Harvey said smiling as the wind blew around them in the warm night._

" _You're gonna have to do better than that if you want a kiss Mr Specter." Donna said blowing a kiss to him and laughing a little as Harvey smiled back._

" _I was just thinking…what are we gonna do when we get old?" Harvey asked looking up and down her body._

" _What do you mean?" Donna asked tilting her head and crossing her eyebrows in confusion._

" _When we get old and our children get too old for us will we walk down the same road side by side?" Harvey whispered._

" _I-"_

" _I think about it every day." Harvey said as Donna paused. She took a step towards him until their faces were inches apart. She rested her head on his shoulder as he placed his arms around her._

" _Of course we'll walk down the same road, one of us will need someone to lean on when we're not strong enough and I'd rather it be you than anyone else." Donna whispered back._

" _When you're not strong and we're still together then I'll help you carry on." Harvey replied holding her hands in his as he let her fingernails scratch the back of his palms slightly setting off the hairs of the back of his neck. "And I'll be there when you need someone to lean on."_

* * *

"Hey Angela." Harvey said leaning against the door.

"Yeah Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked looking at him as she placed the duvet over her body preparing to go to sleep.

"I've got a surprise for you when you finish training tomorrow." Harvey said smiling at her and crossing his arms.

"Don't you have work?" Angela asked curiously.

"I'll just tell Mike to do it." Harvey said dismissing the idea of going to work.

"What if it's an emergency that only the great Harvey Specter can solve the case and save the world?" Angela said in her trailer voice.

"For the last time I'm not-"

"I know I know. You're not Daredevil. You're not a superhero, or as good looking as him…" Angela said as Harvey gave her daggers. "…as good looking as him in them red glasses." Angela said.

"Nice save." Harvey said complimenting her.

"But you're a super lawyer, right?" Angela asked tilting her head.

"Yeah I guess I'm a super lawyer. I should get my costume ready." Harvey said turning the lights to her room off.

"Can I be your sidekick? I can be Judge Girl. I can be judge, jury and executioner and then hit them on the head with a wench." Angela said giggling.

"And I'm the one who need therapy." Harvey said crossing his arms and rolling his eyes.

"We're all broken people in an imperfect world." Angela said yawning and turning onto her side.

"Night short stuff." Harvey whispered as he opened the door.

"Night Super Lawyer." Angela said yawning as Harvey smiled to himself and shutting the door of her room slowly.

"I wanna go on the FERRIS WHEEL!" Angela said jumping on the spot and pointing to the large Ferris Wheel.

"You're not afraid of heights, right?" Harvey asked looking down at her.

"Are you?" Angela asked looking up at her.

"Erm—"

"Oh my god! Uncle Harvey's afraid of heights! Uncle Harvey's afraid of heights!" Angela shouted as he rolled his eyes.

"Game on short stuff." Harvey said as they walked towards the Ferris wheel. They sat in their cart, sitting next to each other as the ride climbed higher and higher.

Harvey looked down at the ground as it went smaller and smaller and his breathing starting to get heavier.

"The trick is not to look at the floor Uncle Harvey at all the tiny buildings or the tiny people that get smaller and smaller." Angela said as he looked at her with one eye.

"That's not helping Angela!" Harvey said clenching his fists.

"You're gonna have to look at something Uncle Harvey!" Angela whined.

"Or I can look at nothing and be perfectly fine without barfing out my 3 meals from yesterday." Harvey said at the ride went higher towards its peak.

"But look at the view." Angela said as she grabbed his face in his hands. He took a deep breath as he slowly opened his eyelids looked at the spectacular view of New York.

The towers and strongholds of New York were shooting skyward in radical and bewildering abundance, overwhelming in their sense of power and their colossal beauty, looking more than ever like some absurd fantasia out of a fairy tale.

"You know what…this isn't half bad." Harvey said smiling as they stared at the view.

"Maybe we should have got you a child ticket instead." Angela said giggling.

"I'm a man child…I still firmly believe in that and they don't sell tickets to man childs so I have to round up to adult." Harvey said crossing his arms and defending himself.

"But you look like 50 or something. You can't be a man child." Angela said looking at him.

"I don't look 50." Harvey said opening his jaw in shock and looking down at her.

"Now you're right….58 seems about right." Angela said feeling his face with her hands. "How many Botox-"

"I don't know anyone who gives Botox injections." Harvey said slowly putting her hands away from his cheeks.

"But you said that you spoke to Sylvester Stallone and he's had so many Botox injections he can't even smile without his face cracking." Angela said as the Ferris wheel started to descend.

"Doesn't mean I don't know his dermatologist."

"Everyone lies Uncle Harvey and-"

"You calling me a liar?" Harvey asked looking down at her.

"Maybe." Angela said smiling.

"Anyone ever described you as cheeky or-"

"I've heard people call me childish, girly, annoying but never cheeky."

* * *

" _Harvey don't you dare drop me." Donna said as she found herself wrapping her arms and legs around Harvey's body as he walked towards the coast of the beach._

" _I'm not letting go of you, it'll be all you if you drop." Harvey said as Patrick started to laugh from his pushchair with Casey watching. "Now when I lean you down remember to let go of your arms."_

" _Wait, that's not part of the deal!" Donna said as Harvey set foot at the coastline of the sea._

" _Too late!" Harvey said as he started to lean down with Donna's back facing the sea. She yelped as she let go removed her arms from his neck feeling herself falling down as Harvey quickly placed his hands on her back and lifting her so that the wave impact was inches from her back._

" _Oh my god!" Donna said laughing out loud as she tilted her head backwards seeing the waves slowly dying at the coastline._

" _You wanna go again?" Harvey asked laughing back._

" _I do." Donna said biting her lip as he was concerned…she gave him the look as if she had a plan._

" _Okay, ready or not. Here we go." Harvey said as he leaned down but to his surprise Donna applied pressure on his back using her arms as they both fell down in the sea making both of them wet._

 _Donna started to laugh hysterically as she got up seeing that both of them were soaked. Harvey got up and had a Cheshire grin on his face._

" _Now I'm gonna get you for real this time." Harvey said as Donna started to run along the coastline still laughing._

" _You can't tell me you didn't love that." Donna said looking back and ran faster as she saw Harvey speeding up._

" _You're lucky you're not wearing your shoes otherwise I'd get you down now." Harvey said as Donna laughed louder then deciding to run towards the push chairs of Patrick and Casey._

 _Once she reached the pushchair, Harvey stood in front of it as they both stared at each other with smiles on their faces._

" _You can't take down your wife with the kids here. They'll think you're domestically abusing your wife." Donna said as she tried to find a way to escape but knowing that Harvey's agility was going to be too good for her._

" _They won't care once I'm done with you!" Harvey said as Donna bit her lip._

" _Look there's an alligator." Donna said pointing to the sea as Harvey looked there for a moment as Donna ran to his left._

 _Luckily he anticipated it and managed to tackle her from behind as the both of them rolled over each other with Donna still laughing._

" _If you do anything wrong then I'll find another guy who doesn't want to get into my pants." Donna said as she saw Harvey on top of him._

" _You wouldn't dare to leave me Mrs Specter. No one can love you like I can." Harvey whispered._

 _They laughed as she rolled over and grabbed his knee. They started to poke and tickle each other growing rougher by the moment. They started wrestling soon after. He got the upper hand easily and pinned her to sand of the beach. His one knee was outside her legs and the other was inside. He stopped abruptly when he felt her skin on his knee as he rested between her legs._

 _He watched how her hands were flat at her sides. Her chest was rising and falling from the wrestling as his eyes moved down her body. He looked back up and saw her mischievous smile that made her wrap her legs around his back._

" _Donna." Harvey whispered as he scolded her looking around._

" _Donna." Donna said mocking his tone._

" _Donna!" Harvey said tilting his head._

 _He moved her hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear as they both closed their eyes and leaned their lips towards each other's before it started to rain._

" _Ah man." Donna said groaning._

"Guess God wants us to carry on at home." Harvey said kissing her cheek.

" _Sometimes God is a dick." Donna said getting up and walking towards the kids._

" _Why can't the weather ever be right?" Harvey muttered to himself as they quickly seated Patrick and Casey inside the car._

" _Did you enjoy yourself?" Harvey asked as placed the pushchair inside the boot of the car and closed it to look at her._

 _Donna took the opportunity to pull herself closer to him, standing on the tips of her toes to wrap her arms around his neck and gave him slow kisses along his jawbone and up his cheek as the rain poured over them._

" _If you wanted pneumonia you should have told me." Harvey whispered back as he kissed her neck, a small moan escaping from her mouth._

" _Asshole." Donna muttered._

" _I'm being serious…let's get in before this rain gets worse." Harvey said looking at her._

" _You know this is something off my bucket list too." Donna said tilting her head and looking into her eyes._

" _Trying to get pneumonia-OW!" Harvey said massaging his thigh as Donna's knee collided with his thigh. "That hurt."_

" _That was the whole intention." Donna said rolling her eyes._

" _Kicking me with your knee in rain in the middle of the car park trying to get pneumonia? That's real smart." Harvey said still wincing but with a smile on his face._

" _Are you questioning whether I'm smarter than you?" Donna asked as Harvey bit his lip._

" _What you gonna do about it? You gonna take me back to school and punish me?" Harvey asked smirking._

" _Let's get the kids back to sleep then we'll think about that." Donna said letting her arms off his shoulders._

" _And I know what you mean when you said that it's off your bucket list." Harvey said walking around the car to the driver's side._

" _Took you long enough." Donna said opening the passenger side of the car._

" _I'm singing in the rain. Just singing in the rain." Harvey sang looking up at the rain._

* * *

"How'd you like that Angela?" Harvey asked closing the door to his apartment.

"Loved it. Thanks for taking me." Angela said taking her coat off and placing it on the coat rack.

"I'll fix your bath." Harvey said as he checked his phone for voicemails and missed calls.

"You don't mind if I wash my face using the bathroom in your room?" Angela asked.

"Go on ahead." Harvey said as he listened to the voicemail and walked inside her room.

 **FEW MOMENTS LATER**

"Angela, your bath's done." Harvey said walking out of the room and finding Angela laugh on the couch. "What you laughing at?"

"You have old spice." Angela said showing him a red bottle of Old Spice.

"Yeah…so?" Harvey asked walking towards her.

"I bet you bought it because of that ad." Angela said grinning.

"They say that advertisement is based on happiness and I decided to try it and made me so much happier." Harvey said taking the old spice bottle from her and smiling.

"I've got an idea."

"I immediately regret this decision." Harvey said realising that he was standing in his bathroom naked with just a robe covering his lower body with the shower going off behind him.

"You agreed to it." Angela said rolling her eyes as she set the phone on the tripod.

"Why do I have to recreate the Old Spice ad?" Harvey said holding the bottle at her.

"Try to look as sexy as possible…and action!" Angela using her fingers to form a perfect frame.

"You're not Steven Spielberg." Harvey said rolling his eyes.

"Every frame has to look like a painting…and ACTION!" Angela shouted.

"Hello ladies." Harvey said with a grin and putting his left hand behind his towel as Angela laughing to herself. "Look at your man, now back to me. Now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn't me. But if he stopped using lady scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he's me." Harvey said with a smile and showing the Old Spice bottle.

Angela quickly ran behind Harvey as she dropped a scarf over his head.

"You're on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What's in your hand?" Harvey asked as he picked up and object from the floor showing the tickets from the amusement park. "Now back at me, it's an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again."

Angela paused the video and replaced the tickets with fake diamonds as she pressed record. "Those tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice." Harvey said smirking as he picked up the Old Spice bottle and not a lady. I'm on a horse." He said as Angela got on all four below him as he squatted a little and not putting any pressure on her back.

"You did it!" Angela said as she quickly stopped the video.

"I can't believe we just did that." Harvey said looking down at his bathrobe and back at Angela.

"You'll have me to thank when you have a career in Hollywood. Call this your audition tape." Angela said stopping the recording and saving the file.

"Maybe I should start in a TV series about lawyers and it can be based on our firm sorta like The Office…actually it'd be better a dramady." Harvey said smiling to himself.

"Let's not take it that far Uncle Harvey." Angela said crashing him back to reality as he pouted at her and then smiled.

* * *

 _ **I hope you all enjoyed that chapter. I guess this is the happiest chapter I've written because the end of the next one is a massive contrast. Make sure you review about what you loved and what I can improve on. All I want is for you to review below and let me know. And if you wanna read more then remember to describe to the story right here. Bye x**_

 _ **Oh and here's the Old Spice ad they recreated just in case you've never seen it**_

watch?v=owGykVbfgUE


	6. My Body Is A Cage

"One two, one two, one two. Faster ladies faster!" Coach Dunne shouted as loud as she could. She got 8 girls to form a circle around two girls whose objective was to tackle or intercept the soccer ball as the 8 girls passed it around as quickly and accurately as possible. "Give me some dummy's. Confuse both of them; use your imagination. Miri quickly to Alicia…now back to Claudia. Good…keep up that rhythm."

Harvey sat on the bench of the training ground as she stared at Angela as she concentrated fully on the ball and the space between the defenders. The ball stumbled towards Miri and she took three touches before almost falling but managing to pass the ball to Alicia.

"Everyone stop." Coach Dunne said holding her hands and blowing her whistle as the girls stopped. She walked towards Miri helped her get back up. She kneeled down towards her and wiped the mud from her knees and looked up at her.

"You took too many touches there Miri. Next time you gotta be quicker." Coach Dunne said as she got up and signalled her finger towards the middle of the circle. "Get in the middle, Claudia come here. Pass to Angela and you all start there." She said walking out the circle and blowing her whistle and observing them.

Claudia passed the ball to Angela who looked to her right but danced the ball around her feet managing to send the ball across the other girl's legs which opened Harvey's eye wide at how skilled on the ball she was as Coach Dunne clapped.

"That is what you need to be doing girls. It's great to just pass the ball accurately but give the people something to cheer about. Make the fans happy, make their inflated ticket prices worth paying for." Coach Dunne said looking at her watch. "And on that bombshell we're out of time now." She blew her whistle clapping as the girls starting making their way back to the changing rooms.

Harvey walked towards Angela who was suddenly called by Coach Dunne to talk to the side. He couldn't get a sense of what they were saying because by the time he was a few feet away she made her way back to the changing room and smiling at Harvey.

As Coach Dunne collected all the footballs and placed it inside the bag he decided to walk towards her.

"So how was Angela today?" Harvey asked. Coach Dunne looked at Harvey and smiled as she kicked the ball towards the bag and zipped it up.

"Angela? She's got great potential. She seems like someone who wants people to come to the stadium and let them enjoy themselves. She has a certain way of playing that allows everyone around her to play along her. The way she controls the ball, she treats it well and becomes friends with it. She's got great skill, pace, a wicket right foot, sort of like a modern Zinadine Zidane." Coach Dunne said walking with Harvey smiling.

"You know Angela isn't from here, right?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"I know and she's showing great character for her age. You know since we won the World Cup more girls and women have been participating in soccer and taking it seriously and I believe that this is our Renaissance. I know she's from London and I know the coaches from London especially from Arsenal who'd suit her style of play. I can write a letter of recommendation if you want me too." Coach Dunne said.

"That'd be great." Harvey said. "Wow, I don't know what to say to that."

"I guess you don't have to say anything. The world would be robbed if they didn't see her play on live TV in the next few years. Who knows maybe she'd pick to play for the USA national team and help us win more trophies." Coach Dunne said shrugging.

"Isn't she required to play for England because she lives there?" Harvey asked looking at her curiously.

"Depends if she has a dual passport or if she has or had relatives from here…I heard you talking to Eva's mom about her situation so I guessed her parents were probably from here. You know if she ever wants to talk about it or talk to anyone then I'm always here." Coach Dunne said looking up at him and smiling. Harvey stared at her for a moment and realised that she was something off with her but she was attractive…even without her make up on with was rare with women.

"You sound like you've in a situation like hers?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"You know what they say about coaching, right? Those who never do….teach. I never made it to professional because I lost my dad to leukaemia and my mom to a heart attack. It ruined me. I got angry too easily, got injured a lot and then I quit playing. Spent too years drinking too much and not enough thinking about how to sort my life out. Luckily I got my shit together and ended up teaching part time. Got my coaching badges and now I'm working for New York Red Bulls full time luckily. I don't know why I'm telling you about my life story but it's been a while since I last told anyone." Coach Dunne said wiping a tear away.

"It's okay, I'm used to hearing people's life stories as a lawyer and yours isn't a first and it's okay to be sad about the past. That's why the future exists; it's there to help us get lost in our dreams." Harvey said assuring her.

"Thanks. That made me feel a little better." Coach Dunne smiling through her now emotional state.

"You married?" Harvey asked curiously looking at her ring.

"I was, widowed." Coach Dunne said looking at her ring finger. "I still remember what happened to me after my husband died. First time I noticed it was a month after his death. They all begin the same…shortness of breath. I become lightheaded and I can't focus on anything anymore and it's all random. Sometimes when I'm driving everything becomes a blur and I have to force myself to pull over. I feel my heart pounding through my chest and the worst part is that I don't faint. I never do and it carries on happening." Coach Dunne said looking down at the floor and shaking her head."

"Wow, that's...I couldn't begin to understand how that feels. I guess part of me feels widowed with the way my life's gone." Harvey said looking at the ring again and then looking at the mark on his ring finger.

"Divorced?" Coach Dunne asked looking at him.

"With children." Harvey said running hand through his hair.

"That must have kicked you hard in the balls." Coach Dunne said as they entered the building and stood outside the changing rooms.

"Look if you wanna talk about this anytime then here's my card." Harvey said putting his hand through his blazer and giving her his card. She looked at the card and smiled shyly.

"Harvey Specter. Of Pearson Specter Litt. Sounds like you're doing pretty good for yourself." She said still staring at the card.

"I could say the same to you if you're still in the dating game." Harvey said teasing her and trying to get her to smile.

"What?" Coach Dunne asked looking at him shocked.

"I'm just kidding. I guess we'll just stick to being friends. I never caught your name. I just know you as evil Coach Dunne as Angela explains…don't tell her I said that." Harvey said looking around to make sure Angela wasn't listening to them.

"Rose. Rose Dunne." Coach Dunne said extending her hand. "And I'm not evil, just a perfectionist."

"Specter, Harvey Specter. But you already know that." Harvey said shaking her hand back as Angela came out of the locker room.

"Hey Uncle Harvey." Angela said running towards him and hugging his waist.

"Hey Angela. You wanna go?" Harvey asked looking at her and back to Rose who smiled.

"I'll call you whenever. Thanks" Rose said putting the card in her pocket and turning around as Harvey caught a smile from the side of her mouth as she walked towards her office.

"You got her number?" Angela asked almost shouting in shock. Harvey covered her mouth with his hand and kneeled down towards her.

"When I take your hand off I want you to speak slowly. Understand?" Harvey asked. Angela nodded as he slowly moved his hand away and walked towards the exit. "And I gave her my number."

"Why?" Angela asked confused.

"She seems like a nice person." Harvey said nodding.

"No one gets a woman's number just because they're a 'nice person.'" Angela said putting her hands on her hips. "That's like saying I love Cookie Monster because he seems like someone who loves food…you're being too broad."

"Let's say me and her have something in common and I just thought that we'd be able to talk about it and we can relate to each other I guess." Harvey said looking down at her.

"But she's an evil coach." Angela said.

"She's pushing you beyond your limit. Plus she's a perfectionist." Harvey said remembering her words.

"You're repeating after her now, there's definitely something going on between the both of you." Angela said nodding her head.

"You caught me Sherlock." Harvey said holding his hands playfully.

"No one gives up that easily. I'll have to investigate with Watson immediately!" Angela said pretending to look through a microscope.

"I'm not playing Watson." Harvey said shaking his head.

"No one hires a murderer to solve a murder case." Angela said challenging him.

"Clearly you haven't seen Silence of the Lambs."

"Silence of the Limbs?" Angela asked innocently that made Harvey shake his head smiling.

"Hannibal Lecter…..Clarice Sterling…"

"Oh from the TV show Hannibal? I thought it looked like a great food program but they didn't like the food and now he's trying to kill them." Angela said looking up and thinking about it.

"Yeah….that's what happened….anything else happen today?" Harvey asked transitioning as they walked away from the changing rooms.

"Coach Dunne thinks doing really good and that I should play a friendly against a team from Jersey and then a proper match against New York FC!" She explained it to Harvey, showing him the paper all children had to bring home on information about the matchess.

"Wow, that's great. Of course you should play." Harvey said trying not to put any pressure on her at all. He realised that maybe he shouldn't pressure her to do any choices because he started to believe that this might be a path that she could excel in but at the same time study for good grades just in case things don't fall into place but he believed that there's a silver lining in every situation which he just saw in Coach Dunne's life. "So what else you do today?"

"Dribbling, shooting, defending, passing like you just saw. Oh and I shared some of my m&ms on our snack break to my new friends."

"New friends?" Harvey took her lunchbox for her and stood while slung her backpack on.

"I made some news ones because I wanted to be with people that make me better. Plus Coach Dunne's put us in groups and she told us we have great chemistry with each other." She said as she saw Coach Dunne walking to her Mercedes waving at her who blew a kiss back not knowing if it was for her or Harvey.

As Harvey and his niece reached their car, a taller skinny redhead and a brunette and two blondes tackled her in hugs. "Bye Angela! See you Monday!"

"Bye Claudia. Bye Becky, Bye Miri, Bye Alicia." Angela giggled as she the five of them shared a hug as Harvey sneakily took his phone out to take the group hug.

* * *

 _"Shh, shh, shh." Donna said pacing around the room to stop Casey from crying._

 _Harvey put the keys inside their apartment door and opened it closing the door and expected Donna to come and hug her but he started to worry as she looked distraught with Casey in her arms._

 _"Where's Patrick?" Harvey asked looking around._

 _"He's in his room asleep." Donna said looking Casey and trying to get him to stop crying which began to get louder._

 _"How long has he been like this?" Harvey asked gulping as he began to get concerned._

 _"Since you left this morning." Donna said as Harvey took hold of Casey who didn't even look at Harvey as its cries began to echo the room._

 _"I don't know what's wrong with him Harvey. He hasn't stopped crying since and he hasn't stopped crying long enough to nurse since." Donna said looking at him as she felt herself go weak at the thought that something could be wrong with him, he was only a month old and his crying began about a week ago but began to worsen day by day._

 _"All right, shh, shh." Harvey whispered as he placed her on the table._

 _Harvey looked at him and his jaw opened with his face beginning to turn white. He felt his heart start to beat rapidly as he thought he knew what was happening to him as his stomach lurched. He felt like he was in a dream and he was screaming but he couldn't make any noise because he felt like he could pass out._

 _"Harvey, what's wrong?" Donna asked looking at him as she started to have a feeling that something was gravely wrong with her mind racing to the worst possible conclusion._

 _One of Harvey's knees went weak as she saw it fall onto the floor but with no sign of pain coming from his face._

 _"Harvey…" Donna said quickly walking towards him to aid his leg but Harvey managing to find the strength to go back on his feet._

 _"It can't be….no no no no no. We need to get Casey to the hospital now." Harvey said picking up Casey and taking him towards the door._

 _"What is it?" Donna asked with her voice shaking._

 _"Go the bedroom, get the baby's things and get Patrick too." Harvey said putting his hand in his pocket and taking out his key as she saw his hands physically shake and struggle to place the keys inside the keyhold._

 _"What's the matter with him, Harvey?" Donna asked fighting to keep her breathing in control._

 _"I'll tell you in the car." Harvey said putting the key quickly inside his key and unlocking the door._

 _"No, tell me now." Donnas said desperately._

 _"He's presenting symptoms of meningitis." Harvey said as a tear fell down his eye._

 _"What's that?" Donna asked shaking her head in disbelief but she knew exactly what it was._

 _"It's a viral infection of the brain, and a stiff neck is a common symptom. I can't be certain."_

* * *

"Uncle Harvey? Uncle Harvey?" Angela said clicking her fingers which woke him up from his desk. He got up slowly and saw Angela holding her teddy with her one hand and eating a hot dog with another.

"What is it Angela?" Harvey asked rubbing his eyes and yawning a little.

"You were asleep so I decided to wake you up. It's not your bedtime yet." Angela said worried. He looked at the clock and back at her.

"You're right and thanks for that. And you shouldn't eat with your teddy in your other hand. He might get dirty, here let me take him." Harvey said taking his hand out as Angela gave him the teddy as he sat it next to his laptop.

"Uncle Harvey, do you have a minute to talk or are you busy?" Angela asked biting her lip and moving left to right on her legs.

"Sure I got a minute." Harvey said looking at the time as she sat on the chair next to him.

"Uncle Harvey, what kind of stuff did you do at my age? Like sports and stuff?" She asked curiously.

"The only sport me and your dad had in common was boxing. He'd box less though, he got more of a kick out of soccer which probably explains you." Harvey said looking down at her.

"I guess it's in the genes like people say. But I don't understand it because I don't wear the same jeans as he did." Angela said looking down at her pants.

"You'll understand when you're older." Harvey said closing his laptop down.

"What were you in if my dad was into boxing?"

"Baseball." Harvey said pretending to hit a baseball in mid-air.

"You used to play baseball?" Angela said straightening her back in curiosity.

"Yeah. Had a pretty damn good average but broke my shoulder. Could have been a professional like your coach, instead I became a lawyer and look where that got me. Fancy car, fancy suit, nice looking house and an adorable niece." Harvey said pinching her cheeks playfully as she looked like she didn't want to be there.

"You can stop that Uncle Harvey." Angela said as best as she could as Harvey kept his fingers on her cheeks.

"Sorry." Harvey said taking his hands off.

"What was my dad like?"

"Your dad was my first best friend." Harvey said looking through the door and remembering Marcus. "We didn't have to say much to each other because whenever we'd walk into a room we'd feel comfortable with each other because we knew what the other was thinking about. We shared the same inside jokes; we remember when we fought and how we got over it within minutes because we were too close with each other to get mad. We'd wrestle with each other, dress up as Batman and Superman at Halloween and it was nice to grow up with someone who was like you even if he didn't share the same interests as you. No one will ever understand how important your dad was to me, you know, people come and go in your life but your brother stays with you for the rest of your life which is why your brother was a gift to me. I don't think I'd grow up half the man I was if I never had someone to share my craziness with." He said wiping a tear from his eye and looking down at Angela.

"Sounds like you really miss him." Angela said timidly.

"I do and I regret not spending enough time with him as I got older." Harvey said running a hand through his hair.

"I know this is random but is there anything you remember from your wife that bugged you?" Angela asked blushing a little. He saw her blush and he smiled at her curiosity.

"Yeah. Why don't you sit on the desk and I'll tell you." Harvey said patting on his desk. Angela got up and Harvey picked her up slowly and placed her on the desk so that she was looking down at him.

"Was it really that bad?" Angela asked.

"If you understood why then you wouldn't say anything." Harvey said sighing as he took a deep breath whilst pinching his nose.

* * *

 _"Mrs Specter, I feel like it's important to be honest with you." Dr Elkins said looking at her sadly._

 _"Isn't your job supposed to include you being honest all the time?" Harvey asked as she the doctor looked at his state. His shirt was undone, top buttons unbuttoned as sweat started to form from his face._

 _"He's going to be okay, isn't he?" Donna asked hoping she'd nod._

 _"His fever's gone up and he's not responding to light or sound." Dr Elkins said to her and Harvey._

 _"What does that mean?" Donna asked almost in disbelief._

 _"He's got enormous brain swelling and it's increasing." Dr Elkins said holding her hand as Donna felt her throat go dry and felt like electric voltage coursing through her from head to toe._

 _"How is this possible? I thought you vaccinated him for meningitis?" Harvey asked angrily gritting his teeth._

 _"Mr Specter this is a rare form of meningitis we've seen. There's no way-"_

 _"I'm gonna sue your hospital if he-"_

 _"But he's going to get better Harvey. You said it yourself, he's got our genes. He'll keep on fighting." Donna whispered as he looked at him._

 _"We've all been praying for that and you can't give up hope your little boy will recover, but you also need to know there's a chance that God will be calling Casey home." Dr Elkins said as Donna felt her heart would explode._

 _"No." Donna croaked as Harvey put his head down to try and not cry in front of her. "Harvey will think of something."_

* * *

"It'd be at night, midnight actually. I saw her looking up at the sky one night and her mind was wandering. She used to think about something that happened 5 years ago or something that happened two hours ago I could tell by how much she was concentrating. Or she'd think of something that could happen 10 years from now. Her mind was like a hurricane. It's a wreck, it's full of beautiful yet awful thoughts. That's maybe why we fell in love with each other, the fact that our demons complemented each other. Then it'd be 1AM and her mind would continue to wonder. The worst part of it is that I knew what took her to the wonder." Harvey said as they both sat in silence.

* * *

 _Dr Elkins returned to their room as she looked down at them holding each other's hand and then changing their attention to her._

 _"Where's Casey?" Donna asked looking at her as Dr Elkins dropped her head._

 _"I'm sorry to say but Casey….he's no more." Dr Elkins said timidly but loud enough for them to hear her._

 _Donna felt as if the world was rushing at her. Noises become very distinct and it made her head swim. Her heart rate began to soar and she became very aware of her breathing. Her hands felt like pins and needles and she felt a sudden tension across her shoulders with an intense bolt of fear that made her root on the spot. Their mind hasn't yet touched the reality that their baby son was now dead._

 _"No, no, no, that can't be true." Donna whispered shaking her head viciously with her bottom lip trembling as Harvey began to silently cry looking at how fast the her chest began to rise and fall._

 _"The virus got the better of him and-"_

 _"NO!" Donna shouted as she sobbed loudly hyperventilating making Dr Elkins's eyes began to water up. "My baby can't be dead! No!"_

 ** _My body is a cage_**

 _Harvey fell onto his knees as he began to have visions of him and Donna burying Casey in a rainy cemetery. No parent should ever bury their baby in a grave and he hated the universe. He hated whatever created him and put him on earth. He hated whoever it was that got him into Law. He hated Jessica for making him work for the DA's office. He hated that he was so attracted to her that they decided to get married and have a kid. He hated that his son died._

 ** _That keeps me from dancing with the one I love_**

 _Donna felt like their heart was trying to push its way out of their chest as the world around Harvey blurred for a moment. He couldn't see anything but darkness until it transcended into him having a vision of holding his dead son in his hands and not seeing him sleep in his arms._

 ** _But my mind holds the key_**

 _Harvey felt like he were dying slowly as his breath started to become shallow as Donna started struggled to breathe with no rhythm to her breathing at all._

 ** _I'm standing on the stage_**

 _He heard a pulsing in his head, which seemed to flow through his entire body with Donna slowly feeling that she was losing consciousness.  
_ ** _  
Of fear and self-doubt_**

 _She could feel a panic attack building up, going from feeling anxious and jittery with all the feelings that go with that to the point where they couldn't physically cope with they were feeling.  
 **  
It's a hollow play**_

 _Donna couldn't take it anymore as she let the pain and the world around her go black as falling onto her pillow. **  
** **  
But they'll clap anyway**_

 _Harvey shouted for her as he watched her fall onto her bed to what felt like in slow motion because unable to help reach his hand under her body in time as she felt the world around her go numb._

 ** _I'm living in an age_** ** _  
That calls darkness light  
Though my language is dead  
Still the shapes fill my head_**

 ** _I'm living in an age_**  
 ** _Whose name I don't know_**  
 ** _Though the fear keeps me moving_**  
 ** _Still my heart beats so slow_**

 ** _My body is a cage…._**


	7. Matador

**_Sorry for the short chapter. I've been busy lately with injections, doctor appointments and University :(_**

 ** _Enjoy anyway!_**

* * *

 ** _Soundtrack: Clint Mansell - Moon - The Nursery (I recommend you listen to this whilst reading through the whole story, replay it if you have too...the soundtrack is amazingly sad!)_**

"Donna...I..." Dr Elkins said as Donna turned her head to see Casey being cradled in her arms with a blanket over her.

"Oh god." Donna said as a tear fell down her face.

"Take your time Mrs Paulsen." Dr Elkins said as she slowly handed her Casey in her arms.

Harvey shook his head furiously as he ran outside of the room unable to cope with the emotions overcoming him. He couldn't handle seeing Donna hold their dead child and seeing her heart break even further. Donna looked down at Casey and by the pale skin she could tell he had passed on. There was no sense of a soul being present.

"Hey Casey. It's okay now, everything's gonna be okay you wanna know why? I'll always keep you close to my heart." Donna whispered slowly getting his finger and pointing it to her heart. "But now you've got an important job. More important than me taking care of you now." She paused for a moment unable to conjure up the following words. She closed her eyes and tried to speak. "God needs you to go back to heaven Casey. He needs a small but strong angel and luckily you're my son so you're going to be stronger than everyone else. It's a shame that your little footprints haven't touched the ground you were meant to walk but you'll have wings now and you'll sore into the sky and see this perfect world we were meant to explore. I carried you for nine months inside me and now it's time for you to use them wings and carry yourself and fly into God's arms. Before you go..." Donna paused and began to sob. "I want you to take half my heart and keep it with you. Remember me and your dad when you're with God." She whispered as she kissed Casey on his forehead. "We'll miss you so much but God has chosen you so behave and remember to look over us no matter what. We need you to shine some light over us when the days are dark and it seems there'll be no light at the end of the tunnel."

* * *

There was a knock on the door which got Harvey to get up and slowly walk towards the door and slowly open it. He saw Rachel looking devastated with tears already dripping down her eyes with Mike next to her in shock.

"Is it true?" Mike asked as he saw a tear slowly drop from Harvey's eyes as he nodded.

"Oh god." Rachel gasped as she walked into the room and rushed towards Donna lying down on the bed looking through the window lost in her thoughts.

"Donna, I-"

"She won't respond to anyone." Harvey said sitting down next to Mike as Rachel looked at him.

"How long she's been like this?" Rachel asked holding Donna's hand in hers.

"A few hours. The doctor says I shouldn't try to do anything." Harvey said as Rachel looked at her now dry eyes.

"Donna I don't know what to say. I-this shouldn't have-happened-it shouldn't have happened to you. It's just-I really don't know what to say." Rachel said wiping her eyes from the tears that were formed from before.

"How are you holding up?" Mike asked Harvey and Harvey looked down at him.

"Horribly." Harvey commented shaking his head.

"I don't know what to say Harvey. Take your time and you'll get through this. You always do." Mike said reassuringly.

"There's a difference between getting through mental pain and emotional pain. You can forget what someone said but you can never forget how they made you feel." Harvey said looking down at the floor.

"It can only get easier Harvey." Mike said confidently.

"It's not me I'm worried about. It's Donna. I don't know how she's gonna get through this."

* * *

The rain was pouring down heavy in a murky grotesque afternoon as they stared down Casey's tombstone that set next to Harvey's father letting the tears get lost with the rain.

The funeral was small and most of the people had left because of the rain but Donna and Harvey stayed behind not bothered about the people letting them have their private time alone or if people approached them giving advice that clearly wouldn't help.

As Donna was lost in her thoughts she felt a hand grasping hers making look at it. She saw Harvey's hand holding as she looked up to see Harvey looking down at her nodding.

"I don't want to leave him here all alone. He needs his parents." Donna whispered walking towards the grave but his hand held his wrists tightly stopping her from going forward. She turned her head behind as Harvey shook his head.

"He needs to be set free now." Harvey whispered as Donna shook her head furiously.

"I don't want to set him free!" Donna shouted falling on her knees and sobbing looking down on the ground.

* * *

"The only thing I can recommend you do is sit here and grieve." Dr Agard said staring down at Donna who looked on the stain on the floor.

"I don't want to grieve, I just wanna put the bed warmer over his pyjamas and watch him sleep." Donna said sadly.

"Donna, I-"

"What you gonna do?" Donna asked looking up at her then back down onto the floor. "Stop me from leaving my house because I might faint in the middle of the road with all the stress I'm going through?" She asked shrugging.

"I'm just here to guide you-"

"To a path that's only going to transcend down into horror and trauma. Don't psychoanalyze me. You won't like me when I'm psychoanalyzed." Donna said looking up to look at her.

"I know how you're feeling right now but I need you to try and express-"

"Don't tell me you know how this feels unless you've lost a child!" She said raising her voice as Dr Agard stopped talking. "You don't know what it's like to accept the fact that I'll never be able to get him back again. He's gone forever and eventually when I'm old and clumsy I'll forget what he ever looks like...but I'll never forget the feeling I got that day. It'll never go away. Scars were meant to last a lifetime." Donna said getting up and turning to face the door.

"Not if you can heal from them. They'll be there but it'll only remind you that we're all broken people living in an imperfect world." Dr Agard said as Donna paused to turn around and sit back in the chair.

"I'm sorry Dr Agard. I just..."

"Don't be sorry for expressing yourself. That's the point of you coming here. You gotta open up and not be afraid of what I'll think when you talk about what you're feeling." Dr Agard said making a note in her notepad.

"What makes you think you can convince me that everything will be fine?" Donna asked as Dr Agard looked up from her notepad.

"What do you mean?" Dr Agard asked crossing her eyebrows.

"One day the devil went to God and he told him that he could turn a holy man into a sinner. God accepted the challenge as he told the devil of a holy man named Jake. The devil went to Jake and he started to destroy everything around him. He turned his wife into a adulterer as Joel could never see eye to eye with his wife again. His children left him after the devil convinced them that it was their father who committed the sin of adultery. The devil whispered rumors his friends and their friends about how Jake sexually assaulted a child of 5 causing them to act rebellious against Jake. They beat him up whenever he'd set foot outside his house, spat on his face, spoke ill of him behind his back but after all that Jake would still go onto his knees and pray to God asking for forgiveness for something he never did and to wish everything would be right. The devil realised that he'd just lost a bet and that he would inflict sin among all of the human race. So I guess what I'm asking is if the devil couldn't convince Jake to change what makes you think you can change me?" Donna asked taking a deep breath and waiting for her response.

"Because I want you to keep believing in God." Dr Agard said tilting her head and leaning forward a little setting her notepad on the floor.

"I'm starting to feel like he doesn't exist anymore, that there is nothing but death." Donna said shaking her head and looking away from her.

"Then there's no point of your story if the devil is winning." Dr Agard said interested to see her response.

"I'm sorry for throwing a tantrum at you." Donna said shaking her head.

"Don't apologise for coming to me. You're not fond of eye contact, are you?" Dr Agard said as Donna looked at her briefly.

"I find eyes distracting. It's because I'm afraid I'll see through a person's soul and see who they really are." Donna said nodding her head.

"What do you see when you look through Harvey's soul before and after Casey passed?"

"All I see now is darkness." Donna said shaking her head.

* * *

"How are you feeling Harvey?" Dr Agard asked as Harvey took a seat.

"There's not an answer to that I can give that'd satisfy you." Harvey said settling on the chair.

"Why would you say that?" Dr Agard asked curiously.

"If I say I'm okay then I'll be accused for lying and if I tell you the truth then you'll psychoanalyze the fuck out of me." Harvey said looking at her.

"Your wife told me the same thing but in another context." Dr Agard said trying to encourage a smile on Harvey's face.

"Can I ask you a question Dr Agard?" Harvey asked making her raise her eyebrows.

"Sure." Dr Agard said looking at Harvey.

"God gave me a child. I bonded with child and then he decided to take him away from me...Why? What if he never died and we were meant to be happy like we were supposed to? I wanted to run away with Donna and the kids when I'd get older but I don't know where we would have gone. Maybe this is God's way of saying I was meant to stay here; he could have just told me. He didn't have to take a part of me away." Harvey said looking down at the floor.

"What would happen if you and Donna...if something would cause you both to never see each other ever again?" Dr Agard asked as he slowly lifted his head up to look at her.

"Both of us are alone without each other.

* * *

"Who are you?" Dr Agard asked opening the door and looking up to see a woman with a powerful stature.

"You know who I am?"

"Jessica?" Dr Agard asked curiously as Jessica nodded.

"Bingo." Jessica said.

"Harvey was right, you really do have a powerful stature. Sort of like Vladimir Putin no offence." Dr Agard said signalling Jessica to enter the room as she nodded accepting her request and walked towards the chair.

"Whenever someone compares me to a powerful figure then how can I take offence? It's more of a back handed compliment since it's Vladimir Putin, if you'd say Hitler then I would have slapped you." Jessica said watching Dr Agard take her seat across her.

"And risk filming yourself using my CCTV cameras? But you wouldn't do that because you know about them." Dr Agard said nodding her hair.

"I guess Harvey chose the right therapist." Jessica said impressed at her.

"What do you want anyway? You wanna be a client of mine or-"

"I want to know how he's getting along." Jessica said quickly getting to the point.

"I don't know whether you like metaphors or not but it's useful in this case. Donna is Harvey's matador. He feels her. He understands her. He defies her. He can tame her. And he's the only one able and allowed to do that. However, they can also kill each other. Anytime." Dr Agard said as there was a mutual pause between the both of them.

"Is that your personal opinion or your medical opinion?" Jessica asked curiously.

"Why does it have to be one of the other? But to answer your question it's both. Keep an eye on them, the last thing you want is your best worker's life getting destroyed before your eyes." Dr Agard recommended.

"I will. Thank you for speaking with me Dr Agard." Jessica said standing up.

"Pleasure's all mine."

* * *

"Donna it's okay." Harvey said holding Donna in her arms as she began to cry with tears running down her face. "It was just a nightmare, just a nightmare."

"I want to scream Harvey." Donna whispered shaking her head. "I want to run away, anywhere until my feet bleed and I want to scream but I can't Harvey. I...I can't."

Harvey slowly laid her down next to her placing her arms around her and looking down at her. "Donna. I promise you that it'll get better. If the world was perfect then we wouldn't know what the difference between good or evil."

"I don't want to know the difference-"

"But that's life Donna. Do you trust me?" Harvey asked taking her hand and kissing the back of it.

"With my life." Donna whispered.

"Then trust me when I say that when you look down the dark tunnel, I'm standing right besides you." Harvey whispered back and kissing her cheek. "Sleep my love. Sleep can help the biggest of heartaches and the deepest of troubles."

* * *

"Harvey, do you think you should be back at work?" Mike asked seeing Harvey on his laptop.

"Sure. I heard that you needed my help with your case." Harvey said looking up at Mike.

"We do but-"

"No buts. I'm back now and you're gonna have to get used to me kicking your asses and pushing you." Harvey said smiling as Mike smiled back.

"You're smiling." Mike said nodding his head.

"It feels great I guess. Felt like it's been a while since I smiled and since everything's felt this right." Harvey said nodding as Mike walked away.

He stared at his laptop screen and his mood suddenly changed when he saw his laptop screensaver of him with Donna holding Patrick and Casey in their hands. He stared at their smiles, specifically Donna's and realized how much her missed her smile. That's when he broke down.

Usually everyone cares about a mother's tears but they never realize that the father's heart is also broken when their child dies. For over a month he's been trying to hold it together and be strong for Donna despite the fact that his life will never be the same again. He has to comfort Donna to sleep every night as she's visibly broken from her nightmares and suppressed memories that trigger a great emotion response.

Tears started to stream down his face as he buried his face in his hands. He can't show how much this has broken him in front of everyone so he has to do it alone when no one is watching him and no one will judge him when they realize his whole world has crashed around him. He had no help through his tears so he has to smile through them as the brightness turns bleak.

Men usually don't show how they're feeling because they have to be strong for their loved ones.

But he didn't care about who was watching him right now.

He just wanted his son back.


	8. Memento

"No! No! Mommy!"

The scream tore through Harvey's senses like a rigid shard of glass. He felt his eyes broaden from his sleep as his pulse quickened with his heart drumming like a rock rattling in a box. The scream came again, desperate, terrified.

"Mommy wake up! Please wake up! _Mommy!_ " Angela screamed.

The blood drained from his face as he ran towards her room. He realised that she might be reliving her nightmare when she saw her mother's body. She might be suffering from PTSD which started to scare him as he ran towards Angela's room and opened the door.

The window was fully open with the wind blowing cool air as you can could hear its faint whistle. The wind suddenly started to blow harder growing more furious as he watched Angela clinging onto her teddy sweating like a warm summer's day in California with her face red from tears but eyes still closed, struggling to wake up.

"Daddy! Daddy! I'm scared! Where are you daddy?" Angela shouted moving her head side to side vigorously.

"Hey. It's ok…" Harvey said picking her up and hugging her. He placed a hand through her hair and slowly moved her back and started to clean her face of tears.

"Daddy?" Angela asked confused as she opened her eyes and started to hyperventilate.

"Angela, it's Uncle Harvey. Your dad-—-it's Uncle Harvey. That's all that matters Angie. I'm here for you, okay?" Harvey asked as she started to nod slowing her breathing down slowly and hugged him back.

"I'm sorry." Angela whispered placing her head on his large chest.

"Why are you sorry?" Harvey asked kissing her head.

"I woke you up." Angela whispered looking up and wiping her cheeks.

"Keeping you safe is more important than me sleeping." Harvey said nodding. "What kind of a nightmare was it?"

"Most people would have asked if I had a nightmare." Angela stated confused.

"I know what it's like to have nightmare Angela. So tell me Angela, what did you see?" Harvey asked as he slowly placed her head on her pillow.

"I saw my mommy in the hospital and she didn't wake up and then I-I saw my dad as a ghost and he was lying dead next to her and then he disappeared like he'd always do. And then I saw them getting buried inside a casket and it was so scary Uncle Harvey, I didn't know what to do." Angela said as a tear fell down her face again.

"It's okay to have nightmares sometimes, it just shows that we're not perfect. But it doesn't mean that we have to like them so I want you to cry as much as you want." Harvey whispered soothing her.

"Why would you say that?" Angela asked turning her head to look at him.

"Because anger hurts people in ways you never know it could and tears slowly cleans your heart. So cry all you want but make sure you don't cry for the same reason again." Harvey said calming her down.

 ** _A few moments of silence later_**

"Are you ok now?" Harvey asked a few moments later and slowly getting up.

"Can you stay with me?" Angela asked almost choking on her voice.

"Sure. Yeah, sure Angela." Harvey said slowly lying down next to her. "You want me to read something?" Harvey asked looking around to see the empty bookshelf whilst rubbing his hand up and down her arm.

"I left my books at home. I didn't have enough space in my bad." Angela said resting her head on Harvey's chest.

"I'm gonna go to the library and get a book, you know the same library where I don't want you to go into. You gonna be okay if I leave you for a few minutes?" Harvey asked pointing towards the door.

"Okay but don't leave me for too long." Angela said hugging her teddy closer.

Harvey got up left her room and slowly opened the door to his office shutting it behind behind and stared at the large book collection in front of him. He walked towards it and scanned the top shelf where he kept the books his mother would read for him every night whenever his father was away. He turned his head to the end of the row and took the book out blowing off the dust that'd gathered for some time. He flipped through the pages and smiled as he walked back towards her room.

He returned back and saw Angela lying down with her teddy as she looked at him with her face more enlightened now that compared to moments ago. He lied down next to Angela and looked down at her.

"What's it called?" Angela asked looking at Harvey.

Harvey said smiling and opened the book. "The Hobbit."

* * *

The sound of **Sam Cooke - Wonderful World** was the first thing that caught his senses in his sleep but tried to keep his eyes closed until he felt a hand shaking his body.

"Uncle Harvey…" a melodic voice whispered in his ear, "Wakey, wakey. I made you breakfast!"

Harvey's right eye opened to see Angela holding a wooden tray smiling down him as his other eye opened to make sure he was seeing what he thought he was. Angela placed the tray on the bedside drawer as she began to point at it. He moaned a little as he got up and moved his back against the bed head and looked at the tray.

There was a bowl full of cheerios, two pieces of French toast, a banana and blood orange juice.

"This looks great. Thanks Angela." Harvey said placing the tray on his thighs and quickly began to each his cheerios until- "Ow!" He felt Angela's slap on his hand. He looked at her shocked as she then placed her hands on her hips.

"Eat slowly Uncle Harvey; you'll choke on the Cheerios and they'll have to perform an operation to get it out!" Angela said scolding him.

"Sorry. I'm just hungry." Harvey said smiling and eating at a snails pace.

"Not that slow you'll never get your chores done in time." Angela said rolling hers eyes as she sat on the bed next to Harvey and watched him eat. "Do you like it?" Angela asked nervously.

"I haven't had someone make me breakfast since I woke up naked inside the breakfast bar." He said laughing at the memory and eating his breakfast.

"Why were you naked?" Angela asked curiously.

"That's for me to know and you to never find out." Harvey said pointing his piece of toast at her before eating it.

"Did you have too much alcohol?" Angela asked raising her eyebrow.

"Someone spiked my drink which means that they placed some bad drugs in my drink." Harvey said sighing. "I'm guessing you found my vinyl collection? Great song too."

" **Don't know much about history. Don't know much biology.** " Angela sang as looked at Harvey who had a smile on his face. " **Don't know much about a science book. Don't know much about the French I took. But I do know that I love you. And I know that if you love me too. What a wonderful life it would be.** "

"You never told me you could sing." Harvey said looked down at her and drinking his blood orange juice.

"Whenever I tell people if they want me to sing then they think I'm going to do one of them bad auditions on America's Got Talent...then when I sing they're little minds explode." Angela said with a small giggle.

"Maybe you should give me some lessons." Harvey said as his phone went off.

For the first time Angela heard Harvey's ringtone and laughed when she found out it was **Bee Gees' Stayin' Alive**. He rolled his eyes smirking and answered the call. "Yellow."

"You're not Homer Simpson...or Jim Moriarty from Sherlock." Angela said rolling her eyes in the same manner as Harvey.

"Hold on a moment." Covering the mouthpiece, he looked at Angela, "I need to take a business call so go to your room or something."

* * *

 _ **(BTW: Refn is played by Mads Mikklesen, because Hannibal is awesome and we need more Mads Mikklesen. See The Hunt, he made me cry...and it's a foreign movie!)**_

"No I'm not doing this again. Fuck you Refn." Harvey said shouting across the phone.

"I'm here to simply conduct business Mr Specter." Refn responded cooly. "You were never out Mr Specter let's make that as clear...as the American's would say 'as clear as a glass of moonshine.' And I'm about to tell you something that you don't want to here. Your wife…she was never worth it...she made you weak. I needed the killer closer of New York that would sent people shaking on their knees and she took that away from you and don't you dare blame me for ruining your marriage. You couldn't handle the pressure when the cooks came into the kitchen and them cracks that were showing were opened by you Mr Specter, not someone living in Denmark. You're the author of your pain, not me. Just to let you know I know plenty of women who'd be happy to screw you. I'm just a phone call away and you'll have a woman at your house faster than the pizza man coming to deliver your pizza." Refn said awaiting a response from Harvey.

"Refn-"

"And I can legally divorce the both of you and get you full custody of your kid. Just tell me the judge and you've got it." Refn added as Harvey squeezed his fist angrily.

"You ruined my marriage and I'm not letting you ruin my life." Harvey said cutting the phone off and throwing it against the wall angrily.

After a few minutes later he realised that the vinyl wasn't playing anything which made him walked towards the door.

"Angela?" Harvey asked stepping into the main living room and looked around the rooms.

He looked at the space under her room and saw that it was dark which was unusual because she had a bad habit of leaving them on. He opened the door of her room and didn't hear the water go off which defeated the theory of her having a shower as he started to get him worried. He ran out of her room and checked all the guest rooms and he felt his heart beat start to speed up until he saw a small ray of light exiting from his private study.

He pushed the door open slowly, and spotted Angela sitting on the floor in front of his desk with Polaroids on the floor surrounding her. "Angela? What are—"

"This is your wife, huh? Donna." Angela said reading the bottom of the Polaroid photo as he started to get angrier.

"What are you doing in here?" He said with anger clearly coming through his voice with his face twitching but Angela choosing to ignore the emotion.

"She's pretty." She said innocently admiring the woman in the photograph. "And is that Patrick? He looks so much like you."

"Who do you think you are coming in here and going through my things you little shit?" Harvey barked at her. The anger was bubbling up inside him burning him from the inside, His hands gripped so tightly that his knuckles turned pale white as he felt the pain and fury like a hot desert sand storm inside of him.

"I—I couldn't find you to draw my bath so—"

"So you snuck into the one fucking room I told you to never go in!" Harvey accused, slamming the door behind him with more force than intended. "Put those down!" Harvey pointed madly.

Angela dropped the pictures in her hand straight on the floor. Her face started to flush and her body tensed. "You have no right to touch them even with my permission!" Angela began slowly backing up like a scared animal afraid of its predator. "You have no right to be in here!" She started to panic as the framed picture feel onto the floor and broke into pieces.

"Oh no. I'm sorry!" Angela said trying to pick up the pieces of glass.

"Get the fuck out! Get out!" Harvey said letting out all the anger he felt building up for years finally exploding like a nuclear blast.

Angela stumbled over herself and ran as far as she could get from the study and shut the door behind.

He started at the photo and leaned against the wall as he slowly slid down the wall trying hard not to cry.

 **We keep this love in a photograph  
** **We made these memories for ourselves  
** **Where our eyes are never closing  
** **Hearts are never broken  
** **Times forever frozen still  
** **So you can keep me  
** **Inside the pocket  
** **Of your ripped jeans  
** **Holdin' me closer  
** **'Til our eyes meet  
** **You won't ever be alone**

 **Wait for me to come home**

* * *

" _I think I'd like to go back home Harvey." Donna said which destroyed Harvey's plans from the root up. She closed their picnic basket and looking up at him since she was lying down on his chest._

 _"Let's stay for a bit." Harvey said looking down at her improvising._

 _"I'm tired." Donna said stretching and getting up. "Want me to help you?"_

 _"Sure." Harvey said extending him arm as he used her hand to get himself up. She was already walking towards the car as he picked up the basket in deep thought about what he was going to do until an idea struck him. "Donna."_

 _Donna looked back and saw Harvey putting the basket down and trying his shoe laces. "What's the matter?"_

 _"Can you do me a favour and grab this?" Harvey asked holding the basket towards her. She rolled her eyes smiling and skipped towards him like a teen and grabbed the basket. "And check if we haven't left anything."_

 _She looked through the basket and started humming._

 _"And grab this for me." Harvey said. She took the object not looking at it still looking in the object and felt the surface of it which made her stop looking. She opened her eye widely and looked at the object and it was a ring holder. She opened it slowly feeling her heart beat and started breathing heavily as she stared at the large engagement ring she was holding._

 _"Donna." Harvey said cutting her train of thoughts off. "Marry me."_

 _"You're joking right?" She asked staring at the diamond ring._

 _"I wouldn't be joking if I bought you a diamond engagement ring." Harvey said getting up placing his hands on her hips._

 _"We can't get married." Donna said nervously almost choking up. Harvey slowly pulled her body towards him and looked into her eyes._

 _"Of course we can. That's what insane people do. Just say yes and I'll take you to the chapel and let the choir bells sing for you." Harvey said whispering and looking into her eyes deeply._

 _"You'll eventually be miserable with me." Donna said looking up at him and closing the box._

" _No." Harvey said holding her free and tangling their fingers together. "I want to be the father of our kids. We can have as many as you want. And when we do have kids and when we're happy, I'll quit my job to raise them with you once we turn 50." He said resting his forehead against hers and closing his eyes trying not to cry. "I want to be with_ you _for the rest of my life. I can't imagine living without you; I want your future Donna. When I look into your eyes I get lost like you have galaxies in your veins and the universe is at your fingertips and I don't want to lose that feeling at all." He whispered holding her hand and placing placing velvet box on her palm and opening it. "Marry me, please?"_

 _"Harvey…I'm so sorry." She said closing her eyes._

 _He stood rooted to the ground and felt like his whole world was shattering in front of her. His throat went dry from her tone and he thought might have preferred to die on the spot._

" _I guess this proposal is a lot better than what I was going to do." Donna smirked as she opened her eyes to look at him._

" _Does that mean—"_

 _"It's a yes." She said jumping onto him and kissing him passionately on her lips as both of them felt their feels falling onto their lip smiling at the taste._

* * *

Harvey woke up propped against his file cabinet. Eyes puffy and red. A migraine threatening to form. He found his way into the hallway and walked towards Angela's room regretting his anger getting the better of him. He opened the door slowly seeing Angela huddled up with her teddy against the wall.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you Angie." Harvey said tip-toed towards her. Harvey sat next to her, "I haven't seen those pictures in a while and now you know why. I let out the secret side inside of me that I keep caged for a reason. And when that secret side comes out then I just need people to stay away from me because it turns real ugly and I can't hold that rage in anymore. It takes complete control of me and I have to confess when I tell you that I turn into a monster. I need you to understand Angela; please don't be scared of me. I promise not to let the monster out anymore." Harvey said reassuring her.

"I shouldn't have gone in at all. I'm sorry. I'll never do it again." Angela whispered still looking down.

Harvey shook his head. "I shouldn't have lost my temper like that."

Angela sniffed and nodded. Harvey slipped three Polaroids from his pants pocket smiling at it. "This is my favourite picture of her…your aunt Donna…we were just engaged and went on vacation." Harvey said.

"I teared the photo; I've ruined it now…"

"I can tape it, or get a copy." Harvey said tilting his head at the photo.

"When was it taken?" Angela asked looking at the background and not recognising the country.

"Just after we got engaged...in Switzerland."

* * *

 _Donna heard the click of the Polaroid and glanced up. "Harvey! Stop taking pictures of me." She said blushing a little and trying to snatch the photo away from his hands but moving his hands away._

" _Why? You look incredibly sexy when you concentrate." Harvey said flapping the Polaroid and waiting for the photo to appear._

 _"You tell me I look sexy when I read with my reading glasses so I'm starting to think you don't understand the definition of sexy." Donna asked glaring at him._

 _"I do know the definition and I don't need one when I have a living embodiment shimmering before my eyes as a poet would say." Harvey said smiling at the Polaroid formed. "I love seeing you happy because of me. How'd you rate my attempt at poetry by the way?"_

 _"I'd rate it 1/10 because I wanted to hear more." Donna stated._

 _"You can't rate something 1/10 because it's incomplete." Harvey replied._

 _"Of course you can._ _How do you know I'm happy because of_ you _?" Donna said moving towards Harvey and sitting on his lap._

 _"Because people who usually ask that know it's true." He said looking at the road and smiling._

 _"How much do you want to bet?" Donna asked raising her eyebrows biting her lip._

" _A kiss?" Harvey asked stopping the car on the side of the road and picking up her hand and kissing her ring. "From my future wife?"_

 _Her grin spread and accepted defeat as she put her hand back onto his lap. "You win this time Mr Specter." He smiled back as he put his hand around Donna back as she kissed him on her cheek._

 _"Your fiancé deserves more than that." He body towards his and kissed her lips tenderly a few times._

 _"I have an idea." Donna said against his lip smiling into his eyes and took the Polaroid._

 _"You want another picture?" Harvey asked curiously._

 _"Let's take one with the both of us and a different one." Donna said moving her face next to his and taking a selfie._

 _"What's the other photo you want to take?" Harvey asked._

 _"You know whenever you say 'when I'm not with you I always forget how beautiful you are?'" Donna asked mocking his tones._

 _"Yeahhhh?" Harvey asked his voice croaking._

 _"How about you take a special picture of me." She said taking the buttons of her dress and letting the shoulder straps along with the dress fall down her body._

 _"Donna-"_

 _She put a finger on his lips and handed her his Polaroid camera. "Take a dirty picture of me." She said grinning._

 _ **Soundtrack: Andy Quin - Awakening**_

"I'll take one once you close your eyes." Harvey said he slowly got a blindfold and covered her eyes.

 _"Where you taking us?" Donna asked smiling putting the buttons of her dress back and closing her fur coat zipper._

 _Harvey carried on driving until it stopped to a halt about five minutes later. Donna heard Harvey get out of the car, shutting his door behind and slowly getting her out from her side._

 _"Here we are, just come with me and take me hand." Harvey whispered as she held out both of her hands for him to lock his fingers with as he walked backwards._

 _She felt blast of arctic air spearing through her coat and prickling along her skin; sinking down to her bones. "It's a good thing I wore a coat." Donna said shaking her arms a little from the chill._

 _"No one goes to Switzerland without a coat…now keep your eyes closed." Harvey whispered walked behind her and slowly took her blindfold off._

 _She kept her eyes closed and smile intact as she felt the sun skimming past her eyelids only to be protected by Harvey's hands._

 _"Still don't trust me Specter?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow._

 _"I'll always trust you but you're pretty bad with surprises." Harvey commented as Donna gasped._

 _"You're lucky I can't see otherwise I would have kicked your ass by now." Donna replied with a smile at the end of her mouth._

 _"Don't wanna ruin the surprise." Harvey replied as he paused._

 _"Can you take your hands off now love?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow._

 _"Only if you call me darling with that sexy voice of yours." Harvey requested as Donna shook her head._

 _"Can I see your surprise now my beautiful, sexy, hot enigmatic darling?" Donna asked milking her sexy voice._

 _"You can open them now." Harvey whispered in her ear as he took his hands from Donna's eyes and placing his arms around her stomach and resting his head on her shoulders._

 _"Harvey…"_

 _The heaven-touching apex of the mountain was drenched in brilliant light as they seemed to touch the sky, and were painted in snow. Every freshly fallen flake sparkled like a beautiful diamond in daybreak. She felt a peaceful feeling overtaking her. She stood there quietly and stared at the wondrous mountains for what seemed like hours before making seeing the cabin that was in front of her._

 _"Is this the Alps?" Donna whispered look at him as a tear fell down her face in happiness._

 _"Do you love it?" Harvey asked kissing her cheek and wiping the tear from her face as he watched her face trying to process the visual orgy._

 _"I….I..oh my god! Harvey this is-"_

 _Harvey put his arms around her and picked up making her yelp as he spun her around._

 _"Harvey!" Donna yelped looking down at her._

 _"I wanna hear you say it." Harvey said still spinning her right round._

 _"I love it!" Donna shouting as she let her arms out and tilted her head back and closing her eyes whilst laughing and embracing the cold wind that was hitting them. "Let's flyyyyyyyyy! Up, up here we go!"  
_

* * *

 **Soundtrack: Clint Mansell - Moon - Memories**

"And this is my favourite picture of my little boy." Harvey said handing it to her.

"Patrick." Angela said looking at the boy in the photo and smiling.

"Your cousin. We took this in London on New Year's Day which explains the British flag painted all over our faces, except Patrick. He wanted a dinosaur on his face." Harvey said laughing. "He'll be around eight or nine this year. I don't have much pictures of him, I wish I did, she took most of them with her."

"You loved her a lot, didn't you? You look just as happy as she does." Angela said looking at Donna's face.

"I was but I never loved her like I can." Harvey said staring at the photo. "I loved her. She loved me. It was supposed to be the beginning of a love which became some sort of addiction. But I realised that the same thirst for love which brought us together almost killed us both. One day I woke up and found out something changed forever. It's not something physical because it was a sense that was lingering for a while but then that sense became a feeling as I tried to keep the pieces together but you just can't get back to the way it was. Our passion and longing turned into misunderstanding and despair and I found myself wanting to remain blind than living the consequences of what was supposed to be a never ending love. The same love I still feel today."

"Do you still love her?" Angela asked looking at him.

"Just because she isn't in my life anymore doesn't mean I still don't love her. It just means we stopped hurting each other. But of course I still love her. I loved her with a love that was more than love." Harvey said pausing as Angela let the silence sink in. "It's funny how you fall in love with a specific person. There isn't really an explanation for it and I don't want a reason either because I'm glad I feel in love with her."

"If you still love her then why aren't you still together? What happened?" Angela asked.

"I messed up Angela. I fucked up and she gave up on me and she disappeared forever." Harvey said pausing as he felt like he was going to choke on his words. "I don't know where she is and I can't find her. I don't know where to start looking because I'm feel like a bind man running in a maze takes me back to the start. It's like she just fell off the face of the earth like she never existed sorta like the disappearance of Donna Paulsen. Just look at the damage that she's done as times gone on, I mean you saw what a savage I've became in my eyes. What did you see in my eyes Angela?" Harvey said looking down at her.

"It was dark Uncle Harvey. As if there was no light, no love but when I heard you collapse on the floor it was like you were hoping and praying for a miracle. I can't really explain it." Angela said looking down at her shoes and back up at him.

"The reason I got angry with you was because I cried myself to sleep after she left me. I felt like I lost my favourite thing in the world. I couldn't replace her either because it's impossible to think about where to start with that. One day I decided to seperate myself with everything that made me remember her because she crucified my heart. Songs, places, pictures, anything and everything that made me think of her. I haven't cried over her for years until today but whenever I heard the sound of her name I felt weak at my knees and made me tremble." Harvey said leaving the thought hanging. "Here, why don't you keep these?"

"But they're your favourite photos." Angela said shocked.

Harvey swallowed hard and took one last look at them. "I've been lying myself for years trying to keep me happy because the loveless night felt so long and the Sunday's felt like another lonely Sunday. I started to believe my own lies and didn't recognise the truth anymore and I ended up losing respect for myself or anyone else and I forgot how to love. I realised it all started with these photos which reminds me of the hard truth. I don't even know how long they've left me, must have been about seven…maybe eight years. I've lost track of time and humanity and how can I heal if I can't feel time? I have to believe that when I close my eyes every night that the world is still here when my beautiful nightmares put me to sleep. So keep them before I change my mind."

"Do you remember your conversations with her?" Angela asked curiously. "Like when you told her that you loved her, your first date, the day you got married?"

"A man can forget what a person says but they can never forget what they made them feel."

* * *

 _ **SOUNDTRACK: (SAME AS ABOVE)**_

 _"How'd you manage to get a cabin in Switzerland?" Donna asked turning her head as they lay down on top of the roof of the cabin._

 _"I know a guy." Harvey said taking a sip of his tea._

 _"Starting to worry you know too many guys…it's okay to come out of the closet you know." Donna said patting his thigh teasing as she took a sip of her hot chocolate._

 _"Maybe I'll bring home a man one day and kiss him in front you…maybe Jake Gyllenhaal." Harvey said smirking._

 _"Now you're just being a tease." Donna said rolling her eyes. "Maybe I should bring Charlize Theron home one day and see how you'd like it."_

 _"I'd love that." Harvey said with a Cheshire grin._

 _"You're saying you're open to threesomes?" Donna asked gasping._

 _"I couldn't possibly comment on that." Harvey said looking at the mountains._

 _"I bet in your weird fantasy you'd love to screw more than just me but with me by your side." Donna said sighing._

 _"That's why they're called fantasies." Harvey said turning his body to face hers._

 _"Speaking about fantasies..."_

 _"Uh oh." Harvey added._

 _"How many times have you, yes YOU Harvey Specter, have imagined us coming here and watching the sunset?" Donna asked as he put his hand on her face with his thumb caressing her cheek._

 _"Since the day I realised that there is absolutely nothing in the world I want then to be with you for the rest of my life." Harvey whispered back as she looking down blushing._

 _"So you knew we'd be together?" Donna asked looking back at him._

 _"Maybe." Harvey said biting his lip._

 _"Again with the teasing my American love?" Donna asked biting her lip too in response._

 _"Your American love?" Harvey asked curiously._

 _"We're in a foreign country so I have the right to call you my American love." Donna said smiling at the thought._

 _"I'd expect a foreign man-"_

 _"Sexist." Donna replied quickly._

 _"Or foreign woman saying that to their American lovers. Not an American to an American because they're in a foreign country." Harvey said thinking about the logic behind the phrase._

 _"Just shut up and enjoy your title." Donna said rolling her eyes._

 _"Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too." Harvey sang smiling._

 _"I still can't believe you sang that to my dad. He was half way between laughing and kicking the shit out of you." Donna said moving her head on Harvey's stomach._

 _"It worked and that's all that matters. I would have still proposed to you with bruised eyes from your dad's surprisingly large hands." Harvey said looking at his hands and shivering at the thought of the size of Jon's hands._

 _"I would've been nursing you instead and thought you had brain damage if you proposed like." Donna said placing her hot chocolate mug to the side and stretching her arms._

 _"It's better than proposing during sex." Harvey said smirking._

 _"What do you mean?" Donna asked looking at him confused. "Who the hell would propose during sex?"_

 _"I'm just saying that if I proposed to you during sex then it would've turned you on either further." Harvey stated as Donna felt offended._

 _"And where would you put the engagement ring?" Donna asked curiously._

 _"The same place where Sean Penn keeps his Oscars? Next to the condoms." Harvey said as Donna started to laugh._ _"Most women would be disgusted at what I just said...and you're laughing."_

 _"I'm not most women…I'm Donna." Donna said leaning her head up his chest._

 _"I know and I'm glad you're not like other women. You're not tears lost in the rain or like a person blending in a maddening crowd." Harvey said smiling._

 _"Tell me more. I'm loving this." Donna said until their faces were inches apart._

 _"I could spend a lifetime telling you how many times I fell in love with you." Harvey whispered taking her hands in his and looking at her ring finger. "I fall in love with you every day. Your smile. Your eyes. Your voice. Your laugh. Your warmth. Your existence…you."_

 _Harvey whispered as she moved her body over his and placing her face into the crook of his neck, feeling his neck get wet suddenly._

 _"I love you so much Harvey Specter." Donna mumbled crying into his neck._

 _Harvey lifted her head up and he saw how much she loved him. The tears fell down her cheeks and threatened to ruin her mascara as he began to clean it with his thump until he rested his forehead against hers._

 _"I love you Donna. Forever. Remember what I said about happy tears?" Harvey asked as Donna nodded and smiled._

 _"Happy tears are still tears." Donna whispered repeating his words._

 _"I never want to see you cry, it just breaks my hears seeing you cry." Harvey whispered back kissing he forehead._

 _"I can't help but cry. You make me feel so happy and you don't have-"_

 _"Of course I have to make you happy. How else are you supposed to trust me when I tell you that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want us to grow old together, watch the sunset everyday, see the world around us change along with the people and when one of us dies then we hope to see the other on the other side waiting for them to come to run towards you so you can share a hug and live together for eternity. That's why I want to make you happy Donna Paulsen." Harvey whispered as Donna felt more tears falling down her eyes._

 _"Why do you have to make me cry again?" Donna asked as Harvey moved towards her and shared a hug._

 _"Maybe it's just a way for me to know I'm doing something right. I don't do much things right but this...I know I'm meant to be doing this so answer me when I ask you if you_ _wanna watch the sun set?" He asked as Donna nodded. He kissed her forehead again as they cuddled up together._

 _A scorching red orb of light slowly sank beneath the skyline, and threads of light stayed in the sky, circulating with the rolling clouds, dyeing the heavens first orange, then red, then dark blue, until all that was left of the sunset was a chalky lilac, and then that melted away in turn as stygian darkness took over the sky. Sequin-silver stars like the shining cinders of a fading fire flashed down at them, enlightening the atramentous drape of sky, and then the clouds divided, and she found herself looking at a glossy, argent disc casting brilliant rays of moonlight onto the dark grounds._

* * *

Harvey was late to pick Angela up from camp. Luckily Coach Dunne was talking to the rest of the kids whose parents left behind their kids and made them feel as comfortable as possible. "You're always early. I thought something happened to you. I got worried Uncle Harvey."

"I got side tracked finishing up a project. Ready to go?" Harvey asked.

It was one of the hotter days in New York so he took his hatchback Mercedes and wore white Raplh Lauren shirt with red and blue vertical stripes with dark blue Lands' end pants, brown Levi's belt, brown Banana republic shoes and wayfarer's.

She wanted to comment at how casual he looked compared to his usual suit and tie but she was in no mood because of what happened last night. When they got back, she was starving and watched the Disney Channel as Harvey made her someone pasta. "Hey Angela, come here. I want you to see something." She put the plate aside and trudged over. "Put your hands over your eyes."

"Why?" her head tilted.

"Cause I've got a bit of a surprise for you, Angie." She slapped her palms over her eyes and let him guide her. "You know how I told you never to go into the study?"

"Yeah…" said the child guiltily.

"Turned it into a bedroom for you." Harvey said smiling. She opened her eyes and her jaw might as well literally have dropped onto the floor.


	9. Once More Into The Fray

**_Thanks for everyone who's reviewed this story so far. I'm so happy that you've gone through a range of different emotions so far so all I can tease y'all about is that the flashbacks will get pretty grim because now you're gonna see what happened in their marriage that slowly starts to explain why their marriage fell apart._**

 ** _BTW: Angela is played by Mackenzie Foy. Don't why I wanted to write that but why not. It'll give you an idea of what she looks like I guess._**

* * *

 _ **Soundtrack: Charlies Bradley - Heartaches and Pain**_

"WOAH." Angela gasped as her eyes turned as big as the moon and as bright as the sun. She sprinted to the center of the room and spun around trying to take it all in.

The walls were still white but her eyes were bombarded with pink. Pink wardrobe, pink bed covers, pink lamp, pink and white drawers, with a picture of a pink rose on the wall. Gauzy white curtains hung from the posts at the headboard and footboard but tied back by light pink bows. Her pillows were big fluffy and white. She also has a mini couch next to her mahogany table where she could relax and do whatever she wanted too. On the desk, he set up a Mac with attached pink keyboard with a Guardians Of The Galaxy poster on the wall.

She walked slightly forward and saw a large TV across the bed that had Netflix and Amazon Prime if she ever wanted to watch a movie before bed or if Uncle Harvey wasn't letting her change the channel from his sports which did annoy her because she had to sit through 'boring men hitting balls in a children's game'.

"Do you like it?" Harvey asked with a smile and leaning against the door.

Angela stopped to look him in the eye. "Oh, Uncle Harvey," and then she jumped and wrapped her arms around his neck, suffocating him as much as she could. "I love it! Thank you, thank you, thank you! But what about your study?!" She asked letting go and sitting onto her bed with curious eyes.

"Moved my desk and computer to my room. This place is too big for me now; I don't need that kind of space. I've always told myself that if I ever wanted to fix something then I have to take it all apart and figure out what's important so I guess you could say I'm taking apart my marriage by getting rid of this space." Harvey asked looking around with his hands on his hips.

"I didn't know you'd do it literally." Angela said looking up at him.

"Actions speak louder than words Angie." Harvey said smiling at her.

"What you gonna do it when I leave?" Angela asked lying down and looking up at the ceiling.

"Nothing, I'm gonna leave it if you ever wanted to come back. You'll come back to visit, right?" Harvey asked looking down at her and realising how much Angela's grown onto her and how he wished things with Donna and Patrick were different. Angela got up and looked towards Harvey with a smile on her face.

"You have no idea how much this means to me." Angela whispered and feeling like she was going to cry but resisted the urge as she slowly walked towards Harvey and cried as the both of them shared a warm hug.

* * *

 ** _Soundtrack: Jamin Winans - The City Surf_**

 _Harvey made his way slowly towards his father's grave. He looked around slowly to make sure no one was here so that he could talk with him privately. No matter how many times he visited him he couldn't shake the feeling of his heart being clamped around his vice._

 _He sat down in front of the headstone and stared at it._

" _Hey dad." Harvey said followed by silence. "It's been a long time since we last spoke and I guess I've been busy." He took a shot of his whiskey and clenched his eyes in the taste before relaxing and opening his eyes._

" _I needed to talk to someone who wouldn't give me fake advice…it's been a year since Casey died." Harvey said as his words shook. "I should've gotten over it but I don't know why I can't. Maybe it was the hurt on Donna's voice that did it or the silence in the house afterwards. We never spoke to each other for about two months, we couldn't handle it." Harvey said closing his eyes for a moment and concentrating on his breathing._

" _I still wish you were here, you would have loved Donna. You would have loved holding Patrick in your arms like you did to me and Marcus. You let me too early Dad. I wanted you to see Donna and give me advice about women. I wanted to see your face when I'd tell you that I decided to marry her not just for how beautiful she is but how hearing her voice silences my demons. I wanted you to see us get married as we'd walk down the aisle and say 'I do' and have our first kiss as man and wife. I wanted to see your face when I'd tell you that you were going to be a grandfather. I wanted you by my side when Casey died and tell me how everything was going to be alright. I wanted you to give me your fatherly advice." Harvey said ignoring the tears that were streaming down his face._

 _He leaned against his father's gravestone, his head resting on his knees and sobbed silently. "This world…it's too cruel. But at least you get to rest next to your grandson." Harvey said looking at the gravestone next to his and reading Casey's name. "Maybe there's a way that God lets you speak to him and you get to be there for him like I couldn't be…maybe you get to see how much he'd grow up to look like me and be proud of us."_

* * *

"It always ended in a mess," Harvey said shaking his head as they almost finished making the pasta for dinner. "You cook with your parents?"

"Mostly cooked with Mommy." Angela said smiling to himself.

"You're close to your mom, aren't you?" Harvey asked looking down at her.

Angela nodded, peeking back into her pot to make sure all was well. "Very close. We're as close as our fingers closed like this." She said crossing her middle finger with her ring finger.

"What kind of things did you and your mom cook?" Harvey asked changing the subject after detecting a hint of melancholy in her bounce.

"Cakes, bread, pasties, pies, doughnuts, bagels, cinnamon rolls, she could bake anything. We'd have matching aprons and we'd bake a lot to raise money for charity and there was a line till almost the end of the block. It was crazy." Angela said smiling warmly at the memory. "We cooked other things too. Like dinners and stuff oh and pancakes! Mommy made the _best_ pancakes and waffles."

"Donna makes great pancakes too." Harvey said smiling back.

"Well my mom put mint and chocolate chip in hers." Angela said defensively and challenging Harvey after feeling challenged.

" _Donna_ made them with white chocolate chips and cinnamon." Harvey said stirring the pasta with the ingredients in the pot.

"Talk about being clichéd." Angela said rolling her eyes and smiling.

"They were the best goddamn pancakes I've ever tasted." Harvey replied.

"You haven't tried my Mommy's." Angela said quickly folding her arms.

"You haven't tried Donna's." Harvey said refusing to lose to a child.

"How about we both agree that we tasted some damn fine pancakes from both of our women." Angela said giggling and putting her hands out so that they stop fighting.

"Wow, you might have a career in politics after all and become the first woman president." Harvey said in a 'not bad' facial expression.

"Democracy is so overrated."

* * *

 _After a bath, a tablespoon of medicine forced down by Harvey and new clothes, the little boy fell asleep in Donna and Harvey's bed. "He's going to be okay."_

 _Donna glared at him, "I cannot believe you." His jaw grit. Harvey despised her being mad at him. "You know nothing about our child."_

 _Harvey took a deep breath then plunged in to help her remove the soiled sheets. "I know plenty."_

 _"What else is he allergic to?" Donna brushed passed him to get to the laundry room. Harvey grabbed Patrick's bunched up pajamas and did the same. "Dust."_

 _"And?"_

 _"That's it." Harvey said as Donna scoffed._

 _"Nope. There's nuts. He can't have wheat and latex." Donna said looking at him ashamed._

 _"Latex?" Harvey asked thinking that Donna must have been joking._

 _"Yeah. They have to use special gloves at the dentist and doctor's office. He breaks out." Donna said brushing moving her face away from his._

 _"Okay, well I can't help that you discovered those and never told me." Harvey said putting his hands up like it wasn't his fault as Donna scoffed as his words._

 _"What's his favorite colour?" Donna asked changing the subject._

 _"Red." Harvey quickly responded as if it was obvious._

 _"Blue. Jesus Harvey they're not even on the same spectrum." Donna said shaking her head and looking at him in disgust. You know what stuffed animal he sleeps with?"_

 _Harvey rubbed his forehead self-reproachfully, "No, I don't."_

 _"Harvey." Donna said._

 _"What? I'm sorry, I do—"_

 _"No, that's what he named his teddy: Harvey. He doesn't see you as his father, he sees you as an object of desperation. When you leave, the teddy sits at your place at the dinner table. He puts it in the passenger seat when we ride in the car. And when I'm cooking he'll sneak to the closet and put your ties on his bear like I used to. He makes the bear kiss me goodnight, every night while you're gone...fuck." Donna said bursting into tears. Harvey swooped in and hugged her try to stop her from hyperventilating._

 _"When kids ask him who his father is he says it's our neighbour Mr Hardy because when he takes his son to the zoo he takes Patrick too. Can't you say no this time to Refn? I know how much he means to the firm but please stay home with me and Patrick, just once. Put us first, just once." Donna said looking at him tears running down her cheeks._

 _"You know I want to…" Harvey whispered holding her hands and rubbing his thumb along her knuckles._

 _"I feel like you're stabbing me, Harvey. At least stay the night." Donna asked breaking their hug and looking at him._

 _"Just give me four to six months. This case is more brutal than I expected." Harvey said kissing her forehead._

 _"When we married you made a vow to me that you'll be by mind side no matter what. All you've done is make me feel all alone. Does our marriage mean nothing to you Harv'?"_

 _"Stop. You know it means everything Donna. I love you."_

 _"You show you love me in strange ways Harvey. I have tried to be supportive and understanding for years. If walking the door myself is the only way to end it, then that's what I have to do." Before Harvey could say anything she had already walked past him and ran to her bedroom. She shut the door behind locking it and leaned onto the wall and sobbed more tears as she slid down the wall not caring about anything._

* * *

Angela's spent the first night in her room watching the Batman classic Batman and Robin. When Harvey walked into her room and saw what she was watching he wanted to throw the remote and throw it onto the TV as he gave a 20 minute rant about why Batman and Robin is a disgrace to humanity and why Batman shouldn't have any bat nipples. When Angela quotes Mr Freeze played by the charismatic Arnold Schwarzenegger, he looked down at her in disgust before leaving and said "There's no one in the world I hate more than you right now."

After the movie finished she turned the TV off and turned the light off to slowly fall asleep, but she woke up two more times to turn the TV on and slowly tip toe towards it staring at the HD quality.

The third time she turned her lamp on and took her her journal and began to stick on her Polaroid photos. The first page on her journal was getting onto the airport with the second page dominated of the view from her plane. She flipped a few pages and took the pictures of her new bedroom and placed them onto the corner. She took out a green marked and wrote _"My epically awesometacular bedroom!"_

The sound of her phone buzzing under her pillow stopped her from writing for a moment as she looked at the time. It was almost 12 but Uncle Harvey didn't go to bed until 1. She quickly took her phone and answered it as she walked towards the bathroom and opened the tap to make sure he couldn't listen to the conversation.

"Hey." Angela said yawing a little.

"How are you doing?" The woman said from the other end of the call.

"I'm doing great! How's everyone back home?" Angela asked putting her hand on the back of her neck.

"You shouldn't thinking about us, you should be having the time of your life."

"And I certainly am. I've never felt this way before and I guess I owe it up to you." Angela said smiling.

"And how's your training?"

"Great. Coach Dunne says that she knows the coach in London and she said she'd give a strong recommendation to her."

"That's fantastic. I can't wait to see you play." The woman said excitingly. "I just wanted to check in and get some sleep. You sound tired."

"Will do. Says hey from me. Night." Angela said.

"Night sweetie."

* * *

 _"Come on, Sweetheart, don't act so distraught." Harvey said lying down next to Donna as he put his forehead against hers._

 _"You're breaking my heart." Donna said not looking at him._

 _"I'll be back in no time. You know how much of a mess this Refn situation is." Harvey said._

" _But you won't be here." Donna stated like it was nothing._

" _Donna-"_

 _"Please, Harvey, don't walk out the door and leave. Don't make me do something I'm going to regret." Donna whispered finally looking deep into his eyes hoping she could convince him._

 _"Just wait for me one more time, okay?" Harvey whispered back blowing a strand of her red soft hair away from his eyes._

 _Donna's head pulled away from his and sat up looking at him angry. "You know how many times we've waited? I gave up everything to be with you and you can't even do the same for us."_

 _"I'll make all of this up to you, I promise. I just can't cancel on short notice Donna. You know Jessica can't do this without-"_

 _"I'm not listening to you." Donna said covering her ears and feeling like she was going to tear up. Harvey got up and managed to take the hand of one of her hears and rested his lips against them._

 _"When I come back I'll promise to take you anywhere you want. Just the three of us. We can go Lebanon, Denmark, England, in any corner of the world. Just tell me and I'll take us." He said bribing her again as Donna's eyes began to well up._

 _"When I told you that I dreamed of us having a family I shouldn't have told you. I should have kept that with me till the day I died so I don't have to go through this. I should have known that me and Patrick were never enough for you, that we couldn't give you the thrill of winning." She said cracking her voice._

 _"You two are everything to me. You know I love you two more than anything in this world…"_

 _"Stop saying what I want to fucking hear. Stop lying to me." She could feel her makeup getting ruined because all she was doing was sobbing in her hands.. "Are you ever going to quit? Are you ever going to be able to live a normal life with me? If I gave you a choice would you pick me over your job?"_

" _Baby—"_

" _I know that you're addicted to winning and that it makes you happy. If you want to keep feeling happy then carry on making your trips around the world but don't include in your plans because if you're going to leave us then you might as well leave us forever." She said finding the courage to throw a suitcase on his face. "I'm not going to arguing anymore, I'm tired of it" she stormed out of their bedroom and slammed the door closed._

* * *

When Angela woke up she made sure she made her bed to precision. She wouldn't do it before but with Uncle Harvey sacrificing his study for her bedroom the least she could do was show care and love for it. She opened her curtains and smiled at the sun shining down the park that was across them as she watched children play on the swings.

She opened the window as she got dressed and walked out of her room where she resumed her normal morning schedule with Harvey doing her hair and making her breakfast. But when she walked out she found out that he never made breakfast.

"No breakfast?" Angela asked looking into the kitchen.

"Decided it was the perfect day for a walk. We can have breakfast at a cafe if you don't mind?" Harvey asked putting his tie on.

"Do you have to wear a suit and tie?" Angela asked pointing at his suit.

"When you're older and you find a man that you'll love-"

"Uncle Harvey are you giving me _'the talk'_?" Angela asked worried.

"No! What? How do you even know about _'the talk_ '?" Harvey asked confused.

"I watch a lot of movies." Angela said shrugging.

"So I was saying when you find a man that you love you'll want him to look smart for you? Why? Because it shows that they care about you? Since I'm not with any woman, guys'll see me and study real close to learn something and with the women-let's say you could have a new Aunty." Harvey said smirking.

"As long as they don't leave lipstick marks on your neck or face...or hickeys." Angela said feeling goosebumps down her spine.

"Movies?" Harvey asked.

"TV." Angela said grabbing her bag as the both of them left.

* * *

 _Patrick happily went off playing with his train backpack full of new toys. Patrick's mother however was less enthused as she left her new bracelet in its box beside them. "What's the matter?" He hugged his wife's waist, "Don't you like your presents?"_

 _"Where is it?" Donna asked numbly. "The job. Where's the job Harvey."_

 _Harvey's innocent smokescreen fell._

 _"I'm not stupid, I wasn't born today. Drop your fraud smoke and mirrors act and tell me." He knew that whenever he had to fly to another country, to talk business as part of his advanced promotion, he'd shower them with gifts to try and sweeten the pain of leaving them for months._

 _"Montreal. It's just three months." He said simply._

 _"Three months?" Donna asked dropping her arms down angrily._

 _"I know, I know…"_

 _Hands on her hips, Harvey's wife shook her head at him. "You're going to miss Patrick's birthday...again."_

 _"I was here for the last one Donna." Harvey said trying to reason with her._

 _"You flew in halfway and you were so jet lagged that you were in bed by three in the afternoon." Donna said her voice growing louder in anger._

 _"Baby, they need me. You knew that when I decided to take on more responsibilities." Harvey said running his hand through his hair._

 _"You know who else needs you?" She asked sarcastically. "Your family." Then she turned her back on him and stormed to their bedroom._

 _"I promise no more foreign jobs Donna." Harvey followed and reasoned._

 _"That's what you said last time you fucking fraud. And the time before that. And before that." She said with symbolically spitting out venom as she pulled on his tie. "You promised you were done."_

 _"Baby you know...fuck Donna!" Harvey said grabbing a chunk of his hair. For a moment Harvey thought that maybe Donna missed work. They could both work together; spend all that time together again. "Do you want to go back to work? I can make it happen so we can go together. We can leave Patrick with your parents' place or-."_

 _"Do you hear yourself Harvey Specter?" She marched back out of the closet. "We're not both leaving and pushing him off on someone else for three months selfishly. You make our son sound like a pet Specter. Honestly; do you love him at all?"_

 _Harvey went into the closet with her, defending himself and pulling her into his arms, "Hey. You know I do. I love both of you."_

 _"You make me wonder…"_

 _Harvey furrowed his eyebrows at her. "Don't act like that."_

 _She quickly paced away from him._ _"You've been home three, maybe four months in the past year. And you're leaving us again for the sake of all that's holy." The woman refused to look at him as she sat on their bed and shoved on her socks one by one. "Patrick's four and barely knows who you are."_

 _"He's knows I'm his dad. I don't understand." Harvey said confused._

 _"You know what he calls you? Not Dad...Harvey. He calls you Harvey and it's imprinted like a dog gets hungry when you rings its bell. He calls you Harvey as if we're divorced. He's our child, your flesh and blood created by the both of us. He sees all these other little boys whose dads pick them up wondering why his daddy isn't here to do that." Donna said raising her voice._

 _"I know I need to be a better dad…" he whispered, "and a better husband. And I will be. Once this is all settled down, I'm coming back—" It made Harvey's wife dissolve into tears. She leaned forward and put her face in her hands._

 _He pulled her into a hug, rubbed her arm and kissed the top of her head. Instead of refusing him, she let him hold her. He tried to pacify, "…Baby, come on."_

 _"Please. I can't do this anymore Harvey." Donna wept._

 _"You won't have to." Harvey peppered her with kisses on her cheek and neck. "Not anymore, Sweetheart." He kissed her palm. "Just let me do this last job. I promise Don."_

 _"If you feel obligated to do your job—then do it. Take the job." She said wiping her tears away from her cheeks. "But don't expect Patrick and me to be here when you get back."_

 _Harvey's face turned into someone experiencing pure horror as Donna pushed off from the bed and marched out of their room. "Donan." He called scolding her. "Donna," he flew into the hallway and grabbed her elbow, "Let's talk about this rationally—"_

 _"We've had enough talks about this." Donna's head tilted. It was when Harvey saw the way her eyes shined with tears of resolution. "It's time one of us did something to end it," that he got scared to death that she meant it this time._

 _"Donna, it's just one job." Harvey rasped, "Just wait for me one more…"_

 _Donna padded down the hall towards their son's room, "I need to bathe Patrick—"_

 _"Baby, please.—"_

 _"—and get him to bed before it gets too late/" Donna closed Patrick's door in Harvey's face and locked. His head slumped against the door and felt like banding his head on it repeatedly._

 _The man insisted after her, knocking. "Donna."_

* * *

For breakfast, Harvey settled on a porridge with blueberry compete, a berry omelette and an avocado and strawberry smoothie. Angela on the other hand had blueberry and lemon pancakes, fruit burst muffins with a tropical smoothie. They ate inside because it was much cooler with the air conditioning and the sun would have been shining directly onto their face.

Angela lifted her Polaroid camera and took a picture of him shoving a large bite of his berry omelette which caught him in a bad moment as the berry was dripping from the corner of his mouth as if a vampire and just bitten off a huge chunk of someone's neck. She handed the camera to Harvey and asked if he'd take a picture of her mouth trying to take a huge bite of her pancakes. He rolled his eyes as Angela sized up the stack of pancakes bigger than the size of her face as she instead put her face next to the pancakes and opened her mouth gasping at the size of it as Harvey perfectly took the picture.

"I found a recipe online we could try. It's—"

"What's the recipe?" Angela asked wondering why he paused for a moment with his smoothie still in his mouth.

He didn't answer and looked into Harvey's eyes who was completely focused on something behind her head. She tilted her head and he was still hypnotized by whatever got his complete and undivided attention.

She turned around on her stood and saw a pretty, wavy red headed woman with a boy holding her hand.

Harvey couldn't believe it. Out of all the cities that there is on Earth and out of the hundreds of cafe's in New York and years of trying to find her using the government database thanks to Benjamin she was here. They were here. Both Donna and Patrick. In front of his eyes. He tried to move his hand but he felt his hands go limb and were almost paralyzed. He placed his smoothie onto the floor and took in a few deep breaths not making it obvious to Angela as he finally looked at him.

"You want some chocolate doughnuts?" Harvey asked coming up with an excuse.

As soon as Angela nodded he was already out of his seat walking towards her as Angela turned around to watch was about to unfold.

"One apple juice, one lemon muffin and what else do you want?"

"I can't see up there," Patrick said. So Donna picked him up and set him on her hip, as they both stared at the hand drawn menu in front of them "That one."

"Okay, also one chocolate milk. And I'll have creamy mustard mushroom on toast and some blood orange juice."

Harvey swallowed hard and stood, combing back his hair using his hand with his hand shaking a little which shocked Angela at how nervous he was.

She laughed as she took out the money from her wallet, "I try not giving him enough sugar but he loves it!"

"But I always have BANANA!" The boy said in his minion impression.

"That explains why the boy's so full of energy." The cashier said laughing as he handed Donna her change who put it in her purse.

They both waited to the side letting the other customers order their food allowing Harvey to catch up with them. Seeing himself suffer like he did when Donna first left him made him eventually confront his fears. It made him stronger and taught him to love all life no matter what. He should have been better but now he learned his lesson. He had to be loving and merciful and because of that he gave himself an ideal to strive towards.

 _ **Once more into the fray  
**_ _ **Into the last good fight I'll ever know  
Live and die on this day**  
 **Live and die on this day**_

He reached his hand forward slowly grasped at her shoulder with anxiety, "Donna…"


	10. Can't Remember To Forget You

_**EXPECTATION**_

Donna froze on the spot as the sound of the voice she felt her blood being flooded with adrenaline that sped up her heart rate and made her hairs stand on their end in the situation she was in. She looked down at Patrick and gulped as she turned around to face him.

"Hey." Donna said awkwardly.

"Daddy?" Patrick asked looking up at him as Harvey kneeled down to face him.

"Hey buddy. Did you miss me?" Harvey asked looking at him as Patrick nodded.

"I did." Patrick said with a smile on his face.

"I missed you too buddy." Harvey said nodding his head and getting up to face Donna. "I thought you were never coming back."

Donna looked down onto the floor shaking her head as she put her hands in her pockets and then running a hand through her hair. "That's it? You don't wanna talk, or anything..."

"I can't." Donna replied lifting her head up to face his. "I have to go to work."

"So that means you're back for good?" Harvey asked looking into her eyes.

"I have something so say to you." Donna whispered as she began to shake her head feeling her eyes well up a little.

"All this time you were here." Harvey whispered back as she heard the pain in his voice.

"Harvey…I was going to say that I'm sorry that I left you. I missed everything about you. From the way you smile at me to the way I missed feeling your eyes when on me when I look away." Donna whispered letting a tear drip down her cheek.

"Then why'd you have to leave me like that for? There was always a part of me that believed that you came back but I didn't know it'd be this soon. We could have talked through it, you didn't have to stop me from seeing my son grow older or cut me off-"

"I want to come back home." Donna said placing her arms around Harvey's body and resting her face on top of his shoulder and weeping over his shirt whilst Angela smiled from her table.

"Let all your pain wash away Donna because I forgive you for leaving me. I want you to come home too." Harvey whispered back as he rested her head on her shoulder feeling himself relax for the first time in years as they both cried not caring that people were staring at each other.

 _ **REALITY**_

 ** _SOUNDTRACK: The Incredible Hulk - Lonely Man_**

"Excuse me?" The woman asked turning around surprised and looking at him confused.

 _It wasn't Donna_

Her eyes were blue, her chin stuck out a little more, she looked a little older, her chest was bigger and her lips were thicker. He removed his hands and put it inside his pocket. "Sorry...I thought you were somebody that I used to know."

The woman looked up at Harvey with a blank expression. "It was a honest mistake so it's cool. I've been told I have one of them faces anyway, the ones where you see five different people in."

"Yeah, I guess it must have been the coffee or something I'm not usually this off in the morning. You don't mind if I ask what your boy's called? It's just that i have a son too," Harvey asked looking down at the boy and staring at his brown eyes like Donna's.

"Oliver." The woman said smiling.

"That's a nice name and he's really well behaved. Sorry for disturbing you." Harvey said turning on his heel and returning to his seat across Angela.

"What was the recipe you were talking about?" Angela asked trying to distract his attention as he looked extremely visibly hurt.

"Oh," Harvey remembered himself and tried to brush it off his shoulders. "Seared steak with celery & pepper caponata."

"Sounds yummy." Angela said smiling trying to get him to smile but he gazed at his omlettes as she knew that he probably didn't want to talk to anyone as she wanted to be left alone with this thoughts and memories.

* * *

" _I know why you keep taking your business trips." Donna said as Harvey stopped walking from the door and dropping his suitcase to turn around and face her._

" _What are you talking about?"_

" _You can't handle the fact that Casey died here. You're still not over it." Donna said timidly as Harvey walked towards her._

" _This has nothing to do with-"_

" _It has every god damn thing to do with Casey!" Donna said raising her voice. Harvey walked towards her and was about to put her hands on her shoulders._

" _Donna I need you too-"_

" _If you touch me I'll fucking scream!" Donna shouted as Harvey put his hands away. "Why do you have to leave us all the time? We could talk about this."_

" _Donna it's been three years since Casey died. I've gone over-"_

" _Don't you dare lie to me!" Donna said spitting venom and pointing a finger at him._

" _What do you want me to do then? You want to go back to Dr Agard? Tell her everything that happened so she can prescribe me some antidepressants that'll fuck up the way I think?" Harvey asked looking down at her._

" _I don't want you to go away. That's all." Donna said simply._

" _Don't you want me to go and earn some money to pay the fucking bills around here? I have to pay the bills, pay for the electricity, water, rent, car insurance, even for you god damn French classes and-"_

" _That's because we agreed to do that. We agreed that I would stop working to take care of the kids so don't blame this on me!" Donna said raising her voice._

" _We agreed to do this because you wanted a baby in the first place; not me! I didn't want Patrick or Casey!" Harvey said shouting as the both of them paused._

" _You didn't want Patrick?" Donna asked croaking as a tear fell down her face._

" _I didn't mean it like that Donn-"_

" _What the fuck am I here doing in this house if you hate me that much!" Donna barked as Harvey looked terrified, she never shouted at him that much._

" _I don't hate-"_

" _Fuck you, you shallow piece of shit! Why the fuck did you even agree to have a baby if you didn't even want one." Donna took off her wedding ring showing it to him. "Why did you agree to marry me if you didn't want a family?" She threw the wedding ring at him as he failed to catch it._

" _Donna-"_

" _Get the fuck out and go on your stupid fucking business trip and here's some money." Donna said taking out her purse and throwing bills towards him. "Hire a whore and fuck whoever you want. I never want to see your face again." She shouted slamming the door in front of his face as she ran towards her bedroom and sobbed quietly._

* * *

After she finished eating she carefully placed her photos inside the outside zip of her backbag to stop them from getting crushed from her trainers as she finished her smoothie, wiping the corner of her mouth with some tissue. She threw her wrappers in the bins and began washing her hands using the sink at the back of the room as Harvey finally got up not bothering with his food.

They stopped by the walk as there were a bunch of Chinese and Honduran tourists taking pictures of New York City with their camel packs as they sucked their drink on this hot day of New York, perfect for tourism. She looked up to see how Harvey was doing and his eyes still weren't relaxed after he'd come back to sit with her.

Angela moved her hand towards his and held it.

Harvey was pulled out his train of thought and looked down at Angela's hand slipping into his and then back up at her to see her consoling him with a smile. She gently squeezed her hand and knew what she wanted because it's what Patrick would do. He knew that she needed someone to love her as much as he needed someone to love him.

"Uncle Harvey, what's lost is lost." Angela said as Harvey nodded. "I know you'll never get your wife back but you've done good so far. Don't let it get to you after all these years." She spoke and he felt himself melt inside with emotion.

Harvey shook his head returned the little girl's smile and gave her hand a small squeeze. "It'll take about an hour to make the steak because I've never made stake before."

"You sure you can handle the challenge?" Angela asked smiling as they crossed the street and following the crowd.

"You can only learn from your mistakes."

* * *

 _Harvey stared at the front door of his apartment and hesitated to knock. He knew that Donna was in a bad mood and if he knocked then there was a high chance that she wouldn't open it so he decided to do the logical thing which was to take out the keys from his pocket and open the door._

 _He slowly opened it and saw a fort made out of pillows. He smiled to himself as he shut the door behind and placed his black trench coat on the coat rack and placed his briefcase on the floor. He walked forward slowly and saw Donna sleeping on the couch with Patrick on top of her, his face buried in the crook of Donna's neck._

 _He watched them for a few minutes and saw how their chest rise and fall, lost in their own dreams powered by their subconscious and imagination. Slowly, he placed his hands around Patrick and picked him up and Patrick groggily groaned but fell back to sleep placing his head on Harvey's shoulder as he put him to sleep in his bed._

 _He went back and kneeled in front of Donna and stared under her eyes. He saw light circles forming and it was wet with fresh tears. He managed to pick her up bridal style as she subconsciously placed her arms around his neck. He stopped in his tracks to see whether she'd woken up but she turned her head towards his chest as he heard her breathing._

" _Please….come back. Don't want you to go." Donna whispered in her sleep as Harvey looked down at her sadly. He slowly placed her on their bed but she wouldn't let go of her hands so they fell asleep in that position._

* * *

When Angela's training session was finished, Harvey was _bombarded_ by three little girls. One of them being Angela and the other two Harvey knew was Claudia and Becky. "Uncle Harvey?"

"I'm not ready to be taken to your leader!" Harvey said raising his hands.

"Claudia and Becky's moms are taking them to the museum and they asked if I—we—could come." The little girl bit her lip.

"What exhibition?" Harvey asked realising that it wasn't going to be a sex exhibition because it'd be weird if it was _(yes they exist!)_

"Native Americans! You know the true Americans? You know the ones we kicked out? Can we go? Pretty pretty please? With a cupcake, placed on top of a Belgian triple chocolate cake pleeeaaassssseee?" Angela asked shaking his blazer with the other two girls getting ready to explode.

"That's a lot of diabetes we're gonna get but yeah. I guess we're going to see a bunch of Europeans beat Red Indians?." Harvey said smiling.

"Yes!" Angela punched the air and then high fived her friends. Claudia and Becky went back to their parents as they decided to meet up at the museum.

He called Gretchen and asked her to cancel any appointments that he was going to be out for the rest of the day in which she quickly agreed to clear his schedule because she knew she'd be spending time with Angela. He admired her honesty when she commented on the fact that he was doing a good job at raising her...or maybe she wanted a raise.

"Harvey?"

Harvey turned around to see Rose walking towards her smiling. He smiled back and noticed how her hair was more wavy than usual and she wore red lipstick which made her look...hot.

"Coach Dunne." Harvey smiled back.

"Please, call me Rose. You don't mind if I speak to you for a moment?" Rose asked.

"I don't. You wanna sit down Angela?" Harvey asked looking at the seating area.

"Sure. Just don't take long." Angela asked walking towards the seating area

"So what is it?" Harvey asked.

"I know I shouldn't be asking this but I heard the girls were going to the museum and really wanted to go and I heard you were going so...you wanna go with me too?" Rose asked smiling.

"Sure. Just wear something appropriate. I don't want you looking like a PE teacher who teaches a little bit of geography on the side" Harvey asked with a cheeky smile.

"Great...erm we'll meet there." Rose said turning around and walking back to the changing room.

* * *

 _"The term "Indian" originated with Christopher Columbus. He thought that he had reached the East Indies when he landed in America and therefore named the inhabitants Indians." The tour leader said taking the kids around as their minds were blown._

"So that's why they're called Indians." Becky said in awe as she looked around at the paintings.

"It's pretty interesting isn't it?" Rose asked looking down at her black dress and adjusting it a little.

"What's interesting?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"That we can't even call ourselves true Americans. That we're basically Europeans who decided to be dicks and almost kill an entire race." Rose said putting her hands in the pockets of her jacket and staring at a painting of _The Battle Of The Wounded Knee_.

"According to scientists we're all Africans. So we're African Apes who become Europeans then Americans." Harvey said looking at the same picture.

"Someone's a future biologist." Rose said looking at him weirdly.

"Only lecture I listened in Biology." Harvey said sighing.

"Why only that lecture?" Rose asked curiously.

"Embarrassed myself by getting caught sending notes to a girl that had an explicit word." Harvey said smirking.

"You were sexting in class?" Rose asked shocked as they moved on the exhibition.

"It's not sexting if there's no texting which tells you how old I am. I don't know what we would have called it back then?" Harvey said looking at her and staring at her body.

"Is this a date?" Rose asked looking at the floor biting her lip and back up at Harvey raising her eyebrow.

"It's whatever you want it to be. You want it to be a date?" Harvey asked.

"I don't really know. I haven't done this since...yeah." Rose said not trying to remember her dead husband.

"I haven't dated since my divorce so I'm on the wavelength as you I guess." Harvey said trying to comfort her.

"Can we go in the tent?" Angela asked running towards them. Harvey looked at them and saw a Native American house that was triangular in shape but large enough to fit about 10 people.

"Sure, just don't pick up the wood pieces or else it'll fall down and we'll all get kicked out and arrested for some sort of racism." Harvey said.

Angela looked confused at first but smiled as she ran in with Becky and Claudia along with their parents.

"You wanna talk about this later?" Harvey asked putting his hands in his pockets.

"Later?" Rose asked blushing a little waiting for him to say it.

"Dinner." Harvey said blushing a little.

"I see what you did there Specter. What you gonna about Angela though?" Rose asked signalling towards the tent. Harvey looked forward to see her taking photos of them with her polaroid camera.

"She can stay at one of theirs I guess. She hasn't had a sleepover yet but I'm pretty sure she'd love to have one before she goes back." Harvey said and nodding his head.

* * *

Harvey and Rose entered the Asian-fusion restaurant as the both of them made their way towards seat. The red neon lights illuminated the restaurant along with the yellow lights that added to the texture of the lighting.

"This place is amazing. I've wanted to come here for so long." Rose said looking around.

"Yeah, me too." Harvey said looking around at the neon lights.

"Really? It's the best. And the bartender here is supposed to be incredible." Rose said smiling.

"Yeah, you took a few classes in mixology, right?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"How did you know?" Rose asked shocked biting her lip slightly.

"Seemed to make a big fuss out of it when you got into a fight with that other bartender on Twitter." Harvey said checking the time on his watch.

"You read my tweets?" Rose asked blushing and smiling.

"It comes up on my feed so of course." Harvey said smiling back.

"Did you look that up? That's so sweet. You're so romantic." Rose said as Harvey smiled awkwardly.

"Wanna get a drink?" Harvey asked as they made their way towards the bartender.

"Yes, let's go!"

 _ **Two hours later**_

Both of them are pretty drunk with lots of food drinks and plates on their table. Rose looks like she's about to get fully drunk but Harvey is holding his nerve much better.

"How is it that you're not drunk?" Rose asked.

"I have the liver of an Irishman." Harvey said patting where his liver would be.

"No fair, I'm the athlete here. My liver should be like a God's. Like Buddha' or Jesus' or Bear Grylls'" Rose said slurring some of her words.

"Anyway I'm trying to get this little kid to help me find my ship so I can get off the planet and go home. But he's such a little fucker, I want to kill him." Harvey said upset remembering the game he's been playing when he gets bored at work.

"No way." Rose said laughing.

"But at the same time I really love him which is weird. But he's so lonely. It's like he doesn't have any parents or anyone to take care of him." Harvey said laughing at himself.

Rose laughed as well flirtatiously as she grabbed his hand and her fingernails pressed slightly into his skin. He looked down to study her long, red painted fingernails.

"You're remind me of this little puppy I rescued in Boston last year. And he was so fucking cute, and he just wanted to be hugged all the time. He was so cuddly." Rose said leaning forward. "But so horny!" She said whispering. "But anyway, what kind of animal would you say I am?"

"I don't know. Maybe a tiger." Harvey said casually.

"A tiger; really?" Rose said growling like one and scratching the air with her fingernails. "I'm sorry, am I being crazy? I do that when I'm this drunk, and I'm rarely drunk just to rub salt on the wounds."

"Yes."

"Am I? I'm sorry! I'm just a little drunk and I'm having a good time with you. I'm having a really lovely evening." Rose said taking another sip of her drink.

"I'm having a really good time too...wait a second. Hang on a moment. I don't wanna be a puppy. That's like being a wet noodle or something." Harvey said putting his hands up questioning her logic.

"Fuck you, puppies are amazing." Rose said showing him her puppy eyes.

"But I wanna be a dragon that can rip you to pieces and destroy you... but I won't." Harvey said taking his sip of Bourbon.

"No, don't! Don't. You can be my dragon." Rose said smiling.

They walk up a pedestrian overpass overlooking cars and city lights. Rose bumped into him lightly as Harvey bumped back. She bumped into him again and suddenly he grabs her and lifts her off her feet, spinning her around. She squealed laughing as he placed his lips against her and kissed her. She moaned a little as she kissed back putting her hands on his face. She smelled like tequila and peach which was different to what Donna smelled like when she was drunk but the smell was too irresistible. After a minute of making out, she stopped and looked at him.

"No tongue you naughty dog." Rose said with a small smile.

"We're good." Harvey said lifting her face up using his finger and placed his hand on her back as she put her lips on his as he tried not to use his tongue.

He pushed her against the wall and started to dominate her. He tried kissing her better with his lips pulling her hair back. She slid her hands down his pants as Harvey moaned slightly. Rose looked up at him and stopped kissing her.

"Wait, you're not gonna fuck me and then not call me like the other guys, are you?" Rose said looking up at him.

"No, not at all... I..."

"When am I gonna see you again?" Rose asked.

"When I pick up Angela." Harvey said putting her hands on her hips as she pushed her hips away.

"What about when you don't pick me Angela?"

"I don't know...I'm usually at work...but...um..." Harvey said lost for words as he looked at his lips smeared with her lipstick.

"You know, at this age, I feel like I can't let you waste my time if you don't have the ability to be serious." Rose said putting her hands in her pockets and taking out her wallet.

"Do you wanna be serious?" Harvey asked.

"I don't know...fuck and you've got a kid too! I'm gonna call it a night. I don't want to talk about this." Rose said almost crying as she called for a taxi.

Harvey stood on the spot and wanted to punch himself in the face as he ruined his chances with her; and he didn't know what to do as he made his way to Claudia's house to collect Angela.

He got into his car and relaxed a little. He opened the window as he began to drive to Claudia's house using the sat nav. He pressed his clutch down and slowly tapped his break to stop his car for a stop. He tapped on the steering wheel then he heard the sound of a crunch. He looked at his passenger seat and saw something covering a blanket which made him jump. Someone was under the blanket.

"I'm calling the police if you don't-"

"Uncle Harvey it's me."

Harvey viciously took the blanket off and saw Angela on her iPad watching Willie Wonka And The Chocolate Factory with a soda and potato chips in her hands.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Harvey asked almost shouting.

"I wanted to see where you were going." Angela said pausing her movie and sitting on the passenger seat.

"You could have been killed. What if something happened to you?!" Harvey asked driving forward angry at her.

"But nothing happened." Angela said defending herself.

"I would know if nothing happened to you if you were at Claudia's house." Harvey said slowly calming down.

"I didn't want-"

"We're not talking about this. What if you-fuck!" Harvey said quickly stopping at the old man half way across the road who look prettified like he saw the face of death.

"You can't do that again Angela. I need to know that you're fine. My mother, she never cared about me like your mom cared about you." Harvey said as he carried on driving.

"What do you mean?" Angela asked looking at her guilty at what she did.

"She didn't love my dad like your dad loved your mom. She let other men take control of her and because of that she never had any time for me. She'd send me and your dad away to our Aunt Sarah's house; she practically raised us. I lost Patrick and Donna because I did what my mother did. I never cared about the people who truly loved me and because of that I lost my mother, my wife and my son. I have no family left; you're the only family I've got. I can't lose you." Harvey said stopping outside his apartment and killing his engine.

"I'm sorry I didn't think-"

"It's okay Angela. It's better to make mistakes when you're younger compared to when you're older. When you're young and you never make that mistake again then it'll you a better person. Make a similar mistake when you're older then there's no second chances. Just consequences."

* * *

Harvey walked towards his study and opened his bookcase to sort out his books. He began by placing his novels at the top shelf, then music albums which took half an hour because he wanted to place them in alphabetical order. He looked up at the time and saw that it was 11 in the evening. He quickly sorted out his work document in the third shelf with the last shelf being reserved for his old photos which roughly stacked. When he thought he was finished he looked back to see a book case that he hadn't seen in years.

He took the book case and sat onto the bed where he slowly opened it and saw a stash of photos of Donna and Patrick. The first picture he saw was when Donna decided to make cupcakes and cover both of their faces with flour. He saw how his smiling face was covered with flour and a little chocolate thanks to Patrick with Donna sticking her tongue out and making her eyes a little cockeyed with Patrick at the bottom giggling.

There was another picture where the three of them were wearing their Yankees caps when they took Patrick to his first game against the Red Sox.

There was one of Donna asleep sitting up on the couch with a newborn Patrick asleep in her arms. He could remember taking them pictures like they were yesterday. He could remember every detail, sound, emotion he felt when capturing them moment but the more he thought about them the sadder he became.

"The more I stare at you, the more pain I remember you gave me." Harvey whispered to himself and staring at Donna's face. "And it's not your fault...but I have to let you all go."

He placed the photos inside a box full of Donna's memento as he picked the box up and took it to the living room placing it on the floor next to the fire place. He sat down and took out a hair brush that had a few red hair strands on there. He took out a few strands of hair and slowly held it over the fire and watched it shrivel and disappear. He then threw the brush in the fire and watched how the fire grew larger and how the brush started to burn. All them hours of brushing her hair were all gone.

Then came the sad part where he took out a bunch of photos with Donna and Patrick as he threw one into the fire and watched the picture burn around Donna's face. He continued to throw the pictures into the fire until he reached the last one.

It was the picture he took when they were in Switzerland. "Why can't I forget you? I can't remember to forget you." He whispered throwing the photo into the flame as he stared into it lost in his thoughts letting time pass.

 **One hour later**

He entered his room and noticed a piece of paper on the floor next to the foot of the bed. He walked towards it and kneeled down to stare at a note in blue ink that she'd right with her pink pen with a pink fur at the end...it was her handwriting.

It was the last note of hers, her last thoughts.

He read the note in his head over and over with his eyes welling up slowly...

He fell asleep holding the note under his pillow.


	11. Truth & Consequences

Harvey decided to go to pick up Angela early so he could diffuse the ticking time bomb that was the night before with Rose. He wanted to go through what happened and he didn't want to ruin their relationship, even if they didn't want one.

He made his way to the pitch and was surprised to see her sitting on the bench instead of standing and giving her instruction as he was used to seeing her. She was an animated coach who demanded the girls play in her philosophy of possession based soccer but with fast paced passing which would benefit them as the other teams would be forced to defend in their box and make mistakes by leaving gaps in their defense.

Rose turned her head and saw Harvey as he nodded looking back at her as she turned her head back to focus back onto her team training.

"Claudia, add less pace and more spin on that through ball next time. Lean your body back so you can apply some backspin. That way the ball falls perfectly in Becky's feet." Rose said pointing at her and then taking a sip of her banana milkshake.

"Is that for the hangover?" Harvey asked looking at her.

Rose looked up and looked back at the kids. "Yeah, how'd you know? I could be just yearning for a banana milkshake for the sake of it."

"It's what I have to cure my hangovers too. Plus it's got Prozac so you can't be mad at me. No one can mad actually that's the point of Prozac. I know because they put it in my antidepressants." Harvey said taking a seat next to her and rubbing his hands.

"I thought you had the liver of an Irishman and wouldn't need something to cure your hangover. And I'm sorry to hear you were on antidepressants." Rose said rolling her eyes.

"I do get hangovers. I'm only human but with a great liver but besides that it's not like I'm not the Flash or anything. I don't faster than the speed of lightning or have fast metabolism." Harvey said shaking his head.

"Captain America has fast metabolism and he's not fast at all." Rose said correcting her.

"I'm just glad you weren't blindly drunk if you heard my Irishman line but you're right about Captain America. Lucky bastard." Harvey said nodding his head.

"Is that a compliment?" Rose asked finally looking at him.

"It's whatever you want it to be." Harvey said turning her head and looking at her.

"There you go again with the mystery James Dean day dream look in your eyes. And yes I do listen to Taylor Swift but don't judge me...but you've already done that." Rose said sighing.

"James Dean has fuck all on me." Harvey said smirking.

"He did make jeans famous so I guess he wins in life." Rose said shrugging and taking another sip of her milkshake.

"Can we talk about what happened?" Harvey asked changing the subject.

"Yeah about that. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said any of that." Rose said shaking her head and looking down onto the floor.

"I shouldn't have put my hands in your pants." Harvey said looking at Angela running towards the goalkeeper and chipping it over her but going just over.

"Good try Angela." Rose said clapping her hands. Angela looked towards her smiling and saw Harvey sitting next to her which distracted her for a minute as Becky shouted at her to defend as the other team began to attack their side.

"I'm not ready to be in a relationship." Harvey stated plainly.

Rose sighed as she rubbed her face and turned her face to face Harvey.

"I was going to say the same thing. But I don't want us to be strangers anymore." Rose said smiling a little.

"Why do you wanna still be friends?" Harvey asked confused.

"We've both been through a lot of shit and I need people who don't make me feel alone. Because being with people who make you feel alone is worse than sitting alone in your house listening to Buddy Rich with a glass of red wine to drink all to yourself." Rose said smiling to herself.

"You'll find someone; you're too good looking." Harvey said smirking with made Rose smile and blush a little.

"I know. I guess I need to start exploring or something." Rose said shrugging her shoulders as she blew her whistle to signal for the children to stop training and return to the changing rooms.

"You still have my number, right?" Harvey asked.

"I do. And thanks for not freaking out last night when I wasn't myself." Rose said shaking her head.

"Maybe you actually showed your true self last night and there's nothing to be embarrassed about who we are. You need to be yourself when you met the person you're destined for so they can fall in love with your weaknesses too." Harvey said as the both of them watched the girls train.

* * *

" _Donna. I'm back." Harvey said knocking on their bedroom door and trying to open it. "Look can we talk about this like adults?"_

 _No response_

" _Donna…we need to speak eventually. We can't do this forever, the last thing we need is Patrick to think there's something wrong between us." Harvey said as he rested his forehead against the door._

 _Still no response._

" _Look I gotta go to work…so just call. I just want to hear your voice call my name and I need to know that you've got everything under control." Harvey said hoping she's speak to him once last time before he turned away._

 _The sound of the door knob turning made Harvey pause on his track as the door opened. He turned his back slowly to see Donna wearing her red panties and bra._

 _ **Few moments later**_

 _"Where do you want it." Harvey moaned whispering into her ear._

" _Inside me." Donna pretended to moan back as Harvey released inside her._

 _She noticed that ever since he came back, he just uses her for sex. They weren't enjoying it like they used too and it felt robotic from both of their parts. There wasn't the fire that was there from the first time they had sex in Donna's apartment to the time when they told each other 'I love you'._

 _She thought that she had no other purpose for him but to take care of Patrick and sex…like she never existed._

 _She tried so many times to tell him but she never that he wouldn't listen. His trips became more frequent despite how many times he assured her that it was the last time and he'd started listening to her less and less._

 ** _Their marriage was falling apart._**

* * *

"Uncle Harvey. I made you a surprise." Angela said as she began to open her bag.

"What is it?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Close your eyes." Angela said turning her back away.

"Okay." Harvey said closing his eyes but opening his right one a little slightly as he tried to look over her shoulder.

"Uncle Harvey. I can see you through the mirror in front of me. Stooppp." Angela said looking at Harvey through the mirror.

Harvey looked at himself in the mirror and rolled his eyes as he put his hands on his eyes to cover his vision.

"So Coach Dunne took us to a pottery place this morning because of how good we've been playing but first I want to make you some coffee." Angela said taking out the mug she made for Harvey.

"Coffee?" Harvey asked taking his hands off. "Aren't you supposed to say tea because you've been living in England?"

"No Uncle Harvey don't look." Angela said quickly as Harvey figured out what she made for him. "And you like coffee, so it makes sense I make you coffee."

"Do you know how to make coffee?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"Do you have a Keuring?" Angela asked saying the word slowly.

"You mean a Keaurig?" Harvey asked collecting her.

"I'm sorry if you're a spelling champion. Do I look German?" Angela asked sarcastically. "I mean some words I don't understand, like why does the word efficiency have two f's? It defeats the purpose of the word."

"Cabinet under left of the sink." Harvey said. "And maybe you should speak to someone who speaks latin why that's the case."

"You secretly love when I complain Uncle Harvey." Angela said giggling as she walked to the kitchen.

"But it might be-"

"Don't look." Angela said shielding her mug as she quickly ran towards the kitchen with her back facing Harvey.

Angela placed the mug onto the kitchen counter as she opened the cabinet for the Keurig. She managed to placed the Keurig onto the counter as she plugged it into the socket.

"Cream, two sugars too." Harvey said.

"I know Uncle Harvey." Angela said rolling her eyes. She took the stood and placed in onto the floor so she could sit onto the counter that was too tall for her to sit down.

"Make sure you put the sugar first and then-"

"I know Uncle Harvey!" Angela said smiling as she began to make the coffee.

"And make sure-"

"I'll put poison in and kill you if you don't stop!" Angela yelled.

She started to pour the coffee from the machine to the mug and began to mix it putting two sugars inside the mug and then adding the cream. She took out a piece of tissue paper and began to wrap it under the mug to make sure she wouldn't burn herself or leave it wet as it'd leave a mark on Uncle Harvey's coffee table.

She jamp of the kitchen counter and took the mug and walked towards the door.

"Close your eyes!" Angela said as Harvey rolled his eyes and covered his eyes with his hands.

She took a few more steps and stood in front of him as she smiled. "Open your hands."

"Is it hot?" Harvey asked curiously.

"No, I'm giving you cold coffee." Angela said sarcastically as Harvey took his hands out and felt the mug in his hands with his eyes still closed.

The mug feel smooth which impressed him at how professional it felt. It was like it was out of a company that specialised in coffee mug. He opened his eyes and smiled as she saw a black shiny mug with collared white shirt and a black bow tie. The handle was painted so that it resembled a sleeve with the shirt cuff showing.

"What do you think?" Angela asked innocently.

"It's now my favorite mug." Harvey said smirking as he began to sip the coffee from it.

"YES! I KNEW YOU'D LOVE IT!" Angela said slowly hugging him as he hugged back with one hand with his coffee mug hand raised to the side to prevent the coffee from hitting her.

* * *

Harvey woke up and looked at the time and saw it was one in the morning. He put his hand under the bed and stared at the same note from Donna and curiously heard the TV from Angela's room.

He opened his door slowly and tip toed he way down the hallway and saw the light appearing from the bottom of Angela's room with the sound of the crowd from the TV; she was watching a soccer match.

Harvey walked towards the door and opened his slowly. "Angela, why is the TV on?"

He looked forward and didn't see her on the bed. Angela then popped her head up from the side of her bed and smiled as she only him to see only her head.

"I've got a friendly tomorrow and I was just-erm practicing." Angela said giving a fake smile.

"Is it against that New York team?" Harvey asked.

"No this is the one against that team from Boston. The New York team was next week. Apparently there's this big rivalry between both team and Coach Dunne told us the atmosphere will be more than just a friendly. You're coming to watch us play, aren't you?" Angela asked tilting her head.

"Of course Angie; I wouldn't miss it. Plus you're gonna make the team anyway, why would you need to practice...without a soccer ball?" Harvey asked walking towards her.

"Don't look here." Angela said quickly sliding her book under the bed and standing up showing him that she was wearing her USWNT soccer top.

"You should be in bed if you wanna guarantee you'll be in the team." Harvey said grabbing the remote from the bed and turning it off.

"But they were showing the Cristiano Ronaldo documentary." Angela said pouting.

"They're showing it all week. You can watch it anytime." Harvey said pulling her comforter towards the end of the bed and pointing to her bed.

"You're ruining my life." Angela said crossing her arms.

"I mean it." Harvey said sternly with his inner fatherhood coming out.

Angela obediently took off her USWNT top and placed it neatly onto the chair as she crawled onto her bed and switched the lamp off.

"Night Angela." Harvey said turning the room lights off.

"Night Uncle Harvey." Angela said.

* * *

The day of Angela's friend arrived and Harvey woke up to the usual sound of his alarm. He woke up and heard the TV on from the living room. He got up curiously and saw that she was watching Premier League soccer highlights and eating breakfast.

"Was there something about the sunshine that woke you up?" Harvey asked smiling.

Angela looked back and she began to smile creepily as she couldn't stay still on her seat. "I can't wait. I'm gonna bite their necks so they won't speak in there stupid Boston accent, break their legs and decimate their backs!"

"Angela, you seem a little..."

"Excited? Estatic? Joyful? Maybe I just can't wait to kiss their asses? Maybe I'll run across the pitch shouting 'I'M A VAMPIRE! I'M A VAMPIRE! I'M A VAMPIRE!' I mean if I got arrested they wouldn't know what file to put it in. Even if it was in alphabetical order. You know ABCDEFG...HIJKLMNOP...QRSTUVWXYZ! VIV LA FUCKING FRANCE MAN!" Angela asked giving him adjectives.

Confused, Harvey looked at the table to see two mugs of coffee finished and looked back at her shocked. "How much coffee did you have?"

"Coffee? Oh I had about four mugs...or is it cups? What's the difference? I don't know? Maybe it's a metric system problem? Maybe the Americans call it cups? Or mugs? I want to go to LA to find David Beckham's house and kidnap him as my bunny. He's so adorable! This feeling doesn't go goooo away! THAT GOT DAMN ASSKICKING IS GOING TO BE IN THEM FUCKING FILES!" Angela said jumping as Harvey began to grab her to calm her down a little.

"Angela..."

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gone crazy like that but I wanted to take coffee like you made it. Next thing I knew sip turned into a taste and turned into-"

"Okay calm down. As long as you score a hat-trick, you can drink as much...well half a cup of coffee. I mean if you do score three goals with coffee then we can make some money out of this." Harvey said smiling to himself.

"I'm not a product so you can exploit! But thanks anyway." Angela said giving him a warm smile.

"Are you nervous?" Harvey asked putting his hands on her shoulders.

"Should I be nervous?" Angela asked looking up at him.

"Sometimes nerves brings out the best in people." Harvey commented.

"Well I'm not nervous at all!" Angela said folding her and putting her chin up!

* * *

Harvey sat onto the stands and texted Jessica that he was going to be late because of Angela's match which she acknowledged straight away. He sat on the front row as parents began to fill out the stands. He was surprised to see how many people came, it must have been about 50 odd people surrounding the green grass.

He then saw the opposition team coming out from one side of the bench as the wore on green. He then turned his head to see Angela come with the rest of her team.

"Nervous?"

Harvey turned to his side and saw Rose sitting next to her with her notebook and pen. "Shouldn't you be on the touch line?"

"They know my philosophy perfectly. When the other team changes their shape then it is up to the captain to change our shape so they don't do anything. And the players have to develop their own understanding of the game." Rose said rolling eyes as she stood up as the opposing coach in her soccer cap shook hands with her and made her way to her touchline.

"You don't seem to be a fan of hers." Harvey said signalling to her.

"Let's say she's an arrogant bitch."

The music starts to play as the crowd starts to chant their song which could be heard from outside of the stadium like you were watching a game of Borussia Dortmund or Galatasaray. Red flares are been lit up from all corners of the stadium as the fans start to chant _'Someone's gonna kill ya'!'_ which start to frighten the Boston fans. The Boston fans tried to sing their song but they were being cut off by the home fans clapping and singing. This was more than just a friendly soccer match, it was war!

* * *

 _ **5 minutes:**_ Claudia chips the ball over the defender as Angela runs behind the defender as she managed to shoot from the right side of the box but her effort being saved by the goalkeeper.

"That was close." Harvey said putting his hands on his head.

"Like what you see?" Rose asked looking at him curiously.

"I do."

 ** _12 minutes:_** Angela puts in a dangerous looking tackle in her own box as the opposition's striker clearly dives. The other teams players start to surround the referee appealing for a penalty but the referee shakes her head as the Boston fans start to boo the referee in full force. Angela picks up the player that dived and looked up at her.

"HAVE YOU EVER BEEN DRAGGED TO THE SIDEWALK AND BEATEN UNTIL YOU'VE...PISSED BLOOD YOU DIVING BITCH?!" Angela shouts as the players start to seperate the both of them.

"What the hell just happened?" Rose asked.

"She tasted coffee for the once time. I guess you're not you when you're hungry. Luckily I bought a snickers bar just in case." Harvey said shaking his head.

 _ **20 minutes:**_ The goalkeeper takes five steps back before launching the ball towards the opponent's half. The ball bounces awkwardly for the defender as Angela found herself beating the defender as she turned her body to the left to support her stronger right foot to slot the ball around the goalkeeper. Angela closed her fists as she began to run towards the goalkeeper who were jumping and singing as she skid her knees through the grass. The team ran towards the goalkeeper as they began to jump on top of her. **1-0!**

The fans start to explode at first blood and begin to sing Angela's name along with extra loud clapping that echoed through the stadium.

"Good goal." Rose said shouting at them and clapping.

"Now I can see why you picked her." Harvey said smiling.

"If only you knew."

 _ **33 minutes:**_ Becky passes it to Angela who passes it to Claudia as Becky takes the ball off her as Angela and Claudia make a run. Becky does well to hold the ball as she passes it down to Angela who sees Claudia makes a run beating the two defenders as she does a perfect through ball towards her. The opposition defenders start to chase Claudia as she goes onto goal. She sees Angela behind as and back heels it to her and feeds the ball to Becky who cheekily chips the goalkeeper. Becky runs towards Angela as she jumps onto her as they hug shouting in excitement. **2-0!**

 ** _65 minutes:_** The opposition free kick takes hits the wall as Becky gives a through ball to Angela who finds acres of space as she uses her space to outrun two defenders on her right side. She sees Claudia free on her right as she does a chop to make the defender in front of her fall down as she sees two defenders in front of her. She manages to squeeze the ball between them as Claudia takes the ball and hits it first time beating the goalkeeper. She runs towards Angela who puts on leg onto the bed and bending her knee as Claudia puts her trainer on Angela's thigh as Angela pretends to polish it rubbing it into the opponent. **3-0!**

The crowd start to explode again silencing the away fans as they shake their heads.

 _ **Soundtrack: Hans Zimmer: An Ideal Of Hope (from 1:30 onwards)**_

 ** _90 minutes:_** The opponent's throwing gets intercepted from Becky who makes a run along the wing. She cuts it onto her favourite left foot as Angela who's in the box waits for the ball.

 _"You can do this." Angela's mother said as she helped her get up slowly onto her feet._

 _"But mommy, I can't kick with my heel on the floor." Angela said looking up at her mother looking concerned._

 _"You've got this!" Angela's mother said holding her tightly by her shoulder._

 _"What if I fail?" Angela asked concerned._

 _"But what if you fly? One day you'll make a choice and decide what kind of woman you'll be. Whoever that woman is, they're going to change the world. So don't think about whether you're going to fail. Think about whether you want to become something more than a woman; a legend Angela."_

She managed to lift herself off her feet and lift her feet over her body connecting her ankle onto the ball with the ball sailing into the top left corner of the net.

"HOLY SHIT!" Rose said jumping and running along the touchline as the whole team began to run towards Angela who was on the floor. Rose picked up Angela and kissed her on her cheek as the both of the shout at each other confirming the team's victory. **4-0!**

Flares start to be shooting from the home side as they start to chant their songs and clap their hands causing the Boston fans to still stay and remain loyal to their teams.

* * *

After the match ended, Angela was handed the match ball because she won Woman Of The Match. After the celebrations Harvey took her ball and placed it into the trunk of his car along with with her bag.

"Looks like the coffee helped." Harvey said smiling as he shut the trunk.

"I think it was something more than that." Angela said as she opened the door to the passenger seat.

"You wanna talk about what it was?" Harvey asked.

"Not really?" Angela said shutting the door and putting her seat belt on.

"You usually don't put your seat belt on so something must be bothering you? What is it Angela?" Harvey said getting into the car and shutting his door.

"It was...a memory. Of my mom. My earliest one actually. She was the one who got me into soccer so I guess I remembered her when I scored that goal." Angela said looking down onto the floor.

"Hey, look at me." Harvey said as Angela slowly looked at him. "We're in this together now. You know you can tell me anything."

"I wish I could tell you that but no one speaks about you back at home." Angela said sighing.

"They don't?" Harvey asked surprised.

"You never came to visit. Not once. Not even in the old videos of mom and dad. You weren't there and they never talked about you as if you were the man who wasn't there." Angela said sounding upset.

"I'm sorry Angela. I know I should have visited Marcus more but I couldn't go back." Harvey said.

"Why not?" Angela asked curiously.

"You sure you wanna know?" Harvey asked.

"It's like you said, we're in this together." Angela said smiling a little.

"I...I got our parents divorced." Harvey said looking outside and seeing the other children being collected by their kids. "I never expected to tell this to anyone yet alone my niece."

"How'd your parents get divorced?" Angela asked with her attention fully on her.

"My mom cheated on my dad. Once my mom left us I realised the timing was horrible. Dad wouldn't come out the house because he had nothing left, he'd just quit his job playing in the band and Marcus had nothing. I left Marcus and Dad in the worst situation and to make things worse I found a place but it was away from home and I never went back." Harvey said putting his hands in his pocket.

"How'd dad die?" Angela asked.

"What?" Harvey asked looking at her trying to comprehend what she just asked.

"Mom told me it was an accident but I wanna know how he died." Angela asked looking saddened.

"Yeah; it was an accident." Harvey said remembering going to the morgue and seeing the rope marks on his neck. "And I should have been there for him." Harvey said pulling out of the car park and driving as the drive to his office was filled with the loud silence.

* * *

"Angela. I have a present for you." Harvey said from the kitchen making her freeze.

"Really?" Angela asked trying to remember if Uncle Harvey left the match to get something but remembering him sitting next to Coach Dunne. She then saw a bunch of balloons on the side of her chair as he made her Cuban Sandwiches, chocolate milkshake with a large chocolate cake.

"You like it?" Harvey asked smiling as she tucked Angela into the table.

Angela stared at it as she began to devour the Cuban sandwiches alone with taking a large chunk of her cake eating the both at the same time. She then the sound of a camera going off as Angela saw him holding her Polaroid camera.

"Uncle Harvey!" Angela said mumbling through her food.

"Sorry, couldn't resist taking a picture of you eating like a caveman." Harvey said flapping the picture around and watching it form.

"It's cavewoman!" Angela said slurping her chocolate milkshake.

"Actually it's cavegirl since you're too young to be a woman." Harvey said as Angela smiled. "I've also got us something special."

"What can be more precious than food?" Angela asked innocently.

Harvey moved his hands into his pockets and took out two tickets as he gave her one. Confused, she picked up the ticket and began to gasp. "GUARDIANS ON THE GALAXY ON BROADWAY? OMG! THIS IS THE SECOND GREATEST DAY EVER!"

"What was the first?" Harvey asked curiously.

"When I saw Guardians Of The Galaxy in cinemas...three times!" Angela said as she ran towards Harvey who already had his arms open and hugged her as he was now getting used to her hugs around his waist.

* * *

As Harvey began to wear his textbook three piece suit, Angela watched sitting on her bed as she had an idea.

 **"I be on my suit and tie, shit tie, shit tie.  
I be on my suit and tie, shit tie, shit tie.  
Can I show you a few things?  
A few things, a few things, little baby cause...I bet on my suit and tie, shit tie, shit tie.  
I be on my suit and tie, shit tie, shit tie." **Angela began singing as Harvey crossed his eyebrows looking at her.

"Are you singing Justin Timerlake's Suit and Tie?" Harvey said.

"I don't know why it's not your theme song like how wrestlers have one." Angela said shrugging.

"You're not a bad singer for an 8 and a half year old." Harvey said putting buttoning his shirt.

"What happened to calling me 8?" Angela asked curiously.

"Sick of you adding three syllables so I decided to conserve my voice box output and oxygen input." Harvey said.

"Uncle Harvey…English please." Angela said folding her arms.

"That was English." Harvey said looking down at her.

"But what was smart English. I want baby English." Angela said tilting her head and looking up at him.

"Fine. I wanted to save energy but a baby won't understand what energy is so you can't say baby English." Harvey said.

 **"I can't wait till I get you on the floor good looking.  
Going out so hot just like an oven.  
And I'll burn myself but just had to touch it.  
It's so fly and it's all mine.  
Hey baby, we don't mind all the touching.  
Cause if they study close real close they might learn something.  
She ain't nothing but a little doozy when she does it. She so flyyyy, tonight."**

"And as long as I got my suit and tie." Harvey said beginning to sing as they both shared a smile as they both began to sing the chorus.

 **"And as long as I got my suit and tie.  
I'ma leave it all on the floor tonight.  
And you got fixed up to the nines.  
Let me show you a few things.  
All pressed up in black and white.  
And you dressed in that dress I like.  
Love is swinging in the air tonight.  
Let me show you a few things.  
Let me show you a few things.  
Show you a few things about love.  
Now we're in the swing of love.  
Let me show you a few things.  
Show you a few things about love.  
Hey"**

* * *

" _I noticed that when you came back you go out a lot." Donna said leaning against the door of the bathroom and watching Harvey wash his hands._

" _I know…timing's a bitch I guess." Harvey said closing the tap and drying his hands with a towel._

" _Why don't you stay home? We can watch something and relax…didn't you want to watch the old Bond movies they were showing on TV?" Donna asked smiling._

" _I did but I'm getting late." Harvey said putting his hands up innocently and looking at her._

" _Can I come then?" Donna asked tilting her head._

" _What about Patrick?" Harvey asked pointing to their room._

" _I can get Mike and Rachel to babysit." Donna said running a hand through her hair._

" _But you'd hate it. It's just gonna be me and a bunch of high school friends and we wanted to make it a guy's night out. I ain't seen some of them guys for years, all we wanted to do was go back to our old high school and get drunk in the library or something." Harvey said walking towards her and kissing her on the lips for a second. "Okay, bye."_

" _Harvey. I've been thinking." Donna said as Harvey sighed and looked back at her._

" _Yeah?" Harvey asked._

" _I think it's time Harvey. I'm sure of it." Donna said confidently._

 _Harvey rolled his eyes and sighed and he looked away from her for a second in disbelief and then back at her. "This is the worst time Donna."_

" _It'll be a new start for us. You know, after all the arguments we've had. Since Casey passed away." Donna said trying to convince him._

" _You really wanna be one of them couples who has a baby to save their marriage." Harvey said walking away from their bedroom as Donna followed._

" _Save?" Donna asked questioning him._

" _Repackage, restart, whatever the fuck you wanna call it." Harvey said putting his hand on the door._

" _You really gonna walk out of here and not talk about us?" Donna asked getting angrier. "You fucking coward."_

" _I'm not prepared to talk about this." Harvey said opening the door as Donna quickly slammed it and stood in front of it. "Get away from the door."_

" _No." Donna said stubbornly as Harvey pushed her away but not realising that he pushed her so hard that her shoulder collided with the edge of the couch as she fell harshly on the hard floorboard._

" _Fuck I'm so sorry." Harvey said rushing towards her as Donna felt the tears escaping from her eyes from the pain and fear at how much he wanted to her her._

" _Get away from me." Donna said moving backwards slowly and terrified of him._

" _Donna I-"_

" _If you're going to stay, stay forever but if you're going to go forever then go today."_

" _Donna I….fuck!" Harvey muttered to himself as he walked out of the door._

 _As he shut the door she got up slowly clutching her shoulder. Once she made it into her room she slowly laid down on the bed and began to sobbed onto the pillow._

 _She'd made her decision._

 _She was going to leave him._

 _Forever._


	12. Goodbye My Love

When he got his niece home he managed to open the door with one hand as he was carrying her in her arms because she fell asleep in the car. Harvey sat her stuff down by her door and then laid her on the bed while he got her pyjamas.

As he laid the comforter over Angela he realised how much he missed doing these fatherly responsibilities with Patrick. He missed tucking Patrick into bed; he missed turning around to see Donna lean against the wall and smile as he'd walk towards her and kissed her cheek and comment about how good of a father he was.

"Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked opening her eye slowly and mumbling.

"Shhh. Don't wake up and stop dreaming." Harvey said whispering and patting her back to speak.

"I have to tell you something." Angela asked turning to her side and grabbing on her teddy.

"Tell me quickly." Harvey whispered leaning his head towards her.

"I love you Uncle Harvey." Angela said smiling as she fell back to sleep.

"I love you too, Angie….like I do with Patrick. Even if he's not even here right now." Harvey whispered and kissing the top of her head. He got up and slowly walked towards her door and looked back at her one more time and tried to close the door without waking her up.

* * *

"Why is it that you never get tall jockeys?" Angela asked whilst they were eating breakfast.

"When you mean jockeys you mean the guys that jump with the horses?" Harvey asked taking a sip of his blood orange juice.

"What other jockeys are there?" Angela asked curiously.

"I'm just asking because they also use the word to describe someone struggling to achieve something." Harvey said shrugging.

"No. I'm talking about people who ride in horse races; I'm just saying that I've never seen a tall jockey. They're sorta like midgets." Angela said finishing her cereal.

"It's because of the weight." Harvey said finishing his eggs.

"I know it's because of the weight but what if you're tall and you want to be a jockey? It's not fair on them. I mean my mom used to tell me that that everybody can grow up to become anything they wanted to be as long as they chased their dreams. Now in the case of tall people wanting to be jockeys that's blatantly untrue." Angela said thinking about it.

"Blame it in the genes." Harvey said shrugging.

"You still need to tell me what that words means besides it meaning the English word for pants." Angela said pointing her spoon at him.

"I'm still not telling you because your mind would be blown and it'll open to more questions to which I can't answer too."

"At least give me a clue." Angela said pouting.

"You need to work on your pouts because they're never going to work…ever." Harvey said getting up and taking his dishes to the kitchen.

"Fine then. I'll just Google it...that's what the internet is for." Angela said taking her phone out and googling it before Harvey took the phone away from her hands making her gasp as he turned it off.

"What was that for?" Angela asked raising her hands.

"Okay I'll try to explain it as best as possible." Harvey said giving her phone back.

 ** _21 minutes later_**

"So that's why babies have the same eye colour as their mom or dad." Angela said with her eyes wide open as she nodded slowly. "But how does it start? Like does a man and woman sleep with other and she gets pregnant?"

"Something like that. You'll learn more in your science class which is why you should take an interest in science." Harvey said in his Mark Wahlberg impression.

"You sounded like someone trying to do a bad version of a Boston accent." Angela commented.

"No way, my Mark Wahlberg impression is always spot on." Harvey replied back shaking his head.

"That's just no true Uncle Harvey. You're delusional! Plus isn't he Jewish?" Angela asked curiously.

"Why does he have to be Jewish? Can't he be an atheist?" Harvey replied raising his eyebrow.

"But his surename has berg at the end. I mean Jesse Eisenberg, Adam Sandberg, Goldberg the wrestler…"

"What about Whoopi Goldberg? She's not Jewish. Plus Marky Mark's a good old Catholic Christian. I don't want a discussion about religion." Harvey said shaking his head.

"Is it because you don't' believe in God?" Angela asked.

"I guess I believe we're living in a dream within a dream." Harvey said shrugging.

"How was the world created?" Angela asked.

"Big bang theory." Harvey replied quickly.

"You believe in something that happened by coincidence? I thought you didn't believe in-"

"But I do believe in destiny. Just like it's your destiny for me to play you one of the worst movies I've ever seen." Harvey said walking up to his Blu Ray collection and quickly picking up a Blu Ray as if he'd memorised it's position.

"What's it called?" Angela asked.

"It's a movie starring Nicolas Cage and it's called Vampire's Kiss." Harvey said putting the movie in his Blu Ray player.

 ** _One hour and forty three minutes later_**

"Uncle Harvey." Angela said turning her head to face him.

"Yeah?" Harvey asked with a smirk.

She quickly launched herself onto Harvey as he felt himself fall onto the couch with Angela tickling her.

"I'M A VAMPIRE! I'M A VAMPIRE!" Angela said tickling his neck as the both of them tried to contain their laugh.

"You really want me to unleash the tickle master inside me?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"Don't make empty threats Uncle Harvey. Especially if it's me on top of you with my small hands tickling your body." Angela asked tilting her head.

"But I am stronger than you." Harvey said smiling as Angela paused for a moment.

"You know you're…..I'M OUT OF HERE!" Angela shouted as she got up from Harvey and ran towards her room.

"What was your first date like?" Angela asked as the both of them began to make dinner.

Harvey heated the oil in the largest saucepan and began adding onion, apples, celery and a pinch of salt as he began cooking for 10 minutes.

"My first date?" Harvey asked adding butternut squash, curry powder, cinnamon with Angela added the nigella seeds and a grind of black pepper as they let it cook for 10 minutes.

"I shouldn't have asked you. Sorry about that." Angela said thinking that he'd be sad thinking about it.

"Depends, you wanna know about the first time we had dinner together or our first proper date as a couple? Because we had so many dates together before we both agreed we were madly in love even though I knew I was in love with her." Harvey asked adding tomatoes and stock and he covered the lead and left it to simmer.

"Number one ever! Like the first time the both of you sat down to have dinner after you met." Angela said sitting on the stool.

"Before I tell you my story I have to ask you something because it's important you understand this when you're younger. Do you believe in magic?" Harvey asked.

"No." Angela quickly replied as Harvey smiled.

"You will when you first see him because they say when you meet the love of your life, time will stop and it's true. But what they don't tell you is that when it starts again it moves extra fast to catch up."

* * *

 _At 6:00 on the dot, Harvey knocked on her door._

 _"Hi," Donna said when she finally opened the door._

 _Harvey's eyes widened slightly and stared at her legs, up to her skirt and then back up to her. "Hey."_

 _She was glad she'd gone with the skirt when she saw him in khakis and a blue button down and tie, holding his leather jacket draped over his arm. "You look nice," Harvey said after a moment._

 _"Thanks; you too. Shall we?" Donna asked feeling awkward inside. For some reason Harvey was starting to grow onto her and she never understood why; it never happened with the other boyds._

 _They ended up at an Italian restaurant that Donna looked up earlier in the day._

 _"Thank you," Donna said as the waiter pulled out her chair._

 _"You're welcome. My name is Marlon and I'll be serving you tonight. Would you like to something to drink? Our wine list is on the front of the menu."_

 _"Parli italiano?" Donna asked in her Italian accent. Harvey looked at her surprised at not only at her ability to speak Italian but in a perfect accent that wasn't too stereotypical._

 _"E'così bello sentire la mia lingua a casa da una bella donna come te." Marlon said excited as he twirled his moustache a little wanting to hug her._

 _"Avrò un bicchiere di Tenuta di Trinoro ' Palazzi ' Toscana IGT, Toscana e lo stesso con lui Se obietta poi ignorarlo." Donna ordered._

 _"I'll have the same but I want a Dom Perignon '51" Harvey said nodding his head._

 _"There's no such thing as a Dom Perignon '51. The grapes never grew that year so the wine doesn't exist." Donna said._

 _"Been recently re-watching the James Bond movies?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow and smiling._

 _"On Her Majesty's Service is actually one of my favourites despite the fact that George Lazenby has nothing on Sean Connery." Donna said shrugging._

 _"You got a point there. Too bad he's still the best Bond ever." Harvey said shaking his head._

 _"Craig is better." Donna said smirking as Harvey had a face of shock all over him._

 _"BLASPHEMY!" Harvey said gasping._

 _"I like the Piers Brosnan even more." Marlon commented as the both of them looked back at him._

 _"I'll have a Dom Perignon '53 then Marlon. And everyone loves Brosnan, he's better than Dalton at least." Harvey nodded as Marlon smiled and noted it done._

 _"Ok, so what do you like?" Donna asked as Marlon left to give them their wine._

 _"I'm not too fussy." He said confused as she pressed her lips together._

 _"Do you feel like having chicken, veal, sea food," Donna asked he watched her wrinkle her nose at the choice, "or something grilled?"_

 _"Parmigiana sounds nice. I'm feeling hungry for chicken today I guess." Harvey said looking at her._

 _"I'll have that then," Donna nodded._

 _Marlon came back with the wine glass and popped it open using a cork screw as he began pouring it for the both of them. Once they told him that they'll order some parmigiana, he nodded and rushed off to the kitchen._

 _"You have enough money to tip him?" Donna asked curiously._

 _"I don't believe in tipping." Harvey said shrugging taking a sip of his wine._

 _"You say that like you're denying that God exists. Of course you gotta believe in tipping." Donna said taking a sip of her wine._

 _"I don't understand why we should tip, that's all. Would you tip someone who works in McDonalds?" Harvey asked._

 _"Of course I would." Donna said as if she was stating the obvious._

 _"But they get paid minimum wage. They don't bring you yours food and they don't refill your drink yet you'd tip them?" Harvey asked questioning her logic._

 _"But serving staff gets paid less than minimum wage." Donna said._

 _"But not at McDonalds."_

 _"But we're not in McDonalds." Donna said looking around the restaurant._

 _"Not my fault they get paid less than minimum wage, it's a problem with society. If society says we should tip them then is it obligatory to tip them? No because everyone's trying to be a hipster every now and then." Harvey said taking a sip of his wine._

 _"Are you seriously having a debate about tipping?" Donna asked._

 _"You started it and I'm waiting for you to finish it." Harvey said smiling._

 _"Fine. I'll end it here." Donna said sighing._

 _"So how much people in your family?" Harvey asked changing the subject._

 _She saw Marlon arrive with their food as he placed the parmigiana in front of them. They began to place it onto their plates and began eating._

 _"Me, mom, dad and one brother." Donna said cutting her asparagus and looked at her plate, unable to meet his eyes._

 _"What's your brother do?" Harvey asked curiously._

 _"Jared? He's an English teacher at a high school." She answer nodding, as she took a bite of the vegetable._

 _"How is everything?" Marlon asked, appearing at Donna's elbow._

 _"Great." Harvey answered._

 _"Really good." Donna answered._

 _When Donna pushed her plate away and sat back, pressing a hand to her stomach, Harvey raised an eyebrow. "I'm full." she declared._

 _"You're not going to finish that?" he pointed to rest of the food on her plate. Unlike her, Harvey had finished his meal._

 _"Donna Paulsen, I know it's premature to say this but I love you and one day I will marry you." Harvey said with a smirk and Donna's eyebrows crossed in confusion._

 _"You don't even know me." Donna replied leaning closer in curiosity._

 _Harvey looked down at the table smiling to himself as he slowly lifted his face to look deep into her brown eyes as if he wanted the following words to remain in her subconsciousness. "I have the rest of my life to find out."_

* * *

"You know how I said I love you last night?" Angela asked.

"Yes?" Harvey asked raising her eyebrow and shaking his head.

"That was boring as hell except for the part about the tipping. Makes you sound cheap." Angela asked giggling a little.

"What do you know about romance? You're eight." Harvey asked questioning her.

" _And a half."_ Angela emphasized over her shoulder as she turned to face him. "When did she start to _love_ you? When did the both of you start to get exciting and not boring talking about how you don't really love each other but a blind person could see it from a mile away?"

"Before Karaoke night."

* * *

 ** _Soundtrack: Chromatics – Yes_**

 _"So you decided what song you're going to sing?" Donna asked looking up at Harvey who was rubbing his heads through his gloves._

 _"If I tell you then it defeats the purpose of a surprise." Harvey said looking down confused._

 _"Your surprises suck though. Like you ended up doing that horrible Eminem song where he starts rapping like a drunk Irishman trying to sing the English national anthem after having 20 pints of Guinness." Donna said putting her hands in her pockets leaning onto Harvey's car and looking at him._

 _"That's something I can't imagine. I mean aren't the Irish independent from England so why the fuck would an Irishman sing the English national anthem?" Harvey said laughing a little._

 _"I'm saying it for the sake of a metaphor." Donna said rolling her eyes._

 _"Your metaphors are pretty extreme if you ask me." Harvey commented._

 _"But I'm not asking you and now that I know what you think of my metaphor's they're only going to get worse and I'll include Jake Gyllenhaal somehow or that guy that tried selling you that baby oil in the gym." Donna said smirking._

 _"Oh you mean Zack?" Harvey asked with a smile on his face._

 _"You even know his name you sick-"_

 _"No homophobic slurs. This is America." Harvey said patriotically._

 _"A country that was built on Europeans kicking out the true Americans." Donna said as they walked along the sidewalk._

 _"And look what happened at the end? America is the greatest country on the earth." Harvey said as Donna shook her head viciously._

 _"China has freedom, England has freedom, Canada, Australia, all have freedom and free will. Plus it doesn't help that we're the most arrogant and most hated country in the world." Donna said casually._

 _"That's because they're jealous of us...like you are of me and Zack." Harvey said laughing to himself before earning a smack on the arm from Donna._ _"Jealous red?"_

 _"But seriously what song you singing?" Donna asked._

 _"Like A Virgin." Harvey said as Donna shook her head._

 _"Do you really want me to quote Reservoir Dogs now?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow and challenging him._

 _"I wanna hear your best Tarantino impression. So challenge accepted." Harvey said with a smirk._

 _"The Madonna classic 'Like a Virgin' is all about a girl who digs a guy with a big dick. The whole song is a metaphor for big dicks." Donna said as Harvey tried to contain his laugh._ _"It's about some cooze who's a regular fuck machine. I mean all the time, morning, day, night, afternoon, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick."_

 _"How many dicks was that?" Harvey asked._

 _"Harvey?"_

 _"What is it?" Harvey asked putting his hands inside his pocket._

 _"Where are we going?" Donna asked turning her head to the side._

 _"Wanted to show you something." Harvey said smirking as they shared a pause for a moment._

 _"You're taking me to an alleyway?" Donna asked looking at the alleyway as they began huddling together._

 _"So?" Harvey asked shrugging._

 _"You don't see anything wrong with taking me into a dark alley in this time of day?" Donna said shaking her head in disbelief._

 _"You'll just have to wait and see." Harvey said rolling his eyes._

 _"You're not going to rape me are you?" Donna asked looking up at him raising her eyebrow._

 _"What? Why would I do that?" Harvey asked letting go of her and looking down with his crazy eyes._

 _"Because you haven't gotten into my pants yet." Donna said with a cheeky tilting her head to the side showing him her neck making him bite his lip. At this rate the both of them knew each other's weaknesses and teased each other here and there._

 _"I could get into Scarlet Johansson's pants if I wanted too." Harvey said as they walked into the alleyway._

 _"Maybe by using extreme brute force and rape and some creative blackmail. That's a must." Donna said shaking her head in agreement._

 _"I'm not a rapist." Harvey said defending himself and smiling._

 _"That's what all rapists say." Donna said stating her point._

 _"So everyone who lies is a rapist?" Harvey asked questioning her logic._

 _"Anyone who lies and takes a woman to an alleyway might be one." Donna said as the both of them stopped walking to face each other._

 _They turned the corner and stepped into a sugar snowstorm funnelling from the bakery. Donna opened her mouth and grinned as she watched the sugar snowstorm surround the both of them as she twirled her body around it._

 _"Harvey this is-"_

 _Harvey began to grin as he pressed slightly against the wall._

 _"You know I have to kiss you now." Harvey said grinning._

 _"Is that right?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow and grinning back._

 _"It'd be a mistake to let your walk through a sugar storm without a kiss." Harvey whispered as the both of them saw the sugar floating around them like something out of a fairy tale._

 _The both of them began to lean in. "Hold on."_

 _Harvey took his finger and began to brush the sugar off Donna's lip as she looked at him and smiled. He then leaned into and-_

* * *

"And she fell in love with you." Angela asked cutting him off.

"Maybe." Harvey said as he began to serve them the food on their place.

"Did you kiss? On the _lips?_ Like they do in the movies?" Angela asked curiously smiling.

"Yes." Harvey replied quickly.

"Oooooooooooooh," she squealed and skipped to the table. "She _loved_ you! How did you feel, nervous?"

"The woman you love shouldn't make you feel nervous. I knew she was the one when I saw her and I felt like we knew each other's weaknesses, like it was the most natural thing in the world."

* * *

 _"Harvey." Donna asked as she broke her kiss with Harvey. Harvey looked at her and rested his forehead against hers._

 _"Yeah?" Harvey asked._

 _"Do you love me?" Donna asked whispered and looking into his eyes._

 _Harvey stood still and nodded looking back at her putting his hands around her back as if she belonged to him._

 _"Since when?"_

 _"Always." Harvey whispered back._

 _"I don't want us to be like them couples who don't stay long." Donna whispered taking his hands from her back and locking her fingers with his._

 _"Me neither."_

 _"I want us to be together forever because the first thing I wanna do when I wake up is see your face." Donna said now putting her hands on his cheeks._

 _"Donna. If we're going to do this then I can't promise you that everything will be sunshine and rainbows. But I can promise you that I'll love you for a lifetime. I want to dream with you and build a life around us. I want to be your future." Harvey said putting his hands on her face using his thumb to remove the tears that were dropping down her face. "I want to remember us, just as we are now." He whispered before sharing another kiss._

* * *

"You're using too much liquid Angela." Harvey said scolding him as he dried the dishes whilst she washed them.

"Are you defying my authority?" Anegla asked as she shut the tap off doing an impression of a war general.

"No." Harvey said smiling.

"That's _'no mam'_ for you. How dare you refuse to address me with proper authority." Angela said getting off the stool and standing in front of her.

"Sorry mam!" Harvey said putting his feet together, straightening his back and giving her a salute.

"Drop down and give me 20 sergeant." Angela commanded.

"20 what mam? 20 eggs? 20 press ups? 20 dollars? I've only got 10 in my pocket." Harvey said trying not to laugh as he placed his hands in his pockets to take out his wallet.

"Sarcasm is not welcomed in camp! Drop down and give me 200!" Angela commanded again.

"How about...I just give you…" Angela screamed quite as he picked her up placing her on the table and began tickling her.

"I don't want 200 tickles! We're in the middle of a war and you're...stop Uncle Harvey!" Angela gasped between giggles and squirmed.

She managed to escape his grasp as she crawled under the table. Harvey didn't know where she went as she walked towards the sink but before he could turn around she began to tickle him from behind whilst hanging from his back. He managed to grab around her back so that he was giving her a piggyback.

"No fair Uncle Harvey!" She said as she tried to wiggle herself off Harvey's back as he quickly ran into the living room where he brought her onto the couch and began to bombard her stomach with tickles.

"Who's the boss now?" Harvey asked.

"Barack Obama." Angela said giving her a witty answer before he began to tickle her in every ticklish body part possible.

"Who's the boss Angie?"

"Jesus Christ!" Angela replied earning her more tickles.

"Who's the boss Angela?!"

"You are Uncle Harvey! Now stop!" Angela said before he stopped tickling her as he sat on the couch next to her smiling at her breathless but not as much as she was as she began to wipe her tears of joy away.

"You know I'm sure you gave up first because you're getting old." Angela said looking at him as he sent her a smirk.

"You sure about that?" Harvey asked leaning towards her.

"No! You won fair and square!" Angela said running towards her room to stop getting tickled again.

* * *

Harvey walked towards his room and started to lie down on his bed. He looked to his left and saw the note still under the pillow as he took it out. He read her words again in his head and shook his head.

"I've gotta do something about this." He muttered to himself.

He took out his phone and looked through his contacts and stared at the name hovering from his phone and began to call the number. He placed the reviever against his ear hoping to hear an answer from across the line.

"Hello?"

Harvey turned his body to look through the window. "Cameron. Hey, it's Harvey."

"Harvey?" Cameron asked surprised. "It's been a long time."

"Yeah...it won't take long." Harvey said simply.

"I was just thinking about you the other day when I walked passed Pearson Specter on my way to the bakery. You know the same one I told you sell them sugar coated doughnuts? I could have sworn I saw you through your office but my eyesight's gotten pretty bad these days and-" Cameron said coughing across the phone which sounded like a bad cough.

"You okay?" Harvey asked.

"You wanna know the truth? I don't think it'll change much of what you think of me anyway." Cameron said adjusting his voice but coughing.

"Cameron we haven't spoken in almost 10 years. I'm ready to let that all go away right now." Harvey said opening the window and letting the wind hit his face. Harvey knew Cameron as good as Cameron knew him and he knew that he sounded like a changed man by the way he was talking.

"Cameron, what happened?" Harvey asked.

He heard Cameron sigh as his voice croaked but stopped as he thought about how to put his next work in a way that wouldn't sound too emotional for him. "Lung cancer."

"What?" Harvey asked shocked as he felt his hands go slightly weak.

"Stage three. Best-case scenario, with chemo, I'll live another two years."

"I didn't know." Harvey said sitting down on the bed.

"I didn't want to tell you because I thought that you'd rather see me dead then in front of your face but here we are. Two strangers who once knew each other talking on the phone as changed men. That's why experience is vital in any situation, it separates a kite dancing in a hurricane from a plane flying through the clouds. " Cameron said dishearteningly.

"You still living in the same place. I can come visit and-"

"I don't want your sympathy. You see when I heard the news two months ago I was afraid I'd never be able to experience life ever again but I have nothing to fear anyone and I feel...alive. That's because every life comes with a death sentence why should I be scared when I'm just going to die early? I have spent my whole life frightened, not knowing that would happen for 71 years. But ever since my diagnosis I sleep perfectly fine. I sleep finer than I did when during my days. The problem isn't the cancer but it's the fear and what I've told myself I have to do is look at fear head to head and kick that bastard back into its mother's filth." Cameron said as both men shared a laugh. "What is it that you wanted Harvey?"

"I know you know people that work in the government." Harvey said.

"Keeping a track on me, have you?" Cameron asked laughing a little as he coughed a little.

"Cameron, I _need_ to find them."

"You know I can't do that. Remember the last time you asked me? How long as it been?" Cameron asked.

"I know how long it's been but please. I need something. Even something small. I still remember when she left me...every detail. When my teardrops turned into waterfalls to when my heart and pulse started to beat like my heart was a cathedral."

"Harvey let me give you some advice." Cameron said coughing into the receiver. "You can't replace anyone. What is lost is lost but doesn't mean I can't make a few calls and try to help you."

* * *

 ** _Soundtrack: Hans Zimmer - TIme_**

 _The sunrise that scorched through the blinds of the window forced Donna's eye to open. She could feel them trying to remain open through the dry tears that wet her eyes that night. She turned to her right side but saw that it was empty...like it always was. She leaned up onto the bed looking up at the ceiling and started to cry a little...this was the day he was going to leave Harvey. She then looked down towards her feet trying to gather the strength to get up but the flashes of her life with Harvey as husband and wife were playing through her head like a projection. She smiled a little but when she closed her eyes she saw Casey's grave along with the lonely night with herself and Patrick looking at the door waiting for Harvey to come back. She opened her eyes back and she knew what she had to do know, as if an idea had just implanted inside her subconscious._

 _Slowly she got up and walked towards the door of her and locked it. She turned back and her head was zooming forwards and backwards into the room as she saw visions of Harvey, herself and Patrick playing in the room. She remember when they first painted the room when they moved in, how they thought it'd be fun to paint on each other and the kiss they had afterwards...it was almost like the kiss of death now that she thought of it. Every kiss was as poisonous as the last, it was made to inflict pain and suffering whilst keeping the mind hopeful. There was no point of delaying the inevitable._

 _Suddenly she head the rain fall from outside as the sun had disappeared as if God was weeping about what was going to happen. She wanted to be outside for some reason and look up opening her arms to let the cold rain fall onto her face to try and cool her boiling anger that was going to explode but she always knew how to keep it in...especially since getting angry at Harvey never worked anymore. He just ignored her, called her arrogant, selfish...but he didn't know what she was feeling. He was the selfish one, not her._

 _Now she wanted to climb out the window and fall down, letting gravity take the better of her like Dumbledore when he accepted his fate or like King Kong when the world decided that they didn't need someone out of the ordinary taking their attention away but who would take care of Patrick? Harvey would just raise him to be the worst child she could imagine...no she couldn't kill herself. She had a reason to live._

 _She walked towards her bed and took out suitcases. She quickly unzipped them and walked towards her wardrobe where she began to throw her clothes inside the suitcases. Dresses, shoes, makeup, pictures. Once the first suitcase was full she quickly took out a second briefcase and filled it with even more clothes as she started to choke up a little. She didn't want to do this but did she have a choice? No one can have a choice but leave when the person you love doesn't love you anymore. When they would rather throw you onto the floor and walk away than to see whether your shoulder is still hurt and if they could save their crumbling marriage._

 _For some reason she thought that if she were to die today then Harvey wouldn't cry as much as he would have when they were still in love. If he saw them carrying her casket towards her pit would he really try and grab onto the casket and apologise? These were questions that were running into her head and she couldn't help but shake the thought away literally. She finished unpacking the second suitcase and walked towards the door unlocking it. She took both suitcases towards Patrick's nursery where he saw her sleeping._

 _She quickly got Patrick into her arms whilst struggling to carry the suitcases in her hands until she heard the door open. Harvey walked inside and saw Donna holding Patrick._

 _"Donna?" Harvey asked quickly locking the door._

 _"I'm leaving you Harvey. For good now." Donna said looking him in the eye with anger with a hint of sadness in her voice._

 _"Donna you don't have to do this. Let's talk-"_

 _"I'm sick of it Harvey. I don't' want to talk about it." Donna said sitting on her bed and shaking her head as her tears fell down onto the floor._

 _"I'm sorry Donna. I didn't mean-"_

 _"You didn't mean to hurt me so bad that your own son doesn't know who you are and you didn't care about the wife you've isolated for years?" Donna asked looking up at him angrily and then back onto the floor putting her hands on her face._

 _"Donna look at me." Harvey said making him face her._

 _He moved her suitcases from his foot which she packed after hearing about another job that Harvey was going to take on. She had enough of his lies and he wanted to leave him for good._

 _She looked at him as a tears ran down her eyes threatening to sob._

 _"I'm sick of it Harvey. I'm sick of you choosing your work over us. Patrick's still doesn't know you're his dad." Donna whispered._

 _"Donna you can't leave me here alone. Please stay. I don't want you to leave me, don't you understand?" Harvey whispered back as he placed an arm around her._

 _"Harvey-"_

 _"Donna, you're not listening to me."_

 _"Harvey. I've got no choice. I've got no other options; this is what you've done to me. I made you the center of my world and gave up everything around it. I went out of my way to satisfy you anyway possible. I wore nice clothes, make up, lipstick all to make sure you stayed in love with me but at the end I realised that it didn't matter if I were bold, or if I had brown hair because I guess we weren't meant to be with each other. The fairy tales we grow up with where prince charming would take you away...it's all a fucking lie Harvey!" Donna said as more tears streamed down her eyes._

 _"Please don't leave me." Harvey said as wrapped turned towards her back as she broke down in front of him leaning onto his lap. She wanted to hold him because he thought that it was going to be the last time he could touch her._

 _"Please tell me it's only for a while." Harvey said whispered into her ear._

 _"I don't want to stay. You've alienated us...and I can't love a man who does that to me. You broke my heart Harvey and you promised me you wouldn't." Donna said sobbing._

 _"I can't live without you. If I had a choice between loving you and breathing then my last breath would be telling you that I love you. Don't do this to me." Harvey said leaning onto her head and crying._

 _"Please don't make me leave like this Harvey." She said getting up slowly to face him._

 _He put his hand into his pocket and handed him a watch and closed her fist onto it. "When Patrick grows older give this to him. My dad gave it to me."_

 _"Don't do this to me." Donna said croaking._

 _"I don't want Patrick to feel alone when you leave. He needs to know that no matter what his dad loves him. He needs to know that. And no matter where you go I promise I will find you because I'm your husband. But you don't have to make me promise anything because I'll do everything you want me too." Harvey whispered back._

 _"Stop it Harvey." Donna said._

 _"I'll stop if you don't leave." Harvey replied as he lied down onto the bed and cried onto the comforter. Donna leaned over to Harvey as her tears began to roll down her face again._

 _"I love you Harvey. Forever. You hear me? I'll always love you but I'm not coming back. Maybe we'll meet someday in another time or in another existence when our minds are less chaotic. Maybe we'll be right for each other by that time but right now we're both confused on what route to follow. We're both inflicted by each other's poisons so powerful that the love we once had can't heal it. You know they say that either we're alone in the universe or the universe is alone in you...either way it's scary to think about how I had the whole universe in you and you made me feel more than lonely. You killed me Harvey Specter and now you know what it's like to have something before it's...gone. You rode like lightening in our relationship...and you crashed like thunder. Goodbye my love." Donna said leaning back to pick up her suitcase and Patrick who was sound asleep._

 _She got into her car and set Patrick onto the front seat putting the seat belt on. She sat on the driver's seat and looked back at the house and began to drive off._

 _Harvey ran outside of the door and began to chase after the car as Donna watched the distance between them grow apart; the perfect metaphor for their relationship as another tear fell down her eyes._

 _"I will find you!" Harvey screamed falling onto his knees. He watched on her mirrors as she turned left._

 _Harvey stayed there and watched the car drive into the rain towards where the sunset would have been...and time stopped for a moment as the rain stopped._


	13. Like An Angel

The sound of the phone had woken Harvey from his nightmare as he quickly got up from his bed. His wiped his forehead for sweat and realised that this was the most he sweated. It was like his subconscious wanted him to experience the moment because he was so sucked into it and he couldn't escape it…like he was trapped in that moment and it played in loop over and over making the nightmare never ending.

He turned his head and grabbed his phone to Cameron was calling him.

"Hello?" Harvey answered.

"Did you get my message?" Cameron asked as Harvey took the phone away from his ear seeing the notification on his phone.

"Yeah. Just got it." Harvey said nodding.

"Good. Harvey, no matter what happens now I want you to behave maturely. If you're going to let your emotions get the better of you then you might as well give up because emotion will not get you through this, logic will. Goodbye Harvey. I hope we get to see each other one day before-"

"Cameron." Harvey said interrupting her.

"What is it?" Cameron asked.

"Thank you. I promise you that we'll meet and I'll show you my kids. They need to know who helped me when I was young and naive even if we never met eye to eye afterwards." Harvey said.

"I hope your get your kids back. It'd be a shame if you spend the rest of your life never to see their faces again. A father should never be reduced to that. Goodbye Harvey." Cameron said before cutting the call.

Harvey quickly clicked onto the text message and paused for a moment staring at the number before calling it. He ran several scenarios in his head on how to respond to them, what he'd say if something happened but he shook his head and dialed the number.

"Hello?" The man answered from the other end of the line.

"Is this James?" Harvey asked as the sound of Donna's father sounded different to what he last remembered.

 _ **CAST: Jared - Eddie Redmayne**_

"No it's Jared." The man said. Harvey was relieved for a moment because it was Donna's brother. They were on good terms generally but after everything that happened he was predictably disappointed because they got along so well. "Who's calling if you don't mind me asking?"

"Jared…it's me….it's Harvey." Harvey said wincing.

"What? How did you—"

"Got it from an old friend but that doesn't matter. It's been a long time since we last spoke." Harvey said trying to engage a conversation.

"I know. How've things been Harvey?" Jared asked running a hand through his hair.

"You shouldn't ask questions you know the answers too." Harvey said sitting down.

"Stop speaking like a lawyer and get to the point. I don't think you should have the confidence or arrogance to do that especially in front of me." Jared said shaking his head.

"I never called to argue Jared. You know we're better than that." Harvey said looking out through the window and seeing the New York traffic.

"Then why the fuck did you call me? You know better than me that I'm the last person you should be calling." Jared said as his voice grew in anger.

"I need to speak with Mary or James." Harvey said interrupting him.

"They're not here. I'm just taking care of the house while they're...erm away." Jared said as Harvey noticed the long silence between thinking of an excuse.

"Would you mind giving me their numbers? So I don't have to call the house number over and over?" Harvey asked knowing that he wouldn't give it easily but it was worth asking.

"What's this about Harvey?" Jared asked pinching his nose.

"Are they available?" Harvey asked quickly trying to stay on topic.

"No." Jared said quickly.

"Why not?" Harvey asked.

"Family emergency."

"What sort of family emergency?" Harvey asked curiously. "I mean I might not be family anymore but I'd still like to know."

"The type that only concerns family which you perfectly stated that you're not a part of anymore. The same one that caused, what's the word to put it, friction between yourself and us." Jared said bluntly.

"I know you're still pissed off but….look...I hope it wasn't anything serious like a heart attack." Harvey said with a touch of sarcasm.

"No. There was an accident." Jared said as a light bulb in Harvey's head lit. Then Jared gasped, "Fuck—"

 ** _Bingo._**

"I'm sorry to hear that. How are they? How's Donna coping with her parents' situation?" Harvey asked concerned for Donna's parents for a moment.

"Why did you call?" Jared asked changing the subject.

"I'm trying to find Donna again." Harvey said sighing and pinching his nose.

"Harvey even you know that's a lost cause but since you don't understand that. Usually if you don't get people back from day one after they disappear then we're talking about a 10% chance. She's been gone for years so your chances of finding her are one in a million." Jared said trying to make him understand.

"That's the thing Jared." Harvey said pouring himself a glass of water from the jug at his bedside. "There's still a chance no matter what the odds are."

"Just give up and let it all go." Jared said sighing and not believing what he was hearing. "It's much more easier on the heart and I'm saying this to you as your friend, not as Donna's brother."

"I'm not giving up. Never. So stop trying to make me feel like I can't and whatever you say isn't going to work. You don't give up on the people you love and-"

"Harvey you don't fucking understand. You don't deserve her after what you did to her! She doesn't need you to **fly over** and create your little Oscar bait drama for her and our family! She left you and you're acting like as if you'll just come back into her life as if nothing happened. You never understood her silence and cries so why should you deserve her words." Jared asked shouting at him.

 ** _"Fly over?" Maybe she's in Cortland_**

"Thanks for your time. I've got everything I need." Harvey said.

"But we're not-"

Harvey cut the phone off before Jared could finish her sentence. He took a piece of paper and started to jot down his notes and began to create a mini case file trying to find everything link possible.

* * *

" _Donna, I'm home. I'm sorry I came late, there was traffic on the highway because some guy filmed himself naked. It'll probably go viral soon." Harvey said shutting the door behind but seeing that she wasn't there….instead his senses were bombarded with the sound of Patrick._

" _Donna, you want me to put Patrick in bed?" Harvey asked walking towards their room as he stood outside it._

 _Patrick's cries grew louder as Harvey put his ear onto the door but no sound of Donna whatsoever._

" _Donna." Harvey said knocking on the door. Still no response._

 _Harvey turned the door slowly and the first thing he saw among Patrick's shrieks was blood on the carpet. The more he opened the door the louder he could hear his heartbeat. Once he fully opened the door he fell on his knees weak._

 _Patrick was crying and covered in blood…Donna's blood._

" _Donna!" Harvey screamed as he ran towards her and saw the bedsheets covered in blood surrounded her lifeless body like a fountain._

 _He saw that she was bleeding from her neck with a knife in her hand that was covered fully in blood._

" _Oh my god! Donna! Wake…wake up." Harvey whispered as tears fell down his eyes. "Please tell me this is a prank. You got me now." Harvey said smiling but knowing it was useless._

" _Wake up! Please….no!"_

* * *

"Fuck!" Harvey said to himself as we woke up from a dream.

"Mommy!" Harvey heard the screeches from Angela's room.

"What the hell." Harvey muttered to himself as he ran out of the room.

"Mommy! Daddy! Where are you?!" Angela screeched louder. "Uncle Harvey!"

"I'm here." he pushed through her door. "Don't worry I'm here now. What happened Angie?" Harvey asked wiping her face away from the tears that flooded her face.

"Nightmare." Angela whispered as he noticed Donna's scarf next to her.

"What's gotten you so scared Angela?" Harvey asked rubbing her arm.

"I see mommy in bed at the hospital and the hospital and she doesn't wake up. I look around to see if Daddy's there but then I remember that he's never been there for me. And it's always the same. Mommy dies and never comes back." Angela whispered.

Harvey kissed her forehead and began to lie down next to her as she looked at him still trying to relax herself. "It'll be better. I promise."

"Do you have nightmares Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked throwing the comforter over her.

"I do and they're similar to yours. It's always about Donna dying and I can't do anything to stop it because I'm always too late. I used to think I could go a day without her smile or without hearing her voice. When she left I realised how hard it was and the next day came and it was even harder. And I knew with a sinking feeling that it got worse because I couldn't go to sleep without seeing her disappear like...I've seen things Angela with my eyes that you haven't. I've seen my father die, I've seen my mother becomes a distant stranger, I've been to my brother's funeral, I've seen the sun setting along the mountains, all those memories are starting to haunt me and they're all going to be lost like Donna has in my dreams...like tears...in the rain. And it happens over and over. I lose her when I sleep, when I hear her favourite song play on the radio or when I see a shirt she bought me. And it only gets worse when I think about kissing her lips, when I want to touch her and feel her touch or when I go to bed and wish I could hear her tell me that she loves me. And when I wake up and look at the empty space besides me it starts again. I lose her all over again." Harvey whispered as Angela wiped a tear from his face.

"I guess you could say we've been through a lot Uncle Harvey. But we've got so much left of our life and we have to smile." Angela said whispered and taking her thumb from Harvey's face and hugging him. "What where her hugs like?"

"It made me forget the world around me like a...like a"

"Like an angel." sighed the little girl as she looked down at Donna's scarf and twirled it around her fingers.

"Yeah like an angel. I'd do anything to hug her once last time so that all the broken pieces fit together. I'd hold her in my arms for a lifetime if I had a choice but I never trust a hug anymore. I used to hug her whenever I could but I realised it's just a way to hide your face. You know she would have loved you." Harvey said resting his chin on the top of her head.

"Really?" Angela asked moving her head to look at him.

"What would you think about being a sister to Patrick?" Harvey asked curiously.

"That'd be _fun._ That'd be the funnest thing _ever_!" Angela said excited.

"So if I adopted you…and we were together with your Aunty Donna and Patrick as a family…you would like that?" Harvey asked thinking about how to word what he was saying to her carefully.

"You'd be like my dad then." Angela said smiling.

"But you gotta remember that no one can replace your dad. If Marcus was alive then you would have loved him." Harvey said. "But you still have to go home after your match."

"What?" Angela said as he mind started to boggle with thoughts.

"I've got to find Donna and Patrick first. I've got to make things and—"

" _But Uncle Harvey—"_ she whined.

"You've gotta go back to school Angela which isn't here. I need you to understand because it's gonna take time to make up with them and-"

"I could help you! If you'd just—"

"Angie please listen to me. I don't know if things between us _can_ be fixed. I'll bring you back once everything's been cleared and happy again." Harvey said reassuring her. "I promise, Angie. I'm going to bring you back to live with me. Even if I can't get Donna and Patrick back I'll coming back. I promise."

* * *

" _One second." Mary said walking towards the door and looking through the keyhole. She felt her heart sink a little as she saw Donna standing on the doorway looking down at Patrick with suitcases in her hand._

 _Slowly she opened the door as Donna's attention turned to her mother who looked confused. Once the door was fully open she saw what a mess her daughter was as tears started to fall down her eyes._

" _Donna?" Mary asked looking at her. "What happened?"_

" _I left Harvey." Donna croaked as she walked forward to hug her mother._

" _Mary, what happened?" James asked walking towards the door and surprised to see Donna with her suitcases. "Donna, what happened?"_

" _I left Harvey." Donna said breaking the hug from her mother to look down at her father._

" _Why'd you leave Harvey, honey?" Mary asked concerned._

" _Did he hit you?" James asked as Donna quickly shook her head._

" _No, he….he never laid a finger on me." She whispered rubbing her shoulder. "He wasn't there for me and Casey and-"_

" _Let's not talk about this now. Come inside, Patrick must be feeling cold."_

* * *

"THIS IS WHERE WE FIGHT!" Coach Dunne said motivating her players.

Harvey wanted to laugh as she quoted 300 on the day of their match against Rose's fiercest rivals...New York City FC. She hated them with a passion and first witnessed it when Harvey trolled them by saying that New York City FC were a better team. He was at the receiving end at an hour rant as she talked about why they were _'money spending bitches'_ who were going to buy their way to the league.

"WE GO OUT THERE AND TEAR THEM LIMB BY LIMB FOR TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL!" Coach Dunne said as the whole team began to kick the floor creating an atmosphere that pumped up all the players.

"REMEMBER, GO FOR THE LEFT CENTRAL DEFENDER. SHE'S THE SIZE OF STUART LITTLE SO CRUSH HER! JUST DO IT! DONT LET YOUR DREAMS BE DREAMS! DO IT!" Coach Dunne shouted as the team screamed running their way outside the changing rooms and kicking out of the door.

"Nice speech you gave out there." Harvey said smiling.

"That's what happens when you watch 300 whilst eating nails and drinking petrol with Shia LaBeouf's motivational speech in the background." Rose said walking with Harvey.

"So how you been doing?" Harvey asked.

"I found someone actually." Rose said smiling.

"You did?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Yeah. Proper gentlemen. Didn't want to get into my pants." Rose said looking at him.

"We were both blind drunk and I haven't had sex for years." Harvey said.

"Not even a hooker?"

"Nope." Harvey said smiling.

"Damn I should have had sex with you and see how much you could-"

"Let's stop there. I can't get you horny in the middle of the match. I've seen what trolling you last night does to you."

* * *

 _12 minutes:_ Becky whips in a dangerous the ball from the edge of the box as Claudia jumps but fails to meet the header. The ball bounces awkwardly in front of the opposition defender as they've left Angela totally unmarked in the box, near the back post to side foots the ball into the net. **1-0!**

 _23 minutes:_ A ball in from the right from Angela, the opposition midfielder tries to intercept but steps over it. Sasha plays it into the box and Angela makes a lovely little layoff-dummy. It falls to Claudia, who hits his shot straight at the keeper. The ball rebounds off the goalkeeper and falls straight to Claudia who doesn't miss a second time. **2-0!**

 _25 minutes: _ Claudia feeds Miri, the ball comes across from the right. Angela has an airshot... that means it just flies to Alicia unmarked at the edge of the box and she hits a hard, crisp, low shot. **3-0!**

"Oh my god! That must means we've won now." Harvey said to Rose.

"That game isn't over until the fat lady sings." Rose said smirking back to Harvey.

"The fat lady?" Harvey asked.

"The whistle." Rose said rolling her eyes.

 _26 minutes: _ The same opposition midfielder has been caught in possession and New York City FC's defence have been opened up like a Kinder Egg as Claudia slots the ball home. The opposing fans start to leave the stadium as they can't handle the carnage but the home fans carry on singing their fans on. **4-0!**

"Holy shit!" Harvey said.

"I told you so." Rose said pointing to him.

 _53 minutes: _ Alicia's nearly at walking pace on the edge of the box, Beck and Claudia exchanging passes, with Angela being the catalyst for this destruction – she has a chance to get on the scoresheet again with a clean strike of her own. **5-0!**

 _69 minutes_ : Miri the creator, she plays it into Sasha, who has surged forward up the right. She has the composure to pick Angela who has time to place the shot past the keeper. She now has a hattrick! **6-0!**

 _90+3 minutes: _ Surging run down the left, Claudia plays a one-two to Angela as Claudia crosses the ball inside to Alicia who lashes it home with a magnificent finish. **7-0!**

The referee blew her whistle as Harvey along with Rose and their parents run towards their kids as the chants increase in power creating goosebumps at the back of anyone who'd listen to it.

"Angela!" Harvey shouted running towards her and picking her up and spinning around with her arms in the air.

"Uncle Harvey! You're embarrassing me in front of everyone!" Angela said giggling.

He put her down and kissed her cheek and hugged her hard as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I'm so proud of you Grootie. You're a true Specter."

"Why am I a true Specter now?" Angela asked as Harvey stopped spinning.

"Because you win like a Specter and you celebrate like one."

* * *

 _The voicemail came on for the eleventh time causing Harvey to lividly hang up and redial. Finally, a deep and angry rumble shouted through the receiver, "Harvey Specter, what part of 'dead to our family' do you not understand?!"_

" _Mr Paulsen...James. Have you spoken to Donna?"_

 _"You're lucky I picked up the phone." James said lividly._

 _"I know you used to work at the government but did she ask you to black her and Patrick out? I can't find any scraps of information on them. Nothing. Did she—"_

" _Yes. Her and Patrick have been added to our secure network. You will never find them using the Internet and you could hire any hacker you want but none of them will ever risk treason. Not even in a post-Snowden era." Donna's father replied coldly._

 _"How could do you do that to me?!"_

 _"How could_ you _do_ that _to your wife you sick son of a bitch? You alienated her, mutilated her and left he to die along with her heart. You son of a bitch, I gave you my blessing and you spat it back at me and gave me bullshit on top of more bullshit. Don't call us again and if you do that will be the end of it. But if you try to find her I will find you and you can guarantee I will kill you with my bare hands." James said bitterly as Harvey put his head down in shame and waited for James to cut the phone until another voice appeared from the phone._

" _Harvey?" Mary asked._

" _I'm so sorry Mary." Harvey said still looking down on the floor._

" _I just wanted to tell you that Donna's here with Patrick. She's doing fine and she told us everything. She told us how you would disappear the next day and how you left her thinking about you every morning when she woke up and every night before she'd go to sleep. She'd think about what you were doing and whether she should be worried about you. Then she told me how she stopped worrying about you and wondered whether you still cared about you. She'd glance at her phone all the time hoping that the glow will reflect your name on the screen even if she knew deep down that it wasn't you. You became her ghost Harvey. You screwed with her head like she wasn't worth anything and it's not fair because she's worth much more than that to you and now you know it. I guess you never know what you've got until it's gone. I'm sorry but this is the last time we'll probably ever speak. I always thought that when the time would come when I'm on my deathbed I don't have to be sad because I've got you and Donna looking over me along with my beautiful grand kids. This is goodbye Harvey. I can only wish you good luck from now on, you should never wish anyone bad luck is what I'd always say. Take care of yourself Harvey and maybe you'll find her and you'll be fine but we both know that it's never going to happen. It's a shame because I loved you as a son but you broke my heart too."_

* * *

Harvey attention was diverted away from Angela who was knocked out cold from sleeping on his lap in the taxi ride by the sound of a phone he didn't recognise.

"Is that your phone?" Harvey asked the taxi driver.

"Nope." The taxi driver said.

The noise grew louder as he looked at a phone glowing from inside her back. He opened the back quickly so that she couldn't wake up and took her phone out staring at the caller ID which just bared a number.

"Hello?" Harvey asked answering the phone.

"Who is this?" The man asked.

"Uhhhh-this is Angela's uncle. I just came to meet to visit her and she's asleep."

The phone call cut off and he put the phone inside her bag casually. "Must have been a wrong number." Harvey muttered to himself.


	14. Messages From Home

Harvey woke up the next morning and took out two aspirin's from the bedside drawer and swallowed them using his cup of water to try and help with the headache. He took Donna's note from under his pillow and read it. He looked at his clothes first and saw that he slept in his same clothes from last night but didn't care. He stared at the note again and tried to compose himself.

 ** _Don't stop dreaming of me…_**  
 ** _I'll still dream of what could have been…  
From your Bella_**  
 ** _-Donna_**

He took out his phone and dialled a number and heard it pick up.

"Jared," He said taking out a piece of paper and pen from the drawer next to his bed. "I just want to know which hospital Jon and Mary are in. I want to pay the medical bills."

"Donna's got that covered. They don't need any money." Jared said closing his eyes and preparing to possible argue with Harvey again.

"What money? Surely she doesn't get paid that much?" Harvey asked confused.

"You still underestimate her after all these years? She's my sister, she could be sitting on her ass all day having Kentucky Fried Chicken and drinking Coca Cola whilst the bank give her money for free. C'mon Harvey." Jared said as Harvey felt his smile from the end of the line.

"Then I want to send flowers." Harvey said thinking of an excuse.

"Thanks but we've got enough. Seriously, it looks like you've got into a market stand full of flowers."

"Let me send some to Donna at least. I've a stuffed monkey for Patrick and-"

"Harvey, you don't unders—UGH," Jared said sounding furious and frustrated to the point of ripping the hair from his scalp off. "You can't come running back to her life after all these years. It doesn't work like that and you know it."

"Jared you're the only person I've spoken to out of the family since she left me but it's not going to stop me from flying out to Cortland Sunday night. You can call the police or the coroner but you can't stop me now." Harvey said confidently.

"There's no reason to-"

"I still love her that's my fucking reason Jared." Harvey said raising his voice. "I love my son. And no matter how much your family have isolated me you're still family to me and you're going through a difficult time. I've done everything I could with my life except be with a family and I'm not prepared to let that feeling run away forever."

"Harvey...I'm looking out for you too. Please Harvey; stop. It's just going to give everyone heartache and we can't afford to have another one now. It's going to destroy you more than you _think_ it's going to repair you." Jared said trying to make him understand and he put his hand on his face and closed his eyes.

"I need them. I need her. More than ever." Harvey said running a hand through his hair.

"There's nothing for you here, Harvey. Stay home." Jared said cutting the phone as Harvey kept the phone by his ear for a few moments.

* * *

Angela and Harvey decided to go to the after match celebration tonight. Harvey decided to wear his navy suit with Angela wearing a red dress that she bought from home.

"How long you going to take Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked knocking on his bedroom door.

"Five minutes." Harvey said from his room and putting his pants on.

"You know when women say five minutes we actually mean get the hell away from here we're trying to look as pretty as possible so I'm wondering if it's the same for men." Angela said putting her ear to his door.

"For men five minutes mean five minutes. There's no point of you standing out there, go watch TV or something." Harvey said buttoning the top button of his pants and grabbing his belt.

"Fine. I'll start counting you down…..IT'S THE FINAL COUNTDOWN!" Angela said on her way towards the couch.

 _ **Four minutes and twenty seven seconds later**_

"I'm out now. How was my timing?" Harvey asked smirking as he sat next to Angela.

"You were late." Angela said crossing her arms.

"No way. Harvey Specter is never late." Harvey said shaking his head.

"So you've never come to school or a meeting late where everyone looks at you as if you've mutilated a body and were on national news and trending on Twitter?" Angela asked raising her eyebrow.

"Nope." Harvey said popping the 'p' letter. "Never been late."

"Liar." Angela said putting his hand to his hair. "If you don't tell me the truth I'll ruin your hair."

"You wouldn't." Harvey said widening his eyes as he leaned back slowly.

"You going to test me Uncle Harvey?" Angela asked wiggling her phalanges as she leaned her fingers towards Harvey's hair forcing him to lean back until Angela leaned towards him fast. He quickly grabbed her arms as her fingers were inches from his hair.

"Angela. Stop." Harvey said laughing as Angela laughed back.

"No way Jose." Angela said moving her hands through Harvey's wrists.

"If you touch my hair I'll kiss your Coach in front of your whole class." Harvey said smirking.

"You wouldn't." Angela asked shocked.

"Don't like being in my shoes now, don't you?" Harvey said smirking.

 **KNOCK! KNOCK!**

The both of them heard an urgent pounding coming from the front door.

The chain on the door rattled from the vibrations and made Angela jump back and clench a pillow as she tucked it around her arms looking towards the door.

"Go back to your room, Angie….and be _very_ quiet. Turn off the tv. Turn out the lights. If it gets loud, lock the door and hide in the closet, got it? If you feel like crying then grab Rocket and cover your mouth with her. " Harvey whispered at her and getting her to walk slowly towards her room.

"Why…?"

"Because I said so," Harvey replied sternly.

She did as she was told and crawled into her room. She turned everything off and grabbed Rocket shutting the door. She kept her ear against the door opened the door slowly and listened to Uncle Harvey making his way to the front door, and taking out a gun from the drawer next to the door.

Harvey looked out of the peephole with his right eye and saw the light from the hallway shining on top of the younger man in a hoody which covered his face, dark jeans, a blue shirt and black blazer angrily beating his fist against the door without hesitating as if he demanded to go inside his apartment. Harvey readily pulled the hammer of his gun and cracked the door, "Can I help you?"

It was teenager.

That was all Harvey could gather from the lack of facial hair from his face.

The guy barged his way in, shoving Harvey back with the door and demanding with hard eyes but his face still in the dark. "Where is she?"

"Excuse me, but who the fuck are you?" Harvey said looking down at him placing his finger lightly at the gun's trigger.

Angela recognized the voice immediately and knew she was in deep trouble, "Uh oh…" She took a big breath and tiptoed out of her room and into the main area. Angela met eyes with the intruder and wanted to curl into a ball. The younger man scolded with the hoody still covering his face, "You are in **_so_ ** much trouble…What are you doing here?"

Angela looked to Harvey but clutched Rocket to her neck and answered the intruder, "How did you find me?"

"Did you forget I was coming to watch your last match and the phone call...let's not begin with the phone call I just had." The teenager said. Harvey stood closer to Angela as if he could protect her. Harvey eyed him threateningly as the guy spoke, "After the match I spoke with Coach Dunne and she told me you cancelled your dorm stay. That an **' _Uncle Harvey'_** was bringing you there and taking you back home. Get your stuff. You're leaving…now."

"I don't think so," Harvey completely and defensively stepped in front of Angela who in turn grasped his hand and peeked out from behind him.

"Angela," Harvey looked down at her, "Who is this?"

"I've got a hotel room. You're not spending another moment with this **_stranger_**. What have we taught you about strangers?" The younger man asked scolding her.

"He's **_not_ ** a stranger!" Angela yelled back spitefully.

"What because you've known for a few weeks? He's not your uncle. And if he knew _that_ , he wouldn't have kept you here and taken care of you. He would've turned you away like any kid in the system." The teenager said angrily.

"Yes he would! He's nice and smart and good! He's going to adopt me." Angela said confidently.

" ** _Adopt you?_** He _can't_ adopt you." The younger man said as if it was obvious. "Him adopting you is impossible. You bel—"

"I demand to know what the fuck is going on!" Harvey shouted looking firstly at Angela. He took her shoulders and looked into her eyes as she was chewing on her bottom lip. "Are you my niece or _**not**. _ Don't you dare lie to me Angela!"

"I think it's best if you watch this." The younger man said sighing and handing over a DVD case.

"Please don't do this." Angela begged the younger man.

"What's this?" Harvey asked taking the DVD case and opening it curiously to find a DVD with _'Messages From Home'_ written on it.

"Please don't. I beg you; it'll...please don't watch it." Angela said looking at Harvey.

"What's in here?" Harvey looked looking at Angela and then back up at the younger man whose face was still a mystery of its own since it was still covering his face in darkness.

"The answer to your questions." The younger man said sternly.

"Angela. Why don't you want me to watch this?" Harvey asked looking concerned at her. Tears started to drip down her face as she looked at the teenager.

"Now he's going to hate me! I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!" Angela said screeching as she grabbed Rocket and started to cry into it.

* * *

 ** _SOUNDTRACK: HANS ZIMMER - INTERSTELLAR ORGAN VARIATION_**

Harvey walked towards the DVD player underneath his TV and ejected it open as he took out the Guardians of the Galaxy Blu Ray and placed in the DVD that the teenager gave him. He clicked the close button and turned the TV on as he took out a chair and placed it close to the TV and watched the screen. The DVD played as he saw a nine year old boy in his room recording himself.

The room had movie posters ranging from Toy Story to Batman and showed a bed that he was sitting on.

 _"Hey dad, this is my first video blog. Just finished 3rd grade. Only a few more years till I go to middle school and I'm scared because I don't know what to expect and-"_

 _"I can't do this."_

 _The video stopped for a moment as Harvey looked confused. The next video was the boy at **age 12**._

 _"Hey dad. Decided to make another video after four years. Doesn't really feel like four years but who's complaining?" The teenager said. "Anyway I'm getting straight A's and Mom's over the moon. Mr Macht tell me that I should do law...I'm thinking about it. I'm not sure whether I'd be good at it but I guess time will tell. Mom tells me that she'll take me to Hollywood to see the Walk of Fame. Never really understood why there should be a star with someone's name on it, what if they run out of space?"_

 _"Can I sweakk?" The sound of the little girl said which sounded familiar._

 _"Sure." The teenager said moving out of the camera and re-appearing with a four year old red head on his lap._

 _"Hey **Murph**. Say hello to **Daddy**. Say hello." The teenager said trying to get her to wave at the camera._

 _"Hello Dada." The three year old girl said making the teenager smiling._

 _"What's your name?" The teenager asked smiling and kissing her nose._

 _" **Angela** **Murphy**..._ _ **Spec...Specter**_ _." The three year old girl said._

 _Harvey's mouth opened slowly opened as his world came screeching to a halt so unbelievably fast that Harvey felt the whiplash. In his neck, in his back. Harvey felt chills run through him and freeze his blood over. He looked back at Angela who started to cry at the video and looked back at the DVD and back at the teenager who took his hood off._

 _"Do you miss dada?" The teenager asked._

 _The four year girl nodded as the teenager smiled._

 _"Hey dad." The teenager said a year older. "I'm a year away from being a freshman."_

 _"_ _ **Patrick**_ _I need you downstairs." Came the voice of a woman who's voice was too unrecognizable to not recognize…it was Donna's._

 _"Uhhh, I'll be back." Patrick said as Harvey started to laugh silently but slowly turning into pain seeing his son for the first time in years._

 _"Hey dad. Never got back to making that video. Mom's been on my case all day and Murph just got into Kindergarten. She punched someone after they said that she never had a dad. She's a little rebellious anyway...kinda stubborn I guess. I'm a freshman now and it's great. Managed to make some new friends, they're all great. Sorta like my old friends so I feel right at home. Oh and I sneaked into a party actually; mom never found out at first but when I came back she was sitting in front of the door with a shotgun like she was sitting in front of the chimney on Christmas Day waiting to torture Santa. When she sent me to my room I got a little upset and my mind wondered about what you would have said, you know. Whether you would have punished me even more or whether you'd make Mom calm down but then I realised something that night. I guess it's because I've forgotten you sound like….and…and I-I've got no way of knowing. I try to Google you and you don't exist. Nothing on the database, not even of Twitter. No videos of you and not even a single picture, mom keeps all of them kept under lock and keep. I think mom put some sort of internet filter or something because I tried searching you on my phone and you never came up sorta like the man who wasn't there...now I'm starting to think she's a secret agent...yeah." Patrick said laughing a little as tears started to erupt from Harvey's eyes_

 _"Oh. I met a girl and I think she's the one. I know I'm a little too young for all that but mom says that no one's too young for love. Did you think Mom was the one when you saw her? I hope you did because it's the one fairytale I keep playing on repeat, you and Mom seeing each other and knowing that someday you were going to marry each other and die old." Patrick said smiling to himself as he took out his wallet from his pocket and showing him a picture. "Here's a picture of her, right there. I'm probably going to marry her someday and the good news is that I've got the rest of my life to know her." Patrick said showing a picture of the both of them smiling to the camera as the sounds of Harvey's sobs were slowly coming out._

 _"Hey dad. Been a year since I last recorded a video…This is **Natalie**. How long have been together now? About two years now." A eighteen year old Patrick said with a moustache growing from his upper lip as more tears dripped down Harvey's eyes. "I've good news for you...we're gonna have a baby. I know it's too early but she's the last thing I think of before I go to sleep, and the first I think about when I wake and can't think to live without her. Mom's downstairs crying because she can't believe that I've grown up so fast and that she's proud of me. Oh I got into Cambridge and I'm gonna be doing Law; just like you. I know it's no Harvard but still it's Cambridge and I'm sure you would have been proud of me."_

 _"Sorry it's just been a while." Patrick said with a beard and inside a dorm with a beard. He covered his face as he was about to cry but fought his face as he rubbed his face and looked back at the camera. "Natalie died...with the baby. Your grandson...he's dead. They tried to save him but he died a minute after Natalie. Since I knew the doctor he let me hold him in my arms and I knew he was long ago. I was left along with the loud silence that day, with my dead fiance on the hospital bed and my dead son in my arms.."_

 _Harvey's face dropped even he covered his face not able to control his tears now. "Mom got real upset and she's downstairs crying. It was a boy and wanted to call him after you. I guess she misses you as much as we do but I wouldn't know. All this, you know, it's got me wondering whether I'll find_ _**'the one'** again. I don't know whether she my true love or soul mate and there's a difference. The difference being that one's a choice and one's destiny. Have I now lost my destiny? I...I don't know. All this made me think about you dad. You lost both your true love and soul mate in mom. How do you get over it? Why aren't you here to give me advice?" Patrick said covering his face and sobbing into his hands. "Anyway Mom found out that I've been making these videos and she tells me that I have to let you go."_

 _Harvey started to nod frantically as Patrick looked towards the floor wiping a tear from his face. "I don't know whether this finds you but I'll love you. We'll all love you and bye." Patrick said leaning over to stop the recording of the video. Harvey leaned forward to touch the screen but it'd turn off because he could touch it._

 _He held one end of the TV and the other until Donna showed up on his screen. She looked older and mature but she still had the beauty that he remembered she had. Harvey moved his hands slowly away from the TV and stared at it as Donna struggled to come up with words._

 _"Hey Harvey." Donna said._

 _Harvey turned his head to the side and whispered "Hey Donna."_

 _"How you been you son of a bitch?" Donna asked with a straight face but with a hint of cheekiness that he remembered her for. "I found Patrick's camera and wanted to borrow it and found out he's been making secret messages to you. I asked him about it and I saw his face drop. I didn't punish because how can you punish someone who hasn't seen their dad for 11 years. You'll probably think it was five years because unless you love then time will flash by? The reason I wanted to record this was because today's our wedding anniversary. Our 20th actually considering Patrick's 18 now. 20 god damn years. And it's special because you told me we'd have 3 kids and we'd both be retired living at home by then."_

 _Harvey began to cry his silent cry again as he covered his face not able to look at her anymore._

 _"I think now'd be a great time to see you again." Donna said wiping her face away and turning the camera off._

Harvey turned around to face both of the kids.

"Hey dad."

"Patrick-"

"Now you know why you can't adopt Murph? She already belongs to you. **She's your daughter**."


	15. Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night

"It's a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, smells the same, even feels the same. You realise what's actually changed is yourself." Patrick said looking around and nodding to himself.

"So your mother is…?"

Patrick dipped his chin looking at Harvey as Harvey kept his mouth hanging. "Your wife...Donna."

"Is your mother here? Is she downstairs? In the city? Where is-"

"She's not in New York. She wanted to come with me to see Murph but she had to stay with grandma and grandpa." Patrick said as the trio settled down on different couches that faced each other.

"You're...it's impossible. You can't be 19. You've only been gone seven years." Harvey whispered as Patrick began to laugh.

"I've been gone eleven years Harvey!" Patrick shouted as Harvey looked at him in terror.

"No no. You were gone...no no no. Oh god...I've been so consumed in myself...but you were only five." Harvey whispered as Patrick walked towards him until his mouth was close to his ear.

"I was eight when we left...but you didn't know because you never came to any of my birthdays and you were lost in your own fantasy living out your dream whilst our wife and son were at home waiting for you to come home." Patrick whispered moving his head back as Harvey began to shake her head.

"So you're not 8 and a half?" Harvey asked turning his face to Angela as she began to shake her head.

"I'm 11...I lied." Angela said timidly putting her head down and sitting on a couch.

"Why'd you call her Murph?" Harvey asked looking down at Angela and seeing that she didn't want to speak.

"She actually told me that you wanted to call her that. Mom called her Angela but she prefers to be called Murph because she found out you wanted to call her that." Patrick said putting a hand through his hair which scarily resembled Harvey.

"I never-oh." Harvey said closing his eyes and remembering.

* * *

" _You ever thought about if our baby ends up being a girl?" Donna asked looking down at her 6 month pregnant stomach._

" _You know everyone's a girl unless something happens with the chromosomes. I never really paid much attention in Biology." Harvey asked looking up at the roof._

" _You never paid attention at all in Biology." Donna said turning her head to face her._

" _There was this one time; yeah I don't want to talk about it." Harvey said sighing._

" _So I thought about some names if our baby ends up being a girl." Donna said as Harvey turned his head to face hers._

" _You really want a girl don't you?" Harvey asked placing his hand on her cheek and caressing it with her thumb which sent shivers down her spine._

" _We already have a boy. I like a mix I guess." Donna said smiling with her mouth closed._

" _Just remember that you can't name her Donna not matter how much you love your name." Harvey said placing her arm on Donna's pillow as she lifted her head to rest it on his forearm._

" _I'm just saying that Donna Jr doesn't sound bad." Donna said nodding her head._

" _No one names their daughter junior. It sounds weird." Harvey said shaking her head._

" _Okay so how about Michelle?" Donna asked curiously._

" _She'd sound like a femme fatelle. Unless you were going for that-"_

" _No I wasn't going for that. What was going on in that sick head of yours when you thought of that?" Donna asked looking at him and kissing his chin._

" _I don't really think, words just comes out and my brain just goes along with it." Harvey said tilting his head and thinking about the concept._

" _Instead of asking about each name in your weird sickening detail, I'm just gonna list some." Donna said nodding._

" _You sure?" Harvey said looking down and twirling a strand of hair around his finger._

" _Yup. Emma, Selena, Audrey, Katherine, Sarah, Cara-"_

" _How about Murph if you want something unconventional?" Harvey asked._

" _Over Audrey?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow._

" _I love the name Audrey. I mean, like, Audrey Hepburn was a goddess…even you can agree to that." Harvey said smiling and kissing her cheek._

" _So it's between Audrey and Murph then? Well under the condition that it's a girl when it's probably going to be another boy?" Donna asked as Harvey rubbed her stomach._

" _I guess you could say that. I'll let you name the boy too."_

* * *

"How's…how's mommy?" Harvey asked looking at Patrick.

"I'm not sure why you care. Your happiness was more important than hers and you found out that the less you cared about mom the happier you were." Patrick said harshly which hurt Harvey but he knew he deserved it. "Where you been sleeping Murph?"

"In the room over there." Murph said getting up and leading him to her bedroom. "He decorated it." She said turning the light on as Patrick stood outside to observe every inch of the room.

"I'm not sure a grown man would go through all that energy to do this," Patrick whispered to himself. "Come on, let's go." Patrick said holding her hand.

"I don't want to go. I want to _stay._ " Murph said taking her hand away from Patrick's and walking back to the main area to sit down on the couch.

"She can stay if she wants Patrick." Harvey said looking at him as Patrick turned the bedroom light off.

"You'll have to go home after tomorrow anyway." Patrick said rubbing his face.

"Why?" Murph asked.

"They need us back home. Grandma Mary and Grandpa James. Don't you miss them? Don't you miss mom?" Patrick asked looking at her in shock. Murph didn't answer as she looked up at Harvey and then back at her. "Or has he rubbed off on you so that you don't give a shit about her. That you're prepared to stay here and live in your little fantasy and not care about the people that care the most about you?" Patrick asked as Harvey looked back at him and then back at Murph.

"I'm sorry...I've missed you, Pat." Murph said timidly.

"I've missed you too, Murph." Patrick said sighing. "I'll let you stay here tonight since it's too late for you to go out in the dark." Patrick put his hand in his pockets as Murph smiled enthusiastically.

Murph stretched her body as she walked into her room and changed into her pyjamas and began to lie down onto the bed and slowly fell asleep.

Patrick stood as he turned for the door and walked into the hallway. Harvey got up and quickly chased him following him into the hallway so that Murph couldn't hear them. "I get your situation but I'm still your father and you've no right to speak to or about me the way you do; especially in front of your little sister. You can talk about whatever the fuck you want and say it to my face but you gotta say it to me face to face. Is that the sort of impression you want to give her? She looks up to you."

"Why not? It's the truth." Patrick said stopping and turning around to face her.

"Patrick. I love you and your mother despite what you think." Harvey said understandingly.

"If abandoning us is you showing us love then I wonder whether killing us would've have given you an erection." Patrick said shaking his head in disgust.

" ** _She left me, Patrick!_** And took you—and I didn't even know Murph existed. _She_ cut _me_ off. _She—_ "

"Don't you _dare_ try to turn mom into the villain of your bullshit story! She begged you not to run off to your six month trips and you didn't even consider you. You left us all! And then you didn't come after us. I did my waiting... _eleven_ years of it and you didn't come after us!"

"I _tried_. She didn't want me to. She ran to her father, had him use his military status to black out all information about the two of you. How was I supposed to find someone who'd been wiped out from the face of the planet like they never existed?" Harvey asked trying to reason with him.

"You _could've_ found us if you wanted to. Momma gave you an excuse to use and you took the bait. You're supposed to be the great Harvey Specter, on the cover of Time magazine, Empire so don't give me some bullshit excuse about not finding us!" Patrick said raising his voice louder.

"I've been making plans to start looking again." Harvey said defending himself.

Laughing dryly and without humor Patrick added, "After a decade? Did you suddenly wake up one morning and think about us? What was the point of you coming for us after all this time? If Murph never came you would have carried on with your life wearing your fancy suit and tie, driving your fancy cars and working in your pristine office laughing at jokes from other suit and ties like yourself." Patrick said shaking his head in disgust.

"I was fixing to fly out to Cortland because I figured out—"

"Why should I believe a single word you're telling me?" Patrick asked holding his arms out.

Harvey paused as he stared at Patrick knowing that their relationship was beyond repair. That if they were going to be the same then it'd take months or even years of struggle.

"I thought so...the silence gave it away." Patrick said shaking his head and walking away as Harvey heard the footsteps grow quieter.

* * *

 _Donna was the definition of super-mom. He and Murph may not have had a father but Donna made sure it never felt like their family life was lacking as she did her best to be both a mother and a father._

 _As Patrick for older he realised he was more awake of the smallest details in his surroundings and body language that made him identify if people were telling the truth of hiding a secret. At fourteen, Patrick was aware of the countless sacrifices Donna made for he and Murph. He didn't want to break Murph's heart whenever the issue of 'daddy' was bought up so he did his best to divert attention away from the subject. Unlike her, he grew up with Harvey with his father and didn't have any preconceived idea of what he'd be like so he took it upon himself to protect her as much as he could._

" _You don't have to collect us everyday mom!" Patrick said as Donna got them inside the car._

" _If I never collected you every day I wouldn't give you my secret lemon cake." Donna smiled and handing them slices of lemon cake in a plate with a fork that she prepared for them at home._

" _CAKE!" Murph shouted as she grabbed a plate from her mother and started to eat._

" _Now what do we say before we each Murph?" Donna asked scolding her._

" _Oh. Thanks mom." Murph said with her mouth fall._

" _We also don't talk with our mouth full." Donna said smiling as she handed Patrick a plate._

" _I still don't understand how you have time to make cake with your job." Patrick said shaking his head._

" _I told you before. I come home from work for my lunch break and have enough time to make you guys cake." Donna said starting her car as she started to drive._

" _But you should relax on your break. Not stress out on giving us diabetes." Patrick said as Donna rolled her eyes._

" _You're not going to get diabetes genetically. My parents weren't diabetic and neither were—"_

" _Dads?" Patrick asked as Murph stopped eating for a moment._

" _Yeah." Donna said pausing as she closed her eyes for a minute trying not to remember his face or the pain he bought her. "How about we watch Ant Man tonight?"_

" _Ant Man? YES!" Murph said excited._

" _You sure, because your boss-"_

" _Would be perfectly fine with it because me and her are best friends and she wants me to relax like you guys. We can have some Ben and Jerry's too." Donna said looking at Murph through the mirror as her eyes lit up._

" _You're the best mommy." Murph said smiling._

* * *

Murph walked into the living area in her pajamas with Rocket under her arm. Harvey was lost in his own world, sitting on the couch and staring into the wall. Murph faked a cough his eyes glazed over to her. "Goodnight Uncle—" she caught herself. "Um…...dad."

Harvey turned around to face her as she could still see his red puffy eyes knowing that he'd been crying again. "Goodnight."

"I'll see you in the morning…" Angela said holding Rocket tightly as she turned on her heel to face her room.

"What happened to your hair?" Harvey asked as Murph stood rooted to the spot and turned around slowly.

"I dyed it." Murph admitted. "In the bathroom of the airport."

"You dye it yourself?" Harvey asked looking at her for a moment and analysing her hair.

Murph had her mother's nose and eyebrows and the more he looked at her the more he realised she had his skin colour, eyes, hair, mouth and chin.

"Yeah. You get surprised what you can do with Youtube and motivation." Murph said clutching Rocket tighter.

"Okay...night Ang-" Harvey said sighing and closing his eyes. "I mean Murph."

He thought of all the times Murph spoke about _her mom_ —and he realized those were all glimpses into the family he lost. But why did she have nightmare about her mom and dad.

Every little moment Harvey and Murph shared was twice as special now. Every time Murph fell asleep on him or when she held his hand or hugged his waist …that was his daughter… _she was his and Donna's daughter._

Then there was Patrick who was a grown man.

Harvey stood up standing in the door and watching his daughter sleep calmed him down. He needed to make it up with Patrick first then hopefully with Donna. All he knew that if he had piece with the one of them then he can die peacefully.

* * *

 _"Harvey?" Mike asked walking into Harvey's room and seeing bed sheets undone, the furniture shattered to the ground, clothes from the wardrobe spread out everywhere as he sat on the mattress._

" _She's gone," he sputtered looking up at him. "And she took Patrick with her."_

" _Wait, Donna?" Mike asked shocked as he nodded._

 _"I called everyone and they told me that they weren't sure or she's not there or that they can't say anything. She walked out in front of me and they left me."_

 _"It's probably—"_

" _There's no information on her or Patrick. Nothing on our personal files or our personal computer. Her name's taken off our joint bank account. No receipt, no emails, no credit card details, not even on the office database. It's as if they never existed. They've been wiped from everywhere." Harvey said in defeat._

 _"You don't think—"_

 _"I called her father. He said that Donna contacted him. He had her and Patrick blacked out." Harvey said running a hand through his hair._

 _"She—-maybe she's never gone this far. Maybe she just wanted you to realize she was serious. If you have too then quit work Harvey and find her. Show her that you're serious. And then maybe—"_

 _He clutched the piece of paper sitting by his side, "No Mike. It's too late. I'm too late!"_

 _"No. No, Harvey, she loves you. She loves you more than anything. She'll understand. The two of you will make up and she'll—"_

" _She's not coming back to me. They're gone…Oh God. What am I going to do, Mike? They're gone." Harvey said as he began his sobs hiding his face into his legs not able to look at Mike as he let go of the note. "_

 _Mike walked towards him and slumped next to him as he put his arm around his body trying to relax him but his sobs turning louder._

" _I don't know what to say to you. The only thing I can do is give you advice Harvey and even then I don't even know where to begin." Mike said taking out his phone._

" _Who are you calling?" Harvey mumbled._

" _Rachel." Mike said as he began to dial her number._

" _I don't want anyone to know about this." Harvey whispered._

" _I have to tell her Harvey." Mike said looking down at him._

" _Promise me you'll only tell her." Harvey said moving his head to face him as Mike saw what a mess he was._

" _Only if you promise to tell everyone else." Mike said as Harvey managed to nod his head._

 _ **How do I live?  
How do I breathe?  
When you're not here I'm suffocating.  
I want to feel love, run through my blood.  
Tell me this is where I give it all up?**_

* * *

"I've got to go back and pack some of your things so you're ready for your flight tonight." Harvey said dropping her off to the last day of soccer camp.

Angela nodded as she started to sob silent but not silent enough for him to hear as it broke his heart even more knowing that it wasn't his niece crying but his daughter instead.

"Hey…don't cry." Harvey said kneeling down to soothe her. "I'll be back by the time you finish. I promise. And I'll bring something." But the little girl cried harder. "Murph…what is it? Don't do this to me."

"Are you mad at me for lying to you?" Murph asked wiping her face away.

"No—" Harvey said.

"I lied because I didn't think you'd want me. You loved Patrick and I was afraid I'd never measure up. Can't I just keep and pretending that I'm your niece." Murph said as Harvey felt his eyes well up.

"You're my daughter Murph." Harvey said hugging the little girl as a tear fell from his eyes and placed her head on his shoulder. "Don't you ever say that again. I love you Murph…forever. You're my daughter so stop crying before I do."

* * *

Harvey folded up Murph's clothes and neatly packed them up. Once all her other of clothing were safely settled in the suitcase she brought with her, he ignored the look of an empty closet.

He bent under the bed and he found a journal. He took the journal out and sat onto the bed as he observed. it. It was thick with uneven edges because of the pictures. He opened the cover to the first page and read the title...'THIS BELONGS TO MURPH SPECTER."

He swallowed when he saw a note written in the bottom corner of the page and recognized the handwriting as Donna's.

 _Dear Murph,  
This is a journal to fill up with whatever makes you happiest. Express yourself creatively and never imagining. Keep this out of your sight no matter what.  
Love you to the moon and back.  
Mommy._

Harvey turned another page and saw the heading 'MY DADDY' in Murph's handwriting which made him smile as he looked down at the description.

 **What I know:**

 **Hair color:** Browinsh-sorta like mine. **  
Eye color:** Brown. **  
Height:** 1.84m/6"0  
 **Age:** Same age as mommy  
 **Likes to wear suit and tie.  
Drinks a lot of coffee with cream.  
Watches movies and TV like it's his religion.  
Charismatic enigmatic handsome...whatever that means **_(Note:must consult dictionary)_

Harvey flipped through the rest of the pages. There were tickets from the football match, the picture with David Beckham with kisses next to it which made him smile, and read the description underneath the Polaroid photos like reading someone's diary. He placed the journal onto the bed and checked for more stuff underneath her bed until he saw something that caught his curiosity.

He took out a cardboard box and placed it onto his lap. He took the lid of the box off and saw pictures of him and Donna and the two of them with Patrick. He took the photos out and saw one of his red ties inside it as he remembered that he lost it a few days ago. She wanted to take a memento and it made him smile. It also had Donna's scarf which he felt as he placed the scarf onto the bed. He then saw a marriage certificate folded as he opened it and started at her name. Underneath the certificate was their wedding invitation and-

An unsent letter from Donna addressed to him.

He took the letter out and stared at the creases knowing that it must have been a few years old as he began to read it.

 **Dear Harvey,**

 **I've written this letter over and over but couldn't handle the pain it bough to finish it. I don't know how to tell you this, especially now, but I'd feel better if you knew…I found out I was pregnant just before we separated. We have a daughter named Murph. She was born March 19th. She's beautiful. Smart like you, even has you looks but she has my hair. I think I'm going to enrol her in a soccer class so she doesn't use up her energy she was born with to procrastinate all day. Please don't be angry with me. I'm sorry for not telling you. I wanted you to make your decision free of the mental obligation to another child. Patrick's doing well in school. The three of us are doing good and living… well where we are now. I hope everything is well for you and work gets easier for you.**

 **It's never too late to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit because you know you can stop whenever you want. You can change or stay just the way you are, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you again. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again. And most importantly I hope you fall in love again. I hope you find someone who doesn't make you sad at night and someone who reminds you how much they love you every day and who laughs at yours jokes and wants to listen to your music who genially wants to be with you and doesn't make you second guess their love for you.I relly hope you find that because beauty at its greatest peak excites the most sensitive soul to tears and I know how that sounds when I have to admit that I was never really insane until you touched my heart.**

Take care,  
-Donna

* * *

"I wanted to give you the card before you go on." Harvey said handing Murph a card.

"What's inside it?" Murph asked.

"Just a little message I wrote for you." Harvey said smiling.

They moved to the side and ripped open the envelope. She opened the card and was bombarded by writing...writing...and more writing.

 **Dear Murph,**

 **I might not have been there for you when you were born or when you kicked your first soccer ball but I watched you grow onto me like no one else since Donna or Patrick. When you wake up tomorrow morning, wake up and chase more of your dreams. Persist. I never want you to stop dreaming. We've always defined ourselves by the ability to overcome the impossible. And we count these moments, these moments when we dare to aim higher, to break barriers, to reach for the stars, to make the impossible possible. We count there moments as our proudest achievements but we lost all that. Or perhaps we've forgotten that we're still pioneers and we've barely begun and our greatest accomplishments can't be put behind us because our destiny lies above us.**

 **Keep being just like your mother—create, imagine, inspire.**

 **Be an original and be prepared for people to copy. There's not enough originality left in this world.**

 **Most importantly thank you….**

 **Thank you for finding me.**

 **I'm promising you that from now on I will be there whenever you want me to be there for you. You are one of the three most important people in my life and heart and I am so, so, extremely proud to call you my little girl.**

 **Do not go gentle into that good night,**  
 **Old age should burn and rave at close of day;**  
 **Rage, rage against the dying of the light.**

 **Though wise men at their end know dark is right,**  
 **Because their words had forked no lightning they**  
 **Do not go gentle into that good night.**

 **Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright**  
 **Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,**  
 **Rage, rage against the dying of the light.**

 **Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,**  
 **And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,**  
 **Do not go gentle into that good night.**

 **Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight**  
 **Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,**  
 **Rage, rage against the dying of the light.**

 **And you, my father, there on the sad height,**  
 **Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.**  
 **Do not go gentle into that good night.**  
 **Rage, rage against the dying of the light.**

 **You may not understand this but in good time it'll make sense.**

 **I Love You Forever,**

From your superlawyer  
Dad

Murph's eyes were shining. Murph hugged the card and then grinned up at Harvey and hugged his waist, "I love you, Daddy."

Harvey dropped down to her level to hug her back and let her squeeze his neck, "I love you too, Murph."

Murph spotted Patrick over Harvey's shoulder first. "Hi Pat."

"Ahem," someone expectantly cleared their throat behind them and knocked on a nearby prop to call more attention to himself.

Murph lit up and squealed with an abundance of excitement, "Uncle Huntley! I can't believe you're here!"

Stephen chuckled, "Well I'm not one to miss a party even if it's all the way in Newwwww Yorkkkkk."

Harvey's eyes were blown wide.

What.

The.

Fuck.


	16. I'll Always Love You My Bella

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Harvey asked grabbing Stephen by his collar and scrunching it as he felt his blood boiling with rage.

"Dad, what are you doing?" Patrick asked trying to break Harvey's grip on him as Stephen held his hands out as he never came to fight.

"This is my favourite part. The first reaction after you see someone you never expected to ever see again. So let me ask you Harvey Specter what are you gonna do? Throw another sucker punch at me? Throw me against the mirror over there because there's more than one way to kill a man. You can kill his physical body or you can kill his spirit within but there's another way it goes. Where you try and you fail." Stephen said as he slowly lifted up his suit jacket showing a gun attached to a holster. "And the bullet finds you Harvey."

"Let's keep this simple then." Harvey said bitterly as Stephen smirked and put down his suit jacket.

"Dad; don't hurt Uncle Stephen." Murph said looking concerned at him.

"Do you have any idea who this man is?" Harvey asked looking at his kids as he put his hands off him and stared at his kids.

"He's only the man that's been raising us for the past few years." Patrick said looking to see if Stephen was okay as Stephen dismissed him.

"What?" Harvey asked looking at Patrick in confusion.

"Harvey it's a long story." Stephen said sorting out his shirt collar. "That's a shame, I loved this tie."

"If it's a long story then I've got all day to listen to the audiobook version of it and it better be a best seller because I don't like this…Not. One. Bit." Harvey said spitting venom and bitterly pointing his finger as Stephen.

"You two get inside and let us sort it out." Stephen said to Patrick and Murph as Patrick took Murph as far away as possible from the both of them.

"Harvey. Long time no see." Stephen said looking at him.

"I wish it'd been longer and do me a favour and cut the crap. How the fuck did you get out?" Harvey asked clenching his fist.

"I got a job offer from the British government that cut my incarceration time." Stephen said shrugging. "It's like you said, keep it simple."

"Bullshit. No one would hire a murderer because last I checked you aren't Napoleon Solo." Harvey said walking towards him as he pushed him to the wall. Stephen groaned a little but put his head down knowing that he had to stay composed as he then looked up at him.

"Desperate times, desperate measures." Stephen said taking a step forward from the wall.

"No one's ever that desperate." Harvey said looking down at him.

"That's what I thought but what they wanted was information and what I wanted was a way out. We were both on the same page and believe me when I say that we shook hands whilst holding a rock in the other." Stephen said taking another step as Harvey pushed him against the wall again.

"I still don't-"

"You can push me all you want but I know how much the truth hurts. I'm a changed man. I've learned my lesson, paid my dues and I wanted to settle down. If you know me based on who I was over a decade ago then you don't know me at all." Stephen said holding his hand up.

"A changed man doesn't go after the woman who's heart you broke" Harvey said nodding his head and putting his hands on his hips then looking up at him with a look of curiosity on his face. "How'd you managed to find her if I couldn't?"

"I was in a café in England. Must have been a Wednesday because it's one of the only days I can get a damn fine cup of coffee and I'm looking through the window until I see the shadow of a familiar figure staring down at me. I turn my face around to see her and at first she looks as angry as a bull chasing a Spaniard wearing a red Spain top. She sat down and we spoke after a while and slowly I got to know her more and that's how we end up here. Me against the wall in New York facing an overly aggressive Harvey Specter. You ask me personally I think it's your age catching up to you." Stephen said looking at Harvey and he shook his head in disbelief.

"She wouldn't just let you back into her-"

"She would and she did because you hurt her more than I did." Stephen said taking a shot at Harvey.

"She told you everything?" Harvey asked almost punching the wall in frustration.

"Every single moment; every single emotion. I'm not the enemy here Harvey. I'm just here to go to Angela's party. You can reject me and say whatever you want but them kids treat me like a family member and you're gonna have to get used to it." Stephen adjusting his jacket and walking inside to catch up with them.

* * *

"So you're friends? I bet it's really nice to see each other again!" Murph said looking at Harvey as Stephen looked at her.

"Yeah. It's just something we do whenever we see each other to make people think we're sworn enemies. I mean I could have called him a bast…I mean basket." Harvey said looking at Murph and controlling his language.

Stephen hailed a cab at the curb. As soon as one pulled up Patrick places Murph's suitcases in the taxi trunk and sat in the back seat. "Why don't you take the little one's bags with you and we'll collect it all on our way to the airport?"

"Why can't Daddy come eat with us?" Murph asked looking at Stephen. "I don't much time with him anymore."

"Have any recommendations?" Stephen asked looking at Harvey.

"How about pizza?" Angela asked looking at Stephen.

Stephen huffed as he walked into the back seat and called Patrick out and took out Murph's suitcases.

"You're driving us then." Stephen said handing Harvey the suitcases.

* * *

Murph spent the whole time talking to Stephen and Patrick of her tales in New York. Everything from going to watch the soccer game to watching Guardians Of The Galaxy on Broadway and meeting David Beckham.

Stephen stood from Harvey's couch and rounded them up, "Patrick. Angela. We gotta go; we can't be late for our flight. It's not like planes fly for free."

Patrick put his suit jacket back on and headed towards the door and waited in the hallway. Murph hugged Harvey's arm and gave him the puppy dog eyes, "I want Daddy to come with us."

"Your mom doesn't want that," Stephen intervened.

"How would you know?" Harvey asked angrily.

"I've spent the last five years with her and I'm pretty sure I know what I'm talking about. Angela grab Rocket and let's go." Stephen said pointing to her bedroom.

"Uncle Stephennnnn..." she whined.

"You can't force my daughter to leave me, if she doesn't want to." Harvey said standing up and sizing him up as Murph decided to let go to prevent herself from potentially getting hurt.

"I'm not forcing her, she'll come using logic. If it came down to a question of Dad or Mommy then these two will always pick Donna. If you want a word of advice, not that you'll take it because you're biggest flaw was being stubborn, is that stick to visiting in the holidays and sending cards monthly . That is if you can find us." Stephen said with a smirk on his face.

"I was already planning a trip to Cortland." Harvey said taking out his boarding pass from his pocket and showing Stephen

Stephen busted out into laughter, "Good luck with that, pal. Walk on with hope in your heart that you'll find her."

"Uncle Stephen, maybe Harvey should come. Maybe—"

"Don't be daft Patrick?" Stephen said in disbelief.

"We might not like the idea but mom might. Maybe she would—"

"Like hell she would." Stephen said taking the luggage and walking towards the door.

"You can't keep him from her just because you're afraid she'll still love him." Patrick said dropping a suitcase and walking towards Harvey.

Stephen face turned pale in an instant. His jaw clenched looking at Harvey and then back at Patrick, "I'm responsible for the two of you and as someone who's responsible you listen to everything I say and what I'm saying is that we're leaving."

"You're not our dad. You don't have that authority over me or my sister." Patrick said standing his ground and walking further towards Stephen.

"Your mother gave me that authority you're talking about." he warned back with his eyes.

"And you're still not my legal or biological parent." Patrick said maintaining his tone.

"Thank you." Harvey said earning a glare from Stephen.

"Neither are you." Patrick said looking at Harvey.

"Neither of you read us bedtime stories, helped us with our homework, listening to our problems or came to our parents evening. None of you were there for Murph's first soccer game or when I almost broke my knee. When I was with Natalie." Patrick said pausing as he felt himself choke up a little as Harvey remembered about the death of his fiancé and child. "Mom raised us by herself. We don't belong to anyone but her."

"Then we're going to belong to no one!" Murph said running to her bedroom and slamming the door shut.

Patrick dropped the suitcases and tried to open the door but she'd locked it from the inside. "Murph…open the door. I'm sorry I didn't mean to say that! I miss her too…"

"What are they talking about?" Harvey asked confused and looked at Stephen.

"They haven't told you?" Stephen asked looking at him as Harvey gave back a confused look from his face and eyes.

"Told me what?" Harvey asked almost whispering.

"My God, they haven't….Donna. She was in a wreck five months ago. Accident...she's been in a coma since."

"Wait, she was in the accident with Mary and John?" Harvey asked feeling his knees go weak.

"They weren't in the accident."

"No. I spoke to Jared." Harvey said shaking his head. He told me they weren't home. They were in the hospital because of a family emergency…an accident." Harvey said realising that she was involved in an accident. "Oh god."

He slumped and looked the children. Patrick had slid down against the door with his head in his knees and his shoulders shaking.

"We sent Murph to soccer camp because it'd already been paid for and we thought it would get her mind off the scarier things. She couldn't sleep. She'd scream for Donna all night. We had to get her away for a while." Stephen said looking at Harvey.

* * *

 _"Uncle Stephen...Uncle Stephen...UNCLE STEPHEN!" Stephen heard with the sound of a scream sending him quickly to Murph's room._

 _"What is it, Darling?" Stephen asked hugging her and looking down at her._

 _"I want to go back to the hospital." Murph asked whispering._

 _"It's too late darling." Stephen said rubbing Murph's arm._

 _"But I want my Mommy," Murph said squeezing Rocket._

 _"I know but visiting hours are over. They won't let us in." Stephen whispered trying to make her understand._

 _"Please, Uncle Stephen." Murph said as her eyes began to well up. "I need her."_

 _"We'll go in the morning, I promise. As soon as they—"_

 _"No. I need my mom now," She said covering her face. Stephen tried to pull her into a reassuring hug but the little girl moved away from his and ran for the front door._

 _"Murph," Stephen said running after her._

 _"I'll go by myself!" Murph said unlocking the door and accidently setting off the alarm._

 _"Murph you gotta understand. You can't-"_

 _"LET ME GO! MOMMY!" Angela shouted as Stephen grabbed her shouting on top of the sound of the alarm that could wake up the whole neighbourhood._

 _"Murph, they don't let anyone this late at night." Stephen said locking the door and finally letting her go._

 _"Who set the alarm?" Mary asked emerging from her room._

 _Murph ran towards her grandma and hugged her as she buried her head on her stomach and cried. "I want to see her."_

 _"Murph, you know we can't see mom in the morning." Patrick said hearing the noise and shutting the door behind to his room as he rubbed his eyes._

 _"But I want—"_

 _"Not everything is about YOU! You don't think I miss mom too? I've had more time than her than you. I should be the one more upset but-"_

 _"You SHOULD be! It's YOUR fault!" Murph shouted at her._

* * *

"What about…what about Patrick?"

"He was handling is better than usual until Murph left. It broke him not having his sister next to him. They grew up with each other and they're almost like best friends and he needed his best friend with him. He's always on edge. Some days he sleepwalks at night, and he'll just walk around the neighborhood like a zombie trying to find her car. It's gotten much worse this week, he almost got ran over but luckily we know the guy and he knew Patrick and drove him back home. He didn't realise what happened until he woke up; thought it was just another one of his nightmares."

"What they saying about Donna?" Harvey asked looking Stephen in the eye.

Following a deep breath, Stephen let some tears loose, "They don't think Donna's going to wake up. They told us they're giving her another two weeks before they pull the plug."

"There must be something we can do."

"If you've got a suggestion then I'll welcome it like a new religion." Stephen said raising his hands.

"There's something I can do. Me and Donna never signed divorce papers meaning we're still legally married. We had our papers drawn up and notarized together; she gave me durable power of attorney. I could extend her time while we FIND a loophole. It's nothing but it's worth a try."

"Better book a flight to London then."

* * *

 _"Wanna watch Batman or Batman and Robin?" Murph asked Patrick who handed her a plate of vanilla ice cream covered with chocolate streaks._

 _"Did you really ask me that?" Patrick asked sitting down next to her._

 _"I was curious to see if you secretly love Batman and Robin." Angela said smirking as she inserted the Batman blu ray._

 _"I'd rather kiss Nicky Minaj then watch Batman and Robin." Patrick said rolling his eyes._

 _"So when is she coming to our house to make out with you then? Can I record the both of you so I get money from Youtube?" Angela asked giggling as she sat back down on the couch next to her._

 _Patrick looked at his phone again and he was getting concerned because his mother wasn't picking up the phone. She told him that she was going to come a few hours ago but nothing expect for a voicemail._

 _"Let me check if mom's picking up, one sec Murph." Patrick said getting to walk into the kitchen_

 _He leaned as close to the machine speakers as possible: "Donna Paulsen has been checked into Longsmith Hospital after being involved in a horrible accident involving several vehicles. Return calls to this number for further information. Thank you."_

 _The boy sprinted into the living room and her off the couch, grabbed her one disposed shoe and dragged her to the front door, "Hurry. Put on your shoe and a jacket; we have to go."_

 _"Why? Where we going?"_

 _"WE HAVE TO GO."_

 _"Patrick!" The little girl protested, "We can't go! We'll get in trouble. We have to wait for Mom!"_

" _Murph listen to me for once!"_

" _Then tell me why we have to go." Murph said stopping and looking up at Patrick._

" _Mom was in an accident. She's in the hospital."_

"Mom's been in an accident? How? Where? Is she dead?" Murph asked concerned as she felt her heart drop.

" _Don't say that!" Patrick said running towards his car and getting Murph to sit on the passengers seat._

" _Patrick, you don't have your license yet!" Murph said quickly putting her seatbelt time._

 _"There's no time for caution Murph!"_

* * *

Harvey woke up from his sleep on the plane to the sound of Patrick and Murph whispering next to them. He sat all the way by the window with Stephen separating the both of them.

"Grandma and Grandpa are going go insane when Harvey walked in with us." Patrick said sighing and tapping his feet on the floor worried.

"Why?" Murph asked.

"He's not their favorite person since he and mom separated. They hate him even if you mention his name." Patrick said trying to make her understand.

"But Uncle Stephen seems fine with him." Murph said resting her head on Patrick's shoulder.

"Looks can be deceiving Murph. They hate each other; no one pretends to beat the other guy up just for a laugh." Patrick said sighing and tilting his head against Murph's.

"You never know. Grandma and Grandpa may not mind..."

"The second Grandpa looks on Harvey he's going to swing his southpaw and uppercut Harvey on the chin. We might as well record it and call it World War 3."

"Why don't you call Daddy 'Harvey'?" Murph asked curiously.

"He's just someone I got half my looks from and my hair colour, nothing else. He wasn't there for me when I grew up so when he comes back into my life why should I call him dad?" Patrick asked.

"But he's not a stranger. You call him Harvey like he's a stranger." Murph said looking up at her brother's face.

"That's what he treated us like." Patrick said shaking his head.

"You don't have to be so mean to him. He's missed you and mommy." Angela said getting off Patrick's shoulder and looking him in the eyes.

"Yeah right." Patrick said folding his arms and rolling his eyes.

"He told me himself. He cried for the both of you; that's how much he cared about you. He isn't the best actor, trust me I know that but I know when someone's crying for real. He wouldn't cry for no reason, no one cries for no reason Pat. He told me about how much he hated losing mommy over and over again and about his nightmares. He cried himself to sleep and he doesn't wake up from his nightmares either. He lets it all sink in and he gets tested like no one else could imagine. He just wanted you and mommy back."

* * *

When the plane landed the first thing they did was drive to the hospital since the time was only 10 in the morning. Stephen dropped them off at the front entrance so he could park the car.

Immediately when getting to the hospital room, Murph hurried around to the other side of the curtain so she could see Mommy but her path was blocked by her grandparents standing up and opening arms for welcome hugs.

"Grandpa! Grandpa!" Murph said hugging them enthusiastically with Patrick being less cheerful.

"Oh, my babies. I've missed my sunshine so much. The place's been so dark without your smile." Mary said hugging them together as they felt like they were getting squashed.

"Remember what we said about your hugs." Patrick said smirking.

"Hugs are good." Murph said kicking Patrick lightly in the shin. "They help release chemicals that make you feel better!"

"Where's Stephen?" James asked sitting back down in the chair and picking up his newspaper.

"Parking." Patrick commented. "Me and Murph have to tell you something."

"What? What happened?" Mary asked looking concerned.

"Murph…..she found out about Harvey. Literally. In New York." Patrick said as Murph looked shocked about him telling the truth.

James got up in arms angry as Mary put her hand on her heart and met the both of them with silence. Mary opened her mouth and tried to conjure up words but were dismissed by the horror of her thoughts.

"How did this all happen?" James asked as if he was ready to go 12 rounds with Mike Tyson.

"She cancelled dorm and hunted him down. She'd been staying with him this whole time and he—"

"What is he doing here?" James asked looking at Harvey who remained in the doorway as Stephen walked in.

"He found a way of helping us with the legal issues." Stephen said putting his hand on James's shoulders.

"Then hire another god damn lawyer. There are millions of lawyers in the world and you picked him? I have enough money to hire a lawyer, fire him and make him my fucking slave." James said spitting venom looking at Harvey.

"You really think I wanted this?" Stephen asked taking his hands off his shoulder.

"Get him out," growled the man.

"James...let's not—"

"He has no god damn right to be here." James said looking at his wife and then at Harvey. "I want you OUT of my little girl's room before I call the cops and your stupid little ass inside a prison cell!"

* * *

Harvey put his head in respect, Harvey backed out of sight. He sat down onto the chair of the waiting room and listening to their conversation about how bad the breakfast was on the airplane so they never had any. Murph, Patrick, Stephen and James emerged from the room and walked past Harvey with Murph looking at him and back forward, Patrick handing his head in shame, Stephen looking sorry and James looking like he'd want to punch him.

"Harvey?"

Harvey looked up from his shoes and turned his head to the room to see Mary calling him over. He got up and silently walked inside the room as Mary shut the door.

"If you want to see her, do it when James's occupied." Mary said sympathetically.

Harvey was terrified of what he'd find behind the curtain.

"In the first month they wouldn't let Murph to see her because she was unrecognisable with the swelling and bruising that her face suffered from the removing of the glass shards. She broke her ribs, fractured her bones and they were worry that she almost popped her jugular vein." Mary explained.

"How-how have the kids handled it?" Harvey asked leaning against the wall and Mary looked onto the floor shaking her head.

"Patrick couldn't spend a full minute in Donna's room when he first saw her. He'd run out to the bathroom and throw up trying to control his breathing and we couldn't risk Murph having nightmares." Mary said as Harvey nodded.

"Can I?" Harvey asked pointing to the curtains.

 _ **SOUNDTRACK: JOHN TAVENER - FUNERAL CANTICLE - TREE OF LIFE (5:36 MINS)**_

He slowly opened his curtain with his eyes closed and once he could see the ray of sunshine hitting his eyes through the window he opened them slowly to see her lying on the bed. Mary put her head down as she respectably closed the curtain back because she wasn't prepared to see what he'd do when he'd see her in the state she was in.

Harvey stared Donna and he smiled at first. She looked more her age but still looked like the woman from the remaining pictures he had of her. She laid peacefully with the sound of the monitor checking her brain activity as well as her heartbeat.

He thought he was in a dream and that he needed to wake up now because this will never happen and could never happen in reality. It was too much for him, too unreal. He stretched towards her slowly and felt her pulse and felt himself choke up a little because he knew he wouldn't dreaming when he felt a steady but weak pulse.

"It's me Donna." Harvey said lifting up her hand and kissing the back it and slowly moving his fingers inside hers and keeping them tight as he placed his other hand over hers. "I told you that I'd come back for you…because I promised I'd find you. They didn't believe me, they thought I was crazy but that what I'm supposed to do. I'm supposed to keep promises I can keep...because I'm your husband."

Slowly he placed his face on top of his hand and tried hard not to cry.

"I'm here now Donna. I'm here. I heard about your crash and they told me that you probably wouldn't wake up that they'd stop the machine. I'm here because no husband should have let their kids watch their mother die."

Harvey dropped to his knees and his head curled just beneath hers and both his hands clasped one of hers and clutched it against his cheek.

"I'm so sorry Donna. You wouldn't be here if it wasn't for me. I shouldn't have left you…ever. I love you, I love you, I love you. I'll always love you my Bella but please please please don't die and leave me." Harvey whispered weeping with tear drops running down her arm and soaking the hospital sheets under her elbow.

"Harvey." Mary said stepping in politely and feeling devastated at what she was seeing. "They should be done eating by now, you can't let your kids to see you like this."

He pushed himself against the bed and forced himself to his feet. "You don't know how sorry I am for doing this to you all. For Donna being in the accident."

"You were as far away as any of us were when it happened." Mary said patting his cheek and wiping his tears away with her thumb."It's more of a tragedy a wife's husband wasn't by her side when it happened."

"She would've never been in London if it wasn't for me." Harvey whispered shaking his head.

"And if my sister Emma never took her to her first theatre show when Donna was seven then she would have never pursued acting then getting the job at the DA's office to eventually finding the man God chose to be her partner. If she never met you then she wouldn't have given me them grandchildren I adore." Mary said putting her hands off Harvey's cheek and smiling.

"If it weren't for them I'd stand in traffic and kill myself if it meant she's still be walking freely." Harvey whispered back.

"Daddy I got you a blueberry muffin." Murph said from the hall as Harvey took his hands and wiped his face clean of tears, sniffing one last time.

"Thanks. I'm just gonna go to the bathroom." Harvey said forcing a smile and walking away from the room and eventually running towards it.

He ran into the bathroom and leaned against the door putting his hands on his face and weeping loudly not caring if anyone would listen to him.


	17. Murphy's Law

"So. You're here to help. And how do you suppose you'll do that?" James said looking at Harvey grumpily.

Harvey looked up slowly at him seeing the older man now calm compared to his first reaction. He knew he could work with him being as calm as he was right now, any angry and he's feel the need to leave the room in respect.

"I'm going to get in contact with our joint attorney….Travis." Harvey said shaking his head.

"We've tried talking to him but he said that he's not willing to fly all the way to London without a big fee." James said.

"Leave Travis to me." Harvey said assuring him.

"He also said he can't give any information legally and he's only spoken with the doctors." Stephen said entering the conversation.

"When Donna and I got married we signed healthcare proxies that gave power of attorney to each other. Since we're still legally married I still have legal authority to extend her life support. I can overrule her doctors' decision." Harvey said as Stephen leaned against the door watching the two men interact with each other. "I'll be in the waiting room down the hall if you need me."

* * *

Only a maximum of 2 people could stay overnight in Donna's room everyone agreed that Patrick and Murph should go home since they haven't had proper rest since the flight.

"I'll stay tonight." James offered.

"Mary, why don't you go ahead and take the kids home? I'll drop Harvey at whatever hotel and circle back to stay with James." Stephen said to Mary as Patrick looked at Stephen.

"I think Harvey should stay in our house." Patrick said looking from Donna's bed.

"Where are you going to put him?" Stephen asked baffled. "Your mom's room? Because I can tell you that's a big no no."

"On the couch." Patrick suggested harshly.

"He'll hang half off. What if he falls down and breaks his back?" Murph asked looking at him and folding her arms in disgust.

"Fine he can sleep in the guest room downstairs then." Patrick said sighing.

"I don't want to cause any arguments here because I've already caused enough. I'll stay in a hotel if that's easy for all you. The last thing I want to do is make is awkward for you." Harvey said placing his hands back into his pockets.

"Thank you," James said accepting his decision.

"But honey it's not about what we all want." Mary said looking at her husband. "It's about what Donna would do. She'd be hospitable. Especially to Harvey, no matter how awkward it'd be."

"Sort it out among yourselves. I'm gonna watch Dallas repeats." James said grumbling as he put the TV on and changed the station. "Damn UK channels."

* * *

The house Donna was living in was beautifully laid out with spacious living accommodation. There were part rendered and part brick faced elevations, principally set beneath a pitched tiled roof, with relief offered by large brick chimney stacks, as well as single storey bay windows and dormer windows to the front facade.

It was ideally suited to keep both the family safe and entertained, with a large living in which you could host a party.

Harvey stepped aside to let Mary pass him as he looked around the house. It was everything Donna wanted, it had all her trademarks. The house smelled wonderful...like Donna. "You don't have to stand in the doorway all night, Harvey."

"I don't know where you'd want me to go." Harvey said looking at her nervously. "I mean look at this place. It's amazing."

"Leave your shoes here. I've a phobia of bacteria." Mary said pointing to the shoe stand as he followed her instruction. "Come upstairs and follow me into this room." He did so as she led her to the guess room. "You can put your bags in the guest room and you'll be sleeping here. Follow me upstairs, there's a shower in there."

Harvey left his bags in the guest room and shut the door behind as he followed her upstairs.

"Here, these are fresh." Patrick said carrying a pile of folded sheets, a blanket, and pillow and leaving them on the coffee table at the end of the hallway.

"My room is first on the left." Murph said proudly, "I can't wait for you to see it!"

She grabbed his hand and dragged him towards her room with a grin. She opened her door and walked in with his mouth dropping. Everything about it was a child's dream. Donna still had great interior design and she could have had a secret degree for all he knew. The whole room popped of colours that made it feel charismatic and energetic. Pink, blue, lilac, green, red, colours of all spectrum bombarded him like a child tasting candy or the first time.

Harvey helped unzip her bags and placed her journal one her bookshelf along with a book of Moby Dick that she picked up on the way of going home. Once they placed her clothes and memento's away they walked out of the bedroom and passed Patrick's room.

"So how long you been living in London?" Harvey asked looking at her as they entered the living room.

"All my life." Murph said sitting down on the couch and patting the space next to her to sit down.

"How come you don't have a British accent?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrows.

"Because the family hate it when I speak like this." Murph said in a flawless Essex accent.

"Oh god you have an Essex accent? Switch, now!" Harvey said closing his ears with his hands.

"But why, don't you like the way I speak?" Murph said still in her Essex accent.

"I'd rather you shoot my knee than listen to that." Harvey said as Murph rolled her eyes and put on The Only Way Is Essex.

"Oh my god they all have the accent." Harvey said covering his ears tighter.

"Marian. Hand me my beer." Murph said in a Kentucky accent.

"We all don't speak like that." Harvey rolling his eyes.

"And you're all not fat and obese too. Did you know that the most obese state in America is still lower than the overall obesity rate in the whole of America?" Murph asked grinning.

"You're trying to say we're fat and stupid?" Harvey asked questioning her.

"Well yeah except you. You're one in a million...because you're not fat or stupid. But neither is George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Matt Dayymun, Chris Pratt..."

"Chris Pratt was fat once upon a time." Harvey said cutting her off.

"And now he's guarding the galaxy, fighting dinosaurs with Velociraptor and probably going to fight Nazi's with a hat and whip." Murph said leaning her head on Harvey's shoulders.

"You've seen ALL the Indiana Jones movies?" Harvey asked smiling.

"That's what happens when mommy is a film freak. We don't really have a choice because it's either watch Indiana Jones or watch mommy watch Indiana Jones." Murph said sighing and remembering movie nights with her and Patrick.

"She gets that from me by the way." Harvey said smiling.

"Says the one who likes Robert Pattinson." Murph said challenging her.

"He's a good actor, he just can't take away the stench from Twilight." Harvey said shrugging.

"So what do you want to watch daddy?" Murph asked leaning her head against Harvey's shoulder.

"Not Love Actually. Please skip that." Harvey said staring at Liam Neeson's face.

"But why?" Murph asked giggling.

"Here's why Love Actually is actually horrible. There's nudity. The Martin Freeman story line, do you really wanna watch sex acts in the same room as your grandmother? You want your mom to know you know them sex positions? No! Well that was very awkward and there's infidelity with the Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson storyline about a man cheating on his wife with his hot German secretary whilst your Aunt and Uncle are sitting in the same room that had the same thing happen to them a year ago which is why Uncle Bob was living in a hotel for 11 months and I don't wanna be in the room when that's going on. Colin Firth also gets cheated on and gets out of the country to write a novel. You cousin also wants to write a novel and you don't want him believing he can write a novel like everyone else because he lives in a lonely motel room with a Yahoo jacket and has a storyline that's been used in every single erotica novel. Liam Neeson's wife dies and so does your brother's wife two years ago. Claudia Schiffer isn't going to come and make him feel any better so no Christmas gift will stop his tears and Liam Neeson's son is obssessed over a girl and learns that 'he's in love' with her and chases her to the airport promoting stalkingism. Your sister is gonna see this and start believing in love which is a crime number one and you'll have to bail her out of airport jail. The last one is that Hugh Grant dances by himself in the movie and your family is gonna be there and they're gonna learn you really really really love that scene. Love Actually...the worst film to watch with your family." Harvey said as Murph's jaw dropped.

"Okay so it's Love Unactually then." Murph said as they settled on watching a random episode of Doctor Who to which Murph started to sing the theme song too which was just composed of random noises that scared him a little but made him glad that he was bonding with her knowing that she was his daughter.

* * *

Murph was snuggled in her blankets up to her chin as Harvey pulled over a chair from her table to sit by her bed. "Can you tell me a bedtime story?"

"That was more of Donna's specialty and-"

"I wanna hear one from you. I wanna know how you'd tell a story, I mean you're a super lawyer so I wanna hear a story fom you." Murph said pouting her lip and giving her pouty eyes which sent him over the edge as he smiled.

"Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle, he was so ugly that everyone died. The end." Harvey said smiling as Murph started to lean downwards on her bed.

"That wasn't a nice story, besides Patrick told it better and less creepily in Spongebob." Murph said pouting.

"Fine. Ever head of The Lion and The Mouse?" Harvey asked looking down at her.

"Don't think I have." Murph said smiling and turning on her side to face Harvey.

"I don't remember much of it but-"

"Try your best." Murph said reassuring him.

 **"A _lion was sleeping one day when a little mouse came and ran up and down over his face. The lion woke up and it made him very angry. He put his paw over the mouse and picked him up and say 'What do you mean by making me? You shall pay for this,'_** Harvey said in a growling voice making Murph laugh.

"Your lion impression is horrible." Murph said smiling.

"You should hear my mouse impression. Anyway **_"Oh, do not kill me, Mr. Lion!" the mouse squealed,_** Harvey said in a squeaky voice.

"I prefer your lion one." Murph said.

 ** _"'I did not mean to waken you. Do let me go and I will never trouble you again.' The mouse said looking at the lion and asking for forgiveness. '_** ** _No, I will not let you go,' roared the lion. The mouse looked frightened and said 'please do' as it cried. 'If you let me go I can do something for you in the future' the mouse said. This made the lion laugh as he looked at the mouse. 'You do something for ME? What a joke! You're such a little fellow, I'll let you go this time but never let me see you here again,' the lion said lifting his paw as the mouse scampered off. The mouse said 'Thank you kind lion, I won't forget your kindness.' Some time after, the lion was caught in a trap by hunters as they tied the lion to the tree whilst the hunters went to get a wagon to carry him away. The lion roared and he roared so loud that the ground shook and the little mouse heard him. The mouse ran towards the lion and saw that he was tied with ropes. He looked at the lion and saw 'Be quiet and I'll set you free,' as he began to taking down the ropes. He worked long and hard and finally the lion was set free._** ** _He worked long and hard and at last the lion was free._ _The lion turned to the mouse and said, 'I was foolish to ridicule you for being small. You helped me by saving my life after all!'_** Harvey said turning the lamp off by her side.

"How is it that the mouse took the ropes off quicker than the hunters came back?" Murph asked.

"That's not the point of the story." Harvey said.

"And what is the point of the story?" Murph asked curiously.

"I guess the point was that something you gotta return a favor when someone's chosen to show you kindness ever when they first don't appreciate you." Harvey said running a hand through his hair.

"Is that why you came here? To make it up with mom?" Murph asked looking him in the eye.

"Maybe." Harvey said.

"Can I ask you one more question?" Murph asked.

"Sure." Harvey said looking down at her.

"Why'd you name me after something bad?" Murph asked.

"What'd you mean?" Harvey asked.

" **Murphy's law**." Murph said sadly.

"Murphy's law doesn't mean that if something bad can happen then it will happen. It means that if something can happen then it'll happen. Go to sleep Murph, the faster you'll sleep the quicker you'll see your mom."Harvey said kissing her on her forehead as she turned her back to him and held Rocket falling asleep.

He walked out of the room slowly and quietly shut her door as he stared at it. He turned around and saw Patrick leaning against the stairs behind him as they awkwardly stared at each other.

"I got you something a few days ago. It's by your door, I don't think it'd be useful know because you're not 10 years old like I thought you were." Harvey said nodding and walked downstairs.

Patrick waited until Harvey walked all the way downstairs as Patrick walked towards his room and saw a large square box wrapped with a bow on top. He took the box to his room as he placed the box on his table. He sat on his chair and tore the wrapping and he saw a Star Wars lego set in front of him. He smiled to himself and tried to fight the tears that were threatening to form.

* * *

"Would you like some tea, Harvey?" Mary called from the kitchen as Harvey adjusted to his room.

He got up and walked to the kitchen as Mary handed her a mug of English tea and took a sip of it. "Thank you. You still remember how I take my tea?"

"It's how Donna take hers." Mary said smiling at the thought and taking a sip of her tea.

"I don't know whether I should ask you this but Stephen…" Harvey said pausing at the thought.

"What about him?" Mary asked.

"Are he and Donna…"

"Together?" Mary asked as Harvey nodded. "Not officially, no. It's sorta like a boyfriend and girlfriend thing but more complicated and non-official. They're together a lot, they kiss but she's more cautious. Maybe because she was still married to you. To be fair I pushed her for divorce if she was going to be Stephen but she seemed to reject the notion every time I bought it up. Stephen on the other hand is in love with Donna. You can tell by the way he talks to her, looks at her. I know because it's how I looked at James and how you looked at Donna." Mary said taking a long sip of her tea.

"Does she say she loves him?" Harvey asked placing his mug on the kitchen counter looking at her.

"She says she does." Mary said as Harvey's felt his face fall as he slumped.

"If she's happy...then she deserves it. As long as he gives her everything I couldn't."

"She doesn't love him like she loved you. She's trying to find love with a lonely heart and it's easy to confuse love with someone's company. You know he lived with them while Murph was a baby?" Mary asked.

"He did?" Harvey asked looking up from the floor at her face.

"Donna couldn't do it on her own, He moved out and agreed to raise them as his own." Mary said sighing and looking at her mug and waving it a little.

"Sounds like he's been important for them."

"He has. He's stepped in for you." Mary said setting her mug on the sink.

Harvey walked towards the kitchen door and shut the kitchen door so that no one else could hear what they were about to talk about. "I'm sorry Mary, I respect you for raising a great person like Donna but none of you gave me chance to raise Murph or Patrick. Someone had to step in because she ran away and asked James to hide all of you from me. You wouldn't let me step in and you punished me for it. All 11 years of it. I haven't had a single night's sleep ever since and every meal tastes less satisfying than the last. I didn't want anything else but to grow old with her. I didn't want to clueless to the fact that I had a daughter no one gave me the slightest clue about? I wanted to be there for her first birth, her first day at school, her first soccer game, the first time she cried, the first time she fell asleep, her first birthday, Christmases and holidays. You really think I wanted my son to look at me as if he was a priest and I was the devil standing in front of him? That I wanted another man to step in for me? I just wanted to have my family back." Harvey said as a tear fell from his eye.

"Harvey—" whispered Mary apologetically.

"I know your family hates me like I'm public enemy number 1 but I've lost respect from everyone. My whole life changed when she left me even my work life. There isn't a day in those 11 years that's gone by where I haven't regretted to what I've done with your daughter. You've forced me to live in a cage that broken me."

Mary walked towards him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry for seeming like it's all your fault. I'm just as upset with Donna for being so hard headed about it. Now I know how you felt when you tried to find us and you cried like she was dead. Truth be told it's more her fault as it was yours. I know you didn't leave her and Patrick for your job and I know that given the chance to do-over differently."

His met her eyes and let the water overflow. "Now I love Stephen, dearly. And I'm appreciate everything he's been and has done for us. He feels like he would be good for her but I'll always believe that you and Donna were meant to die old together." Mary said as they heard Patrick get out of his room.

He smiled and wiped at his face, "Thank you. That means a lot."

"The only thing that matters is her being okay."

Mary walked out of the kitchen and walked towards Patrick. "Patrick, I made some tea. It's in the kitchen if you want some."

"I'll have a cup, thanks." Patrick said as Harvey walked towards the sink and washed his face.

"Is Murph asleep?" Mary asked.

"Yeah. Is there anything else you'd like before I go to sleep?" Patrick asked.

"Oh no, I'm fine. Goodnight, Sweetie." Mary said kissing her grandson on the cheek.

* * *

Everyone went back at the hospital after breakfast with Patrick and Murph watching Donna's TV and Mary, James and Stephen waiting for their lawyer.

"Where's Harvey Specter?"

Murph and Patrick looked up to see an older man with faint white hairs appearing in his slick backed black hair. His wrinkles started to show. Harvey walked towards Murph and saw the man as the man smiled back.

"Is he going to hurt us Uncle Harvey?" Murph asked concerned.

"No he's just an old familiar face." Harvey said.

"I'm not that old Specter." Travis said smirking and shaking Harvey's hand.

"Old enough to have white hair apparently." Harvey said smirking back.

"It's all in the genes. My dad had white hair at this age and so did his dad. At least I'm not going to go bold like someone here." Travis said raising his eyebrow.

"My hair isn't thinning." Harvey asked rolling his eyes as they walked to the waiting room.

"You can deny that all you want but I've got the number of someone who does great hairline restoration. He also did Wayne Rooney's, Ricky Ponting's, Nicolas Cage-"

"Nicolas Cage had a hair transplant?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Of course he did. It was all over the news." Travis said sitting down next to Harvey and taking out his laptop from his satchel.

"So tell me Travis. How long as it been since we last spoke?" Harvey asked as Travis waited for his laptop to load.

"I'd say about five years." Travis said.

"I guess time flies when you kick people's ass." Harvey said leaning back.

"I hope you don't mean that literally." Travis said turning his head to look at him.

"I also mean it symbolically." Harvey said looking at him as Stephen, Mary and James listened to their banter.

"You know last time we boxed I kicked you ass." Travis said smiling.

"Clearly you watched a different fight." Harvey said defending himself.

"Nope, I still have the judges scorecard at home." Travis said putting his laptop password on and connecting to the internet.

"You got any proof besides a scorecard. Anyone can make up their own scorecard." Harvey said shrugging.

"Only because you wanted it private. You suck for someone who was an amateur." Travis said loading some files.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence Tanner." Harvey said rolling his eyes.

"You know I haven't come close any lawyer as lethal as you, right?" Travis asked looking at him.

"I don't where this flattery is going but carry on."

"You had courage to do what no one did, the unpleasant thing...the necessary thing. You'd kill a case before it mutated into something harsh which I respect you for." Travis said as they began to talk seriously.

"What is it that you want from me Travis. It's clearly not about my situation." Harvey said looking at the waiting room and back at Harvey.

"Here is something you should read in time." Travis said taking out documents from his satchel and placing it on his lap.

"Why should I take my time in reading this?" Harvey said looking at the 100 page document.

"The time's not for reading, it's for thinking." Travis said pointing to it.

"You want me to contemplate about this? This isn't English Literature Travis." Harvey said taking out his bag and placing it inside.

"I didn't give you to give you a book, I've come here you to give you a bible." Travis said emphasizing on the word bible.

"What are you selling me? A way of life?" Harvey asked turning to look at him.

"That's your future in there Mr Specter." Travis said confidently.

"Unless you've become a crazy psychic, I'm not buying what you're selling to me." Harvey said placing the bag on the floor.

"Is it true that you and Jessica had an argument that almost got you fired?" Travis asked.

"That is none of your god damn business." Harvey replied with venom.

"So the rumours really do bear some truth. What did the both of you argue about? You two are like mother and son and they never argue unless it was bad." Travis said leaning towards him.

"I pitched an idea that she dismissed. She made me a promise, more like an oath when I backed her up under pressure. She told me that circumstances changed." Harvey said so that only the both of them could hear it as people walked passed them.

"I bet you had a nasty argument."

"It was a massive disaster Travis. I bet that gives you comfort knowing that." Harvey said looking at him disgusted.

"No it improves my position." Travis said placing the laptop on the floor for a moment. "I want to go into business with you."

"You'll have to take your business to her." Harvey said referring to Jessica.

"I don't want to have business with your firm. I want an investment in you Harvey." Travis said pointing to his chest.

"You offering me a job position? I'm still loyal to Jessica you know." Harvey said taking his way away from his chest.

"Loyalty always has a price Harvey." Travis said giving his salesman smile.

"Loyalty can never be bought, it's earned."

"That price being we start our own law firm." Travis said revealing his grand idea.

"You want to start a new law firm with me?" Harvey asked in disbelief smiling a little and pointing to himself.

"I know why she really rejected you. I saw your proposal and it was great." Travis said putting the laptop on his laptop and opening the file to a PDF document showing Harvey a copy of Harvey's business proposal.

"How did you'd get that Tanner?" Harvey asked shocked as he read his proposal that he hasn't read for years.

"A little birdie sent me a copy." Travis said closing the document.

"It doesn't matter because I'm rejecting your job offer." Harvey asked.

"You haven't heard everything about it. I want you to run our law firm Harvey. Your rules, your staff and your ideas fully acknowledged." Travis said giving him a guarantee.

"So you're taking a version idea and you're using it to get me to work with you?" Harvey asked trying to make sense of what he was saying.

"I'm not giving your a version. I'm giving you a vision Harvey. A vision fully back financially by myself and yourself and by a third party who's willing to back us up financially." Travis said.

"What's the catch Tanner? Who's your third party because the last time I met with someone who was backing a lawyer he was in jail. What do you get out of all this?" Harvey asked with questions running through his head.

"No catch. I get a business here in New York and 45% of shares and profits. As for the third party he'll remain a third party. I can guarantee you that he's just someone who wants to get into the lawyer game. He has no affiliation with you or myself. That's my guarantee." Travis said holding his hands up.

"What if-"

"I'm sorry I got to take this." Travis said picking up the phone and smiling.

"Hello. Hey Eve, how are you kiddo? Daddy's just on a business trip here. I'm in London you know where the queen lives?...I promise to be home on time. Don't tell you mom this but I've got you a present...I can't tell you it's a surprise sweetie. I also got something for Mommy too but don't tell her, okay? I promise to be home before you wake up. Bye Evelyn, bye." Travis cutting the call.

"I didn't know you settled down Travis." Harvey said looking at him.

"I didn't know you were married, had kids and were separated...How many kids?" Travis asked humbly.

"One boy, one girl. You just saw them." Harvey said pointing inside.

"I heard about what happened to Donna too. I can't imagine-"

"I couldn't too." Harvey said looking down and running a hand through his face.

"Here we are. Two people..once enemies now lost in translation." Travis said looking at Harvey sadly and then back at his laptop screen. "Let's talk about Donna's situation."

"What's going on with her situation?" Harvey asked quickly looking at her

"I'm sorry Harvey but you can't make a decision on her behalf." Travis said handing her the bad news. "Those forms are outdated."

Harvey took opened his back and took out a copy of the document and handed it to him highlighting a paragraph showing him that they gave each other durable power of attorney. "

Travis sighed, "Harvey... Donna revoked all such powers after you separated and drew up a living will in its place. I shouldn't even be showing you there papers now that your name's been removed from the beneficiary list." He said handing her a copy of his own document. "Her wishes say that she doesn't want to be kept alive on life support longer than six month. I have to make sure he wishes are fulfilled."

"No, she wouldn't do this." Harvey said in disbelief.

"She wrote it up handwritten and had me look over and then notarize it. Her witnesses were James Paulsen and Mary Ann Cardellini. Everything she owns goes to the kids and her parents will full custody. If James and Mary can't do it then Stephen's named their legal guardians. And next in line is Mike and Rachel Ross."

"But I'm their father. What the fuck Travis." Harvey said in shock.

"I'm going by Donna's requests." Travis said showing pointing to the document.

"You can't let them unplug her…"

"I know how hard it is but you have to think of Donna. It's not fair to her to her in a coma just because you don't want to say goodbye. She can't be like this forever"

Harvey heard Mary's sob and he tried to improvise. "There isn't a petition we can file? Can't you get us another month to figure something out?"

"She's **_had_ ** a long time. If there were some progress we could add a few weeks but Donna simply doesn't have the stats to do so." Travis said running a hand through his hair."The most I can do for you is look into the custody rights. She didn't file for full custody so it was never granted. You should still have joint and control over where Patrick and Murph go."


	18. The Reappearance of Donna Paulsen

Mary broke.

She couldn't hold it in any longer. She sobbed and covered her face with her hands as he slumped sideways to cling to Donna's waist. James knelt beside his wife and rubbed her back but it didn't stop Murph's attention from falling towards them. The doctor's told everyone that they were going to unplug the machine if there were no progress but Murph was in New York so at first she was confused until a sudden hit of realisation forced her to shoot to her feet.

She turned and look at Harvey desperately. "You couldn't fix it, could you? Mommy's never gonna wake up?"

"Murph," Mary said wiping her tears away and looking at her granddaughter. "Darling, I'm so sorry—"

"I couldn't fix it with _that_ method but I'm not giving up." Harvey said as Murph ran towards him as he extended his hands and picked her up as she placed her hands around his neck and burying her face into his neck. "I'm not gonna let go of mommy because I'm going to find another way. I promise." He whispered. "I'll find another way. I always do Murph. Your mom's going to wake up, I promise."

Harvey set Murph onto the floor as he turned his head towards Patrick. "Patrick...Why don't the two of you grab a snack?"

"We just had breakfast." Patrick stated confused.

"Go to the gift shop, then." Harvey said taking out his wallet and handing them bills.

"Maybe I want to stay here." Patrick said looking at Harvey.

"I need to speak with the adults." Harvey said as he handed Murph $50.

"I am an adult." Patrick argued standing up. "Why can't I know what's going on?"

"You can but I'm not sending Murph to the cafeteria by herself." Harvey said putting his hands on his shoulders looking down at him to get him to comply.

"Come on then." Patrick said sighing as he held his sisters hand taking her to the cafe.

"Don't make promises you can't keep because you're gonna end up hurting her if something happens." Stephen said to Harvey. "What are you gonna tell them when you can't find any loophole?" Your lawyer subtly implied she was beyond hope?"

"Do you want her to wake up or not?" Harvey asked as Stephen felt his face drop and a tear fall down his face as he wiped his eyes.

"Do you have an idea?" Stephen asked.

"No...I...I just need to get out of here to clear my mind." Harvey said walking away from them as Stephen shook his head in disappointment.

Once Harvey was out of the hospital he took out his phone and went through his contact list and found Benjamin's name. He paused over the number before he called it and placed the phone on his ear.

"Harvey?"

"Yeah it's me." Harvey said waiting for his reply.

"What the hell are you doing in England?" Benjamin asked curiously.

"How'd you know I was-"

"You really going to ask a tech wizard how he knows he's getting a call from England?" Benjamin asked challenging hi.

"I need his address." Harvey said as there was a pause between both men.

"I thought-"

"I need it now." Harvey said cutting off his sentence.

"You better have a pen and paper ready." Benjamin said as Harvey heard the tapping of his keyboard.

* * *

"We're here." The taxi driver said as they stopped outside the church.

"Thanks. Sorry about the currency difference." Harvey said handing him $20.

"That's about £15 so it's more than enough for the ride. Thank you and good luck with your prayers. I'm sure they'll be answered." The taxi driver said taking the $20 as Harvey nodded and opened the door.

The taxi drove off as Harvey put his hands in his pockets staring at the church in front of him. It'd been years since he last visited a church so he was nervous when he walked in. He opened the door and smelled the wood that hit him as he saw the cross in front of him. In the front row he saw the priest bowing his head down and reading a prayer in his head.

Harvey walked towards the priest and his steps echoed throughout the church. He sat on the bench behind the church and looked at his curly white hair that were once grey.

"I didn't expect you here Harvey." A familiar voice said.

"I didn't expect you to be a priest either Hardman." Harvey said as Daniel turned around now with his beard fully covered in white and wrinkles threatening to form.

"I'd tell you how I ended up here but I don't think you'd be interested in my story since you were a part of it a few years ago." Daniel said sighing.

"I wanna know the part I wasn't in so go on Daniel. The floor is yours." Harvey said as Daniel turned to leaned his body against the bench looking at Harvey.

"When I came here I had nothing. I thought I had enough money to survive but then the IRS came here and they took everything I own. I had no clothes, no food, no house and I had to live on the side of the alleyway. That was until an angel in the form of a priest took me in. He gave me a place to live in here, he gave me a job to clean and take care of the church and I started to read the bible and all the answers to my problems were in front of me. I had to repent all my sins and Jesus was going to come and save my soul. I guess you could say I always believed it was the things you don't choose that makes you who you are. Your city, your neighborhood, your family. People here take pride in these things, like it was something they'd accomplished. The bodies around their souls, the cities wrapped around those which was then when I realised that life can be hard. I asked Father Cooper how I could get to heaven and still protect myself from all the evil in the world. He told me what God said to His children. **_"You are sheep among wolves. Be wise as serpents, yet innocent as doves."_** And that stuck with me forever because I might have been as wise as a serpent but I was a guilty as the devil himself and that changed my life forever. After settling in a few years at the church and helping Father Cooper with the Sunday prayers I had a business opportunity and with the help of Father Cooper we realised we ended up being extremely rich. You want to guess how?" Daniel asked.

"It's your story. I just want to know the details.." Harvey said listening to him.

"Oil. I'm an oil man now I guess. On our visit to Botswana where we have an association with the church there we struck oil. One barrel of oil turned into hundreds across this one giant field in Botswana. Then we hired the people in the local villages and we would pay them to help distribute the oil. It was fantastic. They got their families together and we set up tents and as the money started to come in we realised that instead of taking the money like I would have, we helped the children by hiring teachers to educate the children by building a school since education is a necessity. These children are our future to which we all should strive for. Then something else hit me during that visit. I saw the way they were eating in their homes and when I gave them a loaf of break they ate it with luxury and that to me is an abomination. That a child should look at a piece of bread that we're lucky to have anytime we want. And then we dug water wells. Water wells meants irrigation which meant cultivation so that these kids could have a fresh supply of water whenever required and they could eat real food. They were going so much grain that wouldn't know what to do with it. Agriculture, education, constant food supply...we just helped that community survive. It will flourish and it was all done in the name of God. I repented for my sins and he blessed me with wealth and I returned the favour by helping that community because I wanted them to know what I felt when God saved me. I had to remain an innocent as a dove and I felt like I did as God asked." Daniel said nodding his head.

"Now I remember why I used to call you a great storyteller." Harvey said smiling.

"It's just in my nature I guess but I'm pretty sure you never came here to catch up with my life so I need an answer to why you're here. You're not the forgiving type." Daniel said getting up to sit next to him.

"I need help." Harvey said sighing.

"From me or from God?" Daniel asked curiously.

"Anyone who's listening. It's Donna...she's been in a-"

"Car accident?" Daniel asked as Harvey looked at him. "I saw it on the news. Surprised me at first that she was here which made me think that something had gone wrong between the both of you." Harvey said.

"I guess you could say that. We got married...still married actually and we've got two kids." Harvey said smiling.

"How old are they?"

"19 and 11. Did you visit her?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Yes, I did. But no one from her family knew who I was. They just saw a priest who wanted to offer their prayers as help. I remember bumping into your son and for a moment I thought I saw you but then I smiled and walked away knowing he'd grow up to be like you. He has your looks but his mother's personality." Daniel said running a hair through his hair. "I'm guessing you know her current condition."

"I do." Harvey said sadly.

"It was much worse when I saw her. I didn't have to go but I never hated her. I admired her character and her loyalty to you. I mean it was a matter of time before the both of you ended up together but I think it's a shame when two people who deserve to be with each other end up leaving for the wrong reasons." Daniel said as Harvey looked down onto the floor.

"Which is why I want you to help her." Harvey said looking up to face him. "Find a way, anyway."

"God works in mysterious ways. Sometimes they take away everything we adore because he wants to test us. He wants us to wake up to the small things we never appreciated." Daniel said looking at Jesus on the cross.

"Why would God make us go through this pain if he wants us to still believe in us? I feel like I've been reduced to a single entity." Harvey asked.

"I told you before. God works in ways we can't imagine because if we did then we'd change the way we live. The only thing you can do is hope and pray to God. If you want my advice then take a room with her alone and confess everything to her. Maybe, just maybe she'll wake up but I can't guarantee that because it's all up to God's hands. But I want to give you some advice that you'll listen to." Daniel said looking at him.

"What is it?" Harvey asked curiously.

"When you beat me, you didn't just beat me…you destroyed my whole life. I lost the one thing I was always good at which was being a lawyer and outsmarting people but the truth is that I just wanted to be loved. I wanted to be loved because I was great; A big man. But look at me now. I'm nothing. Look at the glory around us; trees, birds. I lived in shame. I dishonored it all, and didn't notice the glory. I'm a foolish man. But I learned from my mistake so what I'm about to tell you will make me sound foolish but even foolish men can become wise. You will love Harvey, whether you like it or not. Emotions, they come and go like clouds. Love is not only a feeling; you will love. To love is to run the risk of failure, the risk of betrayal. You fear your love has died? Then perhaps it is waiting to be transformed into something higher. You need to awaken the divine presence which sleeps in you. Know each other in that love that never changes. So love her again and you'll get her back."

* * *

"James can I speak with you for a second?" Harvey asked looking down at James.

James looked up at Harvey and turned his head to his wife who nodded as he got up and walked outside of the room in a separate room.

"What do you want?" James asked.

"I need the room alone with Donna." Harvey asked looking at him.

"Why?" James asked confused.

"I need to speak to Donna." Harvey said looking at him desperately.

"I can't let you do that." James said as he Harvey leaned against the wall.

"Please. I can't go in there without your blessing." Harvey said.

"You remember the last time I gave you my blessing?" James asked looking at him crossing his eyebrows.

"Yeah." Harvey said croaking.

"And look where that led too. You ruined her life and broke her heart. When she ran back to us she was sad, hurt, dying, alone, lonely, suicidal and she was in pain."

"I know what I've done but-"

"No but you don't know what you've done. She wanted to kill herself." James said sitting down on a chair shocking Harvey. "When she came back to us she was good for a while. Told us that she came to visit us. She'd talk a lot and laugh more. Slept like a baby and ate normally. But then something happened like a switch suddenly turned off and she was left alone with darkness in her mind. She felt like her whole world was sinking deeper and deeper and she became scared that she'll never become the person she was. I saw her slit her wrists Harvey. She didn't want to live anyone and I had to take her to the hospital. She went through therapy for so many years but she reliased that she didn't need to sit around a circle and tell her story to people so that they could feel sorry for her because her kids were her therapy. So that's what you did to my little girl. You broke her and you almost took her away from me." James said putting his hand to his face and sobbing as Harvey walked towards him and placed an arm around the older man's body.

"I'm sorry James. I'm as scared too because she means more to me than any other person. I'm sorry for hurting her, hurting you and for any other reason you're angry at me. I know what I'm saying doesn't mean anything to you but that's why I'm here. I have to make it up to her, that's why I need to speak with your daughter. I have to make things right because she will survive. I won't fall into despair because I'll keep on fighting until she wakes up." Harvey whispered as James began to nod his head.

"You know what still scared me the most after she settled down with us and was as far away from you as possible?" James asked looking at Harvey who was waiting for an answer.

"No." Harvey simply replied.

"It's scary after how much you put her through she still talked about you... **like you put the stars in the sky.** " James said as his voice shook. "So what are you waiting for? Go wake up my daughter." James said as they broke their hug looking at each other in admiration.

"Thank you sir." Harvey said as James nodded his head and began to walk away. He watched how Patrick emerged from the corner of the door and stormed towards him.

"Don't you dare try and go in there." Patrick said raising his voice.

"Patrick-"

"You don't understand what you've put us through. You weren't there for mom for the past 12 years why should you be put in the same room with her-"

"Of course I deserve to be in a room with her because I've been a slave for 12 years!" Harvey said matching the volume of his voice. "I was a free man until your mother left me with you. I am not a slave!"

"You deserve to be one after what you've done. You don't know what she's been through and now you're gonna try and make it worse when she hears the bullshit you're going to spill. You don't know what it was like seeing her cry herself to sleep every night and convincing Murph that she's pretending to cry or she's watching a movie. You don't know what it's like growing up without a father for 12 years. You weren't there when Murph was born. You weren't there when me and Murph had our first fight. You weren't there when I fell in love." Patrick said pausing as he felt himself choke as he clenched his fists in anger. "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LOSE A CHILD!"

"OF COURSE I KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LOSE A CHILD!" Harvey screamed at Patrick as Patrick felt his heart beat in shock.

"W-w-what?" Patrick asked in a timidly shaking his head in confusion.

Harvey sighed to himself as he pinched his cheek and rubbed his face downwards. "Murph come inside." Harvey said looking behind the door seeing Murph emerging from the side of the door looking embarrassed.

"How many times have I told you not to do that." Patrick said looking back at Murph as she walked into the room.

"You lost a baby?" Murph asked looking up at Harvey.

"His name was Casey. He was younger than Patrick actually. I'm not surprised you don't remember because you were only one when he was born. Your mother loved him and so did you. He died of meningitis. He was only a month old and it destroyed the both of us. I remember seeing your mother hold his **dead body** in her arms and she let herself go. She had no sense of **time** around her because she was stuck reliving his death but what no one knows is how I had to carry on living my life as if **nothing** had happened. Everyone feels sorry for the mother but what they don't know what that I lost a child too that day." Harvey said with his eyes slowly filling up with tears. "I didn't like carrying on with my life because I had to **pretend** he never existed as if the last 9 months of my life never existed so don't you FUCKING dare tell me I don't know what it's like to **lose a child** and I don't give a shit if you hate me because I didn't just lose Casey but I also lost **you and Murph**. Now that you know that I know what it's like to lose a child how about I ask you if you know what it's like having a baby you didn't know **existed**! Your mother never told me about Murph and I deserved to know about her. I mean it turns out that she actually wrote me a letter but she never sent it to me so I don't CARE if you think I'm an asshole but don't you dare **accuse me** of not being able to feel. The past 12 years have been nothing but **emotional fucking pain** and I deserve to have a good night's fucking rest for once. I'm sorry for not being there when you were younger but I hope you're sorry on behalf of your mother for abandoning me, taking you away from me and keeping her a secret! So don't you dare give me a lecture about what I don't know what it's like to feel pain because I did my suffering…all of it!" Harvey said as both of the children stared at him in shock.

He got onto his knees slowly and placed his hands on top of Murph's shoulders.

"What makes you think mommy will wake up?" Murph asked looking down at his father with sad eyes.

"Because she's my wife and no matter what happened we still love each so much that word is too weak of a word to describe it." Harvey whispered placing holding her hand. "You gonna trust me on this one Grootie. Do you trust me?"

She nodded.

"Just trust me one last time."

* * *

"Everyone get out." James said as they all looked at him confused.

"What do you mean?" Stephen asked confused.

"I need Harvey to speak with her alone." James said running a hand through his hair.

"You sure about this because-"

"Stephen I've made up my mind." James said as Stephen conceded as he walked out of the room first with Mary and James following her.

"What you gonna say to her?" Patrick asked holding Murph's hand.

Harvey turned back to look at the both of them. "I'm gonna try and make things right with her."

"I'm sorry dad. I shouldn't have been a dick to you." Patrick whispered.

"Don't be sorry for how you felt over 12 years. It's only natural to be angry over someone who was never there for you. I should be the one saying sorry because I don't deserve to be your father." Harvey said nodding his head as Patrick closed the door to the room leaving Harvey alone with Donna.

* * *

 _ **SOUNDTRACK: THE PLACE BEYOND THE PINES - SNOW ANGEL**_

Once the whole family were out and the door shut Harvey gulped as he separated the curtain and walked towards Donna's bed staring at her again. The machine echoed the room as she peacefully took her breaths looking like an angel.

Harvey pulled up a chair and sat next to her holding her hand remembered how she felt like when her hands intertwined with her. He took out a box from his pocket and opened it taking out her ring as he placed it on her ring finger.

"You know you should have kept your ring because I kept mine. I have mine on my finger now, never took it off because it felt more like an honor that I got married to the most perfect woman in the world. You made me feel like the only one in the world whenever you'd touch my face but what's even more scary was how I fell in love with the way you touched me without using your hands." Harvey whispered as he put his hand on her wrist and dragged her fingers down his face.

"I haven't had a single night's sleep but I feel so tired. I remember the last time when you sat on our bed; it was when you told me goodbye. I remember the tears streaming down my face because I realised I lost something I couldn't replace. I tried to fix us but we were beyond repair as I wished we lived in a time where we didn't just throw away something that was broken but we tried to fix it together." Harvey said as he watched her face. "You remember when we went for karaoke and I took you to the alleyway and showed you the sugar snowstorm? I remember that moment every day we had out first proper kiss as lovers because before we were just friends that spoke like lovers and that was enough for 12 years but that kiss showed we weren't scared to love one another." He whispered looking at her and lying down next to her with her head resting against her neck and his hand resting against her stomach.

"I want to hold your hand again whenever we walk along the side walk knowing we have someone to lean on. I want to be by your side as you catch me watching other woman and I'd come up with excuses like _'thank god you don't dress like that'_. I want to hug you whenever you're feeling sad or wake up from a nightmare so I can hear your heartbeat against me chest slowing down knowing I can make you feel safe. I want to snuggle up with you on the couch on a rainy Sunday evening watching Love Actually and talk about why it's actually creepy. But the one I want to do desperately is...I want to kiss your lips again...every single day. I want to make love to you whenever I stare at you and realise how lucky I am to be with you and show you how much I love you because to feel your lips against mine would be enough for me to die right now. I want the world to be there when I close my eyes and open them to see you sleeping next to me because when you left me and I'd wake up the world just disappeared and I was in pain everyday and it changed me because I didn't get stronger and it made me worse because I was all alone. I want us to hug our kids again as they grow up to have kids of their own and we'll watch what we made. If it's a confession you want then yes, I started to leave you because I couldn't handle the fact that Casey died. It made me realise there was no such thing as a fairy tale ending and I thought that maybe if I start to come to the house less often then it's be the same as riding as lighting. But I learned that if you ride like lighting then you're gonna crash like thunder." Harvey whispered as he stood up to lean his forehead against hers as a tear dropped down to her cheek.

He wiped the tear off her cheek and his thumb grazed her lips as the hairs on his body stood out. He leaned his lips towards her and kissed them smelling her trademark vanilla and cinnamon scent. "Now'd be a great time to wake up."

He took his lips away from hers and there was still no reaction. "I'm gonna leave now Donna. Don't make me leave Donna. I know we were meant to lose the people we love because how else would we know how important they are to us but not like this. I can't lose you like this." Harvey said taking a step towards the door.

"Make me stay Donna because the worst feeling in the world is knowing you did the best that you could, and it still wasn't good enough so please make me stay Donna." Harvey whispered as another tear fell down his eye as he took another step away from her.

"Make me stay Donna." Harvey said mumbling as he felt tears flowing down his eyes. "Don't make me leave Donna!"

Harvey's hand was now on the door as his face hit the door. "Don't make me leave Donna!" He said loudly sobbing. hitting the door and falling onto the floor.

"Don't make me leave!" Harvey said as leaned against the door to stare at her one more time before he opened the door and ran towards the bathroom.

Everyone saw Harvey run towards the bathroom in emotional pain as Patrick ran into the room to his mother.

"No." Patrick cried into her stomach and grabbing the blanket in his fist. "Mommy please wake up."

"Why are you crying Patrick?"

Patrick lifted his head and smiled. "Momma?"

Donna managed to smile slowly as a tear ran down her face.


	19. Blind

"She's awake!" Patrick shouted running out of the room. The family looked up at him confused as he continued running towards them. "Mom's awake!"

Mary grasped at her chest as did James, Stephen felt a little emotional but Murph's face was lighting up the more she began to believe.

The little girl pushed past him and almost colliding into nurses but not caring as she ran into the room. "Mommy! Mommy!"

She snuggled up to Donna and stuck her head under the woman's chin. "There's my baby Murph..."

She comforted her daughter by moving her head and caressing her temple. James and Mary ambled in in tears walked into the room with Stephen as they embraced Donna. "Where's Patrick?"

"He's getting Daddy..."

"Daddy? Who are you calling, _Daddy?_ " Donna asked looking at Stephen as Murph moved her mouth towards her mother's ears.

" _My Daddy_. Harvey Specter." Murph whispered.

Donna's face turned pale.

Murph hugged Donna's waist with a blissful smile, so glad to hear the woman's voice again. "He's getting Daddy..."

"He's _here_?" Donna asked with her voice shaking. Murph nodded as Dna's face turned into horror then to anger faster than a cheetah could run after it's prey. "What is he doing here? What did you do?"

"We didn't do anything, Donna." James said kneeling beside Donna's bed. "We didn't even know Murph found him and—"

" _Murph_ found him _?_ " Donna asked looking at her daughter who looked confused.

"When I went to my soccer camp, I pretended to be Marcus's daughter asked him to take care of me when I was there." Murph said putting her head down in shame.

"So you lied to me?" Donna asked as Murph moved her head up to face her.

"I'm sorry!" Murph whispered as she bit her lip. "I missed you. And if I couldn't have my Mommy, I wanted Daddy. I wanted my _real_ Daddy and he didn't know who I was anyway."

"But he knows now...?"

"He knows everything." Mary said as Donna's body tensed.

"We're having a long talk about this later." Donna said looking at Murph.

"Are you upset with me?" Murph asked sadly.

"I'm not Murph. I get why you did it but I don't like the situation you've put me in. Could everyone leave? I need to speak with Stephen privately." Donna said as everyone nodded walking around Stephen as they waited for the door to close.

"I trusted you," Donna said with anger. "You told me you'd protect them if anything happened to me ."

"I did." Stephen said sitting next to her.

"You sent her to New York ALONE! Donna said emphasizing the last word.

"I made sure she had a legitimate dorm at the camp," Stephen said. "She called us everyday and let us know that everything was alright. How was I supposed to know she'd found out about Harvey, let alone hunt him down?"

"You should've kept better track of her." Donna said barely able to lift her hand up to run her head.

"I did my best!" Stephen said frustrated. "You have no idea how utterly overwhelmed I was when you woke up."

* * *

"Dad?" Patrick called entering the toilet.

He walked in to see Harvey lying down against the wall, his tie off, shirt untucked, buttons undone, his posture slumped almost causing his to slide down the wall.

"I'm so sorry." Harvey said looking at Patrick. "I tried my best and she won't wake up. I mean is there any-"

"But she's awake." Patrick said smiling as Harvey's eyes opened wider.

"Are you-"

"I'm not lying." Patrick said walking towards his father and giving his hand. Harvey took his hand and helped himself up as both of them looked at each other before they found themselves placing their arms around each other in a hug that started to loosen themselves.

* * *

When it was time to go Murph cried and clung to Donna as it broke Donna's heart. "No! Mommy please let me stay!"

"Baby, we both need to rest." Donna whispered cleaning Murph's tears.

"But the bed is big enough for the three of us." Murph said putting her face in her face.

"It'll be hard for us to sleep baby." Donna whispered.

"I'll sleep on the chair then or on the floor." Murph said as Mary took her shoulder and picked her up as Murph gave up and looked at her mother.

"We'll be back tomorrow. I promise mommy." Murph said.

"Keep your promise baby and I'll be here too. Go home and rest for me." Donna said as Murph got off Mary and her mother kissed her cheeks and one on her head.

"Sweet dreams. I love you." Murph said.

"I love you too," Donna smiled blowing the girl kisses

Patrick swung his backpack on his shoulder and kissed his mother's cheeks, "Love you."

"I love you two." Donna said kissing his cheek back. "Make sure Murph gets some rest as do you. You don't have to worry anymore."

"I'll try not too." Patrick smiled back and walking towards Murph as they headed towards the elevator.

"Let me talk to your mother for one second. Grandpa James is at the end of the hallway." Mary said smiling as they walked towards their grandad.

Mary shut the door and Donna managed to get up slowly and crossed her arms. "I'm not ready mom."

"He's been sitting against the wall here all day. He hasn't sat down a chair since you got up and hasn't moved or eaten." Mary said scolding her and putting her hand on her hips.

"That's his fault for sitting there all day. He could have walked in but he didn't."

"Because he refused to come in unless it's on your terms." Mary said.

"Tough luck because I'm not calling him in." Donna said as Mary looked at her critically.

"Mom you don't understand. I never thought I'd see him again and I'm not ready to answer all his questions. Eleven years worth of questions I don't think I'm strong enough to even look him in the eye and talk about the past or the future." Donna said as he head fell back to the headboard.

"He'll be here for seven minutes max because of visitation hours." Mary said trying to get her to talk to him.

"Send him in." Donna said huffing.

* * *

Harvey walked against the door and paused as he stared at the doorknob. He managed to garner the strength to put his hand on the doorknob and twisted it as he slowly entered the room not looking at her and closed it. He looked at the reflection on the door mirror and saw her staring at him as he turned his face around to face her.

He could tell she felt uncomfortable as her face stayed transfixed on him as he walked towards the foot of the bed and grabbed a chair and dragged it across the floor and placed it at the side of her bed. He sat down and looked at her face as they took a moment to stare at each other as he tried to touch her soul with his eyes.

"Hey Bella." Harvey whispered as Donna felt goosebumps all over her body.

"Hey." Donna whispered back. "Are you staying...where are you...?"

"Guest room," Harvey said looking at her. "I hope that's alright. Your mom insisted. If you don't want me to stay then I could-"

"No that's okay. How long are you planning to be here?" Donna asked as Harvey took a deep breath.

"Until the doctor's says its fine to discharge you. I wanted to help with the kids, money, anything I could." Harvey said putting his hand in his pocket.

"Oh. Thank you. That's...that's kind of you." Donna said still not looking at him.

"I—If there's anything else I can do..."

"No, I'm fine." Donna said as she sent a glance at him that turned him to the edge.

"Please ask me to do something for you. Please Donna, just ask me to do anything." Harvey begged desperately as his eyes blinked wildly.

"I know the kids will want to visit a lot. Can you make sure they have some fun in what's left of their summer?" Donna asked politely as Harvey nodded his head.

"Yeah, sure, of course I'd be happy too." Harvey said as she looked at him.

"Thank you," Donna said trying to smile but too weak as she reached her hand to grab the glass of water from the tray.

"Let me get that." Harvey asked reaching forward as he paused.

Their fingers brushed and as the both of them looked at each other. Their fingers felt weak as the glass smashed to the floor slipping through their fingers.

"I'm sorry, I—"

"The nurses can get it." Donna said as she looked down at the broken glass and back to his eyes.

"God, I love you so much..."

"Harvey—"

"I'm not going to apologise for the truth. I never thought I'd lay my eyes on you again. I love you—"

"Harvey-"

"I think one of the saddest thing is when two people get to know each other's secrets, fears, favourite things, what they love and hate, literally everything and then they go back to being strangers. It's like we have to stare at each other when really you know everything and they're just a memory." Harvey said softly.

"I don't want to do this right now." Donna said looking down and not meeting his gaze.

"You never looked nice." Harvey said as Donna raised her head slowly confused. "You looked like art, and art isn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something and because of that in a room full of art I'd still stare at you. You are every beautiful thing that has ever happened to me wrapped in a person. You always thought you were ordinary but you're as magical as the ocean." Harvey whispered as Donna shook her head.

"Please Harvey, not tonight. You don't understand I'm gonna-"

"Since the day you left me I hear your voice in every sound and your face in every crowd and that feeling won't go away. But when I saw you sleeping like an angel I closed my eyes and they turned to stone. Because now the only thing I fear is seeing you're better off alone. And because of that I'd rather you cut out my eyes and leave me blind if that's true. We loved each other. It was supposed to be the beginning of a love which became an addiction-"

"But the same thirst for love which brought us together can also kill." Donna said interrupting him as Harvey paused. "Because one day you woke up and find out something has changed forever...and you try to keep the pieces together but you just can't get back to the way it was...suddenly our passion and longing turn into misunderstanding and despair..and you would have preferred to remain blind than living the consequences of what was supposed to be a never ending love."

"Why-why can't we just be together-"

"Because that's not how love works!" Donna said shoulder as the nurse barged inside the room staring at both of them.

"Ms Paulsen-"

"All you have to do is just say yes and-"

"I can't do that." Donna said looking down. "Please take him away."

The male nurse walked towards him as Harvey held Donna's hand. "Why not?"

"Because I'm going to marry-"

"Visiting hours are now over, Sir. I need you to head out." A nurse said grabbing Harvey by him arm and taking him out.

He couldn't get another word in.

* * *

"What happened?" Patrick asked shutting the door behind as Harvey walked past him.

"Nothing. We just spoke-"

"So something did happened." Patrick said trying to give his father to talk.

"She asked me to get you to have some fun before the summer holidays are finished." Harvey said taking off his gloves and scarf.

"And that's it?" Patrick asked.

"I tried to tell her how much I love her but visiting hours were over and she said...nevermind." Harvey said shaking her head.

"What did mom say?"

"Nothing." Harvey said placing a hand on his shoulder. "Just forget about it...Patrick."

"So what you gonna do now?" Patrick said looking at Harvey's hand on his shoulder.

"I don't know." Harvey said leaning against the wall.

"Come follow me. I have to show you something." Patrick said as Harvey followed his lead.

They entered the room which looked like lead to a garage as they walked down the stops completely blind of what room he was in. Patrick flicked the light switch on and saw a Harvey-Davidson Steet 750 in the middle of the garage.

"Is that a-"

"You bet'ya. You wanna sit on it?" Patrick asked as Harvey's starstruck face took him towards it.

His hands felt the handles as he slowly sat on it trying to keep a balance. Slowly he turned the key that was already in the bike as it roared into life. Both of them smiled as Harvey turned the handles to hear the constant roar that was coming from the bike. He then turned if off after a few minutes and got off it looking at Patrick.

"You been driving that around here?" Harvey asked smirking.

"Yeah. Only got it last year. Got a reasonable deal for it. I love it, I saved up and yeah here's the result of my hard work. I didn't need mom's money or grandpa's money either. I felt like I earned this because it was all me." Patrick said walking towards the motorbike and taking the key out.

"Why not cars?" Harvey asked.

"I know how to drive one but look at it. I just fell in love with it so I got lessons and saved up to buy one." Patrick said shrugging.

"If only I could show you my car collection." Harvey said sighing. "Luckily I've just my Aston Martin DB9 should be here tomorrow."

"Wait your Aston Martin DB9?" Patrick asked gasping.

"Impressed?" Harvey asked with a smirk.

"I'm not buying your bluff." Patrick said closing his arms.

"Fine. You'll just have to see this morning when the man asks me to sign the delivery." Harvey said walking away with his smirk in tact.

* * *

"Here's what's going to happen now father." Murph said laughing as Harvey looked down at the monopoly board in shock. "You're going to give me all your money, all your shitty rail roads, all your property, all your shopping malls and hotels...you know the ones you've been working so hard for using your investments and ripping us off and I'm going to destroy your son over there."

"But-"

"And the worst part it doesn't even cover how much you owe me." Murph said as she took Harvey's money, houses and properties. "Now you big brother, you see if you roll something less than 10 then you're going to make a fool out of yourself especially if you land a monopoly man."

"I know." Patrick said as he rolled the dice and immediately his jaw turned into shock.

"You're not the chosen sibling Patrick." Murph whispered as she took all of Patrick's money and properties. "It was me who was chosen. I did what your father told me he would do. I broke you and I beat you. And you see by paying him $1000 in cash for Boardwalk by completing my monopoly he made a mistake because luck wasn't on his side. But if was you who sold him that property to stop me from winning-"

"Murph just-"

"DRAIIINAGGGGEEEEEEEEEEEEE PATRICK! Drainage Patrick you boy! If you have a milkshake and I have a milkshake and I have straw and here it is that's the straw," Murph whispered pointing her finger and standing up as she walked backwards away from the table towards the couch. "and my straw reaches acrooooossssssssssss your straw." Murph said walking towards Patrick. "I DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE! I DRINK IT UP!"

"You know now that your meh impression of Daniel Day Lewis in There Will Be Blood is over I'm gonna just..."

"DAD!" Murph screamed as Harvey launched onto her and started to tickle her.

"Don't think I've forgetten-"

"Dad!" Patrick shouted as Harvey started to tickle him before Murph and Patrick pinned Harvey down onto the floor before the both of them looked at each other with a smirk.

"Guys what are you thinking?" Harvey asked worryingly before Patrick and Murph began to attack Harvey's stomach as he started to laugh with tears pouring out of his eyes.

"Patrick, Murph you're being too loud." Mary said coming downstairs wearing her robe before they stopped to look at her.

"Sorry grandma." Murph said getting off Harvey.

"I feel more bad actually. Seems like you're enjoying being with your father." Mary commented.

"I'm just happy he's here." Murph said smiling as Harvey got up.

* * *

"Ok, this website says that white flowers symbolize remembrance and new beginnings." Patrick said taking his eyes off his phone and too Murph

"White it is." Murph said as they looked for white flowers whilst Harvey breezed through the shop door. "Alright. Paid for an hour's worth of parking so we can take our time. You lot found anything anything?"

"We need something white so Mommy will take you back." Murph said to Harvey as Patrick facepalmed himself sighing.

"This is why I keep you on the internet for a limited amount of time." Patrick said looking down at her and taking a deep breath.

"All you do on the internet is watch po-"

"More internet for you then." Patrick said handing her his phone.

"Can't wait to see all the messages you sent to your friends about your teachers." Murph said going through his WhatsApp but shocked to see that it was locked.

"You were saying short stuff?" Patrick asked smirking as Harvey still looked at them confused.

"Maybe we should get red roses. They're the symbol of love. Ask anyone from France." Murph said showing him the phone so that he could read the website.

"These are get well flowers," Harvey said lowering the phone from his face. "From the _three_ of us."

"Gotcha," Murph said winking as she grabbed a heart-shaped box of candies and a white teddy bear half Murph's size. "I think you should get Mommy these too. "Oh and a balloon!"

"Fine white roses. It's sorta like the best of both worlds." Harvey said picking up the white roses and but taking Murph's stuff away and putting it on the shelves.

"What are you doing?" Murph asked confused.

"I'm not gonna walk in there like it's Valentine's Day." Harvey said sighing. "Get me a card from there Murph."

Murph nodded and walked towards the car isle as he looked at Patrick who looked at him confused.

"Why not? Isn't that what woman love? Not that I'm dating anyone or been with a woman before." Patrick said nervously smiling.

"It's too much and we gotta go with something simple but shows that we're caring." Harvey said looking at them. "Plus she doesn't want that kind of attention from me, not anymore.

"She loves you." Patrick said.

"Except she's marrying your Uncle Stephen." Harvey said as his face turned into shock.

"What?" Patrick asked trying to make sense of his words as Harvey stared at the card. "No she wouldn't."

"I've seen it in her eyes. I know she's gonna get married to him, she was going to confess." Harvey said rubbing his forehead and looking back up at him. "Don't say a word to your sister. Keep quiet about it until your mother says so."

"That doesn't explain how you know?" Patrick's eyebrows furrowed, "Is that what you talked about that night?"

"I heard her mutter it when I was taking out. She said that if she married Stephen it'd be easier and from her eyes I knew she didn't love me anymore." Harvey said giving a fake smile to Murph as he took the card and signed it.

* * *

"Are any of you hungry?" Harvey asked turning his body around from his seat looking at both of his kids.

"Yeah. I could do with some shawarma." Murph said looking outside the window.

"You know I've never had shawarma." Harvey said parking along the sidewalk across an Arab restaurant.

"You've never had shawarma?" Patrick asked in shock.

"I didn't even know it existed until I saw The Avengers." Harvey said shrugging.

"We need to take you there like right now." Murph said dragging Harvey out of the car.

 _ **An hour later**_

"OMG! I SHOULD HAVE HAD THIS EARLIER!" Harvey said walking towards his car.

"You haven't lived if you haven't tasted shawarma." Murph said as he got inside the car with Patrick.

"That's something off my bucket list." Harvey said starting the car and driving off.

"We've got a few more hours to kill. What are we gonna do?" Patrick asked looking towards the window.

"You wanna see something?" Harvey asked looking at his window.

"Depends what it is?" Murph asked.

"It was a place I took your mother when I went London. You know the one with Patrick?" Harvey asked as Murph's face lit up from the memory of the photo.

"Wait so I've already been here?" Patrick asked crossing his eyebrows.

"During New Years Day." Murph said smiling.

"Wow. I never knew that." Patrick said as he scratched his hair.

"It's only a few minutes away from here. It was safe to say that she loved it."

* * *

They sauntered through a natural avenue of trees. As they came to the end of the trees it opened up into a lake. The air was warmer with lake seeming like a black void, the sun bouncing off its surface.

A 'plopping' sound as a fish broke the surface and ripples widening out. They were at at the edge of the lake now, the pebbles under foot, crunch, a moorhen was disturbed and ran off along the banking, distracting them from it's nest. A kestral attracted by the disturbance, hovered above the next field. The smell, of water and 'ozone', warmth and living. As they remained still, layers of water somehow become apparent, the open light layer with minnows darting about, the next darker layer, a large carp is sitting, watching you as you watch him. Then the dark bottom of the pond, the brown silt moving with life.

The dragonflies caught their attention, landing on a bullrush nearby, they lifted their gaze for a moment to see them in their metallic blue finery. From the corner of your eye they see a shape move in the water. They looked back and realised there were loads of fish, they never noticed before, they saw their black shapes but did not recognise them as fish. There was another 'pop' sound and concentric circles form on the lake, a Moorhen runs away startled.

"You took mom here?" Murph asked as they sat down on a bench.

"Yeah. We set Patrick here and your mother and I just watched everything in fascination." Harvey said sitting down next to Murph with Patrick sitting next to the older man.

"You remember what you were talking about?" Patrick asked curiously.

Harvey looked down smiling to himself and shook his head. "It was about her face."

* * *

 _Harvey started to chew on his chewing gum and turned his head to see what she was chewing as well. He lifted his feet onto the bench and held his arms around his knees and saw Donna turning her head to face him with a smile wider than his. She blew onto the bubble that was forming with her gum and it popped making her giggle._

 _"What?" Donna asked as she carried on chewing._

 _"I was just looking at your face." Harvey said as Donna turned her face away from his and looked at the lake. She turned her face to face him and he was still staring at her in fascination._

 _"Stop. What?" Donna asked. "Don't look too long."_

 _"Why?"_

 _"It's just something I don't like." Donna said as Harvey shook his head._

 _"I thought you liked feeling my eyes on you when you're not looking." Harvey said with a smirk._

 _"That was something you rudely read in my diary." Donna said looking away form him._

 _"Show me that face." Harvey said as Donna shook her head._

 _She turned her head facing him and carried on chewing before showing her full tongue at him making him laugh a little harder than he thought he would._

 _"Donna, you've got a really long tongue." Harvey said as Donna let out a small laugh. "That's a freakishly long tongue. Show it to me again."_

 _"No, you're laughing." Donna said looking away from him._

 _"C'mon give me some tongue." Harvey said as Donna looked down smiling._

 _"No way-"_

 _"Give me some of that tongue action."_

 _"Nu-huh-"_

 _"Show me that weird long tongue." Harvey whispered as Donna looked up shaking her head before looking at Harvey._

 _"Nope." Donna replied simply and looking away. "Not if you're gonna make fun of me."_

 _"I mean it's long."_

 _"It's not that long." Donna said defending herself._

 _"You ever seen a tongue that long before?" Harvey asked as Donna looked at him in shock._

 _"I don't know. I didn't even know it was so long." Donna said putting her legs on the bench and holding onto her knees._

 _"Let me see that tongue." Harvey said._

 _She opened her mouth slowly and showed a bit of her tongue and quickly put it back inside her mouth as Harvey let out a low laugh._

 _"You're gonna tease me now?" Harvey asked as she let out a bit more of her tongue._

 _"Maybe." Donna asked as Harvey started to lean his face towards her._

 _He put his hand around her back onto her hip and slowly moved her body towards his as he rested his forehead against hers._

 _"Well since I've never met someone with a tongue like yours I need to ask you something." Harvey whispered._

 _"You just did." Donna replied cheekily looking into his eyes._

 _"No it's not that." Harvey whispered putting a hand on his knee her bare knee. "I wanted to know-"_

 _He_ _crashed his lips against hers with her hand gripping his as she kissed him softly. Darting her tongue out, she licked at his lips, wanting more._

 _"Donna," he spoke in a low voice._

 _She raised her head to look into his brown eyes. Without saying a word, he leaned in and sucked her bottom lip into his mouth. He sunk his tongue into her mouth, kissing her with fervor. There was a power behind his kiss, like he was demanding the same amount of passion in return – and she gave it right back to him. She sat up as her hand grabbed onto his shoulders. He pushed her onto the bench, laying her on her back. Their tongues teased each other, as if they were dancing together._

 _His hands were gripping her waist, and they made their way under her shirt. "Fuck me Harvey."_

 _"Not until I do some tongue action of myself." Harvey whispered kissing his lips._

 _He then _slide his hands down to the button on her jeans. He unbuttoned her jeans as he stood and slide them down her legs. He pulled her in front of him, tracing the outline of her thong as it hugged her body. Goose bumps raised all over her as the wind caressed her body.__

 _He licked along the waistband of her thong, kissed her hip as he hooked his thumbs under the sides of her clothing and peeled them off of her as she got up slowly biting her lip and watched him carefully._

 _"You are so beautiful." He said as he stared at her._

 _ _Running his hands up and down the insides of her thighs, spreading her legs a little further with each stroke. He kissed her hip again and traced a trail with his tongue down her thigh and very faintly across her lips to her other thigh. She inhaled as he licked her slit, spreading her lips with his tongue.__

 _ _"Fuck." Donna moaned as her hips moved forward into him as he slide his hands behind her, his fingers tickling the crevasse and pulling her open. He flicked his tongue, back and forth applying a little more pressure with each lick and at the same time slide his fingers into me. Her knees were weak, her head thrown back in the moonlight as she moved her hands to the back of his head pushing it further into her.__ _ _"I love you so much."__


	20. Don't Bring Up Mommy

_**All I want to say is thank you for reading this story whether you've read it from day 1 or just binge read the whole story so far. I guess it's my job to tell you that there's about 2 chapters left in this story and it's been an incredible journey so far and thank you again to those who read this story and especially to those who've consistently reviewed this story. I mean I wouldn't have imagined this story had 100+ reviews yet alone 250+!**_

* * *

"I should've thanked you." Donna said to Stephen who shurgged.

"I deserved it. And you were right I should have kept a better eye on Murph." Stephen said running a hand through his hair. "Do you forgive me?" he asked rubbing a thumb on her fingers.

"If you forgive me first..."

Stephen smiled as leaned in to press his full lips to her cheek and place his forehead against his. The sound of footsteps made him move as Murph ran in.

"Mommy!" Murph said as Donna opened her arms to embrase Donna in a hug as she kissed her daughter on the side of her face.

"Morning Murph." Donna whispered.

"Morning Uncle Stephen," Murph said looking at Stephen and smiling.

"Morning, Princess."

"Daddy took us to breakfast and he's gonna take us to London Eye." Murph said excited.

"I thought you were scared of heights?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow.

"Daddy told me he'd pick me up so that I'll be safe when we go and see all of London." Murph said trying not to explode of happiness.

"Sounds exciting!" Donna said kissing the top of her head. "Take a picture for me."

"I'd love to do that." Patrick grinned and walked towards her mother kissing her cheek as she smiled giving him a half hug. Patrick glanced over his shoulder to find his find his father leaning against the door. Patrick rolled his eyes as he grabbed Harvey's hand and dragged him inside the room.

"Do you like the flowers?" Murph asked.

Harvey and Donna looked into each other's eyes for a brief second before she looked at the white roses. _._

"They're your favorite!" Murph siad.

"Yes there are, aren't they?" Donna said taking it from Patrick and smelling them. "They're lovely, thank you."

"Dad helped us pick them out." Patrick said as Harvey looked at her for a moment seeing her smile still in tact.

"I'll put them in the windowsill for you, Love." Stephen said taking the flowers and placing them on the window where the sun hit them.

* * *

A week later Donna and Harvey found themselves alone. Harvey freely walked in with Donna watching an older episode of Downton Abbey. She looked at him as he sat down and bit her lip looking at the door waiting for Stephen as she knew she wouldn't come for a whole.

"Did you have your physical therapy today?" Harvey asked checking his watch.

"Had it this morning." Donna said tilting her head as Downton Abbey finished.

"How are you feeling?" Harvey asked.

"Better. Managed to walk across the room so I'm mobile I guess." Donna said with her eyes still glued to the TV.

"When are they saying they can discharge you now that you're mobile?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Next week. I've got nothing to do anyway so it looks like I'll be home sooner than expected." Donna said as her chin dropped to her chest and her eyes squeezed in pain. Harvey jamp and slowly picked her head up.

"What's wrong?" Harvey asked as Donna slowly moved her head up.

"My calves start to cramp randomly. The hospital don't have a heating pad so Stephen's going to pick one up." Donna said breathing in and out trying to take the pane.

"Do you need me to rub them while you wait?" Harvey asked awkwardly making Donna look at him. "Or is it going to be awkward?"

"No. Would if be for you?" Donna asked.

"No." Harvey said sitting on the mattress with her feet on his knees. He rolled up the blanket slowly as he rested his hands on her thighs with one hand massaging thigh and the other massaging her feet.

Donna felt her calf relax as with her body as she watched the TV and wanted to moan at how good he was massaging her. "Remember when I fell down with Patrick and you'd do nothing but massage me all day?"

Harvey paused for a second and looked at her catching him off guard. "Wasn't my fault I got worried."

"You wouldn't even let me out of the house." Donna said looking at him and then back at the TV as he looked at her.

"I didn't want it to happen again, do you blame me? I was scared to death because you were holding your baby and you were so deep into your pregnancy. I didn't want to loose Patrick after all that."

"You were being cautious."

" _Overly_ cautious." Donna said correcting him.

"Well, I'm sorry for being an anal first time dad." Harvey said as she looked at him.

"Anal...don't say that again." Donna said smiling.

"Don't tell me you're..." Harvey said looking at her.

"No." Donna said blushing a little and looking back into his eyes as she broke contact for a moment running a hand through her hair.

"Did you fall down with Murph?" Harvey asked feeling like he had to talk about her as Donna dropped her gaze from him.

"Not but I had really bad heartburn." Donna said knowing how sore of a subject she was in front of him knowing that he wasn't there to raise her when she was a baby like he did for Patrick.

"I wish I was there but what hurts me more is that I had to watch a video of Patrick's personal messages to find out she's my daughter. And I found your letter, the least you could have done was sent it. Saves all the shock and pain." Harvey said to himself shaking his head.

"I want us to be friends again. This, you know, is too awkward between us." Donna said breaking the silence between them.

"Yeah, me too. I don't want us to be strangers anymore." Harvey said moving his eyes to her as he knew that there wasn't any way they'd be 'just friend' again.

"We're probably gonna see each other a bit often because of the kids. We can't just do this whole awkward teenage in a room with the parents not looking at each other thing" Donna explained. "We gotta do this for both Patrick and Murph's. We gotta got try getting along with each other around them."

"We're back!" Patrick and Murph said showing the heatpad.

"My legs were cramping again so Harvey offered to rub them out for me." Donna said as Stephen walked in wondering what was happening

* * *

"You don't have to buy me anything." Murph said holding Harvey's hand as they walked across the mall.

"I feel like I need too." Harvey said walking into a shoes shop.

"But you bought me enough when you thought I was your niece." Murph said trying to resist herself from his grip.

"Murph." Harvey said scolding her.

"Fine. Just get me a trench coat or something. And I need some books for school for revision." Murph said scratching the back of her neck awkwardly. "You know where to go...right?"

"Of course I do. I've been here before." Harvey said rolling his eyes.

"With mom?" Murph asked.

"Yeah with mom. I bought her some shoes from here to match her dress. She looked...stunning." He said smiling to himself.

"Are you and mom going to go back together?" Murph asked out of the blue.

"I don't know. Maybe you should ask your mom that...actually don't do that. The last thing she needs is a dilemma." Harvey said shaking his head.

"Can I ask you something?" Murph asked as Harvey looked down at her.

"Would it be better if we sat down?" Harvey asked pointing to the bench at the side as Murph nodded her head.

The both of them walked towards the bench and sat down as Harvey looked down the shopping mall realising how loud everyone was talking and how busy it was.

"Are you-are you going to be my daddy forever?" Murph asked as Harvey quickly looked down at her.

"What do you mean by that?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Like, I don't know. I mean Uncle Stephen acts like my daddy because he's always there so I'm just wondering if you're going to stay with us." Murph asked sadly as Harvey placed an arm around her.

"Murph, you're stronger than I could have ever imagined. The only way to know how strong, is to keep testing your limits. To be honest I don't know what's going to happen but I do know is that I'm going to stay with you. I'm not going anywhere Murph, all you have to do is call for me and I'll be there." Harvey whispered as Murph put her knees on the bench and wrapped her small arms around Harvey's neck placing her face on his shoulder crying slowly.

"Don't cry, I know you're trying your hardest but you're a big girl now...and big girls don't cry." Harvey whispered as he placed his arms around her back.

"Don't tell me not to cry if you don't know what I'm feeling inside." Murph whispered back.

"But I do know what you're feeling. You're confused. You're scared. But now you have to travel inwards to what you really fear it's inside you, there is no turning back. The situation between your mom and I isn't your fault, your will is everything. You have to become something other than what society intended you to come and aspire to become something greater." Harvey whispered.

"Batman Begins." Murph whispered as Harvey felt her smile.

"And Man Of Steel." Harvey whispered as Murph moved back and wiped her tears away. "Let's go get some toys for you."

* * *

"THIS IS TOO HARD!" Murph said trying to look at the card in her head but Patrick grabbing her attention.

"You can't cheat in _'Who am I!_ ' It's unfair." Patrick said shaking her head.

"You give up?" Harvey asked smirking.

"No. Start over." Murph said shaking her head. "Am I a man or a woman?"

"A man." Patrick replied.

"Am I a singer?" Murph asked.

"Go on Murph." Harvey said looking at the name on her card.

"Am I American?"

"No."

"English?" Murph asked raising her eyebrow.

"No."

"Spanish?"

"No."

"Latino?"

"No."

"So I guess I'm not Mr Worldwide." Murph said laughing a little.

"But he's based all around the world. Pitbul can't live without his passport." Patrick said shaking his head with a smile.

"Then I must be Canadian...OMG I'M JUSTIN BIEBER!" Murph said putting her finger on her card.

"Nope." Harvey said as Murph starts to pout to Harvey as an idea sparked in her head.

 **"I've broken my heart so many times,**

 **I stopped keepin' track.**  
 **Talk myself in**  
 **I talk myself out**  
 **I get all worked up**  
 **Then I let myself down.**

 **I tried so very hard not to lose it**  
 **I came up with a million excuses**  
 **I thought, I thought of every possibility**

 **And I know someday that it'll all turn out**  
 **You'll make me work so we can work to work it out**  
 **And I promise you kid, that I'll give so much more than I get**  
 **I just haven't met you yet."** Murph sang as she took her card off and was shocked to see 'DRAKE' written out.

"That's so adorable you know the lyrics to that song." Harvey said with a smirk.

"No fair! I didn't know he was Canadian." Murph said folding her arms and pouting.

"You used to call me on my cell phone. Late night when you need my love. Call me on my cell phone. Late night when you need my love. And I know when that hotline bling." Patrick sang.

"Shut up. It's your turn anyway. You'll never guess mine!" Murph said with a smirk.

"Fine. Am I a male?" Patrick asked.

"So you say." Murph replied.

"Actor?"

"Maybe."

"You know-"

"Yes he's an actor Patrick." Murph said rolling her eyes.

"Have I done comedies?"

"Sure have."

"Damn that doesn't help." Patrick said shaking his head.

"I'm gonna say...Leslie Nielsen based on the way you answered that-"

"Wrong it's your man crush Ryan G...as in Ryan 'I'd turned gay for you' Gosling." Murph said as Harvey started to laugh.

"Okay my turn." Harvey said putting his elbows on the table. "Male actor?"

"Yeahhhhhhh..."

"Jason Segel?" Harvey asked as Murph and Patrick looked at each other in shock.

"How did you know?" Patrick asked.

"Look sort of like him." Harvey said smiling.

"Oh my god no wonder...he's using the reflection on his phone!" Murph said launching herself onto Harvey tickling him.

"I'm getting away from here." Harvey said running towards the living room as Murph and Patrick chased Harvey towards the garden.

* * *

Donna's parents came in and said their goodbyes to her as they returned home to Cortland on the day Donna could return back home. Murph waited for her mother in the hall and said goodbye to the nurses who'd seen her run in and out of the hospital for the pass six months. One of the nurses gave her a book about how to be a nurse in case she wanted one whilst others gave her lollipops, blueberry muffins, chocolate slices as she was bombarded with sweets.

Donna came out of the bathroom wearing black jeans, a white top and red trainers with a cardigan on top. Her hair was quickly tied in a bun because she didn't want her hair tickling her face.

"I got you some sunflowers." Stephen said handing her bright yellow sunflowers. She took them and smiled.

"I love them."

"I got a car for us and-"

"Actually Havey's gonna take us home." Donna said as Stephen's face fell in shock and then anger.

"What?" Stephen asked in disbelief.

"He offered to drop us off and-"

"After all he's done to you and how much I've seen you endure over these years you're going to accept him back like one of your own? I've give your years of loyalty and watched your children grow up and this is how you repay me?" Stephen asked looking at him raising his voice earning Murph's attention.

"I'm not getting rid of you; it's only for a week and he'll be gone. Look at all the time you've been able to spend with Patrick and Murph. Harvey's only had a week." Donna said trying to get him to understand. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Put him in a hotel. Anywhere but in our house."

"There's no way I'm going to do that Stephen." Donna said putting her hands on her hips.

"Of course you wouldn't because you want to pretend you're a happy family like in a movie but that's not what the situation is Donna. Wake up!" Stephen said clapping his hands angrily as Harvey and Patrick heard the noise and stood by Murph watching what was happening.

"I can't shut him out again. Murph knows him now, Patrick's reconnected with him. I can't deny them their father. Patrick and Murph are my life. And Harvey is a part of theirs;."

"I don't care about the fact that Harvey's reconnected with his kid that he couldn't take care off and a kid he didn't know exist until a week ago. I don't like the thought of you and him in the house together. He's going to fuck your life up again!"

"He's not."

"Do you still love him?" Stephen said as he looked like he was heartbroken.

"It's complicated." Donna said sighing.

"I want _your_ life to be _our_ life and if he's got to be a byproduct because of Patrick and Murph, then I will get over it." Stephen said reassuring her as she felt relieved.

* * *

 _"I'm sorry I drew on your face!" Harvey screamed as he ran across the road chased by Donna in the rain of sunset._

 _"You asshole! You drew a skeleton on my face." Donna screamed as Harvey turned around to see her face._

 _"But it makes your cheekbones look sexy!" Harvey said smirking as he hid his face with his arms and bent forward shielding himself from Donna's slaps on his face and back._ _"I forgive you for slapping me now! You're gonna need me to forgive me for-"_

 _"HARVEY!" Donna yelped as he picked her up with top the half of his body dangling on his back giving her the chance to slap his back._ _"Let me down Harvey!"_

 _"I forgive you. You punch me and it's okay." Harvey said laughing a little as Donna pushed herself backwards but Harvey pushing her back in her original position._

 _"PUT ME DOWN!" Donna screamed._

 _"You mad?" Harvey asked putting her down on the ground slowly._

 _"YES I'M MAD!" Donna shouted putting the hood of her jacket on and running towards the front entrance of an abandoned theatre looking at Harvey._

 _"Donna!" Harvey shouted as he caught up with Donna putting the hood of his coat down. "So lets make this clear...you do or you don't like the makeup?"_

 _Donna immediately jumped onto Harvey's back putting an arm around his neck trying to choke him out behind but he managed to put his arms in between her hold and leaned against the door of the theatre. HE sat down slowly and moved Donna towards his lap with her arms still around his neck._

 _"So you like holding my neck?" Harvey asked with a smirk as Donna tilted her head with a smile._

 _Slowly she moved her hand towards the back of his head feeling his wet hair with his hands moving up her back. She moved her fingers inside his feel feeling it before grabbing it hard. He retaliated by grabbing a bunch of her wet hair pushing her face back forcing her to moan as she let go of his hair._

 _"I think I'm the one who should," He whispered kissing her neck. "kiss you," He whispered kissing the other side of his neck. "here." Finally crashing his lips against hers._

* * *

"Go ahead, we'll get your things." Patrick said as she rolled her eyes and walked towards the door.

"I'm not 80." Donna said looking back at them as Murph took her purse.

"Murph, take your mother inside," Harvey said as he and Patrick took out the luggage with Murph taking the keys from Patrick and opening the door.

"TADA!" Murph said opening her spinning like a ballet student as the house was decorated with balloons everywhere and a banner over the doorway to the living room reading, 'Welcome Home Mom."

"Oh, wow..."

"We spent all day yesterday getting the house ready for you." Murph said looking up at her as she kissed the top of her head.

"I love it." Donna said as Murph danced.

"The three of us even baked you a cake!" Murph said as Donna entered the kitchen. Patrick and Harvey took the luggage inside and shut the door making their way to the kitchen as Donna raised her at them.

"You all made this?" Donna asked looking at the chocolate cake in front of her.

"Well we tried to make it but Patrick burned it." Murph said.

"I didn't burn it." Patrick said rolling his eyes. "It overcooked."

Donna laughed as she turned around to look at them, "Thank you. All of three of you. I'm even happier to be home now." She said walking out and taking off her shoes.

"What are we doing for dinner?" Patrick asked.

"Not cake." Harvey asked looking at Murph who looked sad and then smiled.

"Can we go out or something?" Murph asked.

"I am a little tired but you guys can go." Donna said shurrging at her suggestion.

"We're not going somewhere without you." Patrick said walking next to her mother. "We can order in."

"Yes. Give me the number for a pizza place or do you want something-"

"No, no, no. Go have fun, go out, I'll be fine. I promise." Donna said.

"You need to eat too-"

"I'll give you money and bring me something. You all know what I like." Donna said opening her purse and hanging Harvey the money.

"You don't have to give me money." Harvey said.

"Good because you can give it to Patrick instead."

* * *

"Donna! Oh my God. It's great to hear from you. And hear your voice." Jared said smiling across the phone. "I visited you a few times but I couldn't come because Zoe trapped her finger in the door and it swelled up pretty bad.

"Awww the poor thing. Is my favorite niece's finger better?" Donna asked concerned.

"You know you shouldn't say that in front of Matthew-"

"And I'll just say he's my favorite nephew." Donna replied smiling. "and It's a good thing you stayed home. Sorry I never called sooner. I'm guessing mom told you everything." Donna said lying down.

"Yeah she told me everything. How are the kids?" Jared asked curiously.

"Great. Murph's...well Murph and Patrick's worried and-"

"He always was a mama's boy and I'm guessing Murph is worried like hell." Jared said laughing a little.

"She thought I was going to fall into the couch like quicksand." Donna said laughing a little.

"Poor thing." Jared said.

"The worse thing about this whole thing is that I woke up to Murph telling me she found Harvey." Donna said as Jared stayed silent for a moment remembering his conversations with Harvey.

"Well-"

"Jared I don't know what to do. On one hand I've got Stephen who loves me to bits but he can't stand Harvey because of what they've been through before. On the other hand Harvey still loves me but Murph loves him and he's reconnected to Patrick and he's staying her and-"

"Wait, he's still there? And he's staying with _you!_?"

"For another week. I just don't know what to do." Donna said looking up at the ceiling hoping God could speak to her and give her advice.

"Don, you have to think about the kids. Do what's best for them. I can't really say much because I've never been in this situation do what your guy tells you regardless of what your heart and mind think." Jared said as Donna nodded in agreement.

"Yeah. I mean this whole situation it's just so complicated...I don't know about you but I'm gonna take a nap." Donna said as Jared smiled.

"You always needed your beauty rest, didn't you? Speak to you later, maybe I can get the kids to speak with you." Jared said as Donna smiled.

"That'd be nice...bye." Donna said cutting the call and staring up the ceiling.

* * *

"Your birthday's tomorrow?" Patrick asked looking at him as he saw his driving license date of birth..

"Oh god." Harvey sighing.

"How old are you gonna be?" Murph asked as Patrick handed Harvey his wallet back.

"Much older than last year." Harvey said to Murph.

"Your birthday is on Karaoke Night?" Murph asked crossing her eyebrows as he looked at her immediately.

"Karaoke Night?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Don't think mom would take us anyway." Patrick said sighing as Murph put her elbows on the table and chin on her hands.

"Take you where?" Harvey asked curiously.

"Mom takes us every year to New York to this karaoke place and we just karaoke for about two hours. Afterwards we go to the bakery down the alleyway and we have chocolates and ice creams and all the dessert we want." Murph said looking at Harvey.

"Karaoke Night." Harvey whispered to himself as he closed his eyes and remembered taking Donna down the alleyway and kissing her in the sugar storm.

"What did you say dad?" Patrick asked looking at him as Harvey opened his eyes.

"You celebrate this every year?" Harvey asked looking at both of them.

"Yup." Murph said echoing the 'p' letter.

"Your Uncle Stephen do it too?" Harvey asked not helping it.

"Never invited him." Patrick said.

* * *

Donna walked back from the kitchen and she saw a journal sitting in the kitchen that she gifted to her. She smiled as she saw that it was slightly filled. She took the journal and settled into the couch lying down.

She opened the journal. And the first page was titled:

 _My Daddy._

Donna's stomach dropped. The way the children lapped up every second with their father that they could made her feel guilty by the second.

 **Our Favorite Frozen Character.**

 **I love Elsa but Daddy loves Anna! But he says that if Elsa went to the Sahara Desert then she'd die which is sad because Elsa would just freeze the Sahara desert with her powers but he also says that it's not a winter movie because it's set in summer. That hurt me a lot!**

 **Tea Time.**

 **1\. He prefers coffee. Strong. With Whipped Cream...yuk! TOO MUCH SUGAR CAN CAUSE DIABETES  
** **2\. Use the mug I gave him because it matches his suit and tie  
** **3\. Never mention Batman and Robin or the prequels  
** **4\. No music from Miley Cyrus, Nicky Minaj but Katy Perry is okay because she has 'nice assets' - don't know what that means!  
** **5\. He prefers English biscuits because they're less suggary which is blashphamy (must check definition and spelling)** **  
** **6\. Sit him at end of the table like a king-kind of like King Arthur...except the table is rectangular and not round**

 **Favorite Dessert: CHOCOLATE!**

 **Favorite Day of the Week: Friday, Saturday, Sunday...grumpier on Mondays like most people**

Then it came to an old picture of Harvey and Donna together.

 **Favorite Memory: The day he married Mommy  
** **But don't bring up Mommy  
** **Bringing up mommy makes him sad**

Donna didn't realize she'd teared up until two drops fell. She wiped her face with her sleeve and put the book back on the table.

* * *

"What's the plan?" Murph asked looking at Harvey.

"What plan?" Harvey asked curiously as he drove his way home.

"About tomorrow and Karaoke Night?" Patrick asked looking at Harvey from the front seat.

"And about moving in and staying forever and us being a family again." Murph asked as Harvey grit his jaw getting angrier.

"We're not having this conversation." Harvey said staring at each other them. "The two of you are to stay out of it. I'm begging you and I don't want to shout at the both of you. I know where you're coming from, honestly I do. I understand what you've been through but this doesn't have to do with you. It's between me and your mother. She doesn't respond well to other people getting involved in personal matters like this and she doesn't need that extra pressure now that she's back home."

"She still loves you, Dad. You just have to _talk to her._ " Patrick said putting his head on the glovebox.

"Yeah! Tell her all the things you told me when I was your niece!" Murph said leaning forward as Harvey's anger shot making his slam the brakes at the red light causing them to jolt forward for a moment with the seatbelts pushing them back onto the seat.

"ENOUGH! If you don't stop harassing me with questions and suggestion I'll leave the house and spend my last fews days at a hotel downtown fucking a whore!" Harvey shouted as the children paused for a moment.

"What's a whore?" Murph asked tilting her head.

"Oh great." Patrick said facepalming himself.

* * *

"Kids asleep?" Donna asked entering the living room.

"Murph's out cold and Patrick's staying up on his laptop." Harvey said sitting down as Donna stood in the kitchen.

"Want anything to drink?" Donna asked popping her head out of the door.

"I'm fine." Harvey said as he heard the voices of Patrick and Murph whispering to each other but doing a lousy job of it. "I wanted to talk to you about tomorrow. The kids wanted you to—"

"I'm tired. Can it wait until morning?" Donna asked holding her mug of tea and tilting her head.

"Yeah..erm, sure." Harvey said nodding.

"Good. I'm going to head to bed. You need anything?" Donna asked.

"Got any sheets?" Harvey asked.

"Yeah." Donna said walking in the kitchen and handing him some sheets. "Goodnight..." She whispered and then paused paused before smirking. "...Mr Speter."

"Goodnight." Harvey whispered back as he smirked to himself remembering that she'd say to him when they were friends. He walked towards her and looked at her as he felt her breath hit his nose.

"Nice Mrs...Miss Paulsen." Harvey said feeling weird.

Licking her lips, she offered her hand for a handshake which he looked at awkwardly as he shook it, "We'll talk about whatever the kids wanted."


	21. Karaoke Night

"What are you doing?" Harvey asked walking towards Donna in the kitchen.

"Cooking breakfast." Donna said looking back at him.

"That's a lot of work, Donna. You look like you're cooking for the army. _We're_ supposed to be taking care of _you_." Harvey said scolding her.

"I just need a little assistance here and there." Donna said looking at him.

"But—"

"But it's your birthday big boy." Donna said smiling and taking a sip of her coffee. "You're getting old so you better get used to minions helping you everyday." She said teasing him.

"I know but I'm still waiting for my age to catch up so until then I can enjoy the perks of not being confined to a wheelchair." Harvey said staring at his breakfast.

"Eat up. You know what they say in Germany? Eat dinner like a peasant, lunch like a middle class citizen and breakfast like a King." Donna said lecturing him with her wooden spoon.

"And why would you know about sayings in Germany? You been taking German?" Harvey asked tilting his head.

"A little." Donna said shrugging.

"You didn't have to do this." Harvey said taking his plate and looking down at her.

"But I wanted to make you your usual Dexter special breakfast just to help me get in a mood. You always used to say that blood orange juice was when you'd imagine drinking blood." Donna said turning around smiling.

"Forgive me for my psychotic train of thought. I mean we binge watched Dexter and saw American Psycho afterwards. It was like my brain was reqired and I saw the light with its subtle off white coloring." Harvey whispered as Donna laughed a little.

"You're not allowed to quote American Psycho in the kitchen especially when there's newspapers here and I keep the raincoats over there." Donna said with authority as Harvey nodded.

"Your kitchen, your rules." Harvey said placing his hands up defensively.

"I'm sorry you have to spend your birthday here." Donna said shaking her head.

"I wouldn't wanna be anywhere else." Harvey said tilting her head and tasting his coffee and rolling his eyes back remembering how good she used to make coffee for him.

"Hey. Me and Murph had an idea." Patick said walking into the kitchen and pouring himself apple juice. "Today's Karaoke Night. Can we spend it with Dad?"

"Weren't you going to spend it with him anyway? I wouldn't mind if you guys do something different this year." Donna said looking at Patrick.

"I want to keep tradition. We want to go to New York." Patrick said looking at her mother hoping she'd change her mind

"I was too tired to go out to eat last night much less go all the way to New York." Donna said putting her hands on Patrick's shoulders.

"Pleassseeeeeeeee." Murph said entering the kitchen as she kneeled placing her arms around Donna's legs.

"Up now." Donna said rolling her eyes.

"Patrick, Murph we can't do this to your mother if she's too tired." Harvey said to them.

"I've never gotten to spend a special day with both of you." Murph said as as Harvey and Donna looked down on the floor with the same expression.

"And with Dad leaving soon who knows when he'll be back." Patrick said looking at her sister smirking as they're plan was working.

"Fine. I'll try but no promises." Donna said as they both hugged her.

The kids took their breakfast and ran inside to the living room as Donna put her elbows on the kitchen counter sitting on the stool and burying her face in her hands. Harvey got and placed his plate in the sink and looked at her.

"Why'd you agree? You know you won't be able to handle the journey." Harvey said washing his hands still looking at her.

"Why do you think?" Donna asked, head lifting up to face him.

"You know you can't go to New York and back in the same day." Harvey said concerned for her.

"I usually stay at my old place whenever we go." Donna said which opened his eyes.

"You still own your old apartment?" Harvey asked curiously.

"I rent it to Liz-"

"Liz your cousin or Liz your friend?" Harvey asked smirking.

"Remember the last time you talked about Liz-"

"Which you bought up when you asked what I thought about her." Harvey said making her remember.

"You said you'd have a one night stand with her." Donna said holding her hips.

"Because you told me to answer honestly which I did." Harvey replied defending himself.

"You should have lied." Donna said tilting her head.

"Then you would have called me a liar. I don't win in this argument, don't I?" Harvey asked.

"That's why I'm the best around...and NO BODY'S GONNA LET ME DOWN!" Donna said singing.

* * *

"Make that two fruit and cheese plates and a mug of hot chocolate with vanilla ice cream." Harvey said ordering the food from the menu to the waitress.

"Harvey." Donna scolded. "I thought you were just ordering snacks, not a three course dinner. Plus it doesn't help we're on a plane!"

"I got it for me." He said grinning. "Oh and get a red bull for the misses. She gets cranky whenever she's tired."

"I do not get cranky Harvey Reginald Specter." Donna said looking at her shocked.

"Of course you do. There's three things you get cranky over. Lack of red bull to fight jet lag, whenever you see a bad Nicolas Cage impression which means you get cranky whenever you see Nicolas Cage and...the other thing." Harvey said remembering that Patrick and Murph were next to him.

"What's the other thing?" Donna asked.

"I can't say it." Harvey said leaning forward so that Donna could hear it as she gasped and smacked his arm.

"You don't even mention that sort of thing here." Donna said darting her eyes at him.

"I'm sorry but it's true. Remember when I tried fasting for a month to get my body to naturally detox itself?" Harvey asked raising his eyebrow.

"Fasting involves not eating, not denying me sex!" Donna replied as Harvey saw her crazy eyes.

"And you say you don't get cranky over having sex for a while. I mean you're getting cranky now." Harvey said as Donna shook her head.

"I'm not getting cranky!" Donna said folding her arms.

"Whatever makes you sleep." Harvey said as Donna turned her face away from him and smirked to herself.

* * *

"You gotta have this." Harvey said handing her his mug of hot chocolate with some vanilla ice cream.

"No Harvey." Donna said rolling his eyes.

"It's a swirling wonderland of sparkling, white pleasure. Let it fill your senses with cascading fluffy pillows of confort and excitement as you have never felt before." Harvey described as Donna smiled.

"Wow. Harvey. That was beautiful." Donna commented.

"I just read it from the description at the bottom. See?" Harvey asked showing her a piece of a paper as Donna grew angry.

"Now there's no way I'm having that after what you just pulled...besides; I might get diabetes." Donna said as Harvey laughed loudly.

"You won't get diabetes. Your parents didn't have diabetes and you might be a sugar freak-"

"It's called a sweet tooth-"

"-but you're also a green tea freak. You were obsessed with detoxifying your body so eat up. I know you want some of that delicious-"

"Fine." Donna said giving up and picked the ice cream off Harvey's plate, "Oh my God," her eyes closed.

"Here," Harvey picked up spoon as their heads bent together.

 _CLICK_.

"That'll be cute." Murph said as the Polaroid photo came out.

"Was it your idea to give her a Polaroid camera?" Donna asked looking at her.

"I couldn't help it." Harvey said smiling.

"Do you know what's going to happen now?" Donna asked.

"I'm starting to worry based on your tone-"

"She's going to stalk Chris Evans in Times New Square and take pictures of him." Donna said as Murph lauched herself as her mother.

"IT'S NOT STALKING!" Murph said as Harvey began to tickle her. "I surrender!"

* * *

They walked through the chilly night of New York and saw that there was a karaoke contest. They walked in and heard the gasp of a woman from the table. They looked towards her as she started to run towards them.

"Donna? Is that you?" Rachel asked hugging Donna and squeezing her to death.

"Hey Rachel. It's been a long time hasn't it?" Donna asked squeezing her hard as well.

"Wait, Aunty Rachel knows Mommy?" Murph asked looking at Rachel.

"Mommy?" Rachel asked looking at Murph and then at Harvey.

"It's a long story." Harvey said sighing.

"Why didn't you call me Donna. I thought you were gone forever and we'd never see each other." Rachel said getting emotional as she hugged her again as she looked at Patrick who didn't know what to say.

"Oh my god you've grown up so much." Rachel said moving over to Patrick and hugging her as Patrick awkwardly hugged her back.

"I'd never forget what you look like Aunty Rachel." Patrick replied.

"And stop calling me Aunty. I'm not even 40." Rachel said rolling her eyes.

"So she says." Donna said smirking.

"Donna?"

"And here comes Mike." Harvey said turning around as Mike stared at them with his jaw dropped.

"You found her?" Mike asked Harvey as he nodded. "Thank god. It's been boring without you."

"Don't hug me to death people." Donna said as she embraced a hug form Mike.

"I'm sorry but you've only been gone for 11 years." Rachel said grabbing her hand and taking her to their table.

"Patrick. Holy shit you've grown." Mike said looking at Patrick.

"I wasn't going to turn into a midget now." Patrick said hugging Mike and looking down at Murph.

"How come you've got your niece as well?" Mike asked looking back at Harvey.

"She's my...daughter." Harvey said.

"She's your what?" Mike asked looking at her as she grinned.

"I'll explain on the way to the table."

* * *

Twenty minutes later, after everybody settled, the lights were dimmed, as the bar owner walked to stage.

"What's happening everybody?!" He asked as everyone shouted. "Are we ready for some karaoke?"

The crowd erupted in a large "YES!" as the bar owner smiled.

"Great because first off is our yearly regular favorite Patrick Specter." The bar owner said pointing to Patrick as the crowd cheered. Patrick got up to stage and took the mic smirking like Harvey would as he looked at the crowd and the spotlight hit his face.

"I'm gonna sing a little song by Iggy Azalea." Patrick said as everyone on Harvey's table look mortified with Murph smirking as the guys in the crowd bood but the women cheering.

"I was expecting the reaction. I'm not gonna lie and the song's called Fancy." Patrick said smirking.

"I hate that song." A guy in the crowd shouted as everyone shouted.

"Mommy can I record this?" Murph asked taking her mom's phone.

"Why do you wanna record it?" Donna asked raising her eyebrow.

"I wanna send it to his friends." Murph said giggling as Donna smiled and handed Murph her phone.

The beat started as Patrick took the mic and walked forward putting the mic next to his mouth.

 **First thing's first, I'm the realest (realest)** Patrick said as the women started to hoot at him.  
 **Drop this and let the whole world feel it (let them feel it)  
** **And I'm still in the Murda Bizness  
** **I could hold you down, like I'm givin' lessons in physics (right, right)  
** **You should want a bad bitch like this (huh?)  
** **Drop it low and pick it up just like this (yeah)  
** **Cup of Ace, cup of Goose, cup of Cris  
** **High heels, somethin' worth a half a ticket on my wrist (on my wrist)  
** **Takin' all the liquor straight, never chase that (never)  
** **Rooftop like we bringin' '88 back (what?)  
** **Bring the hooks in, where the bass at?  
** **Champagne spillin', you should taste that**

 **I'm so fancy** Patrick said as he started to break dance with Murph capturing every moment and laughing.  
 **You already know**  
 **I'm in the fast lane**  
 **From L.A. to Tokyo**  
 **I'm so fancy**  
 **Can't you taste this gold?**  
 **Remember my name**  
 **'Bout to blow**

Patrick finished as he bowed his head earning a clap from the audience.

"Everyone clap for Patrick Specter." The bar owner said as everyone clapped.

* * *

"Ladies and Gentleman coming to the ring. Our very own eyebrow raising, cookie baking, pie eating sultan of sasssssss...It's Donna Paulsen."

Donna took the stage as men and women whistled making her roll her eyes. She took to the stage and Harvey stared at her as the spotlight hit her, he wanted to go onto the stage and hold her from behind to kiss her neck but his attention changed to her song choice.

"The song I've decided to sing in front of you fine people is Bruno Mars's masterpiece...and no it's not depressing." Donna said as the beat dropped.

 **One, two, one, two, three**

 **Oh, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Ooh!**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Ooh!**

 **Never had much faith in love or miracles**  
 **Ooh!**  
 **Never wanna put my heart on the line**  
 **Ooh!**  
 **But swimming in your water is something spiritual**  
 **Ooh!**  
 **I'm born again every time you spend the night**  
 **Ooh!**

 **'Cause your sex takes me to paradise**  
 **Yeah, your sex takes me to paradise**  
 **And it shows, yeah, yeah, yeah**

 **'Cause you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven**  
 **For too long, for too long**  
 **Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven**  
 **For too long, for too long**

 **Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Ooh!**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Ooh!**

 **You bring me to my knees, you make me testify**  
 **You can make a sinner change his ways**  
 **Open up your gates 'cause I can't wait to see the light**  
 **And right there is where I wanna stay**

 **'Cause your sex takes me to paradise**  
 **Yeah, your sex takes me to paradise**  
 **And it shows, yeah, yeah, yeah**

 **'Cause you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven**  
 **For too long, for too long**  
 **Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven**  
 **For too long, for too long**

 **Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah**  
 **Can I just stay here?**  
 **Spend the rest of my days here?**  
 **Oh, oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah**  
 **Can't I just stay here?**  
 **Spend the rest of my days here?**

 **'Cause you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven**  
 **For too long, for too long**  
 **Yeah, you make me feel like I've been locked out of heaven**  
 **For too long, for too long**

 **Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Ooh!**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,**  
 **Ooh!**

Donna walked down the stage as women started to whistle at her as she blew kisses to them.

"How you like me now?" Donna asked smirking.

"It made you hotter." Harvey whispered to himself smiling.

* * *

"Okay now we have a fan favorite returning. He hasn't sang here for over 11 years and he looks like he's on the verge of growing white hair. Put your hands together for HARVEY SPECTER!"

The crowd erupted in cheers as Harvey got up from his table and to the stage waving his hand at everyone.

"Okay. I get it, I'm pretty popular around these parts." Harvey said as the crowd laughed a little. "The song I'm going to sing is Sam Smith."

"Sam Smith?" Donna muttered to herself nervously.

"Want me to record it?" Murph asked.

"Sure." Donna said giving her a nervous smile.

 **I don't have much to give, but I don't care for gold**  
 **What use is money, when you need someone to hold?**  
 **Don't have direction, I'm just rolling down this road**  
 **Waiting for you to bring me in from out the cold**

 **You'll never know the endless nights, the rhyming of the rain,**  
 **Or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name**

 **Pack up and leave everything,**  
 **Don't you see what I can bring**  
 **Can't keep this beating heart at bay**  
 **Set my midnight sorrow free,**  
 **I will give you all of me**  
 **Just leave your lover, leave him for me.**  
 **Leave your lover, leave him for me.**

 **We sit in bars and raise our drinks to growing old**  
 **Oh, I'm in love with you and you will never know,**  
 **But if I can't have you I want this life alone**  
 **Spare you the rising storms and let the rivers flow**

 **You'll never know the endless nights, the rhyming of the rain**  
 **Or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name**

 **Pack up and leave everything,**  
 **Don't you see what I can bring**  
 **Can't keep this beating heart at bay**  
 **Set my midnight sorrow free,**  
 **I will give you all of me**  
 **Just leave your lover, leave him for me**  
 **Leave your lover, leave him for me.**  
 **Leave your lover, leave him for me.**

* * *

"Next up everyone's favorite short stuff. Murph Specter!"

Murph walked up nervously and took to the stage but she was too short for the microphone. She tiptoes and grabbed the mic looking at everyone.

"What song you gonna sing for us this time?" The bar owner asked her.

Murph called him over as he kneeled down and whispered inside his ear. The bar owner smiled as he took to the crowd.

"Ladies and Gentleman, prepare yourselves to sing along with her."

Angela began to slap her thighs twice and clap after that repeating over until the crowd cheered knowing what she was going to sing. The whole crowd began to copy her as did Patrick, Donna, Murph, Mike and Rachel as the song then kicked in.

 **Buddy you're a boy make a big noise**  
 **Playin' in the street gonna be a big man some day**  
 **You got mud on yo' face**  
 **You big disgrace**  
 **Kickin' your can all over the place**  
 **Singin'**

Angela pointed the mic to the crowd as the audience sang the chorus.  
 **We will we will rock you  
**  
 **C'mon sing it louder!  
We will we will rock you  
**The crowd sang louder as Angela began to feel the energy from the crowd and feed off it

 **Buddy you're a young man hard man**  
 **Shoutin' in the street gonna take on the world some day**  
 **You got blood on yo' face**  
 **You big disgrace**  
 **Wavin' your banner all over the place**

 **We will we will rock you**  
 **(Sing it!)**  
 **We will we will rock you**

 **Buddy you're an old man poor man**  
 **Pleadin' with your eyes gonna make you some peace some day**  
 **You got mud on your face**  
 **Big disgrace**  
 **Somebody better put you back into your place**

 **We will we will rock you**  
 **(Sing it!)**  
 **We will we will rock you**

 **(Everybody)**

 **We will we will rock you**  
 **We will we will rock you**

 **(Alright)**

Angela finished as the whole crowd stood up to a standing ovation shouting "ONE MORE TIME! ONE MORE TIME!"

* * *

"You'll ready to go home?" Harvey asked them as they looked tired.

"Can't we just stay here?" Murph asked sleepily.

"We could but we'll reach there by the morning and then we can sleep the day." Harvey said smiling as they reached the airport.

* * *

 **THE NEXT MORNING**

"Is it really that late?" Donna asked walking into the kitchen and seeing the time.

"Donna, 12:30 in the afternoon isn't late." Harvey said handing her a cuban sandwich.

"You always knew how to make a good Cuban Sandwich." Donna said as Harvey handed her over a chips packet and orange juice.

"Are they awake?" Donna asked signalling to the living room as she heard the TV on.

"They passed back out in an hour." Harvey said as Donna took a bite of her cuban sandwich and nodding her head at the taste.

"So what have the three of you got planned together?" Donna asked looking at him and taking a sip of her orange juice.

"Murph wanted to watch the soccer game this evening at Wembley. It'd be great if you came along too." Harvey said adjusting his tie.

"I don't want to take your time away from the kids." Donna said looking up at him.

"But none of us mind." Harvey said confused walking towards her.

"But I do."

"Why? I don't understand." Harvey asked tilting his head.

"Yesterday was a special occasion but I don't want them to get their hopes up. We can't pretend to be happy every time-"

"You were pretending to be happy?" Harvey asked feeling hurt and anger.

"Harvey. They knew to know the boundaries-"

"Boundaries?" Harvey asked raising his voice.

"I've got my time with the kids and you've got your time and they don't overlap like parallel lines unless it's a one off."

"Donna it doesn't have to be like that." Harvey said standing in front of her.

"It's going to be school years with me and summers with you. Thanksgiving with me, Christmas with you. And then we change with the birthdays." Donna said as Harvey rubbed his face angrily.

"Why do we have to make them go through that." Harvey said raising his voice.

"Top drawer there's an envelope; get it out for me." Donna said as Harvey turned around to open the drawer and saw a yellow envelope in front of him. He picked it up slowly and passed it over to her as she nervously, with her hands shaking too out a piece of A4 papers along with other papers inside the envelope and looked down at them.

"Harvey I can't say this to you but I won't just slip it under the door and run away." Donna said as Harvey looked down at her sadly. "You were a good husband Harvey; probably a great one and you were there when I need someone the most."

"What are you doing?" Harvey asked gently shaking his head as Donna carried on reading the piece of paper.

"This isn't your fault, it isn't anyone's fault. I was broken, I tried to fix myself for Patrick and eventually for Murph and I think I'm supposed to stay broken. Maybe we all are-"

"What's in the envelope Donna?" Harvey asked.

"I won't insult you by saying-"

"Please stop talking from that for just a second. What's in that envelope Donna?" Harvey asked again angrily.

"It's not my place to-"

"What's in the envelope?"

"You've always been the best shoulder to-"

"Please stop talking from that." Harvey pleaded with his voice trembling a little. "What's in the evenlope?"

"Please-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Harvey asked raising his voice and silencing her as he took the envelope and scrunched her speech onto the floor. He took the papers from the envelope and threw the envelope on the floor as he stared at the bold title of the document.

 **ACTION FOR A DIVORCE**

"Is Stephen making you do this?" Harvey asked looking down at her as Donna shook her head. "You just...you don't...you don't think about seeing me for 11 years and when I come here to see you living your fantasy in England with a kid I never knew existed you give me this?"

"Harvey-"

"No!" Harvey said looking at her. "No, no! I'm your husband. We made **fucking** vows. You say it, not that fucking piece of paper!" Harvey shouted as Donna shook her head trying not to cry. "You say it right now! I want this over! I want to hear it from whatever I know is left from my wife! Fucking say it! You fucking say it Donna!" Harvey shouted as Donna moved forward.

"I want a fucking divorce!" Donna screamed and then falling back against the wall as Harvey looked down onto the paper trying to keep his emotions in tact.

"What was going to happen if I never came here to see you? Would you realise that your husband was suffering every living minute rotting away in New York and then you'd magically come to his place and hand his these papers expecting me his sign them? Because if that's true then you're even more of a heartless bitch than I thought you were." Harvey commented as Donna stormed forward grabbing his shirt.

"DON'T YOU DARE CALL ME A HEARTLESS BITCH! You left me and Patrick all alone! Don't blame this all on me you bastard!" Donna said as Harvey moved her hands away from his shirt.

"But the difference was that at the end of the day I wanted to come back to my wife and kids at home. You left me and didn't want to come back so fuck you Donna!" Harvey shouted back.

"You stopped loving me so there was no home to come back too even if I still love you." Donna said as both of them stared at each other for a while calming themselves down.

Harvey looked at the divorce papers and ran a hand through his head and started to shake it.

"You know what scared me Donna? What scares me is that one day, you'll be the story I'll tell my Murph and our grand daughters, when she's curled up in bed, wrapped in blankets heartbroken, when she hasn't eaten anything in days with the voicemails she's left him, when she hasn't been able to sleep because the goodbye that broke her shatters her bones all over again every time she closes her eyes. I'll have to climb into bed with her and she'll lay her head on my lap and I'll try to brush her hair from her face and her tears will soak through my shirt and I'll tell her about the girl I met in the bar when I was in my twenties, who sat across to me at work, who I fell in love with in a few days, who I ended up marrying and having kids with...who fucking destroyed me. And I'll tell her about how it hurt. How it hurt so badly it almost killed me. How it hurt so badly that I stopped going to work for a year to stop the pain of seeing an empty chair across of me. So badly I had to go to therapy to get pills and thought about taking too much. So badly I bought a noose and hung it on top of the ceiling staring at it all day waiting for the day your memories would hurt me so much that killing myself would make me feel numb. And then I'll tell her about how it got better. How it stopped hurting. How I went back to work at the cost of boredom. How I finally got out of bed because feeling the weight of the world on my shoulder. How I stopped taking the pills because they weren't working anymore. How I finally got down the noose because it wouldn't help me with the pain I was suffering. But I won't tell her is that sometimes I still have dreams about you and how I can hardly breathe the next day or about the pictures of you I had hidden under my bed that I can't see anymore because I burned the whole collection because of how much pain it bought back. Instead I pray I'll tell our daughter and grad daughters about how we fell apart years ago, and found our way back. And that woman I fell in love with over 20 years ago is in the living room reading a bed time story." Harvey said as Donna looked down at the floor sadly trying not to let a tear escape.

"You know what the worst part is? Nothing ever lasts and I think it's a tragedy." Donna whispered.

"Some things last." Harvey whispered back as Donna looked up slowly seeing the hurt in his face. "I'll get to work. Someone has to draw them papers up." Harvey said turning around as his face dropped in shock to see Patrick and Murph standing in the doorway. "How much did you hear?"

Donna looked over his shoulder and froze as they walked forward.

"All of it." Patrick said as Donna looked down in shame.

"Guys—"

"I hate you!" Patrick said glaring at her mother. "We have a chance to be a family, to be together and...we just got Dad back and you're shoving him away."

"Don't put this all on her." Harvey said looking at Patrick.

"Guys I'm not going to keep him from the two of you. We'll make sure you get lots of time with him." Donna said.

"That's not the point!" Patrick shouted as Donna jumped. "Do you have any _idea_ how much Dad loves you?! Do you know how many girls who'd love to have guys like Dad?!"

"Yes, I-"

"And _you_ still love _him_! You're just a fucking coward!" Patrick shouted.

"Don't you dare talk to me like that. I'm not putting myself through it again. We're getting a divorce and that's that." Donna said trying to get him to understand.

"So you can fuck Stephen without feeling guilty?" Patrick asked gritting his teeth.

"Patrick." Harvey said scolding him.

"What did you just say to me?!" Donna asked in shock.

"If you marry Stephen and it means Dad has to leave then I'll go with him. I don't give a fuck if I'm going Cambridge, I'll transfer to NYU or Harvard because I can afford to take 5 years and jerk off and still get into there and I'll never come back. I'll cut _you_ off like you cut off dad for 11 years, how about that?"

"What?" Donna asked gasping as a tear fell from her eye.\

"He doesn't mean that." Harvey said trying to stop her from getting angry.

"I hate you!"

Donna walked herself from the kitchen as Harvey looked at Patrick.

"Apologize to your mother. Right now." Harvey said pointing to her direction.

"No."

"Go up and tell her you're sorry."

"Why should I?" Patrick asked crossing her arms.

"She doesn't deserve that after all she's done and sacrificed for you and your sister. She moved to London to get you a better life!"

Murph walked out of the kitchen and saw Donna throwing her bag on the floor along with some clothes, toothbrush and does. "Mommy, where are you going?"

"I don't know."

"When are you coming back?" Murph asked.

"I need to be alone, Murph," Donna said to her.

"Please! Wait for me!" Murph said walking towards her.

Harvey and Patrick walked out of the kitchen and saw the door open as Donna walked off.

"WAAAAIT!" Murph shouted as started to wear her shoes on as Donna got into her car.

"Donna, come back in the house. Please." Harvey said.

"Momma don't get in the car." Patrick said.

"MOM STOP!" Patrick shouted as she drove off with tears in her red puffy eyes as she looked into the side mirror and saw Murph chased after her but get on her knees when she was too far away to chased.

"Is this what you wanted Patrick? Hurt her so bad she couldn't even stay in the house. We don't do them things Patrick. Blame me for me and Donna for not getting back together. You don't know how many times I wasn't there for you or our marriage." Harvey said settling down on the couch and grabbing his head as he looked down on the floorboard.

"I was angry...I...I didn't know." Patrick whispered as Murph walked towards her father and sitting on his lap.

"Daddy, can you go get Mommy back?" Murph asked with her eyes red from her cries.

"She'll be back Murph." Harvey whispered as he picked up hugging her. "I promise."


	22. Battle Scars

**_AUTHOR'S NOTE: THANK YOU EVERYBODY! This is the last chapter in this pretty crazy else-world story and I want to thank everyone that stayed on this journey and to anyone else who might be reading this for the first time. Thank you for being supportive I mean this chapter as of 25th January 2016 as over 300 reviews and who knows where this'll end up at because the sky is the limit. So enjoy yourself..._**

 ** _Oh and this chapter has parts that are rated M for language._**

* * *

"Why isn't she home yet?" Murph asked playing with her ponytail.

"Or called?" Patrick added as they watch the soccer match.

"I told you guys. We need to give her time." Harvey said handing them some Doritos as Murph rejected them shaking her head.

"Three days isn't enough time?" Patrick complained.

"It's all your fault." Murph said angrily looking at Patrick.

"Shut up." Patrick replied, offended..

"She thinks we don't love her because you had to get angry at her. Why would she come back?" Murph asked questioning him making him more angry.

"WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT! THE HELL! UP!" Patrick shouted gritting his teeth.

"What you gonna do Pat? Hate me too and drive me out of the house?" Murph asked nailing in the final nail in his coffin.

"Would you stop?" Patrick said looking on the floor and concentrating on his breathing trying hard not let his breathing take control of him. He stood up and waltzed away towards his room.

"Patrick." Harvey said trying to grab his arm but feeling it being brushed off by his son as he ran to his room.

"I'm sorry." Murph said timidly realising what she'd done.

"Let me go speak to him, you stay here Murph." Harvey said getting up and walking up the stairs.

Once he reached Patrick's room he knocked on it and waited for a response which he never got. He put his hand on the door knob and turned it opening the door slightly seeing Patrick looking at a photo frame and quickly putting it away.

"Son." Harvey said opening the door as Patrick put his feet across the bed facing away from him. "Murph's sorry about what she said."

"It's not just about mom." Patrick said putting his hands on his face as Harvey realised he was crying.

He shut the door behind it and walked around the bed and sat down next to him placing an arm around him. "What's the matter?"

"It's Natalie." Patrick whispered shaking his head.

"Your fiance?" Harvey asked as Patrick confirmed with a nod.

"We had an argument. It was a stupid one too, it doesn't matter what it was about because she stormed out just like mom did and then the accident happened. You know it's not nice having the last memory of your future wife being an argument." Patrick whispered wiping his eyes away.

"I know what you mean. You never know what the world is capable of Patrick. You think that you've lost your soul mate but maybe there's someone else God had planned for you. Maybe I've seen too many movies, you know, love at first sight? Did you love her at first sight?" Harvey asked as Patrick nodded his head unable to speak. "You think you could love somebody just by looking at them but when I met your mother it was like I already knew her. You know. Maybe the same will happen to you again. And usually the prettier they are the crazier they get and your mother was coo-coo-crazy." Harvey said as both of them started to laugh before a pregnant pause ensued between the both of them.

"What are you gonna do when mom marries Stephen?" Patrick asked breaking their silence.

"I don't know. Maybe go back to New York. Maybe I'll even come to the wedding if your mother invites me but I doubt that'll happen. It'll make everything awkward for her. No one wants their happiest day of their life to be ruined by the glimpse of the thing that grounds you back to reality and pain." Harvey said looking down on the floor.

"So you're not gonna try and win her heart back or anything?" Patrick asked turning his face to look at him.

"You know I always believed that men were more romantic than women. I'm not saying that because I'm a man but because when we get married we marry like one girl because we'll resist it or something, the whole way. Till we meet the one girl, and we think _'I'd be an idiot not to marry this girl, she's so great'_. But seems like girls get to a place where they decide and pick who they wanna marry. Like they'll say that the guy they're marrying has a good job and that doesn't make sense to me because they spend their whole life looking for their Prince Charming and they marry the one guy that's got a good job and that's gonna stick around for longer. They don't go out and marry people they love because they're not prepared to take a risk. I guess that's why I won't try and change your mother's mind. She know Stephen's got a good job and he'll stick much longer than I lasted. At the end of the day love isn't about meeting a girl, falling in love with each other and getting married to her. To underestimate love is saying the world is round with grass and the sea." Harvey said placing an hand on his shoulder. "I'll leave you on your own now. It's okay to be angry once in a while but there's a difference between being angry and cruel but as you get older you'll understand more."

Harvey got up slowly nodding and walked away.

"Dad?" Patrick calledas Harvey turned around to look down at him. "Thanks for the advice."

* * *

The house phone went off as Murph quickly ran from the sofa and answered it before Harvey or Patrick could react. "Hello?"

"Hey Murphy." Donna spoke as Murph felt herself ease up.

"Mommy! I miss you so much." Murph said leaning against the wall and winding the cord around her finger.

"I miss you more too." Donna said as Harvey and Patrick heard Murph on the phone as they attention focused to her.

"Please don't be mad at me because you're mad at Patrick." Murph said biting her lip across the line.

"I'm not mad at you sweetie. I-I just needed time to myself. Mommy got upset that's all." Donna said sympathetically.

"Are you still angry at me and Patrick?" Murph asked innocently.

"I'm not mad at either of you." Donna explained. "It's just sometimes you need to lose your mind before you come to your senses and I guess I needed some time for myself."

"Mommy how far are you?" Murph asked desperately.

"A few hours away." Donna said pinching her nose.

"You are coming home, aren't you?" Murph asked as there was a pause between them.

"Of course I'm coming home. I'll be home tomorrow afternoon." Donna said as Murph smiled.

"You promise?" Murph asked as she looked at Patrick and Harvey.

"I promise."

"I just want you home, Mommy."

"I will be." Donna said reassuring her. "I've got to go now, see you tomorrow baby."

* * *

 **THE NEXT DAY**

Murph's eyes widened to the sound of the car entering the driveway as the tyres crunched against the gravel. "Mommy's here!"

Donna got out of her car as Murph ran towards her. Donna saw her running and picked up hugging her as Murph wrapped her legs around her as the both of them squeezed against each other. She put her hand and held her hand as Donna walked towards Patrick smiling at them.

"I got you some blueberry muffins." Donna said handing Patrick a packet full of muffins.

"I'm so sorry for saying that to you." Patrick said diving in to hug her as he placed his face on her collarbone.

"It's ok, Pat," Donna whispered patting his back, "I understand where you were coming from. I'd hate myself too."

"I was upset and I overreacted. You know I don't _really_ hate you, right?" Patrick asked looking at her.

"I know." Donna said. "Can you get my suitcase in?" She asked handing him her car keys.

Patrick nodded as he walked towards her car with Murph following her.

"How was the drive?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"Tiring." Donna said sighing.

"Where'd you go?"

"Manchester. I had a friend who lived there and she let me stay there for a few days." Donna said looking at Harvey and back at Patrick opening the boot of the car.

"It wasn't a good idea for you to drive all the way there." Harvey said putting a hand through his hair and taking a big breath as Donna walked away shaking her head.

* * *

"Did you guys have fun then?" Donna asked shutting the door to Murph's room.

"It was hard to have fun when we didn't know where you were, when you were coming back, IF you were coming back and what was happening to you. I guess your accident made us overly cautious." Harvey said looking at her leaning against Murph's door and crossing his arms.

"You didn't have to stop bonding without me." Donna said shaking her head.

"With the way you walked out you could have at lease called. What else were we supposed to do? Just hope for the best?" Harvey asked biting back.

"I did call back." Donna said defending herself.

"After four days. 96 hours later. When all we could do was pray that nothing happened to you. It's one thing to walk out on me, that's completely fine because you did it once because but to walk out on them is the worst thing a parent could do." Harvey said lividly.

"I was only going to be gone for a few days." Donna said as they walked down the stairs into the living room with the tv on.

"Patrick didn't know that! Murph didn't know that! Patrick leaned his lesson the minute you walked out so you could have come back a few hours later if you hate too and-"

"I didn't leave over what Patrick said. I just need time to myself. When I woke up from my coma my whole world was turned 180 degrees. I haven't had any time to my thoughts which is ironic because I spent 6 months with nothing but my thought driving me insane! And to make things worse you're all pushing me around with what you want. Patrick wants something, Murph wants something, Stephen wants something and you want something. All of you want something from me! You all do! I needed to be far away from all you as possible to think logically and I know I shouldn't have walked out like that but it needed to happen." Donna said taking a big breath and pinching her nose and rubbing her face.

Harvey walked towards the drawer and gave Donna a bunch of papers with a pen on top to stop them from falling. "What are those?"

"The papers you wanted, they're done." Harvey said putting his hands in his pockets.

"Let's go into the guest room here." Donna said pointing to the room next to the kitchen as they walked in and closed the door behind with Harvey taking the papers.

"I've already signed it. Just read through it just in case you don't like the terms but everything's there." Harvey said handing her the papers.

She took the papers and skin read through the paragraphs and nodded to the terms as she then read what the paper said about the grounds of their divorce. She put the paper onto the bed and left the pen on the page as she looked at him.

"There are some things you need to hear from me before we do this. I don't want us to fight before we end this." Donna said looking at him "I'm not sure how but if Patrick knows but I want you to hear it from me...a few days before the crash, I decided to marry Stephen."

The man inwardly cringed as he recalled the conversation he came across in her subconscious. And worse, Stephen' blissfully smug grin afterwards.

"I sorta figured that out." Harvey said bitterly.

"I don't understand-"

"Understand what?" Harvey asked angry as Donna took a deep breath.

"Why you still hate me." Donna whispered as Harvey looked at her angrily.

"Donna you broke me. You broke my heart. And I hate you." Harvey whispered as Donna looked at him sadly. "I hate you because I still love you."

"I didn't agree to marry him because I loved him. He pushed me and I agreed because I thought that I wasn't going to see you ever again. I though about what life with Stephen would be like and there were a lot of positives, more positives than negatives. It was going to be easy to start a new life with him because we'd been together for so many years before and Mom and Dad liked him for his honesty and loyalty."

"I get it. Harvey turning turning to the last page and showing her where to place her signature with a blank line as he sat down on the bed with Donna looking down at him.

"I hope you-"

"Anything you wanna tell me?" Harvey said looking down at the floor for a moment then back up at her. "Anything you think I might wanna know before I leave you...forever and never come back? You know like another kid, another fling you might of had? I mean I gotta leave in a few hours and I don't know what to do."

"You do what you gotta." Donna replied nodding her head trying not to cry.

"What you gonna do without me? You tell me you gonna marry him but you're gonna be miserable. No one gets a divorce and gets a happily ever after. You just gonna waste your miserable life getting busy and watch life fly by?" Harvey asked looking at her.

"Yeah, I'm gonna be real busy." Donna said starting to feel sad as she nodded.

"So I guess it ends here huh? We'll go our separate ways and I hope we see each other somewhere in the future? The worst part about all this is that it doesn't help that all the songs were suddenly about you which means I gotta get rid of most of my record collection when I get back. "Harvey said standing up and looking down at her. "Just sign the papers. You know where to send them." He said walking past her towards the door. He put his hands on the door knob before she spoke.

"I don't want a divorce." Donna said as Harvey took his hand away from the door knob leaning his forehead against it as closing his eyes.

"Stop playing around. You think this is some kind of game?" Harvey asked turning around to face her.

"I ain't playing around Harvey." She said ripping the papers on the floor. "The more reasons that pointed for me to marry Stephen the more I felt sick because I realised that it's you or nothing. I waited so long for you because I wanted **y** _ **ou** _ to come back and take me back home. I wanna be your everything."

Harvey opened his mouth and he left it hanging because he'd been running scenarios over his head about how she'd say her final goodbye. She took the papers and teared them to pieces.

"I know it'll be hard to trust me but can you trust me again?" Harvey asked whispering.

"But I do. I don't think you'll want to trust me..."

"Donna are you sure us getting together is what you want?" Harvey asked one last time.

"I know what I want." Donna whispered as she walked towards him and placed her lips against hers.

He couldn't breathe, he kissed her lips like her lips were air.

He tasted her soft lips and her scent that made the both of them gasp for air only to kiss again but this time playing with each other's tongue as if they had memorised each other's lips. He took his tongue out of her mouth and broke their kiss as he pressed his lips into the crook of my neck which made Donna moan a little.

"Lock the door." Donna whispered and biting his earlobe as he got up and walked towards the door still biting on her neck locking the door.

He walked back to the bed and places his mouth against hers again as he placed her on the bed as he moved his hands to the back of Donna's dress and slid the zipper down.

"You know how I want it." Donna whispered looking at him as her hands fumbled to his belt.

"I didn't know you were that desperate." Harvey whispered taking his top off showing how his now even more lean body. "But I guess I preferred you when you were horny."

"Of course you do, because you know we're going to fuck harder than we did last time." Donna whispered taking his belt off and slowly pulling his pants down.

"You don't know how hard I am." Harvey whispered attacking her neck making her whimper as she managed to pull his boxers down feeling his hard member against her thigh.

"I'm so fucking horny now. I can't wait for you to fuck me!" Donna giggled and nuzzled his cheek again.

"I love when you speak dirty." Harvey whispered as her lips softly kissed his flushed cheek . Donna's hand worked its way back to his sac. She rubbed and tugged on his balls.

She leaned down and kissed his lips. It felt like sparks were flying between their mouths. Instantly, they opened in unison and tasted each other. They melted into each other and moaned softly, back and forth. Donna's hand stroked his shaft faster as their needs grew.

 _ **Two hours later**_

Their tongues massaged the other's and tasted as much of the other's mouth as they could. Harvey's hand gripped Donna's side and pulled her tighter against him. They kissed hungrily, saliva smearing on their lips. Smacking their lips against each other's as they feasted on the kiss.

"Fuck Harvey...you make me feel like I'm 19." Donna whispered seductively biting his earlobe.

Donna slowed back down, squeezing his hard member with her walls. She felt him throb like he was about to cum. She settled with his cock inside of her, rocking softly again.

"Oh Harvey. That got your horny didn't it? I haven't felt this way since the first time we fucked in my apartment. I was lonely but so fucking horny for your cock to fuck me like a whore." Donna said as she let go of the headboard with one hand and reached behind her, squeezing his balls.

She leaned down and kissed his lips. Her hand came away from his balls. Harvey wrapped one arm around her hips and pulled her down on him harder. Donna's body responded and gave him what he wanted.

"I don't ever want to stop fucking you," Harvey moaned into her mouth.

"You don't have to," Donna moaned back. "I'm with you now, forever and ever. We can go back to New York with the kids, back to your apartment and fuck whenever we want too. Patrick would love it and Murph would too."

She kissed along his jaw and up to his ear as she rode him vigor. She licked and nibbled his ear as she panted.

"I wish I could fuck you bent over our dining room table again." Harvey groaned into her ear.

Upon hearing his words, Donna popped her head back up. It took her a split second to come up with a solution to his wish. "I want you fuck me everywhere."

She lifted her torso back up and slammed herself down onto him as she spoke, "I want you to fuck me in the kitchen and on the sofa."

Harvey spanked her again and her cunt gripped his cock. "I want you in the shower and in my office."

"Fuck yes, your so naughty like me." she said in a deep moan. "I want you to eat my pussy when I'm sitting on the kitchen counter."

Harvey continued slapping her ass. She bounced more urgently on him. Her tits swayed wildly on her chest. Her slick cunt made sloppy sounds as she pistoned herself on his rod.

"I want to fuck you in your recliner chair and on the rug in the front room," he grunted. "I want to take you, bent you over your desk and fuck your ass."

"I want you ride me me on my desk chair and I want to pound you on desk," he groaned, digging his nails into her ass.

"I want to fuck you at the movie theatre." Donna gasped.

Hearing her words made Harvey's cock swell larger. He held her down on him and buried himself inside.

"Where would we do that?" he asked, denying himself an orgasm again.

Donna stayed almost perfectly still, letting him calm down as her cunt grasped on his organ.

"There's offices that leads to the projection room, you know where the bakery was." She said catching her breath for a moment. She pushed the strands of her mane stuck to her skin off of her face. "No one ever goes up there. Like ever," she said in a moan as she picked up speed and force like she hadn't stopped.

They grinded their bodies into each other roughly, pure animalistic lust had completely taken them over. They traded heavy grunts and moans back and forth as their genitals pounded into each other. Harvey's pubic hair was soaked with her leaking nectar.

"Harvey, I want your cum inside of my cunt. I need it inside me," Donna begged. "I need it now. I can't wait any longer."

Harvey groaned with his face hidden between her creamy tits.

"Suck my nipples, please. I want to cum with my lover," Donna moaned.

Harvey latched his mouth onto her right nipple, sucking it hungrily. His fingers pinched and tugged the other.

Donna looked over into the mirror, seeing herself riding him and how sexy she looked. Her hair danced against her back and her ass jiggled just as it slammed down on his pelvis. Harvey's mouth was attached to her tit and his hands grabbing her body. It was too much for her.

"I'm so close to cumming Harvey. You better come when I cum." Donna whispered.

Her eyes closed and she bit down hard on her lip, almost making it bleed. It was the only thing she could do to keep herself from screaming as every fiber in her being turned over to ultimate pleasure once more. She shuddered and writhed, quivering and quaking. The only thing she could focus on was the sensations in her genitals as her body melted into climax.

Harvey held her tight, fighting to keep himself buried inside of her as she squirted on his cock. Her juices spurted out around him and soaked into the sheets. Her walls pulsed on him, desperate to squeeze him out, but he held on.

He released himself inside of her, shooting ropes of cum inside of her cunt as it milked him of his seed. They groaned and grunted in thick, heavy unison.

When Donna's eyes blinked open she looked down at him, smiling sweetly with trembling lips. He was looking up at her, deeply satisfied. His eyes were glazed over and his cheeks were flushed. She leaned down and kissed his sweat stained forehead before pulling herself up.

Donna held onto the headboard and lifted her legs. She settled with her feet against the side of his chest and her pussy was wide open, dripping his pearly seed.

She grinned and reached down between her legs. Harvey didn't think she could be any sexier, but he was wrong.

He watched as she dug his cum out of her and fed herself their mixed intimacies right in front of his eyes. She gathered as much as she could, some pooled in her palm.

"Wow," he muttered, "that's insanely hot."

Donna giggled as she sucked her fingers clean, and then licked all over her hand. "And, you're yummy."

Donna slid off of him and licked up any of his spunk that had dripped onto his chest, before settling into his nook.

"I'm really glad we did this," Donna said softly.

"You wanna go another round?" Harvey asked kissing her all over her chest feeling the taste of her salty sweat.

"Maybe in a few minutes, after I eat the mess you made." Donna whispered giggling as Harvey's mouth devoured hers.

* * *

Donna woke up in her room with Harvey's arms folded around her. Her fingers combed through his hair as she smiled staring at him.. "Morning handsome."

"Morning kitty." Harvey whispered kissing her jaw.

"New nickname? I'm gonna have to get used to that." Donna whispered smiling.

"I could call you Bella if you want me too." Harvey said moving his hand up and down the side of her thighs.

"Remind me why you call me Bella." Donna whispered moving towards him and kissing his cheek.

"Because Bella in Italian means beautiful and your name in Italian means woman and we both agreed that you're a woman...I even gave you a thorough examination." Harvey whispered smiling.

"I think I might need another anatomy lesson from your Dr Specter." Donna said giggling.

"I'm a doctor or law and your body. Every curve." Harvey whispered moving his hand up her body. "Every weak spot." He said kissing her neck as she rolled her eyes back slowly.

"How'd we end up in my room?" Donna asked looking around.

"You wrapped your body around me whilst I was-"

"I remember now." Donna said blushing as they gazed at each other for a few minutes staring at each others' beauty. "Tell me something."

"The sky is blue." Harvey whispered smirking.

"Something else."

"The grass is green."

Donna rolled my eyes and turned on her side to face him, propping herself up on her elbow. "How did you get all those scars?"

He turned his head to face her. "What scars?"

"The ones…the ones on your chest, and stomach. I...I don't remember you having any." Donna whispered curious. A curtain of hair to fell onto her face as she felt his fingers push it gently away and tuck it behind her ear making her melt inside.

"There's a different story for each of them." Harvey said looking down at them.

"Let me see them then." She said softly, but it was more of a question than a demand.

"Alright." he drawled slowly, and his hands pushed away the covers, exposing himself to her. He waved a hand to his muscled body. "Pick one," he whispered.

She bit my lip as she picked a scar on his left arm that was draped across his side. It was thin and there were three parallel marks.

He smiled. "About a year after you left I started to take care of Mike and Rachel's cat. I think maybe because I always wanted one I wanted to take care of it. One day they decided that the cat needed a dress for Halloween, and Mike held it while I put the dress on. The problem was, the cat was never declawed. But we did manage to get the dress on, but it didn't stop the bastard cat from scratching me.."

She smiled a little at the story and picked another one, a ragged square like one on his left side. "This one."

"On my way back from my meeting I tripped and fell over some train tracks. That was from the bolt that held the track down."

"It cut you?" Donna asked rubbing her thumb over it.

"It did indeed. Luckily there was a nurse that helped me. A male nurse just in case you were interested." Harvey said.

She dipped her head in agreement, and picked one on his ribs. It was dark, unlike the others, and didn't really have a particular shape.

Another smirk, that was half grimace, formed on his lips. "Christmas party at the firm. I tried to set off fireworks. Backfired a little bit. Well, a lot. Louis has one on his leg from the same thing…but we managed to get a few of them in the air so it was…"

"A good battle scar?"

"Yeah." he said, looking up at me, "A good battle scar."

It went on like that for a while, as she picked more and more scars and he explained them to her in full, never seeming to tire of my inquisition, never seeming to falter too long over the "bad battle scars." After a while, tired of being propped up on his elbow, he sunk back on the bed, laying on his back.

She paused for a moment before moving on to the next one a scar that trailed on his right side, a little bit in from his hip. She pointed at it, "This one."

"I can't quite see where you're pointing, Bella." Harvey said looking at her as she dipped her face a little trying to hide her blush.

Again, she paused, then ran my finger down the length of the scar. "This one,"she repeated, but her voice intentionally softer.

"Easy," he said, "Appendix."

"You removed your appendix?" Donna asked opening her jaw a little. Did it hurt?"

"Mmnh, a bit," he said, and she could tell he was probably downplaying it.

She moved on to a sister scar that started on his left hip and followed it down. "What about this one?"

The smile on his lips was not exactly a happy one. "Murph."

"Murph?" Donna asked crossing her eyebrows confused.

"We had a sword fighting contest in New York and she scored." Harvey said smiling at the memory as Donna started to look at the scar in regret.

"But that's only the start of the scar, here, look," he said, his thumbs coming up to the hemline of his boxers. She recoiled a little bit and he chuckled. "Don't worry, Bella, it's not that far down, here, see?" He took her hand and gently traced her finger an inch below his hem where the scar burst into an erratic star pattern, probably from where the blade exited. Her fingers rested there, playing with the small bump of scarred skin. Harvey's eyes were focused on her intently, and she barely noticed when he reached up and pushed hair out of her face again. "You wanna see the worst scar?"

He guided her hand up to a roundish, puckered scar beneath his left collar bone. He traced it with her thumb for a minute.

"What is it?" She asked quietly, half afraid to know the answer.

"It's when I shot myself," he said, and she felt her heart stop, and her lungs go paralyzed before her heart picked up tempo again, more rapid than before. "When I tried to kill myself."

"How…how long ago?" She asked, feeling her chest clenching.

"Less than a year ago." he said, and she had to bite her lip to keep it from trembling.

"Did it hurt?" She whispered with her voice shaking a little.

"Like hell," he said. "But it was a through and through. Here, see?" he rolled his shoulder up slightly and she leaned forward over it, feeling the scar that came out the other side. She could feel unshed tears welling in my eyes.

She looked down at him to saw him looking up at her, waiting for her reaction. When he saw her eyes, he fell back again wordlessly, but reached up a hand to brush away a stray tear that had fallen down her cheek. She found herself leaning into the palm there, relishing in the feeling of the living skin. She closed her eyes.

"Does it still hurt?" She asked, hearing the tears in her voice, even.

He held her gaze for a moment and she could see the internal debate in his eyes on what to tell her. Finally he looked away. "Sometimes," he admitted, his thumb automatically brushing away another tear and then delving itself into her hair, playing with its soft strands. "No more tears, remember?"

"But you almost killed yourself and I'm so happy you never because we wouldn't be here. And the worst part is that I wouldn't know if you died because-"

"But I never killed myself because I knew we'd meet each other one day and I didn't want to take that away." Harvey whispered back as Donna rested her face on his chest. "But I'm more interested in your battle scars."

"I don't have any battle scars." Donna whispered looking up at him from his chest.

Harvey slowly placed his hands on her arm as he turned it around running him thumb along faint red marks across her wrists. He took her second wrist and saw the same exact marks. "Your father told me you tried to slit your wrists. Why'd you try to hurt yourself?"

"If you thought I tried to hurt myself..." Donna whispered and suddenly pausing as she felt a lump in her voice. "...slitting my writs...you wouldn't have helped me if you thought I was hurting myself. I was trying to stop the pain."

It was at the moment as Harvey closed his eyes in pain as as tear escaped from Donna's eyes. Harvey kept his eyes closed as he moved Donna closer towards him. "You know one of the reasons why I knew you were perfect?"

"I'm not perfect, no one is." Donna whispered wiping her tears.

"Wrong answer." Harvey whispered back cleaning her face and placing his fingers through her hair.

"I'm listening." Donna said.

"It's because I'm like 6ft tall and you're like 5'8 and every time we hug you can feel my heartbeat so tell me what you feel?" Harvey whispered as Donna placed her ear against his chest feeling a heartbeat.

"I can feel your heartbeat." Donna whispered smiling.

"Now tell me what's happening when I do this." Harvey whispered grabbing her hand and placing it on his face as she felt a steady increase in his heartbeat.

"I don't know where this is going but I want us to remember this." Donna whispered moving up slowly and slowly kissing his lips.

"How are we going to tell Patrick and Murph?" Harvey asked against her lips as Donna broke her kiss smiling.

"I think they'd be devastated." Donna said laughing a little as she wiped the remaining tears away from her face..

"I don't think they'd want that. They might even try and run to Australia." Harvey said as Donna smiled.

"You think a kiss would do it?" Harvey asked kissing her lips again as she kissed back slowly and breaking it on time with his.

"Not in front of Murph, she's gonna end up hornier than me." Donna said giggling.

"Don't say that about her, she probably already knows everything about sex." Harvey commented as Donna nodded her head.

"Let's act like nothing happened. I mean I've got bed hair now so Patrick'll know we fucked." Donna said giggling as Harvey smiled.

"I should punish you for using so much vulgar language last night. You could make a nun blush." Harvey whispered back moving his hand up and down her back.

"Not my fault you're a great lover." Donna said smiling. "I say we act casual then do something subtle to catch them off guard."

"Someone's feeling vengeful." Harvey said laughing.

"I still have 11 years of sex to catch up with." Donna said biting her lip.

"Oh I'm gonna make sure you'll get 15 years worth of sex by the time I'm done with you...tonight." Harvey said smiling.

"I forgot how much of a tease you are." Donna said kissing his nose.

"I should put my suit on and leave my suitcase by the stairs. They won't know that I'm taking it up to your-"

" _Our_ room," she corrected.

* * *

So Donna and Harvey were up and showered together, dressed and were in the kitchen by the time the kids dragged themselves down from their rooms to the kitchen table. They still thought Harvey was leaving at noon and the suitcase by the stairs did nothing to lift their moods. They sat at the table quietly watching their parents cook.

Harvey poured two glasses of blood orange juice for their son and daughter. "I know you're a little upset but I need you to get dressed after breakfast."

"Are we not going to drive Dad to the airport?" Patrick asked taking the glass and looking at his father sadly.

"We wanted to say goodbye at the gate." Murph said.

"You don't need to." Donna said cracking her egg and placing it on the frying pan.

"But—"

"School starts Tuesday and we need to get your uniform Murph and your supplies and textbooks Patrick." Donna said putting her hands on her hips.

"But Mommy..."

" _And,_ we all need new clothes." Donna said sliding the cooked eggs on the plate.

"Why?" Murph said pouting and drinking her apple juice.

"Your dad and I are getting our **vows renewed** next weekend." Donna said casually as she turned to Harvey, "Could you grab some butter from the fridge?"

Patrick's jaw hit the groud and he started to smile. Murph sat up cheerfully, "Does that mean Daddy's staying another weekend?"

" _ **Murph!** _ That means Dad's staying _**FOREVER.** " _Patrick said as Murph shrieked making Donna and Harvey grin.

Both of his kids ran towards him as they embraced in a group hug as Donna slid in under Harvey's arm as the four of them hugged together. Donna grabbed Harvey's face and kissed him as Patrick and Murph looked at each other embarrassed.

"Mommy...Patrick told me to kiss every boy that helped my work...what am I doing wrong?" Murph asked innocently as the pair looked at Patrick who sent daggers to Murph.

"It was APRIL FOOLS DAY!" Patrick replied defending himself.

 _The End_


	23. 12 Years Later

**_I know that the last chapter I did was an official ending but I bad the idea for this chapter and had to write it. This chapter more or less takes place 12 Years after the events of the last chapters. It's short but sweet and unfortunately there's no appearance from Patrick or Murph and it's just Donna and Patrick._**

* * *

"You ever wonder why life moves faster as we grow older?" Donna asked sitting next to Harvey on the couch and snuggling up to him.

"Telescopy." Harvey replied as Donna moved her head to look up at him confused as she saw the grin on his face.

"Are you grinning because you know a word I don't?" Donna asked as Harvey tried hard not to laugh.

"I guess I win the bet then." Harvey said looking down as Donna shook her head and smacked him lightly. "That still hurts Donna!"

"I thought I already won the game when you didn't know what onomatopoeia meant." Donna replied grabbing a pillow to hit his body as Harvey grabbed one of his own to defend himself.

"If you hit me hard enough you'll break my ribs woman. I'm not getting any younger and neither are you!" Harvey said trying to get to her as Donna stopped for a moment as she dropped the pillow and adjusted her hair.

"You're right. That's why I still do yoga and now I'm a cougar." Donna said staring at her body.

"Oh god." Harvey sighed rolling his eyes.

"You should be thanking the mother of your children that I'm as good looking as I am. Who knows what could have happened if you ended up with that soccer coach." Donna stated looking down at her.

"She'd have a better stamina." Harvey muttered staring at the TV.

"What'd you say?" Donna asked.

"Nothing darling." Harvey said looking at her as they stared at each other for a moment before laughing and eventually snuggling up with each other. "Telescopy. It's the underestimation of time. It's a phenomenon where you're looking through a telescope and the details of what you see give you the impression that an object in the distance is much closer than it actually is. Because of telescopy, our brains recall distant events as if they occurred only yesterday. That's why life goes faster as we get older."

"No wonder it feels like yesterday when we got back together." Donna said sighing and locking her fingers with Harvey's and holding onto it tightly.

"When Patrick came to my house when you were in the hospital, he showed me all of his videos from his camera." Harvey said as Donna froze for a second holding onto his hand tighter and looking at the TV. "Seeing Patrick grow up in a series of videos was devastating. I had to close my eyes for a moment and I had to believe in a world outside my mind and when he told me that Murph is mine...I had to believe that the world was still there."

Donna listened as she tried hard not to say anything but she closed her eyes and tried to muster the courage to say something. "Before I recorded my message..." She spoke as Harvey stopped to listen as Donna turned her body to look him in the eye. "...I was having these nightmares. The books on my shelves would fall down and for a second I thought it was a ghost because it was the same books over and over. It was the night before where I was sound asleep and another fell off. I woke up and realised that it wasn't a book this time. I got up and walked to the bookshelf and this box had fallen down that I kept all the way at the top and behind everything because it was a box full of your picture. I sat down on the carpet of the room and I was going through pictures of you, of us and I couldn't go through the photo's without crying. You were my ghost. People thought that I was crazy that I was doing it all by myself but...I knew who it was. Nobody believed me but I knew it was a sign you would come back."

"How?" Harvey asked holding her hand staring deep into her eyes.

"Because my husband promised me." Donna whispered wiping a tear from her eye.

"I'm here now Donna." Harvey replied by taking her hand and kissing the back of it. "You know I see my life different because of you. There was 12 years where we were as shy as teenagers who were scared about what would happen if we say what we truly felt. Then there's the years of happiness in our marriage but then there's 12 years after that where my body was a cage where I knew my mind held the key but I was too afraid to be free. And there's there the years after that where I'll never forget anything. I don't even remember how I lived without you, I just can't. Maybe it's because I'm old and weary and at the point where I could die anytime soon but-"

Donna quickly stopped him from speaking as he placed her lips against his as the both of them kissed slowly. "Don't say that. I don't want to think about you dying. Just don't think about it. Life's too short. If you don't stop and look around for a while you might miss it."

"But I've already done that and I found something that I couldn't miss at all." Harvey replied.

"So Murph is getting married." Donna said casually as Harvey sat still for a moment before doing a double take and then jumping as if something had stung him.

"WHEN? WHAT? WHO? WHERE? WHEN DID HE PROPOSE TO HER?!" Harvey asked speaking quickly making Donna laugh.

"She proposed to him actually. He almost had a heart attack from the nerves." Donna replied giggling.

"She's marrying an idiot though. And do you know how awkward it's going to be seeing my future son in law working in the same building as me?" Harvey asked as Donna shook her head slowly.

"Firstly he's a lovable idiot and secondly I can relate to that. A lot. Especially since we practically had sex on your desk when I came back and don't be surprised if they're in his office-"

"I'm not gonna let them have sex on my desk. And don't put these thoughts in my head god damn it." Harvey said closing his eyes and wincing.

"You're doing that all by yourself. I think I'm rubbing off on you." Donna said giggling as lying on her back and watching him wince at the thought.

"You ever thought about how we're gonna let life go by once Murph moves out?" Harvey asked as Donna looked up at him sadly.

"I don't know. I mean I've spent all my life with them I can't imagine life without them. This house, we bought it for them and I hate life can be cruel because they're all going to go." Donna said trying to hold back any tears.

"I'm sorry for bringing it up." Harvey whispered as he got Donna up slowly and hugged her as she clenched her arms across the side of her body.

"Someone had to bring it up." Donna whispered sniffling and wiping a tear from her face.

"Remember what I said about tears?" Harvey asked looking down at her and stroking her head.

"No tears. Not even the happy ones." Donna whispered as she turned her head to look up at him. "I'm so glad I get to spend the rest of my life with you. Tell me you're glad too."

"I'm glad to spend the rest of my life with you." Harvey replied as Donna hugged tighter.

"Tell me that everything's going to be okay and that I won't have to feel lonely once the kids are gone." Donna whispered placing her forehead against Harvey's.

"You won't ever feel lonely..." He replied locking both of his fingers with hers. "And I'll always stay with you. I want us to enjoy the little things in life like this because when I look back I want to realise it was bigger than I could have ever expected. I promise-"

"Don't promise me anything Harvey. I just want you to grow old with me. I want us to make fun of each other's wrinkles and laugh at them. I want you to joke that women look older when they get older and I want to laugh so you can see the lines on my face when I laugh which'll make you smile. I want to sit next you and tell you everything from my diary as a teenage kid and the love poems I would post to my future husband. When you misplace your reading glasses I want to read the morning newspaper for you because your eyes won't handle the colours from the TV. I want you to tell our grandkids about how good the old days were and how Obama is the best President of all time. I just want to spend every say with you and grow old." Donna whispered as Harvey hugged intimately.

"Okay. Now don't get sad now. Besides, we have the whole house to ourselves." Harvey whispered grinning and Donna closed her eyes and smiled.

"Well what are you waiting for Mr Specter. I'm not getting any younger." Donna whispered as Harvey kissed her against the couch slowly. "I love you."

"I know." Harvey whispered back.


End file.
